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After walking through the portal back to the Boiling Isles, Hunter couldn’t even bring himself to be shocked by all the damage, like the others no doubt were. Everything sounded like he was underwater, and he was barely watching where he was going. It was like he was on autopilot.
He could vaguely hear the others talking all around him, but he couldn’t make out anything that was being said. He could barely even think. As Hunter walked mechanically through the wreckage of the Isles, the only thing he could think to himself over and over was:
You killed him.
You killed him.
You killed him.
It echoed inside his head, bouncing all around the walls. Hunter was sure he was about to go insane if it didn’t stop soon. But somehow at the same time, he felt empty. He hated himself for it. Flap was a part of him now and he felt empty?
Hunter stumbled for a moment, remembering that not only was Flapjack dead by his own hand, but the palisman was now inside of him. He’d consumed his palisman.
Just like Belos.
You really are a monster.
Before he could fall, Hunter felt arms around him, and he was momentarily brought back. Willow came into focus, and although he could now hear without feeling like he was underwater, he couldn’t shake the ringing in his ears.
“Are you okay?” Willow asked.
Hunter knew she was asking because he’d almost fallen, but he also knew the hidden question was there as well. Was he okay from everything else that had happened tonight?
He made an affirmative noise, unable to speak, and hoped that would be enough. Luckily, it seemed to work, since after that, no one asked him anything else. Struggling to come back to his senses, Hunter tried to get somewhat of an idea where on the Isles they were, but his brain didn’t seem to be working. Where were they? Why couldn’t he think?
Hunter must have completely blanked out for a while, because the next thing he knew, someone was gently shaking his shoulder.
“Baby, we’re here.” Hunter looked up to the sound of Camila’s voice and saw an old, dilapidated building in front of them. It took him a moment to recognize it, but Hunter realized the building was The Owl House itself. Having only been there once before, Hunter could barely see the resemblance.
Had The Collector already been there?
Willow and Amity moved the door, which had been knocked off its hinges, so they could all easily get inside. Hunter realized he must not have began walking, since he felt himself being guided into the home.
The inside looked just as rough as the outside, and Hunter knew he should probably start cleaning it up. If they were going to be hiding out here until they could come up with a plan, surely they couldn’t leave it like this? Well, he probably could, but he didn’t think the others would want to.
He watched as Luz and Amity went upstairs. From the way Luz was tearfully yelling “Eda!” and “King!”, she was searching for them.
Knowing it wasn’t likely they would find anyone else here, Hunter figured it would be best to get a head start on cleaning up the place. He could feel the exhaustion down to his bones, and everything burned. He wanted more than anything to just go to sleep and not wake up, but he needed to help. It was ingrained in him.
Hunter moved to work through some of the destruction, picking up and moving aside various pieces of rubble. He’d barely been at work for a second and his body already burned, but worse than that, he mind was back to tormenting him.
You killed him.
You’re not a person.
You’re a monster.
He almost wanted to laugh. After finally feeling good about himself and happy for the first time ever in the human realm, look at where he was now. Worse than ever. His body broken, mind tormenting him, his best friend gone forever, and unable to stop thinking about how he was living in a stolen body.
“Hey, hey, what are you doing?” Hunter continued to clean, not realizing the voice was directed at him until there were hands touching him, and pulling him away from his work. He was getting good at that. Looking up, he could see once again that Camila had come over to him, a concerned look on her face.
“Cleaning. If we’re going to stay here, we can’t live like this.” Hunter gestured around to the wreckage, “It’s destroyed.”
“No. You almost died, Hunter. The rest of us can take care of this, you need to rest.”
Hunter shook his head, ready to argue, but Camila shushed him.
“Please, I don’t want to you hurt yourself more. You need to rest.”
Realizing that continuing to ignore her would probably make the woman more upset, Hunter decided to listen. Sighing in defeat, he looked around, and noticed that Luz and Amity had come back, both looking as miserable as he felt. Guess they didn’t find Eda and King.
“Alright.” Hunter said, turning back to Camila. Then he realized he had no idea what to do, “Um… where should I go?”
He realized it was a stupid question, but more than anything he just needed guidance right now. He needed someone to tell him what to do.
The voice in the back of his mind told him that what he really needed more than anything right now was Flapjack, but he pushed it deeper inside himself. If he thought about it for too long, he would breakdown, and he couldn’t do that.
Instead of Camila answering him, Luz walked over and rested a hand on his arm. Hunter almost flinched, but held himself back. That would only make Luz feel worse.
“You can sleep in my old room, I’ll show you.”
For once, Hunter didn’t need to be guided along, and he followed Luz silently upstairs as she showed him where he would sleep. Hunter wondered if any of the others would also come to Luz’s room later to sleep as well, but he didn’t ask.
