Chapter Text
“You alright?”
Amanda snorted, trying to hold back her laughter, but failed miserably. Amanda’s laugh echoed through the entire room. It was loud and boisterous. It was music to Clarissa’s ears. Amanda clenched her stomach and took a couple of breaths before addressing Clarissa.
“Not this again,” Amanda giggled, “You don’t have to ask me every time.”
“I can’t help it,” Clarissa smiled as she took a seat next to her best friend, “I wanna know if you’re ok.”
“I’m doing wonderfully, honey,” Amanda placed a hand on her lap, sending a spark down Clarissa’s spine, “Especially now that you’re here.”
She could feel how hot her cheeks burned. “You wanted to see me?”
Amanda nodded as she took her hand off her lap and ran her hand through her hair. “Yeah, I wanted to talk.” She shifted her body so that she was face to face with Clarissa, “First, I just wanna say how proud of you I am. You’ve put so much effort into working on yourself, and it’s incredible. Growth ain’t easy, so I’m so, so proud of you, Clarissa.” Amanda placed her hand over hers, “I hope you’re as proud of yourself as I am of you.”
Clarissa grinned, “Thank you.” She laced her fingers with Amanda and they held hands for a while, staring at one another. All she could do was stare at Amanda’s lips and how soft they looked. Her heart rattled in her ribcage as they sat there, with their fingers laced. The tension was palpable.
“Do you remember how I said I’d wait for you until the time comes?”
“Yeah.”
“I don’t think I can wait any longer,” Amanda said, squeezing her hand. “Clarissa, I’m in love with you, too. I’ve been in love with you forever. It’s always been you, Clarissa. I’m so grateful you feel the same way.” Amanda tucked a stray strand of hair behind Clarissa’s ear before she whispered, “Can I kiss you?”
All Clarissa could do was nod.
Amanda cupped Clarissa’s cheek as she leaned in. The kiss was soft, delicate and all that Clarissa could ask for. It lit Clarissa on fire, as her stomach exploded with butterflies. Amanda gently squeezed her hand as she pressed her lips against hers. Her hand eclipsed Clarissa’s, and yet her grasp was so gentle. It made Clarissa melt inside. She leaned further towards Amanda, yearning for more contact. Clarissa didn’t know how long they stayed like that, but she didn’t care. It was perfect. It was absolutely perfect.
Amanda leaned back and smiled at Clarissa, soft and dopey. She giggled quietly and ran a hand through her hair. She looked like a goddess. Amanda was beautiful, and Clarissa didn’t know how she didn’t realise it before. She leaned towards her again, grinning as she looked up. This time, Clarissa cupped Amanda’s cheek.
She giggled as she whispered to Amanda, “I love you.”
All Amanda did in response was kiss her.
It was perfect.
“I love you, too.”
And nothing could go wrong after a kiss.
-
“Tom,” Luke grimaced, “I wanted to talk to you to apologise.”
“For what?” Tom cocked his head to the side.
“A, a lot of things, I don’t know where to begin,” Luke propped his hands together.
“It’s alright, take your time.”
Luke whipped his head towards him. Tom looked so worried for him, it was driving him insane. He bit the inside of his cheek and gritted out, “That’s exactly the problem.”
“I still don’t understand Luke-”
“Tom, how do you still have the patience for me? I’ve done nothing but ignore and shun you for the last couple of days, and I’m here snapping at you in a bar. I’m so mean to you, yet you still treat me so nicely. Just how?”
-
Titch yawned as he finished making lunch for himself and Derek. It was still early, in the morning, the sun not having even risen yet. Still, Titch wiped his brow as he stepped back and admired his handiwork. He’d followed the bento box tutorial to a T for Derek’s lunch box, cutting out the bread painstakingly into a little cat shape with a sharp kitchen knife and giving all the little animals faces. It was a little tacky, Titch had to admit, but Derek had mentioned in passing how much he envied the other children who had their parents make them packed lunches growing up. Titch told him that he’d make him a lunch that any kid would be jealous of one day. Derek only laughed and kissed him.
So that was how Titch found himself waking up in the early mornings researching packed lunches. It was a horrendous experience prying himself out of Derek’s very warm and cozy embrace, but it was a necessary evil. He’d spent about a week researching and preparing for the big day, looking up different bento box recipes and buying the necessary ingredients in secret.
Titch turned to his own lunchbox. He’d used the leftovers of Derek’s to make his, chucking in the ugly pieces of lettuce and crusts of leftovers to make something of a salad. It wasn’t pretty, but it would get the job then. He placed the lids on the Tupperware containers. He hummed softly to himself as he hung his apron on its designated hook. The clunky footsteps down the stairs told him all he needed to know. He popped on the kettle as he waited for Derek to join him in the kitchen.
“Hello, love,” Derek sleepily beamed at him as he dragged himself into the kitchen. His hair was sticking in all the cardinal directions and he was still wearing his silken pajamas. He was gorgeous. Derek trudged over and placed a kiss on Titch’s forehead before plopping his head on his shoulder, sighing.
“Morning, Derek,” Titch patted his boyfriend’s head, “Still half asleep?”
Derek let out a little groan, and Titch tutted softly.
“Come on, silly,” Titch grinned, “We’ve got a lot of work to do today.”
“Five more minutes…” Derek whined as he buried himself further into Titch’s shoulder. Titch laughed as he pushed him off. Derek caught himself just as he was about to fall, his eyes going comically wide as he stretched out both arms like a sugar glider. Derek gaped at him before pouting instead.
“You’re so evil”, he moaned, “I was comfortable.”
“At least you’re awake know,” Titch grinned, “The kettle’s ready now, come on now.”
