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If I Can’t Have Him, I’m Dying Slow; If I Can’t Hold Him, I’m Dying Cold by gryff_grace
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
03 Jul 2026
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Summary
He’s at Dodger Stadium, flat on the ground, looking up at his assailant. Hard concrete and nacho chips dig into his back. Blood pools in his mouth. He wonders if he could roll himself under the seats - similar to how Buck rolled himself underneath a firetruck all those years ago to save him, except Eddie can only save himself now -
At least the kids are safe.
She promised.
“Where is she?!” the guy screams, pointing the gun at Eddie.
Fucking Taylor Kelly is going to be the death of him.
*
Or - Eddie takes Chris and Theo to a Dodgers game. He doesn’t know what’s worse. The fact that he’s seated in the same section as Buck’s ex-girlfriend and Buck’s current boyfriend, or the fact that they’re all going to have fight for their lives soon.
Series
- Part 2 of Above the Clouds
Bookmarked by Marzipan
06 Jul 2026
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Summary
Adriana doesn’t tell their parents that she’s going to LA. She doesn’t tell Eddie, either—or ask, for that matter.
She does ask Chris, and he thinks it’s a good idea—says as much, on the phone, and doesn’t say much else.
“Buck will probably be hovering,” is what Chris does volunteer.
It still surprises her when the man who opens the door is not Eddie. It’s—Captain America, is the thing that actually comes to mind—a man close to a foot taller than she is, if not more than that, with blond curls and broad shoulders, and he’s got a question in his very blue eyes that’s probably less friendly than the one he actually asks her.
“Uh,” he says. “Can I help you?”
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Or: Adriana arrives in LA. Maddie has been here the whole time.
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Bookmarked by Marzipan
05 Jul 2026
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Summary
Eddie reckons with the forces that have kept him stuck in the past on a holiday visit to his hometown. He has a choice to make, but not the one he believes he's facing down when he gets on the plane just before Thanksgiving.
Meanwhile, Buck can see the writing on the wall. This is how he loses his best friend. The same way he's already lost Christopher to the miles of distance between California and Texas. He's trapped in a cycle of loss and not sure how he's going to cope.
-⚔️-
In which I make El Paso matter, Eddie and Chris repair their relationship, and Buck goes through a period of self-discovery. Could all of their introspection lead Buck and Eddie to come crashing back together in a new way?
Bookmarked by Marzipan
04 Jul 2026
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Summary
Buck was riding the high of his first successful solo debut, still nursing the ache of someone who walked away, when he got news that blindsided him—his upcoming solo tour wouldn’t be so solo after all. He’d be sharing the stage with Eddie Diaz, a rising country star with a mysterious past and a sound that was quickly blowing up.
At first, Buck hated the idea. The last thing he wanted was to split the spotlight he’d fought so hard for.
But then he actually got to know Eddie.
The problem? Buck had always blurred the line between friendship and something more—and with Eddie, it was getting harder to tell the difference.
or the pop star evan buckley and country singer eddie diaz slow burn angsty friends to lovers au.
Bookmarked by Marzipan
29 Jun 2026
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stay through the night, I'd spend the mornings by your side by Elgney
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
26 Dec 2025
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Summary
Eddie tried to figure out how to explain. “My, uh, apartment walls are pretty thin.”
“Mhm,” she said.
“So, I can, you know. Hear things. Coming from the other side of the wall. Which, like, I guess is his bedroom.” Eddie’s face was on fire. “So, the second time it happened, I thought, I’ll just wait until he opens the door so I can introduce myself and ask him to keep it down.”
“But then you saw him,” she finished.
“But then I saw him.”
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Eddie just moved to LA with Chris for a fresh start. What he gets instead is an earful of his neighbor’s sex life, several pairs of earplugs, and just maybe, the love of his life.
Bookmarked by Marzipan
06 Jun 2026

