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They hadn't seen him in months. Not since he had blown his cover and begged Dom not to do the last heist. The rage alone hearing Brain tell them he was a cop sent in to catch them had fueled so much hatred toward the blonde man, it sometimes turned Dom's stomach. They had listened though, they didn't take down that last truck, because Dom couldn't risk his family. Not if the cops were on to them.
The team waited days for the police to show up to arrest them and when it didn't come not even four months later only then did the family start to relax. Dom was more then happy to see the stress finally leave his sister. To see Jesse stop jumping every time someone knocked on the door. They didn't understand why they hadn't been booked, and a part of them didn't want to know. It took Harry showing up one day to finally learn what happened, why no one hadn't been sent to prison.
“Dom you in?”
“He's under the charger.” Vince yells out from under a hood of a car. Wrist deep in a busted motor that didn't want to work for shit.
“What do you need Harry?” Dom had a few miss givings about the older man. He had known Brian was a cop, had let him into his shop to work and allowed the cop to lie to get into his family. The only thing that saved the man from meeting Dom's fists was the fact he had been blackmailed.
“Heard somethings I thought you might want to know.” Harry had taken to passing along any and all activity about the cops to Dom now. A way of saying sorry for the shit storm he had got them in.
“What about this time?” The last bound on news had been worthless.
“I told you how Tran hadn't been seen for a while ya?”
Dom rolled his eyes, though the man couldn't see that from where Dom was laid out under his car. “Some shit about the bastard being gone for months now.”
“Yea turns out he was in prison for truck jackings.”
Dom was sliding out from under the car so fast the thing wobbled. “Truck jackings?”
The music that had been playing in the shop moments ago cut off at Harry's words. Everyone moves a bit closer towards the older man.
“Yep, turns out a bunch of evidence was found at his place. His finger prints and some of his crews in the cars too.”
That wasn't fucking right. Everyone standing in the shop knew that wasn't right. They had those cars hidden, hadn't even thought about whipping down finger prints. They had been to worried about heading to the cars to clean shop. To nervous about the fact that the cops could have been watching them.
“Stolen TV's and all kinds of other shit. Now the truckers weren't talking or pointing fingers at first but suddenly they were all singing when Tran was booked.”
“You said he was in prison, meaning he's not anymore?” Vince asks with a growl.
“Died two days ago, took a shank to the spine and throat.” There was no love loss between Dom and Tran, and to hear the man was dead and they didn't have to deal with his shit anymore was a reliefe.
“The truck jacking case is now closed according to the cop who came by my shop the other day.”
A collective sigh filled the air. It was finally over, the constant need to look over ones shoulder. The fear of answering a door to see a cop waiting to book them. Dom didn't care how it happened, how evidence was placed and finger prints were found. All he cared about was that now his family was truly safe.
“Thanks for the information.” Dom went to slid back under his car but Harry's foot on his track kept him from moving.
“You're not even going to ask how any of that shit happened man?”
Dom glared. “Why would I?” Dom wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth.
Harry sighed but he moved his foot. “Well, I'll be going then. The rest of the shit I heard is probably worthless to your crew anyways.”
Someone shifted on their feet. “There's more?” Jesse asked.
Harry shrugged. “It depends really, I know no one cares about the guy I'm about to mention.”
Dom's eyes narrowed at that. He knew exactly who Harry was referring too. “We don't care about no fucking cop.”
Harry cut his eyes to Dom. “He ain't no cop anymore. Got fired the day after he blew his cover.”
Dom leaned back and moved to his place under the car. He didn't give a shit if the kid lost his job. He didn't care if the world pissed on Brian O'Connor, but the more he told himself that the more he realized it was a fucking lie.
“Your point?” Letty asked sounding disgusted. “So what if the fucking pig lost his job.”
Harry sighed. “Lost more then his job Letty.” Even against his better judgment Dom was moving out from under the car again. The least he could do was hear the man out.
“What else?” Letty looked towards Dom, he knew she never really cared for Brian. Something about his easy going smile and his closeness to Dom had always pissed her off. Dom was sure there was more to it then that but he never pressed for more information. Letty was fickle about a lot of people.
“Don't kid yourself Dom.” Harry was saying. “The force knew your crew was behind the jackings, but when all evidence was suddenly fingering Tran they couldn't do shit. Now how do you think all signs suddenly were pointing towards a man you hate?”
Dom's eyes narrowed. “Brian.”
Harry nodded. “Brian, don't take a genius to know he planted evidence, moved the cars and most likely paid off the truck drivers.”
“What's your point?” Letty barked out again.
“My point is the cops knew that shit too.” A few of the crew stiffened at that. “No proof of that of course but it didn't stop them from seizing his house, taking his job and his car. Look a friend of mine saw Brian not that long ago, said the kid was looking rough, now if you don't care that's fine but I thought you should know.”
Dom didn't know what to do in this situation. In all cases Brian Spliner had been a lie, they didn't really know the blonde at all. But just because they didn't know the real him didn't mean they couldn't care about him in some way. Dom told Harry bye before he was once again sliding under his car.
He was at a loss, the information, any of it wasn't something he had been expecting. The case had been closed, Brian had framed Tran for their bad judgments and in the end the only one who lost anything had been the blonde. With a sigh Dom climbed out from under his car and stood. With the knowledge he was just given he couldn't focus on working on the thing. Slowly looking around the room he took in his family. Jesse was still frozen in place even ten minutes after Harry had left. Letty unsurprising was back to working on a customers car like the conversation hadn't just happened.
Leon was making a poor attempt to work and Mia who had been doing homework on the couch in the corner of the shop was staring off into space. The most shocking thing was Vince, the man was standing in front of the unfinished Supra frowning at the thing like it would tell him something important.
Brian and Vince had thrown punches more then they actually talked, but to see the worry on his face was like a kick to the gut. It would seem some part of his best friend had actually cared for the cop. Even when the two had been wailing on one another.
“Should we check on him?” Vince's question made Dom tense. He hadn't expected it, hadn't even thought Vince of all people would care what was happening to Brian. It was just as shocking as the worried frown on his face.
“You can't be serious.” Letty barks out, she tosses the wrench in her hand into the toolbox by her work station. Mia finally losses the dazed look in her eyes at the loud sound of metal meeting metal with to much force.
“You know I don't say shit I don't mean Letty.” Vince barks back.
“He was a lying fucking pig! You even accused him of being one, and now because he lost his fucking job you want to act like you give a shit?”
Vince shrugged, his face a mask of ( I don't give a fuck what you think.) “He gave up a lot for us Letty, it's not like he would even have to see us if we did check in on him.”
Dom suddenly understood what Vince meant. They could check on Brian without the man being the wiser. It wouldn't be to difficult, Harry probably knew where he was and if he didn't they would just have to find out for themselves.
“Who gives a fuck. Kids probably lived a pampered fucking life his entire existent, now he can have a taste of the real world.”
Mia was glaring at Letty's back at this point, and Jesse quite Jess who didn't start trouble or pull to much attention to himself suddenly looked murderous.
“That's bullshit.” Letty's head whips impossibly fast towards the youngest. Dom is looking on shocked at the heat behind the kids voice.
“Excuse me?” Leon shifts closer towards Jesse at the sound of anger in Letty's voice. The most shocking thing? Jesse doesn't back down, a kid who use to jump at raised voice's was now looking Letty dead in the eye and he wasn't even tense.
“I'm positive Brain hasn't had an easy life.” Letty huffs at that. “Don't do that!” Jesse shouts. “Don't take what I fucking say and act like it's meaningless. Have any of you seen Brian shirtless?”
Dom thought back to all the hot days they had spent together in the shop. The heat this place built up had all the men and Letty walking around shirtless or in Letty's case in a short tank top. Dom remembers one day commenting on the fact it was over one hundred and twenty in the shop and Brian had his shirt on. He remembers the sweat that had soaked through the dark material. How flushed Brian's cheeks had been. How the sweat had weighted down his blonde curls, but he never removed his shirt.
“So what?” Letty growls out.
“I've seen Brian shirtless.” Jesse's once shouting voice was suddenly quite. “I came into the garage on night to get something, Brian had been working on the Supra and he wasn't wearing his shirt. I didn't think anything of it at first, it was hot but he had headphones in and didn't hear me so when I got close I saw them.”
“What did you see?” Mia asks, voice soft and soothing a tone she took on when Jesse was feeling stressed.
“Scars, dozens upon dozens of scars. On his back and his chest, like someone had beat him over and over again with a whip or a belt.”
Jesse's hand falls to his own back then. The kid didn't have many scars four at the most, but the ones he did carry were large enough and had been deep enough everyone who saw them knew he had been abused. Letty had actually fallen silent at that, but she still didn't look like she wanted anyone to care or worry about Brain.
“There's lots of ways to get scars Jesse.” Letty says folding her arms across her chest.
“Not those and not that many.” Jess suddenly looks at Dom. “Could you check on him? I know everyone is mad at him, but I like Brain. He listened to me and actually understood the shit coming out of my mouth.” Jesse looked guilty then. “I'm not even mad at him Dom. We were breaking the law, it was his job to take us in and he didn't do that.”
Dom sighed, that was the only thing that ever really threw him about Brain. The man had been a cop, a cop sent in to find the people behind the truck jackings and take them in. Instead the kid had chased Dom down after race wars and blew his cover. Dom had said some nasty shit to the guy, had called him every name he could possibly think of. It hadn't slowed Brian down any. He had fought and begged them not to pull the heist, had warned them about the truckers arming themselves. Mia had slapped him and even went so far to spit in his face.
Brian took it all, like he expected it. Like he had only been waiting for them to attack him.
Dom didn't understand why?
“Let his family take care of his ass.” Letty growls out before she turns back towards her car. Jesse stomps off in a huff and slams the office door behind him.
Dom did the only thing he could do then, he moved back towards his car and got to work. Trying not to dwell on the fact that Brian had scars, or how he had given up so much for the team. He told himself Brain O'Connor was a liar who betrayed him and his trust.
*-*-*-*-*-*
A week after Harry showed up no one had mentioned Brian again, but the tension was high. Jesse was snappish with everyone, Letty most of all. Vince was glaring more then normal, Leon was his same quite self but Dom had caught him frowning towards the Supra a few times. Mia often got a sad look in her eyes, something Dom could only call regret.
The family had been sitting down for dinner one night when Jesse slammed a stack of papers on the table. The first words that popped out in big black bold letters was the name Brian O'Connor.
“I now know plenty about Brian.” Jesse says pointing towards the papers. The file was so thick Dom knew it took the kid days to dig all that up. “Eight year old Brain O'Connor calls the police about his mom not waking up. When police arrive they find Mrs. O'Connor in the bathtub dead from an overdose. Needle still in her arm and shit.”
Dom glowered at the thought of a young Brian finding his mother dead, even worse was the way behind it.
“The only thing I could find on his dad was he died four years before his wife. After his mom dies Brian is shipped off to several foster homes. From the shit I dug up he was never in a home for more then a month at a time until he was eleven. He was placed in the care of Michel Simmons and his wife Tara Simmons.”
Jesse stops for a moment and glances away as if trying to collect himself. “They had him for two years, when social services did their check-ins everything seemed fine. Then Brian got a new case worker who apparently took their job seriously because on the first visit they noticed, how they wrote it, Brian coward and flinched from touch.”
“No.” Mia whispers sadly.
“According to the report I read the visits became more regular, but one day the social worker did a surprise visit, they walked in on both Michel and Tara Simmons beating Brian with belt's till he was bloody.”
Vince gives a snarl, one Dom was all to aware he was doing himself.
“Once they were arrested and Brian's injuries were taken care off they questioned Brian.” Jesse's voice hitched and he gagged making Letty jerk back and Leon lean forward worriedly.
“Jess?” Dom asks trying to catch the kids attention.
“They were selling him to the highest paying customer Dom.” Jesse whispers. “They had been doing it for years with the kids they fostered and no one was the wiser, but Brian was the only one to talk. They would sell him to people who wanted to use him.”
Dom raised his hand to get Jesse to stop talking. This was to much to take in, not just the fact Brian had been abused, but to learn he was also sold off from person to person like some fucking toy? How the hell did that kid go through life with such a huge smile on his face after living through something like that?
“He was reported missing after that, he took off from the hospital when no one was looking.” Jesse took a deep breath to calm himself. “He didn't show up again in any system I looked through until he was sixteen and was taken to jail for boosting and selling stolen cars. He was their till he was eighteen and entered the police academy after and we know what happened from there.”
Jesse sighs before glancing towards Letty who for once looked as worried as everyone was feeling. “To your statement about letting his family take care of him, Brian doesn't have one.”
The kids blue eyes look towards Dom. “So please could someone check on him? He lost everything he worked for, for us the least we can do is check in on him.”
*-*-*-*-*-*
It was two months after Jesse laid Brian's life out for everyone to see before anyone could find Brian. The only reason they had even found him was because of Hector, the man had wondered up one night after a race looking stricken.
“Yo Dom!” Hector yelled out as the crew were headed back towards their cars. Vince was the first one to pause at the mans shout with a raised brow.
“What's up man?” Dom asks addressing the guy.
“Snowman ran with your crew for a while yea?” Hector asks as he reaches the bunch. As far as anyone was aware Brian had only been Brian a racer that was running with Dom's family for a time before he vanished. Dom had wanted it to stay that way too, they didn't need anyone to know they had let a cop into the folds of the racing scene.
“Yea.” Dom says suddenly nervous, they had been looking for Brian everywhere with no luck. Dom had been thinking the man left town before they could check on him.
“Man, look my cousin saw your boy a week ago.” Jesse visibly brightened at this, the kid had been a wreck the longer it took to find Brian.
“Where was he?” Jesse asks shifting from foot to foot like an excited puppy, but Hector gave the kid a sad frown which made the Jesse freeze up. Leon moves towards Jess and places a calming hand on his shoulder.
“That's just it, you know the slums right?” Dom nodes slowly. Everyone knew about the slums, fuck not even the police liked to travel to that part of town it was such a shit hole. The crime rate there was so high it was avoided like the plague.
“See my boy had to go through that part of town the other night and as he was waiting for a light to change he saw Brian.” Hector pulls out his phone, scrolls through a few pictures before handing the thing over to Dom.
The bigger man only just keeps the gasp from leaving his lips. Brian looked like hell, to pale, to skinny, dark circles under his eyes that Dom could make out from the distance the photo was taken. The guy wasn't walking with the same proud straight back he once did. His head wasn't held high, and that trade mark Hollywood smile was gone.
