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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “You sweet, oblivious man. Do you not realise that Ilya Rozanov was trying to ask you on a date?” Rose says incredulously.

    “That’s ridiculous!” Shane laughs in disbelief. “I can’t believe you are arguing with me over the phrasing of a dinner invite. That’s…barely a technicality.”

    “We’re lawyers, Shane! Everything is a fucking technicality!”

    Shane Hollander is a divorce attorney who does not do relationships. Then his newest client, hockey superstar Ilya Rozanov, walks into his office.

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    22 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Marlow: UHHHH
    Connors: GOOD LORD
    Carmichael: WHAT THE HELL CAP?
    Ilya: Oops
    Ilya: Wrong chat
    Ilya: Obviously
    Ilya: You’re welcome though 😏

    Or: A handful of times Shane and Ilya accidentally send sexts to a group chat, +1 time they sext in a group chat on purpose

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    19 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane Hollander comes out. Half the league shoot their shot online.

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    16 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    @IlyaRozanovOfficial✅ Happy to announce that I WILL be pounding Shane Hollander tonight! That ass is MINE!

    @CliffMarleau✅Brother, please ask me before you post shit like this.

    @BostonWAGOneDay pounding him into… the boards… right? RIGHT?

    @HollanderBabe24 in my dreams 🙏🙏🙏

    @HockeyFan81 PLEASE have someone proof-read this man’s Tweets.

    @IllyaRozanovOfficial✅ what is ‘proof-read’? Internet tells me this mean
    fix errors. What error? I said what I said.

    @HockeyFan81 I’M SCREAMING

    OR: Instead of just hooking up at the CCM shoot, Shane and Ilya start a serious relationship the summer before their rookie season. They are not public about their relationship, but Ilya sees no reason to lie when people ask him what he thinks of his biggest rival. Maybe it’s the Russian accent, though, because for some reason, everyone thinks he's joking.

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    11 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    SHANE HOLLANDER, center, Ottawa Centaurs; Gerald's owner: Gerald was started on September 14th, 2009, at approximately 4:30 in the afternoon. I used a combination of organic rye flour and filtered water at 78 degrees Fahrenheit. The ambient kitchen temperature was 71 degrees, which is within the acceptable range for initial fermentation, though the lower end. I kept detailed notes. I still have them.

    [He showed me the notes. They are in a composition notebook, written in small, precise handwriting. The first entry reads: "Day 1. Mixed 50g rye flour + 50g water (78°F). Covered with cloth. Placed on counter away from direct sunlight. No activity yet. Expected." There are years of entries. The notebook is the third volume.]

    SHANE HOLLANDER: I don't understand the question. Why wouldn't I keep notes?

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    09 Jul 2026