ashan_02



Recent bookmarks

  1. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov has a gift.

    He can speak to animals, which has earned him an incredibly successful career as a pet psychic, and far too much information about what people do when they think their pets aren’t watching.

    Shane Hollander has a problem.

    His cat, Pork, is permanently miserable. After exhausting every sensible option, Shane turns to the supernatural for assistance.

    After their first appointment, Pork grows visibly happier - his cat’s found a hobby and renewed sense of purpose for achieving his only goal: to destroy Ilya for good.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,296
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    474
    Kudos:
    2,877
    Bookmarks:
    712
    Hits:
    18,164

    30 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary


    “If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?” Quickly, Ilya adds, “Don’t say that you want to know if you win the Cup.”

    “Why not? What if that’s my answer?”

    “Is so boring, Hollander. Of course you want to know this. But Ilya Rozanov and Boston Raiders exist in this world, so crystal ball says, so sad, but no.”

    “Fuck off. What are these questions even for, anyway? Are you interviewing me for something? Wouldn’t you have to, like, tell me if you were?”

    Ilya is quick to assure Hollander before his paranoia takes him right out of this phone call. “It is not for interview, Hollander. I am just wondering. Answer the question.”

    “And I can’t say that I would want to know whether I win the Cup.”

    “Yes, other than that.”

    “I guess… I guess I would want to know, like, am I happy?”

     


     
    Ilya reads an article about 36 questions that are supposed to make people fall in love. He decides to ask them to Shane.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,500
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    738
    Kudos:
    6,901
    Bookmarks:
    1,559
    Hits:
    39,253

    27 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane is traded to Boston during the hookup era, and his attempts to act normal and professional around Rozanov are a little too successful: fans start shipping him with Marleau, instead.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,727
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,047
    Kudos:
    15,829
    Bookmarks:
    4,746
    Hits:
    135,663

    24 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov makes one joke too many about Shane's weak backhand. Shane doesn't take it lying down. He just doesn't tell anyone about it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,010
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    53
    Kudos:
    1,206
    Bookmarks:
    208
    Hits:
    6,755

    22 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    There really was no way he would have been able to break up with Shane tonight. He is a weak, weak man. He is a weak man who needs to get the fuck out of here before he goes back on Twitter and causes problems, or before he does something else insane like sniffing through Shane’s underwear drawer or running a reverent hand across his yoga mat. All around him is Shane Shane Shane and Shane is not here. Shane is at Montreal General Hospital in unknown condition, possibly alone.

    Ilya is putting his shoes on before he fully realizes that he’s decided to go to the hospital.

     

    Shane Hollander is carted off the ice after getting hit by Cliff Marlow. An exhausted and still-grieving Ilya Rozanov spirals, makes some stupid choices, and accidentally finds himself hanging out with his situationship’s parents.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    41,054
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    620
    Kudos:
    3,637
    Bookmarks:
    1,038
    Hits:
    36,104

    21 Jul 2026