“Now we don't make it a thing to stalk someone yea? But my boy called me up because hell snowman was a cool guy. So we find him again the next night and follow him around a bit, man homes the kids living in some whore house. The places looks like it should be condemned its so nasty.”
Dom slides to another picture of Brian entering some ran down apartment, and like Hector said the place looked like it need to be knocked down and burned. The people alone standing out in front of the building look like the type to stab your ass as you walked by for shit and giggles. Dom hands the phone back to Hector after memorizing the number on Brian's apartment.
“I don't know the story about why the guy hasn't been around but I heard you have been asking around for him.”
“He got into some trouble is all.” Dom says not going to elaborate. In all sense Brian had gotten into some trouble. Trouble he could have avoided by turning them in, but he hadn't. He also hadn't shown back up either, because Dom had ordered him to stay away. Had threatened his life if he ever saw his face around his parts again.
Brian's blue eyes had clouded with Dom's words but he had nodded all the same and with a mask of blankness on his face had walked away. Just to turn around the next day to have his whole world turned upside down.
“Well I hope that helps man, because shit. I've known some people who had walked into that part of town and not come back out unless it was in a body bag.”
“W-What?” Jesse asks voice breathless. “What do you mean? What does he mean Dom?”
Dom ruffles the kids hair to calm him just as Leon squeezes his shoulder to do the same.
“It's fine Jess.” Dom says soothingly. “We'll go check on Brian okay?”
Jesus, Dom suddenly wished the kid had left town. At least he wouldn't had ended up there.
“You'll bring him home you mean.” Jess says. “You bring him home because he's our family Dom, we don't turn our backs on family.”
Family.
A word Dom had always lived by. You look after your family, you keep them close and you help them when help is needed. A few months back Dom hadn't thought Brian deserved that title. He had been a lying pig were Dom was concerned. Brian Spliner had been a lie, but Brian O'Connor had given up more then anyone in this family ever had to, to protect the ones they loved.
And now that Dom had all the dirty facts, he knew. He just fucking knew Brian loved them, he had done everything in his power to protect them. And Dom turned his back on him, hadn't heard him out after he outed himself as a cop. He only took the information that was good to him and his family and kicked Brian to the curve.
“Look we followed him a round off and on, but like clock work Brian returns home around four A.M. It was a long couple of nights we spent trying to figure out what was going on. Most night when he comes home he's beat to hell. Blood and god knows what else on him and I'm going to say the blood is his most of the time cause the other night he stumbled into his place holding a rag to his neck. Thing was stained red man.”
Mia's eyes are impossibly round at Hector's words. Those dark orbs were shifting around the group almost helplessly. Dom knew Mia felt guilty for slapping Brian, even spitting on him. They had a long talk about it one night when he found his sister alone in the living room looking at the group picture they had all took together.
It wasn't only because she had attacked him, Mia had been upset the man had never moved towards any of her advances. Which she had finally came forward and told Dom about. Which meant the hurt my sister and I'll kill you talk he had given Brian had been pointless. Mia had wanted him as an out, but Brian hadn't wanted her. They still had been close friends though and Dom knew it had hurt his sister to find out Brian Spliner had been a lie.
“Is he getting jumped?” Letty asks, Dom can't really place her tone of voice but it had lost the sting of hate from months back when they had learned of his childhood. Dom assumed she too felt guilty, but more for her idea of Brian then anything she had done.
“Nah, at first I thought that was the case so I had another cousin follow him one night.” Dom rolled his eyes, Hector had a lot of cousin's. “He's fucking fighting man, straight up getting the shit kicked out of him most nights. My boy thought it was because he needed to let off some steam, kinda like the races, but nope he's doing that shit so he can get paid a little cash and not get booted out of his place.”
“What the fuck?” Vince says.
“Look all I'm saying is, kid looks fucking dead on his feet. He was a bit on the skinny side when he was here but now? Kid probably weights a buck ten at most. I would have pulled him out of that place myself but we're not that close, I didn't think he would have reacted well to that.”
Jesse is practically apart of Leon he's leaning back against the guy so heavily.
“I weigh one hundred and forty pounds, are you saying he weighs less then that?” Dom's eyes scans Jesse's small frame. Jess was only two inches shorter then Brian and they had been close in size when Brian had been around. The guy only had maybe ten pounds on Jesse and to even imagine Brian weighting less then one thirty was nauseating.
“Look it's not like I physically weighed the guy but he's smaller then you man by a lot.”
“Shit.” Jess says closing his eyes. “Can someone please go get Brian now?”
*-*-*-*-*-*
Dom and Vince has been sitting outside Brian's apartment glaring at the thing for the past three hours. They were in the most shit car they could get from the garage not trusting to use one of the good ones. The last thing they wanted to do was roll through this part of town in a flashy car. They had even gone so far and loaded up with the shotgun and pistol and set out towards Brian.
It was early in the morning and Dom wasn't one to be afraid but this place was not somewhere he wanted to be at this hour. It was to dark on the street, it left little help to see if someone was trying to sneak up on you. Vince and Dom had witnessed three drug deals and six prostitutes being picked up in front of Brian's building in the last hour.
It didn't help they hadn't seen a cop for miles since they came to this part of town. The men in blue really did avoid this place, because the people living here would put a bullet in their heads sooner then risk prison time or even getting within close proximity to a cop. Dom didn't even want to think about what they would do to Brian if they learned he once was one.
Dom wasn't so sure about Hector's time line a first, but four o'clock on the dot Vince stiffens next to Dom. The bigger man follows his friends line of sight and finally after months of looking he see's Brian. Seeing him in person was worse then the pictures, because the kid really was to fucking skinny. His cheekbones were sharp, his arms to small. They couldn't tell much else from the over sized clothes he was wearing but it wasn't hard to notice. It also wasn't hard to miss the fresh bruises and blood on Brian's skin. Vince made a move for the door handle as soon as he sees the guy, but it's only Dom's quick hands that keep him from chasing the guy down.
“Wait till he gets into his apartment.” Dom demands.
“What the fuck for?”
Dom cuts his eyes to his friend. “He can't run if he's in his place, he's three stories up so the only exit is the front door. This fucking place doesn't have no damn fire escape, it's laying on the damn ground.”
Vince nods and they wait fifteen minutes before they move out of the car and up the stairs. They get a few curious looks from a few guys smoking weed in the hallway, but one look at the shot gun in Vince's hands and they quickly mind their own business.
Only when they are in front of apartment three ten did Dom finally make enough noise to make himself known. He pounds on the front door and glares at the thing when it almost caves in on itself. This fucking door wouldn't keep anyone out, a damn toddler could kick it in.
It take's five minutes for Brain to open the door, long enough that at first Dom wasn't sure he was going to. He knew he wouldn't answer his door in a place like this at four A.M. But when the door finally does open Brian flinches so violently when he see's them standing on the other side you could have sworn they shot the guy. Those once bright blue eyes were dull and now staring at them so widely Dom was suddenly worried they would roll out of his head.
Brian doesn't move for a time, he just stares like he wasn't really sure he was seeing Dom and Vince in front of him. Then Vince shifts on his feet and Brian's eyes fall to the gun in his hand and the kids just deflates at the sight of it. He has a look in his eyes that Dom could only call reliefe. That reliefe scares the hell out of Dom, no one he cared about should look at a gun and feel calm about it.
“Just don't shoot me in the face yea?” Brian says voice low and scratchy from what Dom was hoping the lack of using it.
“We aren't here to shot your ass Buster.” Vince growls, the gun in his hand moves ever so slightly, Brian's eyes track it.
“That's to bad.” The guy whispers before turning on his bare feet and moves inside the apartment. The words send a chill down Dom's spine. Did Brian want to die?
Vince quickly sets to follow Brian, but Dom doesn't miss the fact that he removes the shells from the shotgun and places them in his pocket. It would seem his friend had heard the almost pleading need in Brian's voice as if he was almost begging them to shot him.
The place doesn't look any better on the inside. The walls were smoke stained and dark, and it was clear it wasn't a coat of paint that made the walls that color. It was years of people smoking and doing god knows what else in the house. Dom was suddenly worried about what kinda germs this place was teaming with.
A ratty ass couch that looked like it had been pulled from a dump sat in the middle of the living room with a thin torn sheet and pillow on it. What Dom could see of the inside of the bathroom from where he stood in the living room was something out of a horror film. The possible once white walls were orange with mildew and all kinds of disgusting build up. The mirror over the sink was so old you could hardly catch a reflection in the thing.
Brian shuffles painful slow into the kitchen and pulls a hot corona out of a box on the counter and take a long pull. Dom's mouth twitches at that, he loved himself a nice brew but a hot one was not appealing. It wasn't until Brian finished the thing off and threw it into the trash did he realize the guy didn't even have a refrigerator.
Brian is already chugging down another beer by the time Dom looks back towards him. There is a mess of gauze wrapped around his neck, from what only Dom could guess was the bleeding wound Hector had told them about. A large bruise on his cheek and a split lip. The bags alone under his eyes stood out so much Dom thought for a moment they were shiners.
Once that beer was gone Brian made a grab for another but Vince dumps the gun on the cracked counter and pulls the thing out of Brian's hand.
“I think your good man.” Dom raises a brow at that until he steps close enough to get a whiff of Brian. It smelled like the guy had bathed in a bath of tequila.
Brian looks towards the beer then back towards Vince before grabbing another out of the box. Vince snarls and grabs that one as well and in his anger he tosses the ones in his hands into the sink so forcefully they shatter on impact. Dom isn't really sure what happens next but Brian is in motion then, jerking back so fast from them that he slams into a wall and slides down it. He cries out for a moment before he slaps a hand over his mouth and curls in on himself.
Dom is standing there dumbfounded. In the months he had known Brian he had never seen the guy react that way. Had never seen him cower and jump at any loud noises but now to see Brian hunched over his own knees that he had pulled up to his chest Dom was wondering how he had missed it.
The trauma the kid hid behind bright smiles and playful jokes.
“Brian?” The sound of Dom speaking makes the blonde tense up so badly they hear the guys spine crack.
Vince moves first and it's both shocking and telling when he crouches in front of Brian and slides his hand through the guys hair. Brian flinches and whines at the touch but he doesn't pull away if anything he goes more ridged. Something Dom didn't really think was possible.
“Hey man calm down okay.” Vince says in low tones, a soothing hint to his voice Dom had never heard before.
Dom moves forward and mimics Vince's stance, each on either side of Brian. Not boxing him in but close enough they could easily grab him if he made a run for it. Dom didn't think that would happen though. Not with how bad Brian was shaking and how hard and fast his breathing was. Neither men had ever had to deal with a panic attack before but they both knew that was what was happening if the gasps for breath were anything to go by.
“Calm down Bri.” Vince says sliding his fingers through Brian's dirty hair again.
It takes a while, twenty minutes at the most but Brian slowly starts to relax enough to uncurl. His legs sprawl out in front of him as he unwinds, his head which had been touching his chest dropped back to bang against the wall behind him. Those blue eyes were shut tight.
“Why are you here if it's not to shoot me?” Brian finally asks. He doesn't open his eyes though, he continues to lean back his head tilted towards the ceiling. A ceiling that was the same dark disgusting color as the walls.
“We came to bring you home.” Dom finally says. And oh, Brian doesn't know how to handle those words because the guy goes impossibly still again. So still Dom wasn't even sure Brian was breathing.
“This is my home.” Brian says as he finally opens his eyes. It was then Dom and Vince both notice the dilated pupils. The things were so round it was almost impossible to see the vivid blue of Brian's eyes. Vince grabs the guys face and turns his head towards him to take a better look at Brian's face. The dazed look that Vince gets in return has the man growling and cursing.
“You high Brian?” Vince snarls out. Dom's eyes slowly look over the kitchen and living room. He didn't see any drugs out and all the cabinets were hanging open and empty. Empty of everything, food, dishes. Anything someone would need in a kitchen. Any substance Brian would need to keep well and healthy.
Brian gives a hollow laugh that makes both Vince and Dom cringe. “High, drunk. I'm a bit of both.” It wasn't till now did Dom noticed the slurred speech. Brian's words were much slower then normal, more drawn out. Like he couldn't get his tongue to form the right words.
“What the fuck did you take?” Vince asks giving the man a slight shake when Brian's eyes start to close.
“Today?” Brian asks in a dazed voice. He gives another slow blink.
“What did you take Brian?” Dom snaps out. It was clear whatever it was it was resent, most likely when Vince and Dom had been waiting in the car before heading up.
“Dilaudid.” Brian mumbles. Vince and Dom are both cursing now. Vince grabs at Brain's arms and sure enough when he holds the to pale to skinny limb for Dom to check he can see the needle mark. Along with the old healing ones.
Dom stomps towards the bathroom and flings the mirrored door open. His heart stops at the amount of shit in the cabinet. The kitchen held no food, the living room was bare besides the fucking disgusting cough, sheet and pillow but his medicine cabinet was fucking stocked.
Dom pulls a grocery bag of the bathroom floor and starts clearing out the shelves. He looks towards the names on the bottles every once in a while. Vicodin, Demerol, morphine and even fucking Oxycontin. They was some less harmful shit like Advil and over the counter allergy meds but it was the glass bottles one half empty he found in the back that made his blood run cold. He tosses the Dilaudid into the bag and ties it up.
Its only when he turns to stomp out of the bathroom does he see the syringe in the trash can.
“How much did you take Brian?” Vince was shouting when he makes his way back into the kitchen. Brian's eyes were moving slowly around the room, not really tracking anything and if the slack look on his face was anything to go by he wasn't really hearing Vince either.
“Get him up.” Dom says as he grabs the shotgun off the counter. “We're taking his ass home now.”
Dom couldn't feel more sick to his stomach if he tried. The weight loss, the dump he was living in, the fact he was fighting to earn money and keep this shit hole of a home over his head was hard enough to deal with. But to learn he had turned to taking drugs to escape the shit storm that was his life was a kick to the teeth Dom just couldn't swallow.
What the hell had he condemned Brian to when he turned his back on him?
*-*-*-*-*
Brian was nothing but dead weight in Vince's arms. The buster hadn't said a word as Vince carried him out of the apartment, and he hadn't even let a breath of sound out when Vince sat in the car with him in his lap.
The dark haired man had been to worried to place him in the backseat on his back or side. To afraid all the alcohol mixed with fucking drugs would have Brian hurling and choking to death on his own vomit. Dom was a ball of rage as he hurried home. His dark eyes tracking towards Brian every few moments to check if he was still breathing as he drove.
