anon_carrots
Fandoms
Recent works
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give me a call if you ever get desperate by fonduebroski314 (anon_carrots)
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)
17 Jul 2026
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Summary
When Shane goes traveling with his team for a few weeks, Ilya decides he’s in charge of Shane’s orgasms (or lack thereof).
Shane… is more into it than he’d like to admit.
Series
- Part 9 of we’ve got bad things to do
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Summary
A failed novelist from our world with no knowledge of Naruto reincarnates into the body of a Kyuubi orphan. Thrust into a terrifying and unfamiliar world, Atsuko is content to languish in mediocrity as a career genin.
Bored, she spends her spare time rewriting stories from her old world - only for a publisher to snatch them up. Atsuko becomes a best-selling author built on a throne of lies. Good thing there's no such thing as copyright law in a military dictatorship...?
In which Atsuko shamelessly rips off the Western Literary Canon, is frog-marched into Konoha’s Intelligence division to become a spy, and accidentally steals Jiraiya's thunder. Not necessarily in that order.
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Abolish private property by fonduebroski314 (anon_carrots)
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types
24 May 2026
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Summary
Haley
Hi Shane! Just messaging about our heater again. Do you think we could get it fixed today?
Shane
So sorry for the late reply, Haley! I’m at the Olympics and my time zones are all messed up. Messaged my HVAC guy and he’ll be there in the morning.Haley
screenshot.jpg
Wtf?
Katie
Is this guy fr???Or: the trials and tribulations of renting from Shane Hollander.
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Summary
Ilya finally meets Shane's parents. There is no way this could go wrong.
Series
- Part 5 of we’ve got bad things to do
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Summary
“Ilya’s been looking forward to today, the only full day they could find together this month. Of course, that’s when one of Ilya’s clients decides he needs to close a deal. He genuinely considers hiring an assassin—pulls the number up on his phone and everything—before Shane talks him out of it.
‘Why don’t I come spend time at the office with you?’”
(Or: Shane warms Ilya's cock. That's it, that's the fic.)
Series
- Part 8 of we’ve got bad things to do
Recent series
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Summary
onging hollanov mafia!au
- Words:
- 45,266
- Works:
- 9
- Bookmarks:
- 371
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peace was never an option by anon_carrots
Fandom Naruto (Anime & Manga), 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia (Anime & Manga)
03 Apr 2026
Summary
Main story: violence may not be the answer, but it's certainly less work
Extras: hidan and izuku vs the world(s)- Words:
- 65,313
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 63
Recent bookmarks
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- Words:
- 619,654
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 392
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(in another life) No Telling Who I Would Have Been by SaintOfLostCauses
Fandoms: Alex Rider - Anthony Horowitz, James Bond (Craig Movies)
13 Apr 2019
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Summary
Alex Rider dies with nary a whisper of a prayer or eulogy to his name, and three weeks later Q gains a young, dark haired assistant with no name at all, whom he simply refers to as R.
And life moves on. Save for all but Alex Rider, of course, who is irrevocably and utterly dead.
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Summary
"Welcome to a new user experience! You have triggered this interface with the keywords, ‘Stupid game! Stupid devs! I want my f*****g money back!’ You are now bound to the character Tartaglia, the Eleventh Harbinger of the Fatui, codename: Childe! We hope you have an enjoyable user experience and we welcome you once again to Genshin Impact 2.0!”
Those are some of the first words Ajax, starving college student extraordinaire, has the misfortune of hearing upon waking up in a brave new world from what he's fairly sure is a very fatal accident involving water and a shit ton of electricity.
Okay, so he's not dead. That's good. But what's this about him being stuck playing the character Tartaglia? Tartaglia, as in the no-good, one-dimensional, cartoonish villain who met his untimely, gruesome death in the first act of the original game?
Forget this. Like hell Ajax is going to share that fate.
And so begins one man's journey to save himself from his awful destiny.
Series
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Summary
Haruno Sakura. Her. A paranoid, pessimistic, 'I don't wanna die' oriented young woman that knows exactly where she stands in a world where Naruto and Sasuke exist. Not at the top.
This is our hero, people. She's the token teammate. And, you know what? That's fine. They don't get put into the bingo books. They get to go home to their families at the end of the day. This is fine.
No matter how hard her hot, blonde friend tries to convince her otherwise.
Series
- Part 1 of Bench Warmer
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something you can build by some1_around
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid
21 Jan 2026
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Summary
Six months ago, Shane’s intimate conversation and break-up with Rose Landry was recorded and leaked. In those six months, his life had completely upended and everything had changed, for better or for worse. Except for Ilya. He still has Ilya, and he’s beginning to understand that he always will.
It’s 2018. Shane Hollander has to figure out his new life, in a new city, on a new team, while being out to the world but not by his own choice. Ilya, along for the ride, also has to learn what it means to be connected to a place, to a person, and to his own inner truth.
(Sequel to “something you can fix,” set post-Heated Rivalry, pre-The Long Game)
Series
- Part 2 of something you can fix