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"Enemy of Herobrine" wasn't exactly a title anyone sane would want to have. Sure, Grian wasn't just anyone, (nor was he always particularly sane,) but he was still wary. But, above all, he was immensely confused. The look of horror on Jimmy's face was probably the reaction he should've had, but he was more preoccupied with finding answers.
However, he wasn't so completely single-minded that he'd ignore his frightened friend. He gently grabbed ahold of Jimmy once they were away from Pixl's study and out of earshot of anyone nearby. "Are you okay?"
"The legends scare people off," Jimmy stammered. "Joe said the legends scare people off. Please tell me—"
Grian moved back slightly. "Got it in one. But I promise you he's nothing like the stories. Or he's never been anything like the stories in any of the time I've known him, at least."
"But the book said—"
"I know. And I'm going to figure it out. But I promise you that the biggest danger Joe poses to you is boredom. That said, I need to go find him. Are you going to be okay processing everything on your own for a while?"
"Yeah." Jimmy sounded shaken but was recovering surprisingly quickly. "Go on."
Grian tracked Joe down with his Eyes until he found the man in question working on the Hermitopia tower. "We need to talk," he said sharply, leaving no room for argument. "Away from the others."
Joe must've seen the tension Grian carried because he quickly put his tools away without question. Grian led them away from Hermitopia and into the Nether. He took them far, far away from where any Player would hear or see them. He sat on the bedrock and dragged Joe down with him, hopefully making it clear that neither of them were going anywhere until this conversation was over.
"I want you to explain something for me," he said. He pulled out Pixl's book and flipped to the end of the section on Xelqua. "I want you to tell me what this is about and why Xisuma freaked out when he heard it." He tapped the words "Balance to Herobrine" before handing the book over.
Joe's eyes widened as he read. He sat in silence for several moments after his eyes had finished crossing the page. "I suppose neither is exactly wrong," he said eventually.
"But how? I can't picture us ever being enemies."
Joe slowly shook his head. "You have always been my friend, but I have not always been yours." Grian wanted to question that, but he let the ensuing silence linger, feeling that Joe would continue when he was ready. Joe sighed. "I told you before that there was truth behind the myths. I haven't always been kind. I can admit that now, even if I couldn't back then. Well, I suppose I knew I wasn't kind; I just didn't care."
Joe closed the book but didn't look at Grian. "It's almost ironic in retrospect," he continued, "but time made me calloused in the beginning. I had grown used to being a creature of rage that demanded frightened respect because there was no other option for me. Friendship was a concept made by and for Players, a concept that was not extended to me — a creature to be feared, so I convinced myself I didn't want it. All I wanted was for them to hurt and to fear me."
He slowly traced the Watcher insignia on the book's cover. "Oh, how I hated the Watchers in the beginning. The Greater were an exception to my rule. They paid me no more mind than they paid any other average Player; that is to say that they were above me and that I was just another thing to Watch. I hated it. Hated them. And so I lashed out."
Joe closed his eyes with a grimace. It was hard for Grian to even imagine such a situation despite understanding the truth behind it. No, he could picture it clearly. He knew Herobrine's legends well. They aligned smoothly with what he was being told now, but the disconnect came when Grian tried to view that myth of old as the same kind soul that sat before him. To view that rageful, violent creature as a perfect reflection of the man who had regret so deeply worn into his features that its scars could only be healed after many lifetimes. They could not be one and the same.
"My disdain for Watchers extended to you when I first met you," Joe continued. "Time travelers though you are, only the Greater go back to the beginning, and you were the first I met beyond them. I expected you to be the same. You weren't. You were worse. You were kind. You called me your friend, and I hated you all the more for it. I despised the idea of attachment, but you wouldn't give up on me. I didn't believe you when you said I could be — would be — better than the monster I was.
"It wasn't until I started to gain followers that things started to change. I entertained them for a while — appearing at their shrines, granting their wishes for power, control, and violence... It wasn't friendship, no. Far from it. But it got me used to having attachments. Taught me that having connections with others wasn't necessarily a bad thing. And so I slowly, slowly, over many years, began to let you in. That likely is where the stories begin to differ, as we became, shall I say, friendly acquaintances, but our followers were still at odds."
"Is that why Xisuma—?" Grian began.