The bag Dom had thrown into the back of the car with the guns rattled with each turn. A reminder of why Brian was so limp in Vince's arms. Vince could feel the thin bones digging into this stomach and neck from how Brian was laying against him. Each inhale of breath a horrifying realization on how much weight the blonde had lost.
He had been all strong lean muscles when they had first met, but now? The kid was nothing more then a scrawny beaten, drunken, drugged up mess. Vince had said Brian was a cop from the get go. He had fought and bad mouthed him every chance he got. The jealousy he always felt when Dom and Mia fawned over Brian had always pissed Vince off.
Vince was quick to anger, quick to pop off at the mouth and seeing Brian smile so brightly at everyone but him made him angry. Angry at first because he thought Brain had wanted Mia, but when he learned Brian had never been interested in Dom's sister in such a way it had been a reliefe. He was only stunned when he realized he was only calmed by that fact because that meant Brian wasn't taken.
He had stupidly mistook his jealousy because Vince thought he wanted Mia, but to learn once the guy was gone from their lives that it had been Brain he wanted. Well it had been hard to comprehend, not only because Brian was gone in the wind, but also because Vince had spent most of his time pounding on the guy. He truly hadn't been shocked when Brian had outed himself as a cop. The only shocking thing he learned was what Brian had done for them. What he had given up and lost, and what he had to suffer through as a child.
Vince never had a caring family until Dom. Sure his family was around but they weren't close but they had never laid a hand on Vince. Never struck him or yelled. They just hadn't been around. Dom showed him what a real family was. After meeting Brian it had been easy to assume he had a great loving family with his easy smile and joy for life. Then to learn he hadn't had that, and yet could smile like that had been amazing. Now though...
Vince's eyes roam over the slack pale bruised face. Now Vince wasn't so sure Brian knew how to smile. After living though what he did as a kid, getting popped and going to jail the kid had climbed out on top and made something of himself. Then because of them, because Brian cared for Dom and their family he had given all that up. He may not had intended to loss his job, his house or his car, but that was what happened.
Now he was, Vince didn't know what yet. He had sounded so disappointed when Vince told him he hadn't showed up to his place to shot and kill him. So sad about the fact that Vince had been terrified, still was, because how the fuck do you fix something like that?
How do you make someone want to live?
*-*-*-*-*-*
Getting out of the car proved to be a bit more difficult then getting in. It had been easy to slid into the seat with Brian tucked against his chest. Trying to climb out even when the guy weighed so little almost resulted in them both slamming against the ground.
Once he was steady on his feet Vince followed Dom into the house. It was six A.M by now but as soon as Vince walked through the doors with Brian curled around his chest looking half dead a collective gasp filled the crowded living room. Vince had hoped everyone had been asleep upon their return but it would seem by the tired looks in everyone eyes that no one had slept.
“Oh god Brian?!” Mia was rushing towards Vince and Brian in seconds. Her dark knowing eyes took in the pale parlor of Brian's skin. The lack of weight and the numerous amount of injuries. The smell of pure alcohol and the greasy strands of his hair.
“Mia.” Dom barks out, his voice harsher then he intended with his worry. “What happens when you mix Dilaudid and alcohol?”
“W-what?” Mia blinks slowly, then she's grabbing Brian's arm and checking for track marks like Dom and Vince had.
“Oh Brian.” Mia glances between Dom and Vince. “Do you know how much he took?”
Dom and Vince shake their heads no. Brian was to light but standing in the doorway with the guy unconscious wasn't idea. So while Dom riffled through the bag Vince moves towards the couch and sits with Brian still tucked safely in his arms. Letty raises an eyebrow at that but the curious look fades away when she sees just how bad Brian looks.
“Jesus.” She whispers before turning away. Jesse is just standing there, to stunned to speak. To worried about how horrible Brian really looks to move. Leon is a silent pillar of comfort at Jesse's back, but even his normal calm stoic face was tense with worry.
Mia was looking at the glass bottle Dom handed to her while Vince got comfortable.
“He didn't take all of this in one night that's for sure.” Mia says. “His heart would have stopped already if he took this much in one go.”
Mia holds up and finger to tell everyone to wait as she rushes up stairs and returns with her bag she takes to class with her every day. She pulls out a stethoscope and places it around her neck before pulling out a blood pressure cuff and wraps it around Brian's arm.
Everyone watches as she frowns down at the reading on the dial before she moves to listen to Brian's heart beat. The room is full of a tense silence as Mia slowly works. She pulls out a pin light and checks the reaction of Brian's pupils before pulling back.
“His heart rate and blood pressure are low. Not life threatening, it's not uncommon for that to happen when you mix those two things. He's breathing is a bit labored but that could be from the fluid I heard in his lungs.”
Mia smiles sadly as she brushes a dirty curl out of Brian's closed eyes. “We'll just have to watch him for the next few hours to make sure his heart rate doesn't drop anymore.”
“You don't think we should take him to the hospital do you?” Jesse says, finally getting the nerve to speak.
“No, and I'm hoping we won't have to take him at all. If we did it's possible they would take him back and we wouldn't hear anything. We aren't related to Brian, we would get no news on what was happening.”
He could slip away like he did all those years ago, Vince thinks. It would be so easy for Brian to move through a hospital unaware and disappear into the night. If he could do it as an eleven year old boy who was nearly beat to death. He could definitely do it as a twenty four year old with nothing left to lose.
“So we let him sleep it off?” Vince asks. Hearing Brian breathing the whole way here had been comforting to an extent, but hearing Mia tell them like it is put Vince more at ease.
“Yes, He'll probably been out for a good while, so we might as well make him comfortable.”
No one dared to say a thing when Vince stood and carried Brian down stairs. There was no way in hell he was letting Brian sleep on the couch after seeing the monstrosity he had been using as a bed. And if Vince slipped into the bathroom he added to the basement and gave Brian a bath then no one was the wiser.
Getting Brian clean when he was nothing more then a rag doll had been challenging. Seeing the scars that littered his chest and back had been worse, but seeing the new wounds and discoloration of his skin from everything to his face to his feet had been hard to swallow. Vince made sure to keep the water away from the bandages on his throat the best he could.
If Brian would have done his job like he was suppose to he could be at home. His proper home, making good money, feeding himself and having a good nights rest. Instead he had turned his back to his badge and got sideswiped by life. Vince didn't know why Brian didn't go and find a proper job, but once Brian finally woke up and was coherent Vince would ask the questions that had been tormenting him.
Once he had Brian clean he dressed him in a pair of his sweats and a soft long sleeve shirt. Vince had noticed since entering the basement that Brian had shivered in his sleep several times, so once he was dressed he tucked Brian into bed.
The older male hurried his way through a shower. Being in those apartments had left his clothes, hair and skin smelling awful. The hallway had smelled of vomit and garbage. Not to mention the scent of weed and something dead. Brian's apartment hadn't smelled wonderful in the least but it had been better then the shit out in the halls.
After dressing himself he crawled into bed next to the blonde. He didn't want to sleep on the couch either, and if he was honest with himself being close to Brian and hearing his breathing relaxed him. If Brian flipped out about waking up next to Vince in bed with him he was okay with that. Brian deserved to throw a fucking fit.
Vince couldn't say he was the type of man to cuddle. Several women he had dated had bitched about that fact. But when Brian finally moved and showed some sign of life besides breathing as he curled himself around Vince you bet your ass the older man cuddled the guy closer to his chest.
The almost sad sigh Brian hummed out as he slid impossibly close to Vince pulled at the older mans heart. He prided himself on being a hard ass, but to see someone like Brian so hurt and down right broken take comfort in Vince in his sleep was like a kick to the balls.
That how they slept. Brian warm and safe and unaware curled around Vince. Vince slept peacefully with Brian caged protectively against his chest. It maybe a drug induced sleep, but Vince was still glad none the less Brian was resting. At least with Brian pressed so tightly against his chest he could feel the guys heart beat and hear his breathing.
They could deal with the fall out of practically kidnapping Brian tomorrow.
*-*-*-*-*-*
Vince woke the moment Brian went stiff around him, the guys once steady breathing hitched as he took in his new surroundings and the body under him. Vince made it a point to stay still, he needed to give Brian a few moments to catch up on what was happening because the older man wasn't sure how much of last night Brian remembered.
Brian never pulled away, be it from the pain his body was surly in or fear Vince wasn't sure but when he spoke his voice was so hallow and dead sounding that the fear from the night before came rushing back.
“You should have shot me.” Like the night before Vince notices how bad Brian's voice sounds. How choked out and painful the words seemed to be for him.
“I didn't want to shot you.” And he hadn't. If he had felt safe enough he wouldn't even had brought that gun into Brian's place, but what Brian called a home was nothing more then a free range hell hole. Brian wiggles as if to move away then hisses before falling still against Vince's chest.
“Guess I couldn't possibly ask you to do me that kindness.”
Vince's eyes swing to his bottom of the stairs. His blue eyes lock with Dom's dark ones and he knows Dom was hearing what Vince was. The ex-cop did want to die, or at least in some extent.
“You can't die.” It's not the words Vince truly wants to say, hell he wasn't even sure what he wanted to say but the idea of Brian being dead made him want to vomit. Dom's eyes are moving over Brian as he lays still. Vince knows what he see's, knows Brian's blue eyes are hollow and empty and that was wrong. So fucking wrong because six months back the kids eyes had been full of life.
Brian gives a sharp almost manic laugh as he finally pulls away. Vince could tell as he drops his back against the headboard he's in pain, those blonde eyebrows were draw up so tight.
“Did we miss the fact that I'm a fucking adult and if I wanna die I have that right?”
Vince keeps his anger in check as he sits up in bed and turns towards Brian. Dom finally moves forward, Brian's eyes track the movement as Dom drops down on the end of the bed. The guy is stiff again but at the moment he didn't look like he was going to bolt. Not that he would get far, Vince was only inches from him and Dom was at the end of the bed, but on the off chance he did get passed them he wouldn't make it out of the door. Because from were Vince was seated he could see Leon at the top of the stairs leaning against the wall just outside of the door.
Dom's idea Vince was sure.
“You don't have that right.” Dom growls out, Brian flinches then that pained look turned to rage.
“The fuck I don't!” Brian screams out. Then the guy is on his feet, wobbling before he catches himself on the nightstand. “I have every right to do what the fuck I damn well please! You don't get to tell me what the fuck I should do with my life.”
Vince moves to stand himself when Dom rockets to his feet at Brian's shouting. He knew Dom wouldn't throw punches but it didn't mean Brian wouldn't attempt to start a fight. The rage coming off the guy was almost tangible.
“We found you fucking high as a kit and drunk off your ass Brian!” Dom shouts back. “So it's very fucking apparent someone needs to tell your ass what to do!”
“Fuck you!” Brain rushes forward and shoves Dom back, but the lack of weight and the obvious lack of energy and pain the Buster was in had Dom only stepping back a pace. “I spent my life having people telling me what to fucking do! My fucking drug addict whore of a mother.”
Another shove, Vince slowly shifts around the bed. He doesn't want to draw Brian's eyes towards him. He needed to stay out of the line of focus if thing took a worse turn then a shouting match and shoving.
“Foster parent after fucking foster parent!” With each words Brian's voice gets louder sounds more broken. “Then those sick fucks I was placed with for years!”
Both Vince and Dom look sick at that, and Brian must notice because he give another sharp dead laugh. “Know about that shit do you? Do you have any fucking idea how hard it was not to kill myself then?”
Vince flinches, not only because it was apparently not the first time Brian wanted to die, but to learn the first time it had happened he was an eleven year old boy was heart breaking. Vince dimly see's Leon twitch at Brian's words, Dom and Vince hadn't told anyone they thought Brian wanted to die but if Leon caught on to it, it was just one more person to help him.
“They sold me off like a fucking whore Dom!” Brian's scream cracks as he shoves Dom back another step. “They could do anything they fucking wanted as long as the pay was good. Needed to let off some steam and beat a kid into submission? Five hundred dollars. Like to watch a kid bathe for your own sick pleasure seven hundred dollars.”
Each word was loud, but they were controlled as he listed off the pricing his once foster family charged for him. Vince silently wished Brian would stop talking, because the sound of his voice telling them about his childhood was worse then reading about it. So much worse then Jesse's sad eyes as he showed them what he found. Hearing it second hand had left out a lot, but hearing Brian speak about the actual acts he was put through was sickening.
“Want to rape a pretty blonde child? One thousand dollars.” Dom moves quickly then, grabbing hold of Brian's shoulders as the guy screams in Dom's face. The hold wasn't meant to hurt Brian Vince was sure but with Brian's high anxiety and rage he jerks back and slams his fist into Dom's face. Vince moves around the bed as Dom slams back against the wall, he places himself in between the two. Because if it came to blows Dom would win hands down with how weak and small Brian was.
That one punch already seemed to sap what little energy Brian had, but he didn't stop he kept on shouting even when Vince calls his name.
“You want to know the fucking kicker?” Brian asks, his voice was losing some of it's heat but it was still to loud and to hollow. “It wasn't even men who paid to fuck me because my foster parents didn't allow men to touch me sexually.”
Brian is suddenly laughing, loud and wild. Manic. “They had some shit morals, like taking a dick would have been worse then a fucking grown woman having her damn way with me. They shoved all likes of fucking pills down my throat when I was needed for one of those sessions.”
Brian doesn't even pause to take a breath before the next stream of words follow.“I can't even get it up for a women.” Brian yells with a tragic laugh. “And once that shit was done and they were in jail I thought I was finally fucking free, but those fucking social service asshole had another house lined up. They were going to ship me off again! So I fucking left, because no one has the fucking right to tell me how to live my fucking life anymore!”
“You're trying to kill yourself Brian!” Dom screams when he's finally able to cut off Brian's ramblings. “Your drinking and taking drugs that are lethal together.”
“Who the fuck cares!” Brian shouts back. “What the fuck does it matter if I die? What the fuck do I have to want to stay in this shit world? I gave up my fucking life for this family because I didn't want to break up something I never got!”
Brian gasps then his face paling impossibly white. Vince moves then steadying the smaller male when he sways and stumbles. “I don't have anything Dom, I don't have anything to want to live for. I don't have a family to miss me if I die.” Brian whispers the shine of rage in his eyes fading.
“We are your family.” Dom tells the blonde and just like that the fire is back in Brian's eyes.
“Bullshit!” Brian screams shoving away from Vince. “Family? You threatened to kill me if I showed my face in your part of town Dom! I was spit on and slapped. I was called a no good fucking lying pig. I love this family, but I wasn't good enough. Not good enough to even been allowed the chance to fucking explain! So don't show up months later and act like you give a fuck about me!”