Derek sighed and ran his hand through his hair, “I don’t know how I put up with you.”
“I made you a BLT for lunch.”
“Never mind, I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
-
“I’ve taken you for granted, and everything you’ve done for me. You’ve come to all my shows, you’ve supported my every choice, and you’ve always been there for me. How? Just how, Tom? ”
-
Clarissa giggled as she dragged Amanda towards the door of her apartment. Amanda gripped her hand.
“Honey, slow down, I can’t see where I’m going.”
Clarissa smiled as she turned back towards Amanda. The blindfold remained in place as Clarissa had put it on Amanda. She was as blind as a bat with those on, yet she still trusted Clarissa when she asked her to put them on. They held hands throughout the entire journey up the apartment complex, Amanda silently following her. They remained tethered to one another for the entire journey up to her apartment, never letting go. Amanda’s hand was hot like a furnace, and Clarissa’s was ice cold. Still, they made their way up, Clarissa guiding the blindfolded Amanda. She quite literally trusted her blindly, and it made Clarissa’s chest swell at the thought of it, to be trusted so much. She fiddled around trying to find her keys to Amanda’s apartment.
“Hang in tight there, Amanda.” Clarissa unlocked her door. “Mind your step.” She pushed upon the door and finally, finally let go of Amanda’s hand. She missed the warmth already. “You can take your blindfold off now.”
Amanda slowly blinked as she peeled off her blindfold, adjusting to the sudden brightness. She gasped.
“Surprise!” Mr Wilson and Tim let off party poppers as Clarissa’s mom clapped excitedly. Amanda rushed to their sides, bouncing on the balls of her feet as she released them from the bone crushing hug she gave them.
“Dad, Tim, what are you doing out here?”
Tim grinned, “Well, we heard about your promotion and we wanted to celebrate it!”
Mr Wilson chipped in, “Honestly, Amanda, you could have told us yourself, rather than letting your girlfriend do all the work, she drove us all the way here-”
Amanda whipped her head back to Clarissa, who was shyly looking down at her feet.
“Surprise?”
Amanda rushed back to her side and swept her up in a bone-crushing hug. Her embrace enveloped her completely, like being swaddled in a blanket. Clarissa did her best to hug her back. When she finally let go, Amanda held tightly onto her shoulders as she looked down at her. Clarissa’s head swam as Amanda looked at her as if she hung the stars in the sky.
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
-
“I’ve shut you out instead of talking to you properly, because I’ve been so in my own head. And fuck it, I might as well tell you why. Because after the longform, I couldn’t stop thinking. I couldn’t stop imagining what it would be like to be married to you and what would happen if I actually confessed my feelings to you. It was so beautiful, wasn’t it? But that could never happen, because I’m a self centred ass. Of course, you don't feel the same way.”
“Luke-”
“No, don’t you dare say anything. Because even if you did, I couldn’t allow it. Because how could you even? I’m not even your closest friend, how could I ever be someone special to you? Just how Tom?”
-
“So the stars, huh?”
“Yup, the stars.”
“That’s what you believe in?”
“It’s silly, isn’t it?” Titch turned to face Derek, “Believing in something that ain’t God, but still going to church.”
“Nothing silly in it, love,” Derek softly smiled, “Just different.”
“You know,” Titch sat up, “When I went to Church this weekend, I finally felt it. That divinity that they always preached about in Sunday school.”
“Oh? That’s when we got married.”
Titch nodded, “I saw God in your eyes when I kissed you as your husband. It felt like things were finally right. See, when I look into your eyes, I often see the stars. This time, though? It was more than divine, nothing like the stars. It felt like someone was looking out for me, that I finally got what I supposedly deserved. Yeah, that’s right, I found God in my husband.”
“Oh Titch,” Derek was on the verge of tears now, “That’s, wow.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
-
“I don’t deserve you even as a friend.” Luke was crying now, “How could I do all this if I love you? I love you so much, but I know you can’t feel the same. I wouldn’t allow it. The universe wouldn’t allow it. It’s not right. Please, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, Tom. Forgive me for loving you.”
He took Luke’s hand and held it. The two of them sat there for what felt like an eternity. Tom couldn’t find the words to answer him. His throat tightened as he listened to Luke’s heaves as he tried to control his crying. The words slowly made their way to his tongue.
-
“Titch, would you love me in every universe?”
“Hell no!”
-
“Why not love? We found each other in this one, we could do it again.”
“But you see the thing is…”
-
“You only exist in this universe.”
-
“And I couldn’t imagine there being anyone like you. No one who’s as empathetic, sassy-“
-
“-Patient or as kind as you are.”
-
“Not only that, I doubt that I could forgive anyone but you.”
-
“You’ve made so much progress, it’s incredible.”
-
“I’m so proud of you, how far you’ve come and how far you’ll go.”
-
“No one else could do that.”
-
“Not even you in another universe.”
-
“You’re the only one for me, love.”
-
“No matter if our souls find each other, I’ll only ever love you.”
-
“So fuck the universe, because it knows nothing. This time, I’m choosing you.”
Tom kissed Luke with all the passion he could muster. It felt like he was set ablaze as he kissed him. The kiss was awkward and messy. Tom didn’t know where to put his hands, and Luke nearly toppled over, but it came from the heart, and that was all that mattered to him. Teeth clacked together, and they nearly crashed into the wall. Luke laughed into the kiss.
It was perfect.
Tom couldn’t bear to open his eyes when they parted. He replayed the kiss in his head, wanting to relive it over and over again. When he finally peeled his eyelids back, he was met with Luke’s grinning face, still marked with tears. He grinned wider.
“So fuck the universe huh?”
"I love you."
"I love you, too, Tom."