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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    In their first summer after being outed, Shane finally accepts that invite to Bood's backyard barbecue. It could have been a relaxing night. But Ilya's brought vodka. And the Centaurs brought questions. Might as well rip off the band aid before he signs with Ottawa.

    Or

    How many shots is it worth to know what your Captain likes in bed?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,761
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    327
    Kudos:
    5,468
    Bookmarks:
    674
    Hits:
    31,387

    06 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Several MLH players have their phones hacked.

    Most people find embarrassing photos.

    Ilya Rozanov accidentally leaks five years' worth of sex reviews.

    -

    You know that TikTok trend where people rate how good the sex was in front of their partner?

    Yeah. It's that.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,853
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    238
    Kudos:
    7,105
    Bookmarks:
    1,274
    Hits:
    33,361

    06 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Go?” Rozanov repeats, and Shane thinks he manages to nod, thinks he manages to spin some kind of excuse that he knows Rozanov doesn’t really buy, but he needs to go. He needs to get out of here. He needs to find somewhere quiet and calm where he can ride out this panic and painful tightness until he can catch his breath again. He needs-

    He needs to go.

    “I’m sorry,” he says, turning heel and resisting the urge to just book it right for the front door only because he’d rather not have to explain to Hayden why he returned from a hookup with Boston Lily in men’s clothes that he certainly didn’t leave in.

    It’s not until he makes it halfway up the stairs to Rozanov’s bedroom that it occurs to him in a cold rush that it isn’t just anxiety that makes it this hard to breathe.

    “No,” he tells himself firmly, white knuckling the bannister and trying to take a deep breath just to prove that he can.

    It wheezes.

    (how the tuna meltdown is averted through the power of food allergies and anaphylaxis)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,169
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    418
    Kudos:
    8,259
    Bookmarks:
    1,906
    Hits:
    55,957

    06 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Sweetheart, your pretty little head is so silly. For every photocard I make of ugly hockey men, I make two of my gorgeous, radiant, pulchritudinous boyfriend. Sometimes three.”

    A smile breaks through the heated haze of Shane’s expression. “You’ve been using the thesaurus Dad got you for Christmas?”

    “I will beat Yuna Hollander at Scrabble one day,” Ilya declares against Shane’s hip bone.

    In the year between the Cottage and the Centaurs, Ilya misses Shane more than ever. Svetlana’s teenage cousin offers a coping method: Kpop-style Shane Hollander photocards to stare at all day long. It's a shame carrying around pictures of fellow hockey players is just not socially acceptable.

    …At least, not yet.
     
    (AKA: Ilya's mission to desensitize the hockey world to his Hollander fanboyisms, and the NHL players that suffer for it.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    35,708
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    489
    Kudos:
    5,246
    Bookmarks:
    1,743
    Hits:
    63,366

    06 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    five times their friends realize shane might be the scary one, after all -- and one time ilya reminds the world he's only soft for shane.

    OR

    their friends – and hayden fucking pike, who, for some reason, remains shane’s best friend – are slowly realizing they can be more complex than Hollander and Rozanov. they can be Shane and Ilya, too.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,046
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    22
    Comments:
    807
    Kudos:
    40,826
    Bookmarks:
    7,321
    Hits:
    337,384

    06 Jul 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Riley (Detroit): Is it too late to retire

    Riley (Detroit): Hayes what’s Hollander’s address and where can you buy a gun in Ottawa

    Hayes (Ottawa): HELLO?

    Riley (Detroit): I’m going to kill myself in front of him because WHAT WAS THAT

    St-Simon (Boston): I thought you were being dramatic until I checked the score wdym 6-1 😭😭😭😭

    Riley (Detroit): so many emojis from someone whose address is in my phone

    St-Simon (Boston): 🤐🤐🤐

    or, the goalies get revenge on drapeau for inflicting the horror that is a hollanov power play on the rest of the league (cameos from the censhome gc).