Dom shifts forward but stops when Brian flinches. “I should have let you explain Brian I know that, but I was angry.”
“Fuck you and your anger!” Brian stumbles again, Vince has had enough. He moves forward and cages the guys back against his chest. Locking his arms around the smaller man effectively holding him up. He can feel the frantic pounding of Brian's heart.
“Brian.” Vince says trying to catch the guys attention the older man didn't like how wild the guys heart was pounding.
“I didn't do anything wrong, it was my job!” Brian suddenly sobs. “I made sure your family was safe and I left like you told me too. So don't fucking show up now, don't fucking pity me if I want to fucking get high or god damn die! I was living in a whore house Dom! The fucking landlord would only let me fucking stay if I fought and let him sell my ass for beatings!”
“God damn it Brian!” Dom screams but he's quickly shut down from his own rant when Brian heaves. The blonde leans forward in Vince's arms and throws up so violently he goes limp as soon as his stomach contents hit the floor.
Dom's eyes go impossibly wide as he rushes forward as Vince hurries to adjust Brian in his arms to check on him. Vince hears Leon stomping down the stairs as Vince finally gets a good look at Brian's face. The kid is sickeningly pale, he sweating bullets and his breath heaving so fast his chest rattled.
Dom drops his fingers to Brian's pulse on his wrist and curses. “Mia!” Dom shouts up the stairs before turning back towards Vince. “Put him on the bed, his fucking heart is racing.”
Vince gently lays Brian down on the bed just as Mia comes rushing down the stairs. Her eyes taking in Brian before her feet even landed on the thick carpeted floors of the basement.
“Leon get my bag and the first aid kit.” Mia says as she pushes back Vince and checks Brian's pulse with her own fingers. Vince didn't even need to lay his fingers against the thin wrist to seeing the pounding pulse. And if Vince looks just right he can even see the pulse under the bandages around Brian's neck.
“What happened?” Mia asks as she brushes the curls out of Brian's face. “Get a cool rag Vince, he has a fever.”
Vince does as he's told, he side steps the vomit on the floor and rushes towards the bathroom and comes back with a cold damp rag. He folds the thing before placing it on Brian's forehead.
“They were fighting.” Leon says as he dumps the bag and first aid kit on the bed by Brian's bare feet. Vince stares down at the guys toes, suddenly almost comically remembering they hadn't bothered to bring Brian a pair of shoes when they took him from his apartment.
Mia glowers up at her brother. “What the hell Dom?” The now angry women shots Vince a glare as well.
Vince tosses up his hands in defense. “Whoa, no for once it wasn't me.”
“Mia.” Dom sighs out. “It was just an argument that got out of hand.”
Mia is checking Brian's blood pressure as Dom tries to smooth out his sisters anger. She curses up a storm as she looks at the reading before she grabs a note book of Vince's nightstand and writes down the readings.
“I don't give a damn Dom!” Mia whispers fiercely. “You can not for any reason work him into such a high stressful situation!”
“What did you want me to do Mia!? The kid is fucking killing himself with drugs! That shit don't fly with me and you know it!”
Mia snaps up so fast Vince took a shocked step backwards. “You don't get to say shit about his flaws! He's lost everything he's worked for. You read the shit that happened to him as a child. The drugs and drinking is horrible yes, but Brian is undoubtedly depressed and in pain. What I want you to do is take a fucking step back and support him through this instead of trying to force your will on him.”
“He doesn't want our help!” Dom growls back. “Brian doesn't think of us as family, how the hell am I suppose to help if he pushes us away?”
Vince frowns at this. “No.” Dom glances up towards his best friend at that. “He loves us, his actions prove that and he's hurt and angry but that doesn't mean he doesn't want help. He's been alone for most of his life, he fought alone, he survived alone. Then he met us, learned to love us as his family and we booted his ass to the curb.”
Mia nods sadly. “He probably doesn't know how to except help Dom. As a child his mother who was suppose to love him, take care of him chose drugs over him. Then the foster homes, families that were suppose to look after the children in their care beat him and used him for their own gain.” Mia's voice hitches at that. “We need to earn his trust, we as a family need to show him that we love him and support him. Even with the drug use and the drinking. We need to be the support system at his back and by his side. We need to give Brian something he has never had before, we need to love him so fiercely so strongly that he will want to get better.”
“I know that Mia.” Dom hisses out. “I was trying to tell him that.”
Leon shifts awkwardly for a moment making everyone glance his way. “You were telling him what to do Dom. It might have been with good intentions, but you just told someone who has been abused, used and told what to do with his life that he didn't have the right to chose what he wants to do with it.”
Dom frowns. “Shit.” The bigger man sighs. “I can't sit back and watch him do this to himself.”
“You have to.” Vince says, Dom's eyes cut to the dark hairs man with a glare. “If we push him, demand things of him he's going to push back every chance he gets. Or god forbid he'll disappear in the middle of the night and we'll never be able to find him again.”
“Where do we start?” Dom asks with a sad huff. His eyes were roaming over Brian again, seeing what everyone else saw. Malnourished, sickly pale skin, bruises and angry cuts. Fast harsh breathing, and a raging fever.
Mia pulls out her stethoscope and listens to Brian's lungs. “First we need to get our hand on antibiotics, injections. He has a nasty chest infection, there is possibly water in his lungs with how they sound. I need oxygen too just in case.”
Vince stiffens at that. “Why the oxygen?”
“He's probably going to need oxygen therapy. With how bad his lungs sound we should take him to a hospital but he will run the first chance he gets. If we can get everything I need I can treat him here, plus we don't run the risk of a hospital finding out about his drug problem and reporting him if we stays here.”
“Okay.” Vince says with a nod. He didn't want Brian to run off, and he sure the hell didn't want a hospital to detain him. It would be even worse if they found out he was suicidal, they wouldn't be able to get anywhere close to Brian if that happened and the last thing he needed was being alone.
“So oxygen, liquid antibiotics, anything else?” Vince was trying to think of a way to get such things without stealing from the hospital itself.
“IV fluids, Buprenorphine and Clonidine.”
Vince glares. “What the hell are the last two?”
Mia looks down towards Brian sadly, more pointedly at the track marks on his arms. “It's to help with withdraw symptoms.”
Vince went cold at that, he didn't even consider withdraw. “How bad do you think that's going to get?”
“Dilaudid is a highly addictive drug, hospital only really use it in high pain cases even then Doctors only give them small dosages. Someone can get addicted to it only using it once, by the track marks on his arms he's been using it for a while. His withdraw symptoms will actually be worse because of all the other pain killers he was taking on top of it.”
Dom was cursing up a storm now. “What's going to happen when he goes into withdraw?”
Mia bit her lip. “Muscle and bone pain for starters. Possible Diarrhea, restlessness, painful tremors.” Mia squeezed Brian's hand. “Intense drug cravings, body cramps, sweats, shaking even vomiting and anxiety. Agitation will be a big factor as well, so you can't get upset with him if he lashes out. He has been depended on a drug to escape from his physical and mental pain. He's going to hurt and scream and most likely try to get out just to get his hands on something to take off the edge. The most concerning thing is going to be low blood pressure, this is going to put his body through more stress then it needs to be handling right now.”
“He's sick right now Mia.” Vince hisses. How the hell could he deal with all that while sick?
“I know, that's why we aren't taking him off the drugs yet.”
Dom glares and opens his mouth to interject before Mia raises a shaky hand to stop him. “No, we can't just cut him off Dom. The stress of that on top of his chest infection with work him into such a crisis he could stroke out or have a heart attack.”
Vince blanches at that. “So what we give him the drugs still? How long?”
“Until I can get the infection under control. Once his lungs are better we can wean him off the Dilaudid.”
“How do we get the stuff he needs?” Leon asks the most important question at the moment. How did once criminals obtain prescription drugs, IV's, fluids and a working oxygen tank. It's not like they could just walk into a hospital and steal it and they sure the hell couldn't buy that shit at a store.
“Hector has a cousin who is a doctor.” Mia says, and Vince tries not to snort at the fact they were once again going to get help from a cousin of Hector's after his family had found the Buster to begin with. “Call Hector, tell him what we need see what they can do. If I really have to I'll steal the drugs from the hospital during my training session tonight.”
Jesse chose that moment to slid into Vince's room. The kid who looked half asleep snapped to attention when he saw how poorly Brian was doing. “Mia?”
“Jess, He'll be okay.” Mia promises, if it was a lie no one was sure but they weren't going to voice those worries. “I need you to do me a favor okay?”
Jesse nods frantically. “Of Course, just name it.”
Mia smiles. “I need you to get Brian's medical records. I can't do it because I don't have that type of clearance on the hospital's computers, so I need you to hack into their system and get it for me okay?”
“Sure, that's easy enough. I'll have it in about an hour.”
*-*-*-*-*-*
Hector and his large ass family provided to be much more helpful then anyone expected. Not even three hours after calling him did the guy roll up in front of the Toretto house and climbed out of his car. He waved a hand towards Vince and Dom who had been waiting for him on the porch when they heard him approach.
“Okay boys, I got everything Mia asked for and then some.” Hector pops the trunk of his car, Vince is so surprised about the amount of shit in the guys trunk, he whistles.
“Jesus man.” Vince hums out as he pulls two oxygen tanks from the trunk. “How did you get all this shit, and so damn fast?”
Hector chuckled. “You know you can rely on my ass homes. It's not even stolen either.”
Dom looks towards the man questioningly as he pulls two large duffle bags from the trunk Hector points too. Hector quickly grabs the last load of medical supplies and follows Dom and Vince inside. They carefully sit everything down on the kitchen table before Hector is speaking again.
“My pops runs a free clinic a few towns over. When my cuz couldn't get the supplies you need with out someone noticing we gave my granddad a call. Pop is always happy to help someone in need so he loaded up the car.”
“I think this is a bit more then we need, doesn't he need this stuff for patience?”
“See Mia told me Brian would be having a rough time with withdraw.” When Vince shots the guy a dark look he raises his hands. “Nah man I ain't judging, shit happens and it's obvious snowman was put through the ringer if he fell back on drugs to cope. Anyways I told pops and since he knows how to handle such situation's he set Mia up with everything that would be needed.”
“Mia gave us a list of what she needed, why the extra?” Dom asks looking down at the assortment of items. When he see's a bag of orange pill bottles he scowls.
“Dilaudid right?” Hector asks making sure he heard right when he had spoken to Mia over the phone.
“Yea.” Vince answers.
“Shit, okay see here's the thing. Withdraw is bad for anyone, withdraw from Dilaudid? The guy is going to want to claw his brains out so listen closely. He is going to start to experience symptoms just hours after his last dose. Anxiety and restlessness my pops said. It hits like a peak or some shit after the first fourteen hours, that's when the nasty painful shit starts. Nausea, shaking, chills, muscle aches the feeling like his bones are on fire. Vomiting.” Hector points to the bag full of IV fluids.
“He's going to need a lot of that. We also tossed in some meds for his nausea and puking it doesn't always help though. I'm sure Mia knows but pops just wanted to remind her that the Clonidine with help with the anxiety, muscle aches, sweating and the cramping.”
Vince suddenly wished he was taking notes. How Hector was reciting this shit from memory was beyond Vince but he gave the guy props for remembering every helpful word. When they had found Brian Vince had hoped they would have a shouting match, maybe throw some punches. But to find Brian like this and to know he wasn't going to get any relief anytime soon was pissing Vince off.
“Pop's didn't want to send the Buprenorphine but he did anyways. He wanted me to tell Mia if at all possible do not give it to him.”
Both Dom and Vince stiffen at the guys words. “Why not?”
“Cause that shit has similar effects to Dilaudid, it's just a substitute with the same outcome. Doctor's use that to taper someone off Dilaudid but that's in a medical setting, so yea try not to use that shit. Look I've seen someone go through withdraw before, best thing I found to do was manage the symptom and be the support they need.”
Hector looks over the items before stepping back with a the bag of pill bottles. “Last thing before I head out. This has rapid working sleeping pills he might need it at some point. Also Zanex, klonopin and ativan. All will help with sleep, joint and muscle pain and the big one blood pressure. Plus the Zanex can also help if his anxiety gets to high.”
Hector places the bag back on the table before nodded. “You get all that?”
Vince wasn't so sure he did if he was honest, but if he really needed to he was sure he could look that shit up or call Hector. Vince see's Dom nod, if he was telling the truth Vince wasn't sure but he wasn't going to mention it.
“Cool.” Hector whips out a piece of paper and places it on the table, there is a phone number on it. “That's my pops number, he said you could call at any time if you need to.”
“Thanks Hector.” Vince hears Dom say as he walks the guy towards the door.
“Nah, no problem man. Like I said snowman was a cool guy. I'm happy to help, love to see the kid back on the racing scene with that cocky ass smile, it was beautiful.”
Vince grimaced at that as he stares helplessly down at the medical equipment. That snarkey, cocky ass smile Brian use to wear was beautiful and Vince just hoped to god they could get Brian back to that point.
*-*-*-*-*-*
Once Mia had returned home from her class she listened to both Dom and Vince repeat what Hector had told them. It was easier then Vince thought to remember the instructions when it was such an important matter. Both men had taken turns talking, each following the next line or filling in something the other forgot.
Mia had looked troubled when they told her Hector's grandfather didn't want her using the Buprenorphine. She had nodded her head and placed the medication in a hiding spot where Brian couldn't track it down on the off chance he realized it was in the house once they cut him off from the Dilaudid.
Vince wasn't to worried about him moving to find any drugs currently. The guy looked miserable, his fever had spiked in the last few hours and he kept mumbling and twisting in his sleep from discomfort. Brian had only cracked his eyes open once since the three had entered the room, he had glared feebly towards Dom before his eyes had slid closed again. Both Mia and Vince had shot the bigger man there glares when it looked like he wanted to say something to Brian.
While Brian rested, not peacefully Vince might add Mia took it upon herself to hook up the IV antibiotic's and fluids. The sick man was already sweating so much Vince and Dom had held the guy up while Mia changed the sheets. Mia had cringed when they changed Brian's sweaty clothes, like everything else hearing about the scars and actually seeing them was an awful reminder what a bright smile could hide.
And hide it Brian did, because looking back on it all the occasions Brian had been smiling brightly no one would look his way and think past child abuse. When Jesse had first came to their family the kid had flinched when someone touched him and cringed when loud noises startled him. He was the poster child for what someone would picture from past trauma. Brian hadn't been that, he had suffered more the Jess, more then anyone Vince had ever encountered and no one had been the wiser.
