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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “We’ve made a trade,” Coach announces. “For Shane Hollander.”

    It’s like the ground drops out from beneath Ilya, and his heart falls from his chest. It tumbles past rock bottom, down to the cavern that shattered open inside of him on that night five years ago. The night when Ilya walked away from Hollander for the last time.

    He can’t breathe.

    (Or: Shane doesn’t get hurt, they break up, and they don’t talk for five long years. Until Shane is traded to Ottawa.)

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    24 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “What were you doing?”

    “Oh.” A sweet flush colours Shane’s freckled cheeks, and his fingers twitch where they’re still resting on Ilya’s back. “I was just tracing your moles.”

    Ilya is going to die. His heart is actually going to give out on him because of this sweet, perfect man who he loves more than he knows what to do with. Who he loves more than anything in this entire world.

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    23 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “We’re just, well-“ Choui hedges, then glances round as if he’s looking for back up.

    “We’re worried that you’re a bit too controlling,” Hayes blurts out. “Of Rozanov.”

    Shane opens his mouth to respond, but he closes it again when he realises he has no fucking idea what to say. He’s - what?

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    23 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “You are my friend, Hayden, but he is the man I am going to spend the rest of my life with - he is the man that I love. I will choose him over you, every fucking time.”

    Over anything and everything, Shane would choose Ilya. Even over hockey, if it came to that. There’s no doubt in his mind, no question about it.

    Losing hockey would hurt, and Shane would grieve it, but it wouldn’t kill him. It would be an ache he could live with. Losing Ilya is not something that Shane could ever survive. They’re so tangled together - so intertwined - that to lose Ilya would be to lose himself.

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    23 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya had told Shane to leave because they needed space - they needed some room to catch their breath so they could talk about things properly. So they could say sorry and fix the mess they had made. But one day apart stretched into two, into three, into a week, and suddenly Shane was on the other end of the phone, saying, ”Maybe this isn’t going to work, Ilya.”

    At least Ilya is good at that part; he’s an expert in being left behind.

     

    (Or, Ilya and Shane breakup. Then the Centaurs’ plane almost crashes.)

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    22 Jun 2026