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,106
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    136
    Kudos:
    4,468
    Bookmarks:
    453
    Hits:
    22,635

    06 Jul 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “Curtis, let me get this straight,” Ilya said, still half asleep. ”Are you telling me I grow up in Russia, I worry whole time about dangers of being gay, I risk those dangers and my job when I am outed, am only safe after I marry my husband, but am lucky enough to never have formal trouble with tyrannical regime, only to officially be reprimanded by suburban Canadian neighborhood code for the property I own?”

    “No one is trying to stop you from being gay Mr. Rozanov.”

    “Hollander-Rozanov.”

    “We just ask that you follow the neighborhood’s bylaws about how you display it.”

    “Funny,” Ilya said dryly. “Putin told me the same thing.”

    OR Shane and Ilya Hollander-Rozanov are a lot of things, including bitchy gays. As they put up with less bullshit in married life, their petty side shows more. Never come between a professional ragebaiter and his bitch wife.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,067
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    177
    Kudos:
    1,915
    Bookmarks:
    349
    Hits:
    18,279

    05 Jul 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    So, it wasn’t that Ilya was here. That wasn’t what had caught David off guard when he’d opened the door. It wasn’t even that Shane wasn’t with him — he was staying the night in Montreal, where many of his connections were still based, and something in the back of David’s mind had been expecting a visit because of that — or that he’d knocked instead of letting himself in with a yell as he usually did.

    It was something subtler. His demeanour. David couldn’t place it immediately, but Ilya almost seemed… awkward.

    As a father with a lot of experience in these sorts of things, David’s instincts told him immediately that something wasn’t quite right.

    Or, when Ilya's scared to be alone and Shane's out of town, he ends up at the Hollander residence. Featuring Ilya & David fluff.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,177
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    56
    Kudos:
    1,066
    Bookmarks:
    124
    Hits:
    5,521

    05 Jul 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "Hey can I see you all in the lounge tomorrow? I have a new idea for a promo video."

    Or, Harris gathers the team to play Kiss, Marry, Kill.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,167
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    1,514
    Bookmarks:
    125
    Hits:
    12,222

    05 Jul 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    At night, the only way to escape Ilya’s loud snoring is to sleep somewhere else. (Un)fortunately for Shane, his husband always manages to find his way back to him, even in his sleep.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,346
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    47
    Kudos:
    2,448
    Bookmarks:
    295
    Hits:
    21,970

    04 Jul 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov, captain of the Boston Raiders, has a boyfriend. A definitely real, suspiciously (and boringly) handsome, conveniently offline, consistently unable to meet up in real life boyfriend.

    Who lives in Canada.

    Unfortunately for him, absolutely no one believes him.

    The more serious Ilya gets about his Totally Real Canadian Boyfriend™️, the more concerned his teammates become that someone either needs to call MTV and get him on the next episode of Catfish or that he's slowly losing his mind.

    Shane Hollander is, fortunately, very real, very sarcastic, and increasingly delighted that an entire NHL locker room seems to think that he's a government psyop to distract Ilya from his game.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,633
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    752
    Kudos:
    12,225
    Bookmarks:
    2,011
    Hits:
    78,847

    04 Jul 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    After Shane comes out, the Metros become convinced he might be attracted to them.

    Shane corrects this assumption with devastating precision, accidentally describes Ilya Rozanov in the process, and somehow turns the entire locker room into a deranged pageant of heterosexual insecurity.

    Edit: Additional content added 27/06/2026 in relation to future fic "The Benchmark" 😈

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,422
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    861
    Kudos:
    9,555
    Bookmarks:
    2,158
    Hits:
    74,379

    04 Jul 2026

  13. Public Bookmark 56

    Tags
    Summary

    It's not just poor Cliff Marlow has to process the fact that his best friend is married to Shane Hollander now, but that he also is a fucking smart ass.

    "But there are other… things."

    "Yes?" Shane felt Rozanov tensed up, despite keeping a calm face.

    "You also hid your bachelors degree."

    "Yes."