“I need to go start dinner soon.” Mia says after she double checks to make sure the IV lines didn't get twisted or tangled. “If he wakes up by any chance see if you can get him to drink some water?”
Vince dropped down into a chair they had taken from the living room. “Sure Mia.”
Once last check from her and she was gone. Vince sat back and closed his eyes, he had been expecting a fight when Brian had woke up sure. But he hadn't expected it to turn into Brian barfing his guts up and passing out. It had taken Vince and hour and a half to scrub and clean the vomit out of the carpet, he didn't mind really but he was glad it smelled better in here again.
The scent his puke had contained was nothing but alcohol. It had made cleaning up the mess easy since it didn't seem like the guy had eaten in days, but the pungent odor of stomach acid filled tequila puke had even Vince gagging. He wasn't known for having a weak stomach either.
“I just want to be left alone and your family decides to pump me full of meds instead.” Vince's head snaps up at the raspy sound of Brian's voice, the blonde was staring down at the IV's in the tops of his hand. Glaring at the things like he wanted to pull them out.
“We want you to get better.” Say's Vince. He seems Brian's fingers twitch at that and barely looks up in time to see the look of disgust on the ex-cops face.
“What the fuck for?” Brian hums out, he turns his head to look at Vince those blue eyes bright with fever but they lacked the life they once had in them.
“So we can show you that you are a part of this family.” It was probably the wrong thing to say at the time, but Vince wasn't always good with words or keeping his thoughts to himself.
“A few months back everyone hated my fucking guts, what the hell has changed since then?” Brian's voice was hallow again, dead, quite. Vince found himself missing the low musical timber his voice had once been. When he hadn't been sick, beat to shit and all around not taking care of himself.
“We realized our own mistakes Brian.”
Brian huffed an almost broken laugh. “Little to late for that.”
Those words grip Vince by the heart and squeezes. That wasn't what he wanted to hear, not by a long shot. Those words sound like a goodbye, and end to something the Toretto team had started and ruined.
“It's never to late for you to forgive us Bri.” Brian blinks multiple times, at first Vince thinks the kid is trying to stay awake, but then the older male see's the tears. Brian looks towards the ceiling and brushes away the trails of wetness of his burning cheeks.
“I'm not mad at anyone Vince, what right do I have to be angry?”
The question confuses Vince so much he's silent for several minutes. What the hell did Brian mean what right did he have?
“You have more of a right to be pissed then we ever did Bri.” Brian stiffens at Vince's words a trait the dark headed man was starting to hate. Everything anyone seemed to say set the guy on edge, made him tense up like he was waiting for blows to be thrown.
“I lied.” Brian whispers. “I wormed my way into your family to tear it apart, I planted myself into the thick of your life, Dom's life everyone's with the intentions to send you to jail.”
Vince sighs, he should had guessed Brian felt guilt over his role in the almost down fall of their family. He was just that type of guy, shouldered to much, hid more and in the end if his past was anything to go by was always the one left to suffer for others actions.
“It was your job.” As much as Vince hated to admit it, it had been Brian's job to take them in. He had been a cop and yes he had lied but he never truly hurt this family. He had saved them instead and that was more then any other cop would had done.
“You fucking hate cops.” Brian hisses. The tears were still falling and Vince hated to see them but if the kid needed to cry Vince wasn't going to fault him for that.
“I don't hate you.” Brian had this sudden deer in headlights look, like Vince had just mowed his ass down with his car.
Brian gives a bitter laugh. “Since when?”
“Probably always, my hate was more along the lines of jealousy.” It probably wasn't idea to talk about this, at least not at the time but as long as Brian wanted to keep talking Vince would deal with the consequences of his words.
“I wasn't after Mia.” Brian gave Vince a sad dazed look. “I wasn't lying when I said I couldn't get hard for a women. The actual thought of a chick touching me sexually makes my fucking skin crawl.”
Vince sits up straighter at that, letting Brian know he had the mans full attention. Vince wasn't sure talking about his past experiences would help but he sure the fuck would listen if it got some of it off Brian's chest. The guy held everything so close to his chest it would be helpful to learn who he really was, what he had done and been through as a child. Even if it was horrible and disgustingly hard to hear.
The family needed to learn about the real Brian, not the one who they thought they had known.
“That's okay.” Vince says when Brian doesn't move to speak again. “You do not have to want to be with a chick man, no one is going to judge you.”
Brian gave another bitter laugh. “Yea, you sayin you won't judge me if I tell you I like to be bent over and pounded?”
Brian was trying to bait him into a fight, he could see the determination in those blue eyes. The need to have another screaming match because getting angry was easier then being hurt and depressed. Brian's words had the opposite effect on Vince of course, one he was not for any reason going to point out right now. He wasn't going to tell the younger man his words set a fire on need in his belly, or how they burned through his blood with a rage to beat anyone who dared to lay a hand on the younger man.
“You like what you like, I'm not judging shit.”
Brian looked disappointed at first that his attempt for a fight hadn't worked, then he looked confused almost lost even.
“I don't know what I'm doing anymore.” Brian whispers helplessly. “I don't know where I belong, I don't know how to climb out of this fucking shit show I fell into. After that damn hell with the foster care, then living on the streets until I was sixteen and taken to jail I mapped out my fucking life to the last letter.” Brian swallows. “I had a fucking plan, I was going to show everyone who treated me like garbage I could be something worthwhile. I was going to climb to the fucking top to prove to everyone who beat me, used me and fucking tossed me like some damn broken toy that I wasn't some worthless, broken orphan.”
Vince had to swallow himself to keep the stream of emotions from pouring out of his mouth. He hadn't thought Brian would open up so easily, in retrospect it was probably the killer hang over and raging fever the guy was sporting but Vince would take it. Because this was the shit he needed to know, what his family needed to know to help Brian.
“Then you met us and we destroyed your plan.” It almost killed Vince to say it, but he wished Brian had turned them in because some jail time would probably be better then what they had turned Brian into.
“No.” Brian huffs out sounding almost annoyed. “That's just fucking it, I met the team. I watched and cataloged everything. Your family didn't ruin my plans, everyone showed me what I really wanted. I wanted what you all have, I wanted someone in my fucking corner. I wanted to laugh and feel loved like everyone else did.” Brian gave a broken sob.
“I knew two weeks in I wasn't going to turn anyone in, so I started planning. Made sure I had everything right were I needed it. I put money I won from races aside to pay off the truckers. I broke into Tran's place several times to take finger prints to plant in the cars. I had everything mapped out, then race wars came and y'all were going to do that last heist.”
Brian squeezes his eyes closed, he rubs at his face for a moment before he drops his arm back onto the bed.
“I knew I was fucked the minute I told everyone I was a cop, I knew I wasn't going to have Dom, Mia, you or anyone from your family in my corner. The look of hate on everyone's face's was worse then the words, or the slap, shit I had a wad of spit smack me in the face, but that hate.”
Vince leans forwards towards Brian when the guy turns those blue eyes to look up at Vince's own.
“I've never cared for anyone like I did the people in this house.” Brian whispers. “I never knew seeing the people I loved look at me with so much disgust and burning hatred could hurt so damn bad.”
Brian huffs out a breath before relaxing into the bed. Both men are silent for the longest time. Vince monitoring the sound of Brian's breathing, trying not to grimace at the crackle and wheeze his breath seemed to almost drown in. The sheen of sweat on Brian's to pale skin had seemed to die down some, and Vince was hopeful that meant his fever had finally broken.
Brian had revealed more then Vince had been hoping for. Sure he knew Brain cared for them, loved them even because someone didn't do what Brian did if he hadn't, but to hear the words from the blondes mouth had still been nice. Yet at the same time it also proved how fucking hard it was going to be to make Brian trust them.
Because if Vince was understanding correctly it wasn't the lose of a job, a home or a car that had sent Brian down the rabbit hole to hell. It had been the hate the family he cared about thrown his way. Mia with her angry words, the slap she delivered and the spit she had launched at Brian. Letty snarling and calling Brian every colorful word she could think of. Vince's own hateful words calling Brian a no good fucking pig. Leon's silent hatred, Jesse's hurtful face at finding out Brian had been a liar.
Then the biggest problem of all.
Dom.
He had screamed, shoved and threatened Brian's life. He had swore if he ever saw Brian's face again he would be nothing more then a blood splatter on the sidewalk. If Vince thought back to that night, he could see it. He could see that desperation in Brian's eyes. That need for them to understand. Then his mask had fallen, he accepted his fate and disappeared like Dom had told him too.
Brian was right.
No one had been in his corner.
No one had given him a chance.
Vince looked up to tell Brian something, anything to get the foul taste of regret out of his throat but the blonde was fast asleep. Wild curls resting against his forehead, his breathing even but strained. Vince stood and headed up stairs, anything he had to say could wait. He needed time to process everything he had learned anyways.
He also had to inform the others about what Brian had revealed.
*-*-*-*-*-*
Dinner had been a quite affair after Vince had taken the time to slowly go over everything Brian had told him. The reactions around the table had been expected for the most part. Dom's burning anger at himself, for his past words and his role in pushing Brian away. Jesse's heartbroken eyes as he stared down at his food, pushing the potatoes around his plate. Leon's scowling worried eyes as they stared towards the door to the basement.
Mia had to excuse herself to whip away her tears and the most shocking had been Letty. She had never cared for Brian when she had first met him, coming from her own broken home had made her bitter towards anyone who she thought had a pampered childhood. Not only had she learned like the others Brian had anything but a rosy life, but to hear Vince tell them Brian had been torn to shreds by the hate everyone shown him that night had made the woman's strong willed disposition crumble.
Everyone that sat at the Toretto table were nothing more then a bunch of misfits who hadn't fit in. Who had fought tooth an nail to get where they were. Who had made bad judgments and had one to many close calls with life. They had molded their lives around family, the one thing everyone had needed, the one thing they always offered up for others.
They hadn't done that for Brian though, they hadn't given him the chance to explain. To tell them why he was blowing his cover, why he had went out on a limb to save them. No one had given him the opportunity to make his mistakes right and come home to the family. They had pushed him over the cliffs edge and turned their backs as he fell.
It was the cold reality they would have to live with for many years. If they couldn't pull Brian out of this depression, out of his need to no longer existent it was possible the tight family unit they had formed would crumble. Vince wasn't really sure when it happened, or why it took him now to realize it but Brian was a bigger part of this family then anyone gave him credit for.
How they had missed it no one really knew. Sure there had been the sting of betrayal hearing Brian call himself Officer Brian O'Connor but that didn't over look the fact as soon as he said those words he begged them not to leave and take the trucks. He through his cards out, had shown his hand and folded to save them, and no one thought twice to question why?
They knew now though, because Brian O'Connor loved them more, cared for them with such a passion he turned his back to is own life plan. To his own moral code and his need to prove to himself and the ones who had hurt him as a child that he was something wonderful. He had taken a shit childhood and came out with a bright fucking smile, a strong will and passion for life that most wouldn't be capable off with his past.
He was none of those things now. Brian was empty, heavyhearted and so done with his actuality in life that it would be hard to pull him from the bottom of the cliff they had tossed him from.
While everyone mold over their own thoughts and feelings Vince tried to form his own plan. It was going to take some work, it was going to need a fine tuning he had never had to do before. Vince was going to have to take Brian apart, make him show every dark corner, every frightening thought and hidden secret. Vince was going to have Brian show his hand one more time, then Vince was going to fucking fix it.
He was going to build Brian back up with better hopes and wishes in life. He was going to be the pillar of strength no one had given Brian as a child or an adult. It will be the most frightening, heavy trail in life he had ever had to face, but fuck they owed Brian that. They owed him so damn much it was suffocating, and in the end when he was done if Brian wanted to leave to escape the bad this family had placed on him that would be okay.
It would fucking hurt, but Vince would send Brian on his way with a fucking smile because the guy needed something like that in his life. He needed to know someone was in his corner for once.
*-*-*-*-*-*
Everyone had headed to bed that night with sullen faces and mumbled words of good night. Mia had stopped down in Vince's room to change out Brian's fluids and antibiotic before she gave the blonde truffle of curls a gentle stroke and headed to bed herself. She didn't need to warn Vince to get her if anything happened because the man already knew. If anything in Brian's conditioned changed over night he would raise hell to get her down here. He was being optimistic and telling himself that wouldn't happen, but as of late nothing had really been going their way.
Vince wasn't at all that astonished when he was pulled from his slumber because Brian was a wither mess beside him. The guy was sweating buckets and shuddering so harshly the bed vibrated with his full body trimmers. Vince was out of the bed and flipping on the light in second, Brian moaned at the sudden flare of light but it didn't slow his shaking in the least.
Vince frantically called for Mia at the top of the stairs before rushing back down. He wasn't sure what was happening but he was positive it wasn't his chest infection that was causing Brian so much pain. Vince moved to Brian's side of the bed just as Brian launched himself up and over the edge.
Brian was in the grips of violent vomiting with nothing more the Vince holding him up when Mia came tumbling down the stairs with a ruffled Dom hot on her heels. Mia took one look at Brian before shouting out a curse and running back out of the basement. Vince had to bit his tongue to keep from yelling at her to come back. He knew she was most likely getting something she needed, or in this case something Brian needed but coiling muscle spasms that Vince could feel under Brian's flesh was worrying.
Once the spell of puking seem to pass Brian attempted to curl in on himself. The trimmer's had seemed to worsen since Vince had woken up, his skin was cool and clammy to the touch. It wasn't just the sweat soaked skin and clothes, or the full body vibrate that seemed to be attacking Brian that was concerning. The harsh gasping breaths he seemed to have trouble taking that had Dom moving to stand over a puddle of vomit to help Vince straighten Brian in a better position to breath.
Even once they had him uncurled and well supported it didn't seem to help, Vince was seconds away from screaming at Mia to hurry the fuck up. The rushing sound of feet and Mia's worried face appearing at the top of the stairs was the only thing that saved Vince from getting mouthy and keeping him from having his teeth knocked out by Dom.
Vince didn't know what Mia had went to get but when she stuck a syringe into a bottle both men knew was the shit Brian had taken into using they tensed. Vince was silently cursing himself, Hector had warned them withdraw symptoms would start hours after he last dose if he didn't take another, and as much as Vince didn't want Brian on the shit he was pissed no one remembered to give Brian some before they had all went to bed.
They were already doing a shit job at taking care of Brian through if they had forgotten such a vital piece of information. Vince watched as Mia administered the Dilaudid to Brian's IV line, he watched as the clear liquid moved it's way through the tub and under Brain's skin. A part of him wanted to pull the IV out but the bigger part that hated to see Brian in pain kept him from doing so.
