lil_mrskle



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "Why are you not scared?"

    "I am scared," Ilya admits. "I just am tired. Of hiding me. Of hiding you. Of hiding how much I love you. I want to go to the rink— how do you say it? Authenti."

    "Authentically," Shane supplies, automatically.

    "Yes. Authentically. I want to go to the rink authentically, as me," Ilya confirms.

    Ilya looks at Shane, pauses until Shane meets his eyes. "I want to say: I, Ilya Rozanov, love a man, and that man's name is Shane Hollander."

     

    -

    Or, sometimes it takes a little more time, and some courage, to be with the one you love.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    81,933
    Chapters:
    9/9
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    21,105
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    07 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    In Vegas, after they’d said everything right up to the edge of I love you, Shane and Ilya came up with a plan. It was long term, with many, many steps. There might be a spreadsheet somewhere that Shane won’t admit to.

    But it’s a plan, nonetheless. Over the summer of 2014, they tweak it and add things important to the both of them. There are even many, extensive, contingency plans.

    OR

    Thanks to Shane's small lie the first time they hooked up, Shane and Ilya are together years earlier. Now, they have to figure out what to do about it.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    95,714
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Collections:
    21
    Comments:
    4,367
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    22,442
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    6,387
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    29 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “Come on, you’re telling me you wouldn’t consider sneaking into a storage closet with me?”

    “Obviously, I would!” Eddie was whisper-yelling now, and Buck wasn’t sure exactly what point he was trying to make, but he was enjoying every second of this. “But one of us is going to have to have restraint and it has to be the—the one with the most experience.”

    Buck felt his mouth drop open in delight. “Eddie,” he admonished. “Are you calling me a whore?”

    “No!” said Eddie, looking increasingly flustered. “I just mean—clearly you have the power to do—” he gestured at Buck, “that, so you have the—the responsibility to, like, use it. Responsibly.”

    “Did you just quote Spiderman?”

    Eddie propped his elbows on the table and dropped his head into his hands, groaning dramatically. “I’m going to die. The first date, and I’m going to die.”

    “Been there, wouldn’t recommend it.”

    ---

    Buck and Eddie and the first date.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,690
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    359
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    04 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    2014: Ilya Rozanov shocks the world and breaks Shane Hollander’s heart by disappearing without explanation, and without a goodbye kiss.

    2024: A devastating injury forces Shane to retire early, so he moves to a small town to coach girls hockey and figure out what the hell to do with the rest of his life.

    When recently divorced Ilya Rozanov walks into the rink with his twin girls, Shane has to decide if he’s brave enough to risk a second chance on a broken heart, and a rekindled romance with the first and only boy he ever loved.

    ***

    “So.” Ilya cleared his throat. “Should we tell the girls their Papa and their coach used to date?”

    “We didn’t date. We hooked up a few times, then you disappeared.” Shane looked away to hide his heartbreak as he lied, “It doesn’t even matter. It’s not like I loved you or anything.”

    “No, of course not.” Ilya tried to smile through a lie of his own, “I didn’t love you either.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    296,453
    Chapters:
    18/?
    Comments:
    8,779
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    17,826
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    902,329

    29 Apr 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Newly traded to the Ottawa Centaurs, Ilya Rozanov is so close to having everything he’d never thought he was allowed to want. He can see the man he loves more than four times a year, he’s surrounded by a team who supports him through his injury, and Shane’s parents have unhesitatingly accepted him as part of the family.

    Except his lingering concussion symptoms have kept him sidelined from hockey, his boyfriend is still two hours away, their schedules are a disaster, and Shane’s team is, well…it’s full of assholes. There must be a way to make this all work out.

    or

    A sequel to a whump fanfiction with more whump…that is also, secretly, a fix-it.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,450
    Chapters:
    20/20
    Collections:
    9
    Comments:
    7,033
    Kudos:
    21,151
    Bookmarks:
    4,000
    Hits:
    373,897

    17 Apr 2026