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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane and Ilya are different behind closed doors.
    A multi POV fic that allows other characters to get a glimpse behind the wall.

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    30 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Yuna’s entire body aches, and it would appear that her instincts were right— Rozanov is small, and he’s vulnerable, and he’s tired, and he needed somewhere safe to rest.

    And Yuna can’t help the weird sense that she’s honoured— her home was somewhere for Rozanov to go, even if she and David knew nothing about any of it, even if they still don’t, Shane knew it would be safe for Rozanov here. Shane told him to come home.

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    30 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “I’m sorry,” Shane chokes, closing his eyes. Rozanov draws his hand, pulling Shane’s with it, to his face and wipes his cheeks.

    “There is nothing to be sorry for, любовь моя, it is okay,” Rozanov murmurs, tugging at Shane’s hair again. Shane exhales, letting him clean his cheeks. “You got overwhelmed, yes? It happens.”

    “I can’t be fucking normal,” Shane says quietly, whining, head falling back, pressing into Rozanov’s hand.

    “No, if you were fucking normal, you would not be my Shane.”

    // shane is a liar, and he's tired of it all. his life falls apart, and he finds that he doesn't actually mind.

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    30 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    The first sound Ilya hears is a thin, discordant symphony of beeps and whirs. Something vibrating. 

    The next thing he hears is…wet. A sort of shaking, gargling sound, that feels like the ugliest crying he’s ever heard. And through it, Shane’s voice. 

    “I’m with him now, mom. He’s— he’s not fine. He’s not. I know—”

    Ilya wants to ask who's not fine, but he can’t feel his own body, his mouth, enough to ask.

    “Yeah,” Shane is saying, only slightly calmer. “I know. He wasn’t breathing—"

    Ilya knows there's a link, between the clinical musicality of medical settings, Shane’s audible, awful distress, and his own physical incapacity. It’s just, it’s so tenuous, and the air around him is so thick, so heavy. It would be easy, to sleep, a little. 

    -
    Footage of the last game between Ottawa and Montreal is everywhere; it’s breached containment from the sports world, and now it seems like everyone is baying for Montreal’s blood. Except, Ilya is oblivious. Not exactly blissfully so, but as the fight for accountability within the league rages on without him, Ilya just wants someone, anyone, to tell him what happened.

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    26 May 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “-can’t see each other again,” Ilya says, looking only at Shane’s hand, holding it so, so gently and stroking over Shane’s skin so, so softly. The soothing feeling of it makes it very hard to focus, but Shane tries very hard to do it anyway. “I tried-we tried, but this can’t happen again.” It takes a moment, but Shane finally manages to make sense of the words, and he lets out a soft noise of understanding.

    Ah. He’s apologizing that he won’t be able to see Shane in the hospital again before he leaves.

    “I understand,” he says, and he does. It was probably really hard for Ilya to get here even once, and it can’t be very long before his plane leaves. He’s sad, of course–they didn’t even get to spend time together, really–but it’s not like this will be the last chance they ever have to see each other. He gives Ilya his best attempt at a smile, and if it comes out a little sad, too, all Ilya does is reach out to stroke the backs of his fingers gently over his cheek.

    (ilya goes through with his plan to break up with shane in the hospital) (the problem? shane is too high to understand that he's being broken up with)

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    21 May 2026