The shit they had jump pumped him full of was fact acting because in second's Brian was calming, his tense coiled body relaxing against the mattress. Once he was still Mia moved towards the oxygen tank, turned it on and placed it over Brian's mouth and nose.
“It's just a precaution.” Mia says when she notices Vince's worry. “He was probably feeling the effects hours ago which means he put a lot of strain on himself, pure oxygen will help relax him and it will help his lungs with the infection.”
Dom reaches forward then a places a large hand on Brian's forehead. “His fever is gone for the moment at least.”
“I'm curios to how he even got water, or whatever it is in his lungs.” Vince voices, it had been bothering him. Brian didn't have a cough, and the fever had only started once they brought him home. Brian mumbles something making everyone jump. They had all been so sure he had been sleeping.
“What Brian?” Mia asks recovering faster then the men.
“Water-boarding.” Brian sighs out. “Rent was due, needed money, the fuck that owns the apartment pimped me out for some guys who like to watch people drown.”
Vince snarls before he could stop himself. He could understand the drugs to escape, the drinking to pass out but he couldn't fucking understand why Brian had allowed someone to treat him that way.
“Why?” Vince barks out, and he feels like shit when Brian flinches. “Why would you allow someone to do that? Why the fuck would you live there knowing what that man does to get money for rent?”
Brian makes a feeble attempt to sit up, the anger is back and Vince wasn't sorry he asked what he did. He would take Brian's anger over everything else he had been feeling recently.
The guy whips the mask off his face and tosses it on the nightstand. His blue eyes hard and seething with rage. “Because I'm fucking black-listen!” Brian snarls. “The cops have me on every fucking shit list they could think of. I try to get approved for a house or apartment they look up my name and hit a fucking wall with a big red fucking X. No one would fucking take me as a renter because my record is fucked. I looked everywhere, I even looked out of state but I couldn't even rent a fucking car to leave. That was the only damn place that would take me. I tried to find a job but I couldn't even get fucking hired at a damn McDonald's.”
Dom reaches out to steady Brian when he sways but the guy smacks the hand away before Dom could even make contact.
“I didn't want to live on the fucking streets again.” Brian says almost pleadingly. “So what if I had to get the shit beat out of me, it was somewhere warm to fucking sleep even if it was hell.”
And that Vince thinks as he stares down at Brian, was tragic. The thought of sleeping on the streets again cold and forgotten had been so frightening for Brian he allowed himself to get wailed on for money. He let people hold him down and drown his ass just to stay in that germ infested shit hole.
Mia is crying again and for one split second Vince see's the need in Brian's eyes to sooth her, but then his eyes cloud over and he looks away.
“It's not like it's the first time I've been sold off for money.”
*-*-*-*-*
Brian's words haunt Vince, Mia and Dom for two weeks as they watched him fight of the lung infection. It was slow going, they had bad nights were Brian had sat up because his lungs had been fighting so hard to pull air into his drowning lungs that he couldn't sleep. Not even when they dosed him with the sleeping pills Hector had dropped off.
The first week had been the hardest. The constant injections of Brian's drug of choice kept him relax for the most part. Almost in a trance after he was given a shot, Vince had always watched the moment the drugs had taken affect. Those blue eyes would dull and cloud over, he would be in an almost catatonic state while he road his high.
The end of the second week Vince had almost crumbled in on himself with reliefe when Mia said Brian's lungs were finally clear of any fluid. Vince no longer had to hear the crackling wheeze that had been present with each breath Brian had took.
Brian hadn't talked to them anymore though, the silent treatment game he had going on was holding strong. At point's Vince could see when Brian wanted to snap out at them, the hovering and the worry but he had always kept stubbornly quite. As if speaking would somehow ruin whatever illusion Brian always zoned out to.
Vince was shifting restlessly in front of the basement door. Today was the day they were going to take Brian off the Dilaudid. They had told Brian ahead of time of course and the guy had looked pissed, but then he had crumbled. Had looked away from them and kept silent. He had been so quiet recently Vince was wishing the guy would start screaming at them again.
Jesse often sat in the room with Brian. Reading car magazines out loud or going on and on about a design he had mapped out in his mind. Vince had been reluctant to allow it at first not only did Vince did not want Brian to get frustrated and lash out at Jesse, he also didn't want Jess to stress Brian out with his high energy presence. That was until Vince had watched them from the top of the stairs on day.
Jess had been seated in the chair next to the bed, talking aimlessly about all the car designs he had thought up for the Supra. Vince had cringed when Jesse mentioned the car Dom and Brian had once worked happily on together. He had been worried for a moment that topic of choice would upset Brian. But as Jesse talked, his hands waving wildly around him Brian watching. On two occasions he saw the blondes lips twitch like he wanted to smile but each time the mask had fallen back in place.
Brian never complained about Jesse's constant chatter so the stream of words that fell out of the kids mouth kept coming.
Jesse always had Brian's full attention.
Vince figured out one day it was because Brian could relate better to Jesse then anyone else. They had both been abused as children, hurt in ways a kid shouldn't have to suffer through. Vince knew Brian didn't have it in him to upset Jess by making him stop talking.
Vince looks to the clock on the wall and sighs, he wasn't one to call himself a pussy but he was about to go down stairs and tell Brian they had gotten rid of his drugs. Everyone knew it was coming, they had prepped, read and learned everything they could about withdraw, but that didn't really mean they were prepared.
*-*-*-*-*-*
Fifteen hours into cutting off Brian the guy was a wither mess once more. His skin and the sheets under him were soaked with sweat. Brian was curled so tightly in on himself it had been painful watching him twist in such a manner. Mia hadn't wanted to give him something right off the bat, and Brian hadn't asked for anything yet, but listening to the low whines leave Brian's voice was hard to hear.
Twenty hours in Brian was heaving into a trash can while Vince sat behind him to hold him up. Mia had come down stairs to add a new IV fluid bag to keep Brian from getting dehydrated. It was only the first bout of vomiting and luckily over the last couple of weeks they had kept Brian on gentle foods. It didn't seem to help now, all the soup he had eaten earlier had rushed up so quickly Brian's neck had hyper-extended with the force of it.
Vince tried not to cringe when he felt puke splatter against his hand, but he wasn't going to move from his spot to keep Brian supported. With a moan Brian finally pulls back from the trash can, his once tanned sun kissed skin was ghostly pale. Once Vince has the trash can places safely on the floor he reaches for the rag sitting in the bowl on the nightstand at whips at Brian's face.
Brian grunts as the coolness of the soft rag but he gives an almost happy sigh when the sweat is cleaned off his face. The guy made a poor attempt to get back on the bed properly but his legs and back were cramping and spasming so bad he couldn't move his body properly. Vince slides out from behind Brian and helps him lay down. While Brian didn't seem like he was going to vomit again Vince hurries to the bathroom and changes out the trash bag in the trashcan.
When he got back to the room Brian had rolled onto his knees, his chest was flat against the bed. The shaking if at all impossible had grown worse in the minute it had taken Vince to put a clean lining in the trash can.
“Just let me fucking die.” Brian cries out as his body seizes up.
Vince finds he wants to vomit himself at Brian's words, but he doesn't take it to heart. He simply slides his way to Brian and tries to massage the tension out of his back. Brian moans in pain again as he goes impossibly ridged.
When he see's Brian gag, Vince has Brian up and hanging over the trashcan once again. This round was worse then the last, the fluid rushes so fast so wildly from his throat that Brian chokes on it. Vince is cursing up a storm when Mia comes down to check in on Brian. She looks heartbroken at seeing Brian in such a state.
“We need to give him something for the cramping.” Vince hisses out when he feels Brian's muscle's seize and cramp up again. Brian whines pitifully before he's gasping and vomiting again.
Mia nods quickly before heading quickly back up stairs. She had all medication's locked away and hidden, Brian hadn't made an attempt to find anything yet but they weren't even a full day into the on set of withdraw. Mia hurries back and administered a dose of Clonidine, it didn't act as fast as Vince would had liked but twenty minutes later Brian had finally at least stopped crying out when his limbs locked up.
Vince cleans Brian up with the cool rag again while Mia bumps the vomit and takes the two bag already full out to the trash. The Clonidine had also seemed to help the sweating to a great extent so while he wasn't pouring out pools of sweat Vince changed the sheets. Even if he was miserable it didn't mean Brian wouldn't enjoy clean dry sheets.
*-*-*-*-*
Vince and Brian both were two days into no sleeping. The symptoms had only raised ten fold for Brian, Mia had taken to giving Brian both Clonidine and Zanex. The relaxant had only been used for the first time today. Brian's anxiety had spiked in the early morning, little noises and sudden movement had him jerking and flinching like someone was out to get him.
He had also hallucinated at one point in the night. Vince had dozed off for only a moment when he was jerked awake by Brian screaming bloody murder. It had only taken Vince a moment to figure out what was happening when he saw the flushed skin and dazed haunted eyes. Brian had been staring off into the corner of Vince's room like a monster was standing there to get him.
Dom had came barreling into the room just as Brian screamed again. The delusional man had flung himself off the bed and curled into a small ball. Both Vince and Dom had been stunned for a moment until the screams turned to sobs. Vince had rushed forward, he had kept his voice low and as calm as he could as he tried to soothe Brian's fear.
“It's okay Bri.” Vince had said running his fingers through Brian's hair. “I gotcha.”
Brian had continued to cry for an hour after that, even after Vince and Dom had moved him back into the bed. Vince was exhausted, Brian more so, between the pain of body spasms, vomiting and the need to make the pain stop left the blonde more then once a sobbing mess.
The third day hadn't consisted of screaming and the anxiety at the moment seemed to be none existent. Brian's mood had shifted so quickly and out of the blue that when Mia had brought down a cold drink and soup she had jerked back from shock and dropped the tray on the ground.
“Why can't your fucking people just let me fucking die!” Vince had jerked his head towards Brian's angry scream and Dom who had been descending down the stairs flattered the last step. Brian had spent the last two days laying in bed, so when he tumbled out of the soft confounds of blankets and pillows he stumbled. Vince moved forward, he didn't know what Brain was up to but the look of determination in his eyes had sent warning bells off in his mind.
“Mia out now!” Dom barks out when he too see's what Vince did. Mia doesn't question the order, she rushes up the stairs and shuts the door behind her. Brian is breathing heavily but it doesn't keep Vince from hearing the sound of someone shifting their weight at the top of the stairs.
“Move the fuck out of my way.” Brian growls out when both Vince and Dom move to block his way towards the stairs.
“You can't leave Bri.” Vince says, hoping to stop whatever the fuck this was before it started. Vince was all for anger, he would take it over screaming, crying and fear but this.. This wasn't really anger was it? Brian was staring right through them, eyes trained on the door at the top of the stairs.
Brian had only put on about ten pounds since they brought him home, but he used that extra weight to his advantage as he slams his forearm into Vince's chest and knocks him back and onto his ass. If Vince had been expecting it he could have kept his footing, he could have easily side stepped Brian's sudden attack. Vince rolls to his feet just as Brian shockingly and so quick slams his elbow into Dom's gut and makes a mad dash for the door.
“Block the fucking door!” Vince yells out to whomever was outside the room. Vince hears something slam into the door as he grabs Brian by the waist and quickly twists him back around and shoves him towards the bed.
Brian grunts at the attack from behind then his snarling. Almost like a rabid dog as he falls onto the bed.
“Fuck you!” Brian screams as he shoots back to his feet and rushes towards Vince. It's only Dom's large quick arm that snaps out and throws Brian back onto the bed that kept Brian and Vince slamming into one another.
Brian gives a wild scream as Dom pins him to the bed. “Get the fuck of me. Get the fuck off!” Brian jerks his hips, tries to twist out of Dom's strong hold. He gives a frustrated shout when he finally realizes he well and truly trapped under the bigger mass.
“Calm down!” Dom barks out, just as Vince drops onto the bed beside Brian. He's looking down into those wild blue eyes, but the haziness to them let both Dom and Vince know Brian wasn't firing on all cylinders.
“Fuck you, you piece of shit.” Brian snarls back. Dom doesn't even looked fazed at the blondes angry words and Vince was suddenly glad that Mia had warned Dom that Brian would lash out violently.
“You're fine Bri, so calm down.” Dom's voice wasn't barked out this time, but Brian still makes to try to struggle out of Dom's hold once more. Then his mood shifts again, it does a total 360 that makes Vince's head spin.
Brian deflates, he goes limp on the bed and lets out a sob. “Please.” Brain begs quietly, he tries to tug his wrist out of Dom's hold. His breathing picks up when he realizes he can't get loss.
“Oh god.” Brian moans, he tugs on this wrist again. “Please let them go.”
The tears and sudden fear in Brian's eyes has Dom releasing his hold, but the bigger man stays close. All Brian does is curl into a ball and shakes. His rubbing at his wrist absently, his eyes held a far off look. Trapped in a memory.
“Don't like it.” Brian whispers. He closes his eyes tightly. “Don't like being held down.”
Brian shudders once, and Vince? He feels nauseous again. Dom looked green and guilty, he hadn't meant to make Brian relieve a painful memory but they couldn't allow him to escape from this room. Vince was wishing Brian was back to the fighting rage he had been in a moment ago. Seeing him so scared, to know they had made him look that way was sickening.
“We would never hurt you that way Brian.” Dom whispers out as he brushes the wild blonde curls from Brian's face. The younger man tenses at the touch but he relaxes once he notices the fingers in his hair wasn't there to hurt him. Brian is asleep finally after three days of being awake, Dom's gentle petting louring him into a quiet slumber he had needed badly.
They wait a good ten minutes to make sure he was well and truly asleep before Vince moves Brian on the bed fully and covers him up.
“Try to get some sleep while you can.” Dom says as he stands. “I'll lock the door and find something to block it in case he wakes up before you.”
Vince nods numbly as he crawls into bed next to Brian. The blonde hadn't said anything yet about them sharing a bed, but Vince was sure the time would come at some point. Currently though, Vince was to tired to worry about that or anything else. Vince only surrenders to sleep when he hears the door lock and something heavy is shoved in front of the door.
*-*-*-*-*
Vince was curled around Brian, rocking him slowly as the smaller man shudders and cries out in pain. After a week Vince had hoped the withdraws would taper off some, but nothing they had been doing was helping in the past thirty two hours.
Brian had been crying about his bone's being on fire, moaning and whining deep in his throat for so long now that he was horse from the abuse the constant stream of sound that left his mouth. Mia was pacing around the room looking worried. Brian had spent the better part of the day vomiting that he had even blacked out at one point. Vince had been terrified when Brian had gone suddenly limp in his arms, but as quickly he passed out he woke back up and was crying out once more.
