eldritchbhoen



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane says, “You don’t wanna go raw?”

    Ilya drops the box of condoms. Looks at Shane. Shane looks back.

    “What?”

    “Do you want me to commit a felony?”

    “I think public indecency is usually a misdemeanor.”

    Ilya tries to bite him through his shirt.

    “Ow, ow, Ilya, stop that-”

    Ilya and Shane are thirty-five, married, and living their best happily ever after—until the plane they're in falls out of the sky and they wake up back in 2009. Of course they fuck about it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,801
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    84
    Kudos:
    1,651
    Bookmarks:
    276
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    7,944

    09 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Kip grabs Scott's thigh as he watches Shane lick his lips before tucking his smile back between his teeth. Rozanov meets Shane's eyes from across the room, heated and promising something. Kip feels crazy looking at it being reminded of the tension of their face offs. Shane's eyes drop back to the bland chicken on his plate, and Kip is ready to write this off as a figment of his imagination, when Rozanov catches his eye now and winks.

    Scott is going to have five tiny bruises on his thigh. But that doesn't seem to bother him. "Everything okay?"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,408
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    605
    Bookmarks:
    116
    Hits:
    3,261

    30 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “Ilya, what are we gonna do?” Shane says.

    Ilya finishes whatever he has been doing on his phone, and tosses it gently to the bed beside him. He crosses the room to Shane, stands in front of him, squeezes into his shoulders with his big hands, rubbing them like he means to warm them up.

    “Looks like we will have a little vacation,” he says, with a big obnoxious grin.

     


     

    Boston and Montreal are sent to Paris to play against each other in an exhibition series in January 2017. Ilya and Shane decide to stay in Paris for one more night. Just one more night, so they can talk. Maybe finally understand each other.

    They aren't expecting a volcano to erupt in Iceland and close all the airspace in Europe, leaving them stranded there. Together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    127,267
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Comments:
    5,213
    Kudos:
    21,002
    Bookmarks:
    9,064
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    672,828

    27 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    The first sound Ilya hears is a thin, discordant symphony of beeps and whirs. Something vibrating. 

    The next thing he hears is…wet. A sort of shaking, gargling sound, that feels like the ugliest crying he’s ever heard. And through it, Shane’s voice. 

    “I’m with him now, mom. He’s— he’s not fine. He’s not. I know—”

    Ilya wants to ask who's not fine, but he can’t feel his own body, his mouth, enough to ask.

    “Yeah,” Shane is saying, only slightly calmer. “I know. He wasn’t breathing—"

    Ilya knows there's a link, between the clinical musicality of medical settings, Shane’s audible, awful distress, and his own physical incapacity. It’s just, it’s so tenuous, and the air around him is so thick, so heavy. It would be easy, to sleep, a little. 

    -
    Footage of the last game between Ottawa and Montreal is everywhere; it’s breached containment from the sports world, and now it seems like everyone is baying for Montreal’s blood. Except, Ilya is oblivious. Not exactly blissfully so, but as the fight for accountability within the league rages on without him, Ilya just wants someone, anyone, to tell him what happened.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    90,785
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    1,806
    Kudos:
    6,654
    Bookmarks:
    2,528
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    167,019

    14 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya Rozanov has been drafted by Boston, the number one pick overall, but his father doesn't want him moving to America and so takes steps to block his visa. He's going to have to go back to Russia and stay there forever and that, thinks Shane Hollander, is wrong.

    It's so wrong that Shane can't stop himself from doing something about it. Even though that something is the most reckless, the only reckless thing he's ever done in his life. He marries Rozanov in secret, to keep him out of Russia and put him on a path to Canadian citizenship.

    Shane's got a five-year plan to get him there and when you have a plan nothing can go wrong. Right? Right. When you have a solid plan and a marriage that's on paper only there's no risk of feelings getting involved. Not on Rozanov's part and certainly not on Shane's.

    Right???

    (or, the story of how Shane Hollander fell in love with his own husband)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    154,290
    Chapters:
    22/22
    Comments:
    7,470
    Kudos:
    25,387
    Bookmarks:
    10,286
    Hits:
    893,288

    12 Jun 2026