Chapter Text
Maybe Stede shouldn’t be surprised that a very intoxicated Ed forgot he had left the key to his flat under the doormat, but he still lets out a long-suffering sigh when he hears Ed’s voice whining through the letterbox.
“Mrowww, Stedeeeee,” Ed hiccups. “How could you leave me out here, a sad little kitty – hic – all alone. Meow.”
Stede muffles a giggle. He’s so cute.
“Meowww. Ugh.” There’s a thud, a brief moment of silence. “Stedeeee, your doormat is so itchy.” Another pause, then louder, like his face is pressed up right against the letterbox.. “Hic, I’m itchy for dick, Stede! YOUR DICK!”
Face burning, Stede finally throws open the door to find Ed collapsed on his doormat.
“Come in, you ridiculous kitty.”