So now Vince sat of the floor, Brian curled around him sweating and crying more fluid then Mia could seem to pump into him. They had gone through three IV bags in the past six hours, but any hydration they provided for his body Brian quickly sweated out or vomited up.
The guys skin was burning against Vince's neck were Brian had his face tucked into the curve of his neck. Brian's legs couldn't seem to stop moving, they would jerk each time he had tried to relax, each time a trimmer had over taken him Brian would tense up so tightly that Vince had to readjust his hold on him.
“S'hot.” Brian moans, his breath hot against Vince's skin. Mia looks helplessly at Brian, Vince knew his sister in everything but blood was feeling like a failure. Dom and Letty had reassured her she was doing everything she possibly could. Vince would have attempted his own soothing but he was to busy trying to calm Brian.
Vince hadn't known hot flashes and cold spells would be apart of the withdraw package, but Brian's temperature was fluctuating so rapidly he would go from freezing to burning up in a moments notice. Keeping him warm had been easy, it was the smoldering hot flashes that was the current problem. He was sweating enough as it is without this high fever adding to the problem.
Brian panted through a painful spasm before he was grumbling about being hot once more. In a desperate attempt to help Vince stands with Brian tucked safely in his arms. Mia frowns at Vince as he moves towards the bathroom, but when the man strips off Brian's shirt Mia gets with the program and turns on the cold water tap.
Brian sighs happily as soon as Vince sits in the bottom of the tub as the icy water poured down on the pair. Vince wished his mind had thought up this plan as soon as the hot spells had started. The cold water also seems to soothe Brian's aching limbs because after being impossibly locked tight for the past few hours Brian finally relaxes.
He's asleep in the next five minutes.
*-*-*-*-*-*
Vince was desperate, for once since the withdraw had taken hold a week and a half ago Vince was alone with Brian. Dom and the others had to return to the shop, they couldn't keep it closed any longer. No one wanted to be away when Brian was in such a state but they had money they needed to make. Mia had classes to attend to as well.
So that left Vince, locked in the basement with Brian who was currently curled up in a corner rocking himself slowly. Mia had left food and drinks for the pair before she had left and begged Vince to call if anything happened. Vince was well aware that went for everyone on the team, but Vince was hoping he would be able to handle eight hours alone.
The last two days Brian had been quite, besides cries of pain and mumbling in his sleep when he was actually able to sleep Brian was back to being silent. Vince hadn't been able to find out why yet, the last few days had been such a whirlwind of high emotions, anxiety spikes and more vomiting. The only thing that had seemed to slow any was the puking.
That probably had more to do with the fact that Brian now had no apatite. Everyone had tried on several occasions to get Brian to eat something, but the blonde had always shook his head looking green at the thought.
“Can I die now please?” Brian's quiet voice snapped Vince harshly out of his thought. Brian's blue eyes were looking at Vince pleadingly from across the room. The dark haired man moved toward Brian and dropped down in front of him. Brian didn't flinch away like he had been recently but he looked disappointed when Vince shook his head no at Brian's question.
It was a reoccurring question these last few days. After every long tangent bout of symptoms Brian always asked if he could die. His body consistently shook with the need to get his hands on something that would give him the high his body thought it needed. He hadn't had another fit of anger yet, Vince didn't know if that was a good thing or not.
“You need to stay here with us.” Vince tells Brian. Those blue eyes were locked on Vince's searching for something the older man wasn't aware of.
“Just let me fucking die.” Brian moans out as his body gives a wild trimmer.
“I need you here with me Brian.” Vince snaps back, he hadn't intended on his voice coming out so harshly but it seemed to snap something in the blonde. For the first time in days Brian sits with his back straight and his eyes burning with an emotion Vince can't really place.
“No one in this house needs shit from me.” Brian hisses back. “What the fuck good am I to this family?”
Vince wants to bang his head against a wall. As much as he didn't want to get into a shouting match with the younger man Vince knew it was coming. The emotions had been brewing under the surface of Brian's skin for a while now growing and seething until he just couldn't hold it back anymore.
“You are plenty good for this family Brian.” Vince was going to try to be the reassuring voice Brian had always needed in his life. He was going to try to keep his anger in check and talk like a mature adult, because Brian didn't need anyone to tell him what to do. He needed someone to stand by him when he struggled to find out what he wanted.
“Don't fucking bullshit me Vince.” Brian growls. “You didn't give a shit about me when we first met, you spent your time talking shit and starting a fist fight every fucking chance you got. So why the fuck would I believe any of the shit coming out of your mouth.”
Vince was positive he had that coming, because Brian was right. Vince had taken every chance he got when Brian had first shown up to start a brawl with the blonde haired man. Sure at first Vince thought it was hatred over the man being close to Mia and Dom. Now he knew better though, but Brian didn't know that. Vince wasn't sure it was a wise choice to point that out right now either. It was possible Brian would fall into a fit of pain and forget every words Vince said.
“Do you really think I would have spending this last month taking care of you if I hated you Brian? I'm still doing it now, tell me why the hell I would do that if I didn't give a damn about you? What the fuck would I gain by lying to you?”
Brian doesn't even pause to think about his words. He just spits them out so forcefully without thought that Vince knew that's truly how Brian felt when the words left his chewed up lips.
“To punish me!” Brian screamed out. “To make me feel cared about just to steal it all away like everyone else had!”
Vince jerked back like he had been slapped. It never occurred to Vince that Brian would think they were trying to punish him in some twisted manner. It suddenly made Vince wonder who had done that to Brian, who used their false love for the kid just to snatch it back as a way to punish him.
“I know I can be a cruel bastard Brian but I wouldn't do shit like that and you know it.” Vince rubbed his hand over his face. “I would rather throw punches then play some fucked mind game.”
Brian looked lost for a moment before he gave himself a harsh shake. “I don't know how to do this Vince.”
Vince was thrown by the swift change in subject. “Do what Buster?”
Brian visibly relaxed at the nickname. “I don't know how to be apart of a caring family. How do I know it's not a lie? How the fuck should I know I won't start to care for everyone more then I already do and that it won't be taken away.”
Vince grimaces at that. If he was honest he could understand Brian's reasoning behind his thought process. Brian hadn't had anyone show him what a caring family was like, he hadn't grown up with the love a kid needs to have a sound mind when it came to handling someone loving them.
“Look at me.” Vince demands quietly when Brian turns his head away. The guy looked ashamed at his own words and that just wouldn't do. Vince cupped Brian's face and held on when Brian looked like he was going to look away again. Brian frowned at the tender touch but he didn't pull away. Vince was going to take that as a small win.
“This family can be a mean bunch. We could mow down anyone who tries to step out of line or try to do us wrong, but the one thing this family would never do is use the love you feel for us against you. We would not give our love in return to someone who doesn't deserve it.”
Brian glares when tears fill his eyes and the look was so much like him old self that Vince almost ruins the moment by chuckling.
“I hope you know.” Brian rasps out, his face still in Vince's hands. “That the last couple of months I have felt like a little bitch the world was using as a stepping stone.” Brian's voice was so annoyed by that fact that Vince wasn't able to stop the sharp laugh then.
Brian sneers at Vince's reaction to his words. “Laugh it the fuck up asshole.”
“Don't get pissy.” Vince quickly says to defuse the sudden anger in Brian. His mood seemed to be stable at the moment and Vince didn't want his poor reaction to fuck that up. “I didn't mean to laugh but you just sounded like your old self right then that I felt relieved.”
Brian gives an annoyed sigh at that. “Do you even know me really? I don't even think I know myself.”
Vince shrugs at that. “That doesn't matter, we are starting this shit fresh. We have plenty of time to get to know the real you.”
Brian was tense again. “What if you don't like what you learn about the real me.”
Vince shakes his head. “Nah, I doubt that would be a problem. A lot about you as Brian Spliner was the real you wasn't it?”
Brian looks around helplessly for a moment before glancing back towards Vince. “Yes, when I would go under for a job I weaved my lies with truths.”
Brian looked so disgusted then that Vince gave the cheeks in his hands a light squeeze. “All that shit right there needs to be put to rest man.”
Brian raises a brow at that. “What the fuck are you talking about?” Vince could see the sweat collecting on Brian's forehead again whatever pause in his suffering he was currently in was almost to its end.
“That self loathing you have for yourself Brian. You may have been a cop, and even sent in to arrest us but you didn't do that. You warned us about the cops, you kept us from doing a heist that could have turn deadly. Then you went so far to frame Tran for our crimes, not only taking the heat off us but also taking care of all the shit problems Tran brought with him.”
Brian shrugged. “I couldn't be the reason everyone lost their family. I couldn't stand back and let anyone possibly get hurt or sent to prison. The way everyone loves one another in this house is just to fucking good to tear apart. I physically do not have it in me to hurt anyone here that way.”
Vince nods because he knows this. They all did now, and it was fucking shitty it had taken Brian spiraling down into a drug addiction for them to see that, but none the less they knew now. There wasn't anything this world could throw at them that would make them see Brian as anything other then family.
“We know that Bri.”
Brian give an almost smile at that.
*-*-*-*-*
Two weeks. Two fucking weeks and Brian's body was still fighting off the hold the drugs had on him. Vince had been devastated to learn that some withdraw could last up to a month, Vince hoped to god that didn't happen to Brian. He seemed to have longer periods of time between symptoms now but when they hit they hit hard.
Vince had woken up one night to find Brian trying to break out of the basement and get a hit of anything that would take the edge off. Vince had taken a shaking sweat soaked Brian away from the door and put him back to bed. Brian had fought him for a moment but once Vince had him locked against his chest as they laid in bed again Brian's anger turned into painful sobs.
Now Brian was currently rolling in the bed. His legs and arms seizing with this round. Mia had given him a mild pain reliever but all that seemed to do was make Brian pissy and snappish. The blonde had snarled at Mia as she handed him the pill, cursing about the fact he knew she had better shit that would take away his pain.
Brian bit his lip so hard that he had drawn blood when he saw how his words hurt Mia. He had apologized until he was blue in the face before he was back to moaning in pain. Vince was sitting on the chair trying to wrack his brain for something that would help. The cold showers had lost their effectiveness once his body got use to the cold sensation.
They had tried a heating pad but that had only worked for about an hour before Brian was screaming and cursing as his muscles tried to pull themselves from Brian's skin. It wasn't till Brian had rolled to his stomach and dug his fingers into his lower back did Vince get an idea.
“Bri.” Vince calls out as he stands from the chair and sits on the side of the bed. He makes sure not to bounce the bed when he places his weight on it. Sharp movements when Brian was in the thaws of body spasms made him hurt worse.
“Hmm?” Brian moans out. He hadn't really been saying much again but Vince had found out that was because the nausea was so bad he thought he would throw up if he spoke to much.
“Do you think you can get your shirt and sweat pants off?” Brian turns his head just enough for Vince to see the strange look that was now plastered on the blondes face. Vince chuckles, he hadn't meant it to sound like come on but if the astonished expression was anything to go by that's how Brian had took it.
“I wan to try to give you a massage.” Brian rolls his eyes but he shakes his head no none the less.
“I don't want to risk moving.” Brian groans out. Vince nodded his understanding, he could see the muscles coil and shudder under Brian's skin as they tightened up before relaxing and starting the process all over again.
Vince looks at the clothes Brian was wearing both the shirt and sweat pants were something old Vince had dug out of the back of his closet for Brian to wear. With a thought in mind Vince slowly stands and makes his way to the bathroom and grabs a pair of scissors.
Brian huffs out an annoyed breath when Vince returns and pulls the shirt away from Brian's skin. The pain filled man tried to turn his head to see what Vince was doing but the action of moving his head made his back jerk and stiffen. Brian freezes, a moan locking in his throat as he waits out the cramps.
Vince cuts the shirt off his back then repeats with the soft pants. Brian gives a quite 'what the fuck' at the feel of the cool air against his skin once the clothes were gone.
“You're fine.” Vince says to keep any bad thoughts that could possibly form in Brian's mind at being practically helpless and in nothing but boxers. Vince straddles Brian's waist but doesn't place any weight on the warm body bellow him. Brian goes ridged but gives a happy moan when Vince digs his fingers into the tight muscles in his lower back.
Vince makes slow work relaxing and rubbing the tightness out of Brian's back before Vince moves to his arms. He gives each shuddering tendons the attention they needed only moving along when they turn to jelly under Vince's thick fingers.
Brian was almost sobbing with reliefe when Vince moves to his legs. He knew they had been giving Brian the most problems so he made sure to move slower on each lower limb. Vince keeps it up until a shadow falls over him. Vince blinks up at Dom who is suddenly standing beside the bed his eyebrow raised.
“He's snoring.” Dom points out as he tilts his head down towards Brian who was now slumbering peacefully for the moment.
“Thank fucking god.” Vince groans out as he gently moves away from Brian and falls back into the chair he had once been in.
“He in pain again?” Dom asks still looking down at the sleeping Brian. Dom reaches over the bed and pulls the blankets over Brian when he shivers in his sleep.
“Fuck yes, Jesus man, how much more of this shit is he going to have to do?” Vince would keep at it as long as he needed but he was getting worried that Brian himself couldn't take much more. Even with the small breaks he got now he was still a miserable mess. He was getting little sleep and eating very little.
“Have you tried giving him a sleeping pill when it gets bad?” Dom asks glossing over Vince's question. It was apparent Dom didn't have the answer to Vince's question.
“He won't take them.”
“Why the hell not?” Dom asks frowning. A week ago Brian had been willing to swallow down any pill you put at his lips.
“He's on a crusade” Vince growls out. When Dom raised a questioning brow to that Vince elaborated. “He doesn't want to take anything that will dull his senses, says he doesn't want to rely on a different drug to get him passed the withdraws from the drugs he had willingly taken.”
Dom curses. “So he's punishing himself?”
Vince nods because that was the first thing he had thought as well. Now that the drugs he had been taking weren't clouding his mind Brian felt ashamed of himself. After a long talk one night the blonde had admitted he felt disgusted with himself for relying on drugs like his mother had. Since that talk Brian refused any and all medication's.
He wouldn't even take a fucking Advil. Vince was glad he didn't want drugs, but to cut off all of them didn't seem idea. The things they had been offering up hadn't even been anything addictive. The sleeping pills Hector's grandfather provided were all natural from what the man had told them when Mia had called on night when Brian was having a long restless, sleepless spell.
Even after they had reassured Brian the pills were okay he hadn't taken them. The guys stubbornness was nothing to play at.
