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When you here who Izuku’s feeding next you’re going to think he’s stupid, insane, and suicidal. And to be fair he probably is. But! This was the only way Izuku could think of to truly get Shigiraki on his side. He was also kinda doing it for shits and giggles. He was sure if he thought hard enough, he could find a way to get Shigiraki on his side, probably by getting into his whole tragic backstory and shit. But he didn’t want to think hard right now, he was too tired for that shit.
By now you’re probably like “Izuku! Who are you feeding!?”
Well you impatient fucks, he’s feeding someone who technically wants him dead. Yup, it’s the one and only All For One!... Yeah… Not Izuku’s smart idea. But it is what it is, Izuku was suicidal anyway. Also, this would 100% be something he laughs about later in life, or something he cringes at.
Izuku smiles up at Kurogiri. Kurogiri stares back down at him blankly.
Izuku clears his throat before speaking in a deep voice, “take me to your boss.”
“Tomura?” Kurogiri questions.
Izuku simply smiles up at the man.
“Please let it be Tomura,” Kurogiri pleads.
“It’s not Shigiraki,” Izuku says cheerfully. “I want to speak with All For One.”
Kurogiri pulls what Izuku is going to call his deadpan face.
“Are you suicidal?” Kurogiri demands.
“Yes, but that doesn’t matter,” Izuku waves Kurogiri off.
“He’ll kill you without a second thought,” Kurogiri states.
“Maybe, but I have some edible cookie dough and Coca—Cola that I plan to give him before I die,” Izuku says shrugging.
“Izuku! There is no fucking way you’re doing that!” Dabi exclaims once he had finally broken out of his shock. “He’ll kill you!”
“Mama ain’t raise no bitch,” Izuku smirks looking slightly insane. “Well… She barely raised me at all so I guess it’s more like, I ain’t raise no bitch.” He faces Kurogiri again and points at the misty man. “Kurogiri open the portal!”
“Giri don’t you fucking dare,” Dabi growls.
“Hit me up Kurogiri!” Izuku says slapping his chest.
“Kurogiri!” Dabi says threateningly fire dancing across the skin on his arms.
A portal opens up beside Izuku. The green haired teen grins manically at the sight and hops into it immediately.
“Kurogiri you motherfu—” Dabi’s yell gets cut off as the portal closes behind Izuku.
Izuku stubbles slightly as he lands on the other side, but he’s quick to recover. His eyes immediately land on All For One sitting on a comfy looking bed hooked up to a bunch of machines, a few beeping annoyingly.
“Sup old man,” Izuku greets straightening himself. “I brought food.”
“Why are you here young hero?” All For One demands sitting up in bed.
“To give you food and chill as we have a nice little chat,” Izuku states taking a few steps towards All For One’s bed.
“You do know I can kill you easily,” All For One threatens.
“Hey, don’t make me pull the plug!” Izuku threatens right back wagging a finger in All For One’s direction. Izuku digs around in his backpack before pulling out a can of Coca—Cola. “Have come Cola.”
“I will do no such thing,” All For One snaps. “Tell me why you’re here.”
“I’ll tell you why I’m here when you take the god damned fucking Cola,” Izuku huffs in annoyance.
“Fine!” All For One exclaims snatching the Coca—Cola from Izuku’s hands. Izuku couldn’t help but think he looked and sounded like a child.
All For One opens the can of Cola with a pout and takes an annoyed sip. Izuku stares at him with an unimpressed look. For a man who wanted so desperately to have his quirk and kill him he was doing an awfully bad job.
“Was that so hard?” Izuku smirks.
“I can and will kill you,” All For One snaps pointing an annoyed finger at Izuku.
“Sure, old man,” Izuku rolls his eyes.
“Hey! I am not old!” All For One looks at Izuku with what the green haired boy is going to assume was supposed to be a glare. To be fair, a glare must be hard to do when you only had one third of your face.
“When were you born?” Izuku asks a cheeky smile on his face.
“2000,” All For One states.
