Eapeets



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    There really was no way he would have been able to break up with Shane tonight. He is a weak, weak man. He is a weak man who needs to get the fuck out of here before he goes back on Twitter and causes problems, or before he does something else insane like sniffing through Shane’s underwear drawer or running a reverent hand across his yoga mat. All around him is Shane Shane Shane and Shane is not here. Shane is at Montreal General Hospital in unknown condition, possibly alone.

    Ilya is putting his shoes on before he fully realizes that he’s decided to go to the hospital.

     

    Shane Hollander is carted off the ice after getting hit by Cliff Marlow. An exhausted and still-grieving Ilya Rozanov spirals, makes some stupid choices, and accidentally finds himself hanging out with his situationship’s parents.

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    22 Jul 2026

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    “Do you want to join New York?”

    Shane closes his eyes, taking in a deep breath before trying his best to look Ilya in the eyes. Failing, as he shifts them back downwards, “I– I don't know. It's beneficial, sure but it's just so far away from you, Ilya. I don't think I could take putting you through all that,”

    “Shane. Do you want to join New York?”

    A beat passes them. “Yes,” he breathlessly says.

    It's not Ottawa. It's fucking New York. And with Scott Hunter at the helm, Ilya is sure he pulled some strings just to spite him. Turns out, this old dog does have new tricks.

    Inspired by countless headcanons that ask the question: What if Shane was traded to NYA?

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    22 Jul 2026

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    “Aww, don’t be embarrassed Haasy. Just don’t tell him about your Ilya Rozanov poster and you can definitely pull this swimmer boy!” Ilya said.

    The only thing more mortifying than getting caught watching borderline thirst traps of your crush is having your hockey idol (and childhood crush) talking about your dating life.

    Luca closed his eyes, his blush no doubt crawling up further from his neck all the way to his forehead.

    “Who’s Haasy gonna pull?” Harris asked, walking into the barbeque with a crate of cider and Troy by his side.

    “Oh, kill me now”

    -----

    Or during a summer trip to Colorado Springs Luca meets Matthew Vasquez, American Olympic swimming prodigy, energetic extrovert, and a sucker for those beautiful blue eyes.

    What ensues is a beautifully chaotic montage of text flirting, sunscreen thirst traps, jumbo tron sightings, hickies, and sweet morning afters. Prepare yourself for truckloads of fluff and angst and yearning as the youngest and most beloved member of the Centaurs learns how scary and freeing and uniquely intimate it is to give your heart over to someone else.

    Or Luca Haas falls in love

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    22 Jul 2026

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    Luca Haas has never wanted anyone. Sebastian Rambeau has wanted Luca since he was seventeen. An All-Star Weekend drinking game cracks Luca open in front of a dozen players, and the loudest mouth in the league follows him onto a dark balcony and turns out to be someone else entirely. Twelve days later, Ottawa plays New York. They collide on the boards and kiss in a hallway and learn that wanting someone you compete against is its own kind of sport.

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    22 Jul 2026

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    Shane watches Ilya shove a hand through his hair, waits for him to meet his eyes. “You pretend to want things, pretend I can have things that we both know you won’t let me have,” he says, his newfound self-esteem carrying him past the point of no return. He wishes he’d never discovered it, because it’s making Ilya’s face do something awful.

    “Oh, you mean I hurt your feelings?”

    Close enough, Shane supposes, his chest aching again. He goes to lift his hand again, sees Ilya zero in on the movement, doesn’t. “I guess so.”

    Ilya scoffs, mean and sharp. “So sorry, Hollander, I didn’t mean to make you get so emotional about a casual fuck.”
    Asshole. So many times he has lobbed the word at Ilya in exasperation, reluctant affection and disbelief, but now he thinks it with vitriolic anger. “I think you should go.”

    Shane finally decides that Ilya's ability to weaponise sex isn't enough for him anymore. Ilya doesn't take it well, but Shane holds firm. Then they start to text about it. Sort of.

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    20 Jul 2026