“He thinks he needs to be punished.” Vince answer's as an after thought when he realizes he had been quite for so long.
“He's an Idiot then.” Dom growls out.
Vince rolls his eyes. “Sure man you go ahead and tell him that, I'm sure that will go over real well.”
“I will.”
Vince rolls his eyes again. He wasn't going to be present when that discussion happened that was for sure.
*-*-*-*-*-*
“Damn it Brian!” Dom shouts finally frustrated to the point he couldn't keep quite anymore. Brian had pushed the last of his buttons with his stubbornness, his willingness to suffer when he didn't have to.
Dom had finally convinced Vince to take a day and go to the shop and work. The guy had been reluctant at first but Dom had twisted his arm until he gave in. The bigger man was glad to see Vince so willing to help Brian after the way they use to beat on one another but Dom needed an in to get some alone time with the blonde.
The blonde that was laying on the bed rocking in pain as his muscles continued to seize up after nearly three weeks. He got some reliefe these days more then he had been and he had even left the basement a few times. Of course the family had kept him in eye site at all times, not that they didn't trust Brian not to take anything. That was no longer a problem, the problem now was Brian refused to take everything.
They manly kept an eye out because when his body decided it wanted to tense up and jerk suddenly he could fall. Which they had learned one day when Brian had taken a nasty nose dive into the kitchen table when his legs instantly seized up while he was walking. The gash on his forehead had bled so badly Mia had almost forced Brian to the hospital.
“No.” Brian moaned back. “I'm not taking shit Dom!” Though Brian tried to sound pissy it fell flat when he hissed in pain.
“It's just to help with the cramping muscles Bri! Stop being so fucking stubborn damn it!”
“I don't need it.”
Jesus, Dom could see why Vince was getting so snappish with everyone recently. It was hard to yell at Brian and try to force something on him he didn't want but it was worse seeing him in agony. Dom had called Hector's pops the night before to see if the stiffness and sudden jerking of limbs was normal and when he was reassured that it was and it would pass he had calmed. That didn't mean Brian had to sit around and suffer through it though.
“You're in pain, it will help take it away.”
“I can deal with the pain!” Brian shouts, then he jerks violently and grunts to keep from crying out.
“But you don't have to deal with it if you just take the fucking pills!” Dom might as well be arguing with a damn wall for all the headway he was making. Hell he could beat his head against one and probably get farther then he was now.
“I'm not some pathetic bitch that needs pills to take away shit I can't deal with! I'm not some fucker that needs a high to get through shit, I'm not that person. I'm not my mother!” Brian's sharp scream goes silent leaving the only sound in the room his harsh breathing. Those blue eyes that finally had some life back in them were looking around the room helplessly. As if for an escape.
Dom keeps quite for a few moments letting Brian's words sink in. Letting the realization wash over him. Dom had figured out with Brian had first started refusing any and all medication that he had been pissed with himself for using drugs. Ashamed even, Vince had told him about the talk the two had, had and Dom understood.
Brian was abandoned by his mother the moment she started using drugs. Sure she had been in the house with him, but if Dom had to guess she had spent so much time high the boy might as well been alone. Plus the hard reality that he found his mother dead in a bathtub with a needle in her arm didn't help the disgust Brian was feeling for himself.
“It's not pathetic to need a little help Bri.” Dom says quietly, he had been standing back from the bed since he came down but the panicked look on Brian's face had the bigger man sitting on the bed beside the blonde. Being so close Dom could see the muscle's under Brian's skin curl, tense and coil. Like snakes slithering under the surface.
When Brian opens his mouth to argue Dom lays his hand over the guys mouth. Brian's eyes narrow and Dom can see the wheels in his head turning but why he was silent Dom spoke.
“I don't know what it's like having a parent chose drugs over me.” Brian's eyes skitter away at that so Dom turns the guys head so he's looking at Dom once more. “It must of hurt I'm sure, and you were probably scared a lot.”
Brian's eyebrow twitches, a tell he has when someone hits an emotional sore spot.
“I wish to god you would have had someone in life to show you what it was like to be loved as a child.” Brian blinks hard, another tell Dom had picked up on. Since he had been back home Brian had done a lot of crying, then a lot of screaming a cursing because he was pissed about crying. But when Brian was trying to fight the urge to cry he gives a hard slow blink.
Dom is almost tempted to move his had away from Brian's mouth but he can still see the fight in Brian's eyes so he keeps it in place.
“I'm sorry you never had anyone to be the support you needed throughout life. But you did something amazing and took that shit hand life had dealt you and became a man that is loyal, strong and so fucking stubborn it's god damn maddening.” Brian rolls his eyes at that. “What you need to know is just because you stumbled once and picked up a drug habit does not mean you are pathetic. Everyone does shit they are ashamed of Bri. You, me everyone in this house has done something in life that they regret. The only thing you can do is learn from it. Just because you started using does not make you your mother, because I sure the hell know you would never abandon your family for drugs. You would never turn your back on us. We are the ones at fault here, not you.”
Brian mumbles something from behind Dom's hand and then huffs when the hand on his mouth doesn't move. Dom see's the mischief in his eyes one second to late before a warm tongue is sliding over the palm of his hand. Dom jerks his hand back and scowls at his wet palm while Brian laughs. The sound of his deep chuckle which Dom hadn't heard in months lifts a heavy weight of the mans heart.
Once Brian calms he sighs. “It's not anyone's here's fault I started using Dom.”
Dom whips the saliva of his palm on his jeans before looking up into those blue eyes. “It is, because if we hadn't pushed you away you would have never ended up in that part of town fighting to keep a roof over your head.”
Brian quickly shakes his head no. “I knew what I was getting into the moment I turned my back on my badge. Sure I had hoped a small bit that I wouldn't get caught I actually didn't but they were still suspicious so they took actions against me but I knew I wasn't going to get off with a slap on the wrist.”
“And the drugs.” Brian swallows. “Getting the shit kicked out of me during a fight night made it hard to sleep and drinking only did so much. When the drugs were offered up I thought what the fuck, it's not like I had anything left to lose. It didn't start off with Dilaudid, Vicodin at first but when the landlord got wind I was taking stuff for pain he started setting me up with bigger meaner fucks which turned into stronger drugs. It was a whole downward spiral from there.”
“I'm sorry.” Brian's head snaps to the side at that, blue eyes widening at Dom's apology.
“It's fine man.”
“It's not fine Bri, god if I could go back and let you explain. If I could have pulled my own head out of my ass you could have been at home with us the entire time.”
Brian licks his lips with what Dom could only call nervousness. “I have y'all now though right?”
“Yes Bri, you have us. Always.” Brian gives a smile that swiftly turns into a moan of pain when his body jerks. Dom stands and grabs the bottle of pills he had carried down with him. He pops on pill into his hand and moves back towards Brian.
Dom see's the hesitation, see's the guilt coming back into those blue eyes. “Brian, look at me.”
The blonde for once in these past few weeks does as he's told and looks up towards Dom. “If you can forgive us, you owe it to yourself to do the same thing.”
“Okay.” Brian whispers and when Dom hands over the pill he's relieved when its quickly swallowed down.
*-*-*-*-*-*
When the withdraw finally comes to an end its like a cloud that had been hanging over the Toretto house vanishes. Brian still has some rough days, a random spasm here and there and on occasion a rise in his temperature. He still avoids medication's even Advil, Vince doesn't take notice at first until he see's Brian one day who had started coming to the garage with them leaning against the car he had been working on.
His arm was wrapped around his head, covering his eyes but Vince can see from the set of his mouth that he's in pain. Concerned the dark haired man makes his way over and places a hand on the back of Brian's neck. Brian hadn't asked questions yet about why Vince was acting the way he was but he was sure it was coming soon. He could see them whirling in those shockingly blue eyes, he see's the lingering looks Brian gives him when Vince unaware touches the blonde as he passes.
“You okay Bri?”
Brian grunts and drops his arm. “Yea man, just have a headache.” Vince frowns concerned, he had been getting a lot of those lately.
“Have you taken something for it yet?” Brian tenses and Vince wants to curse how had he not noticed Brian hadn't been taking anything for his headaches?
“Bri.” Vince sighs. “It's okay to take something for a headache.”
“I... I know, it's just.” When the anxiety is clear in Brian's voice Vince pulls the blonde close by his neck till the two men are chest to chest. Brian looks flustered at the action but he doesn't pull back.
“It's just that your worried. It's okay, I will go get you two and you can take them. Is that okay? You know I'd never give you anything that wasn't safe.”
Brian searches Vince's eyes for something before he nods. “Okay.”
Vince fights the urge to kiss Brian's worried lips before he turns and heads to the office to dig in the first aid kit. When he finds what he's looking for he grabs a cold water bottle and brings both over to Brian who's covering his eyes with his arm again. Over the last two months Brian had put on a good amount of weight, he was still on the light side but since they got past the withdraw his apatite had picked back up greatly. So his arms were a little fuller and his cheeks not so sharp. He looked good, good enough to eat.
Vince presses the cold bottle against Brian's sweaty neck and enjoys hearing the happy sigh that pass's the blondes lips. When Brian drops his arm his eyes fall to the two small pills in Vince's hand there was a reluctance in his eyes but Vince quietly reassures him they are just over the counter Advil and with a nod Brian cracks the bottle of water open and swallows them down.
“If your in pain you come to me and I'll get you something okay?”
“Okay.” Brian agrees with only a moments pause.
*-*-*-*-*-*
That talk Vince had been waiting for comes one night when he crawls into bed next to Brian. At first Vince thinks Brian is already asleep but as soon as his weight settles under the blankets Brian shifts on the bed and opens his eyes to look at Vince.
“What is this?” When Vince raises a brow in question Brian explains. “This, you and I what is it? I use to think you hated me because you thought I wanted Mia but I told you that wasn't the case, but you...” Brian pauses. “You don't act like you want Mia. You've been touching me a lot too and honestly man it's confusing as fuck.”
Vince chuckles. “I don't want Mia.”
“Yes, so we have established but why haven't you kicked me out of your bed yet?”
“I want you in my bed.” Vince wasn't one to beat around the bush, he was all about telling it like it was. Brian looks so astonished, lost even by Vince's words that for a moment Vince thinks he made a mistake about telling Brian that. In all this musing about wanting Brian with him he never considered Brian might not want him in that way.
“You want me?”
“Yes.” Vince says surprisingly nervous, he hadn't felt this way since he was in the fifth grade and telling Mindy Lax that he had a crush on her.
“You want me.” Brian repeats his eyes searching. “In what way?”
Vince wasn't really a man that was good with words and he honestly didn't want to fuck this up by trying to say what he felt. So in a very Vince manner he attacks suddenly, his hand whipping out to grab Brian around the back of his neck and pulls the smaller man into a kiss.
Brian doesn't disappoint, and fuck Vince is doomed because the blonde doesn't even hesitate deepening the kiss, his own hand locking around Vince's neck. It's not really a fight on who's in charge, Vince easily controls the kiss by leaning up and over Brian the slightest bit. Their hips resting against one another. The kiss is wild and sloppy and filled with god knows how much sexual tension that when Vince grinds his hard cock into Brian's the man under him moans.
That sweet sound has Vince pulling back, but Brian's hips jerk up seeking friction, rubbing against Vince that he groans. He hadn't intended on going this far this fast but Brian looked so blissed out, eyes hooded and needy that Vince attacks those pretty lips once more.
He drops his hips harder into Brian, using his free hand to hold the slender smooth hip under him. Tongues sliding and learning one another mouths soft sighs and Brian's fingers in his hair has Vince hips rolling on their own accord over Brian's each slow hard slide has Brian's hips bucking up towards him.
The hand on Brian's hips traces upwards under Brian's shirt, feeling the jagged scars, smoothing over them lovingly. Brian gives a low moan when Vince's mapping fingers brush his nipple, and Vince is so cocky about the fact he could pull such a please sound out of Brian that he does it again.
The two men are so engorged in one another it wasn't until someone clears their throat loudly do they jerk apart pants loudly. Both men are hard, and Brian's pretty skin is flushed and his eyes are needy and Vince is pissed. He whips his head around to glare at the intruder while Brian pushes his self up on his elbows.
The entire household was standing in Vince and Brian's room. Leon is blinking at them eyes moving between each man on the bed like he's not understanding what he's seeing. Mia is smiling, Jesse's mouth has hit the floor, Letty is watching curiously and Dom looks like he's trying not to laugh.
“Can I fucking help you?” Vince snarls out. What the fuck was this shit? It was midnight, why the hell were they all down here?
“Oh, well there was banging.” Jesse say's finally pulling his jaw off the floor.
Vince raises a brow at that.
“The bed dumbass.” Letty says pointing towards the head board against the wall. Vince and Brian must look confused because Mia tacks on after Letty.
“You two were just dry humping each other so hardcore you had the bed frame slamming against the wall.” Mia says it so casually like talking about the weather that it's almost embarrassing.
“We got worried about the sound.” Jesse finishes.
“Well you didn't all have to come and fucking investigate! And you all could have turned your asses around when you saw what was happening!” Assholes' Vince wants to scream out, his family were cock blocking assholes. It wasn't till he notices Brian is scary silent does Vince quickly turn his head to check on him.
He had expected to find the man embarrassed at their actions but his eyes are narrowed, his jaw is set and his eyes are burning with something that was close to a cunning need that Vince feel's like he's about to be very amused.
And like a very Brian move the man doesn't disappoint, he sits up slowly eyes on their family, and once he's up he tilts his head to the side slightly. Then Vince can see the mischief and sudden smirk on Brian's lips.
“I was about to come.” Brian sounds so angry that didn't happen that Vince has to fight not to laugh. “I would still very much like to come so unless you want to watch Vince take me.” Brian gives a sweet smile that is anything but trusting. “I suggest you quickly move along.”
Leon is the first one to bolt up the stairs and he drags a very flushed Jesse up with him. Mia shakes her head and heads up as well and Dom finally gave up his need to not laugh because he gives a sharp barking laugh as he pulls Letty away who looked like she wouldn't mind staying to watch.
Brian turns towards Vince and grins. Its the smile he always wore after a race, rather he won or lost. A shit eating grin that was infectious because Vince finds himself smiling back not only because Brian smiling made others want to smile in return but because Vince had been worried a few weeks back that he would never get to see it again.
“Our family just fucking cock blocked our asses.” Vince says with a pout now.
Brian's smile only widens at that. “Well I'm all for continuing were we left off V.”
“Let's move the fucking bed first.”
Brian's loud laughter fills the room.