Joe cut him off with a look. The regret and pain were etched so deeply into his face that Grian worried it would rip a hole straight through him. Maybe it already had. "My followers somehow picked up on my loathing of Watchers, and, through some leaps of logic that I will never understand, extended that hate to encompass all creatures of the void. I couldn't bring myself to do anything the first time they laid to death a voidwalker on an altar built for me. The whole experience is still a blur, but I can vividly remember the look of horror you gave me. I wanted to stop them, I did, but it was always too late. By the time the prayers pulled me in, the deed had already been done. I subjected myself to vigilantly witness each execution with the delusional hope that I could someday arrive soon enough to save the Players that had done nothing wrong.
"You were the tipping point, as you often are. The voidwalker they had taken prayed for your protection, and you stepped in to save them. It was the first time you ever called for me. You protected your acolyte, and I dealt with mine the only way I knew how. It took far more bloodshed than I would prefer, even back then, but they eventually got the point. I haven't received even an off-handed prayer in decades, and I haven't had a sacrifice given to me in even longer. If Xisuma's ever had a run-in with the likes of them, word of it never reached me, so I can only hope that means his fear comes from the stories and not from personal experience."
Grian paled as a memory came to mind. "Xelqua saved my life when I was younger," Xisuma had said. He didn't like how easily the ideas lined up.
Joe laughed hollowly and finally looked up at Grian. "What a twisted bit of irony that would be," he said. "When I was trying to come up with ways to make up for what I had let happen, you told me that if I ever met another voidwalker that I should befriend them. It's how I became a Hermit. I took on the mantle of ‘Joe Hills’ ages prior, but following X to Hermitcraft was the first time that name felt more like me than the title of old."
Grian smiled briefly at that as Joe handed the book back. "Speaking of X, I should probably go check on him." Even if Joe was right... Even if all Xisuma was afraid of were the stories...
Joe stood and offered out a hand to help Grian up. "I do hope he's okay. Where'd you get this book, anyway? It's dangerous to have this kind of information just floating around."
"It's Pixl's," Grian answered as they began the long trek to the nearest Nether portal. "Although I'm more worried about the info he has on Evo that he's shared with Xisuma. X probably didn't think too much about it, but if Pearl gives him too many loose ends..."
"It shouldn't really come up unless Pixl shares what he knows with Pearl," Joe reassured. "But I can handle Xisuma as a last resort if I absolutely must, but I'm fairly certain it will never come to that. It seems like something you would've mentioned to me at some point."
"Fair enough. I do have to feel kind of bad for Pixl, though. The poor man is just so genuinely curious, and I could give him so many answers if only it was safe to tell him."
"You'd risk so much for minimal satisfaction at best. He'd have no way of knowing if you were telling the truth, and it would likely drive him mad."
Grian nodded in understanding and agreement as they neared the more commonly traversed section of the Nether roof. He paused before going through Hermitopia's portal. "Hey, Joe?"
"Hm?"
"What happened back then... It's not all your fault." Joe frowned but gave the slightest of nods before crossing through the portal. He was gone by the time Grian followed him through.
Xisuma, his brain was quick to remind him. He sent out a pair of Eyes to Look for the voidwalker and was surprised to find him at his temporary altar. Grian had grown accustomed to brushing off when he felt people enter his hallowed ground, but he hadn't felt anything at all upon Xisuma's arrival. His surprise, however, was quickly answered by the view of Xelqua sitting nearby. Grian raised his Eyes, and Xelqua's head bowed.
Grian realized then that he wouldn't have known how to respond if Xisuma had prayed anything in relation to Herobrine. He didn't even know where to begin, not to mention being in a conflicted headspace after his talk with Joe. He appreciated that his future self could handle that side of things for a while. He closed his Eyes as he approached and sat silently at Xisuma's side. He waited until X glanced at him to break the silence. "You holding up okay?"
"More confused than anything," Xisuma answered. "But otherwise I'm alright. I just... I don't know how Xelqua could be friends with someone, something like that."
"Not if he's anything like the legends," Grian agreed, "but the stories contradict each other, so who knows."
"I just wish I knew what was true. Though I guess it doesn't matter too much as long as Xelqua remains a protector, although my trust in them feels a bit unsteady."
"Yeah," Grian sighed, "I get what you mean." He was terrified of all the threads of information going around, but, unlike Xisuma, he found himself trusting Xelqua more than ever before. If there was anything the last few hours had taught him, it was that he could frequently rely on his future self to cover his tracks and catch him where he stumbled. He would be safe. And if he wasn't? Then he'd figure it out.