He didn’t want to be alone, but he didn’t trust himself. Belos was somewhere on the Isles, lurking. What if he came back and took over his body again? The thought made him shake.
“Alright, that’s my room, and across the hall right there is the bathroom. If you need it.”
Hunter looked inside the room, seeing the scattered remnants of Luz’s things that were still there. He also looked, making sure he knew where the bathroom was. He could feel the hair tickling the back of his neck and was hoping he would find some scissors to cut it with.
Luz looked like she wanted to ask him something, before deciding against it. Hunter was thankful.
“Just come and get us if you need anything, okay?” Hunter nodded. “Goodnight.”
Hunter didn’t say anything back, just watched Luz walk away.
As soon as she was out of sight, Hunter ducked into the bathroom. His body was about to shut down, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to get a moment of sleep if he could feel the hair touching the back of his neck. It would have been a smart decision to ask Willow to cut it again, but he couldn’t bring himself to bother her with something he could do himself.
Hunter quickly rifiled through the various drawers, and somehow, actually found a scissor. Thankful, he grabbed it and looked into the mirror, getting ready to cut.
And that’s when he saw them.
Flapjack’s eyes.
The scissors dropped to the floor with a clang, but Hunter barely heard it over the ringing in his ears, which was back again and ten times louder.
He blinked again and again, hoping that somehow with the stress of everything that happened today, he was simply hallucinating. Having some kind of breakdown.
But the more he looked, the longer it stayed the same. And he knew he wasn’t seeing things.
It seemed in one moment, all the control he’d been struggling to keep erupted. His breath was coming out in rattling gasps, and tears were falling down his face. Soon enough, he was sobbing and screaming.
“Get them out! Get them out!” Hunter was desperate, clawing at his eyes, hoping that somehow if he pulled them out, Flapjack would come back. He didn’t need to see; he needed Flap. The idea was obviously insane, but his mind was in shambles.
Hunter sunk to the floor, unable to remain standing anymore, just as he heard a slam and footsteps.
“Baby, what’s wrong?” Camila’s voice echoed around him, but he couldn’t even begin to explain himself. He could only keep sobbing and screaming.
“I killed him!”
“Baby, no you didn’t. He wanted to save you. He really did.”
“My eyes are his, not mine! They’re his!” Hunter felt his hands going up to his hair this time instead of his eyes, and he began pulling. The pain felt good. It distracted him from why he was really upset.
There was silence, and Hunter realized that everyone would have already seen his eyes change.
“I want him back.” Hunter sobbed.
Why did this have to happen? He was finally happy. He was so happy and now everything was ruined.
“I know it’s shocking, but I don’t think it’s bad.” Hunter heard Willow’s voice and opened his eyes. Seeing that everyone, not just Camila, had come to the bathroom to check on him, filled him with embarrassment, but he ignored it.
Hunter simply looked to Willow, willing her to finish her thought. He needed to know how this wasn’t bad. He didn’t think it was possible.
“Flapjack loved you and now he’s a part of you. You’ll carry him and his memory with you forever.”
Hunter shook his head, “I don’t want a memory, I want him.”
“I know, I know it hurts. But we’re here for you.” Willow continued.
“Please don’t bottle yourself up like this again. If you need to talk to us, if you need to cry, please do it.” Camila added.
Hunter nodded, unable to say anything in return. He took the advice though and continued to cry. Everything still hurt, but somehow, releasing it made him feel a little less hopeless. Less lost. All six of them remained on the bathroom floor as Hunter allowed himself to cry and let out his pain. He had no idea how long it took, but by the time he was done, he felt something different. The hollow, empty feeling inside him still hadn’t gone away, and he doubted it would anytime soon, if ever, but he felt loved now and it was starting to fill up his heart.
Finally calm enough to talk once again, Hunter spoke up, “Thanks.”
Camila helped him off the ground, and led him back to Luz’s old room. Once he’d settled in, Willow sat next to him.
“I saw the scissors on the ground. I can cut your hair again tomorrow if you want?” She whispered to him.
Hunter nodded, “I’d like that, thanks.”
Seeing that no one appeared to be leaving, Hunter spoke up confused, “Are you guys not leaving?”
“We thought about it and it’s probably best if everyone stays together. After everything that happened tonight, we should have each other for support.” Luz told him. Hunter knew that wasn’t the whole truth, considering the only thing that had changed from when they’d first arrived at the house until now was his breakdown in the bathroom, but he could appreciate that they were trying to make him feel better by not singling him out.
Hunter wanted to thank them again, but the exhaustion was finally starting to take control of his mind. He saw darkness rapidly closing in, and laid down, trying to get comfortable. He could hear quiet conversation around him, but it quickly became too faint to distinguish anything and sleep began to take over.
The last thing he felt before the darkness took over completely was warmth in his chest and the fluttering of wings.