    "And your master's degree."

    "Obviously." Ilya nodded and chuckled. Why does it bother everyone so much. Is Marly ready sad about that stupid shit? "If you remember it was me who helped you to organise your money. How did you think I did that? "

    "Oh fuck off. I knew, you always were smart. I didn't think about that."

    "Well, I guess you need to think more," Rozanov smirked. "I will cook spinach tomorrow. Shane says it's good for brain."

    "You also cook," Marlow groaned.

    "Yes. For Hollander. He also cooks for me."

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,210
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    41
    Kudos:
    682
    Bookmarks:
    56
    Hits:
    9,045

    03 Jul 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya makes comments about Shane talking too much.

    Shane takes him seriously and attempts to stop talking.

    It doesn’t go well.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,966
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    536
    Kudos:
    10,817
    Bookmarks:
    2,128
    Hits:
    84,149

    02 Jul 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya clocks it very quickly when Shane comes home from an additional practice, carrying himself awkwardly and holding his weight off of his right ankle. He watches without a word as Shane attempts to walk properly, fighting the wince in his face. He wants to ask if Shane thinks he’s that good of an actor, or if Ilya is that stupid he can’t pick up on a hidden injury.

    Or, Shane hides an injury. Ilya isn’t impressed.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,359
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    129
    Kudos:
    4,684
    Bookmarks:
    842
    Hits:
    61,920

    02 Jul 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    (9:31pm) Ilya: I’m sorry I’ve been such a burden

    (9:33pm) Ilya: I know I’ve taken away your chance to explore yourself and find someone who’s good enough for you. I think you should take that chance now. If you find a nice boy in Montreal who you like, I promise I won’t stand in the way.

    (9:34pm) Ilya: If you still want me at the end of this, I’ll be waiting

    (9:34pm) Ilya: I’m sorry

    OR - Shane's friends keep telling him he can do better than Ilya. Ilya starts to believe them

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,683
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    374
    Kudos:
    3,206
    Bookmarks:
    1,138
    Hits:
    51,842

    01 Jul 2026

  17. Public Bookmark 41

    Tags
    Summary

    There isn't a competition Shane Hollander isn't determined to win - including his first Ottawa Centaurs Canada Day BBQ Hot Dog Eating Contest.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,772
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    38
    Kudos:
    285
    Bookmarks:
    41
    Hits:
    2,236

    01 Jul 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The Ottawa Centuar’s win the cup during Shane’s first season after signing. Yuna Hollander puts her boys on a marketing run of epic proportions while preparing for a season where all of Ottawa was hoping for a back-to-back cup run.

    -

    “Is Ilya Rozanov in a CCM commercial? Oh my god,” Shane laughed.

    Ilya looked surprised. “That is common question? What?”

    Shane was still laughing. “He absolutely was in a ccm commercial. With me. That was huge, I remember seeing those ads everywhere for our whole rookie season. Jesus Christ.”

    Ilya nodded seriously. “For the rivalry. Yes. Whoever came up with this idea was a super marketing genius. Don’t you agree Shane?”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,492
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    1,437
    Bookmarks:
    113
    Hits:
    8,429

    01 Jul 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “I’ve just gone viral.”

    “Viral?” Ilya questions curiously, now calmer that he knows everyone he cares about is safe. “What for?”

    Shane groans as he rapidly reads through messages, comments on posts, and article links on Twitter. “For being an idiot in love with you,”

    *

    While out with the team, a drunk Shane lets his teammates know why he loves his husband.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,019
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    127
    Kudos:
    4,041
    Bookmarks:
    469
    Hits:
    23,095

    30 Jun 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    When Cliff learns Ilya is moving to Ottawa for Canadian citizenship, he offers to marry Ilya so he stays and can get American citizenship, which somehow leads him to learn that "Jane" is actually THE Shane Hollander.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,253
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    115
    Kudos:
    4,501
    Bookmarks:
    410
    Hits:
    23,588

    30 Jun 2026

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