The smile on Izuku’s face drops. Damn, AFO really was old. Izuku would think he’d have died by now, but somehow, he’s still here. Sure, he is hooked up to a ton of machines, but he is still living. Izuku was sure that he would 100% be dead by now if he was in All For One’s situation, not because someone would have killed him by now, but because he would have killed himself. Who the hell would want to live as long as this dude?
“Okay…” Izuku says slowly. “Let me tell you why I’m here.”
All For One frowns. “Am I really that old?” All For One mumbles to himself. “I didn’t think it was that old.”
Oh, poor man, he’s delusional.
“I need your help to convince the League of Villains to help me do illegal shit,” Izuku states rummaging through his backpack.
All For One stares at him. “You came here, to a man who wants to kill you and take your quirk, ridiculed said man, and then asked him to help you commit crimes?”
“Yeah,” Izuku says smiling up at All For One. “That’s about it.”
“You have to have mental issues,” All For One deadpans.
“I do,” Izuku says holding out a container of edible cookie dough to All For One.
“That explains it,” All For One sighs, he takes the container and just rests it in his lap.
“So… Will you help me?” Izuku asks.
“Sure, why the hell not?” All For One slumps back into his bed.
“Wait, really?!” Izuku exclaims. “It’s that easy?!”
“Yup,” All For One shrugs. All For One points to the container of edible cookie dough Izuku had given him. “What’s this?”
“Edible cookie dough,” Izuku says in what he thinks is probably shock. “Why would you agree so easily?”
“I’m bored and you got me food,” All For One says passively. “And I really like food.”
“Oh… Same,” Izuku says.
All For One pauses in the middle of taking a bite of edible cookie dough. “What time is it?”
“3:40 something am I think,” Izuku answers.
“Shouldn’t you be home sleeping?” All For One asks.
“Nah,” Izuku waves All For One off. “I normally don’t get very much sleep at nights.”
“You should go home and sleep,” All For One says.
“You’re just going to let me go?” Izuku demands shocked.
“Yeah,” All For One says. He pushes a button on the side of his bed.
“You’re a weird person, do you have multiple personalities or some shit?” Izuku says pulling a face.
“Maybe,” All For One says passively.
A portal opens just behind Izuku. Izuku doesn’t seem to notice it so All For One sits up a little and simply pushes the boy through it. Izuku lands on his back hard on the other side. He lays there staring at the ceiling for a while wondering what the fuck just happened. He blinks blurrily up at the ceiling before slowly sitting up.
“Oh my god! Izuku!” Dabi’s suddenly on his knees in front of Izuku looking very worried.
“Sup man?” Izuku smirks.
Dabi gives him an incredulous look. “You walked to what was supposed to be your death, come back, and that’s all you have to say?!”
“Yeah,” Izuku shrugs standing up.
“How?” Dabi demands.
“All For One liked the food I got him,” Izuku smiles. “Just like you and everyone else did.”
“I hate you so much,” Dabi deadpans.
“I do too,” Izuku retorts. “Anyway, I gots to get back to the dorms, don’t need Aizawa—Sensei to know about my nightly excursions.”
Dabi sighs and slumps forward. He runs a hand down his face. “I’m glad you’re alive kid.”
“Thanks,” Izuku smiles softly.
Breaking: Mystery boy feeds man who swore to kill him and survives!
Omakes
AFO: I like you; I’m not going to try and kill you and get your quirk. I guess I’m gonna have to wait until you pass it on.
Izuku: Then I just won’t pass it on, how bout that
AFO:…
AFO: my plan has been foiled.
Izuku: *snaps fingers sassily*
/\/\/\/\
Zawa: You okay Problem Child?
Izu: *shocked that he survived AFO* yeah, just in shock I think
Zawa: that isn’t concerning at all.
/\/\/\/\
First: *watching Izuku’s interaction with his brother* NOOOOOOOO!!!! WHYYYYY!! IT COULD HAVE BEEN ANYONE ELSE!! ANYONE!! WHY NINE??!?!!? WHYYYYYY
Second: *pats First’s shoulder as he sobs* How could you Nine?
