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This was incredibly stupid. He didn’t know what he was doing here. He was standing in the badly disguised gymnasium of Galway High in a suit burrowed from his Father that barely fit him (his father had a gut.) But here he was, standing next to Kian Stone who was wearing a red sparkling dress and obnoxiously pointy heels.
Kian was laughing about something with Becky, who was wearing a suit a few sizes too big that somehow worked, they where laughing and touching hands, they where always touching, even if it was the gentle brush of the knee or a reassuring shoulder squeeze, they where joined at the hip, always had after they had started dating. Rand sighed and looked away, wishing there was booze here, even though there wasn’t, and would unlikely be any as the night progressed. He cast his gaze over to the dancefloor where he saw Rolan awkwardly dancing with a girl, what her name was, Rand didn’t really care to ask nor remember. But something in his gut twisted as he watched, even if what Rolan and the girl were doing was less of a dance and more of an awkward shuffle.
Rand watched Rolan’s posture, his tense shoulders and furrowed brows, ah, he was trying to not mess up, that thought made Rand lips twist upwards slightly. He kept watching until the music changed into something more lively and Rolan freed himself, making his way over to Rand. Rolan Deep was tall and skinny, puberty hadn’t been kind to him and made him shoot up like a beanstalk, leaving his limbs gangly. This meant that the suit he had gotten was too small for him, causing him to awkwardly tug at the sleeves.
They stood at the edge of the dance floor, watching Kian and Becky lay waste to their peers as Kian flung Becky around laughing loudly. Rolan cleared his throat, a trait he had gotten off his Father when he was trying to start a conversation and didn’t know how. “So” He starts, watching carefully as Rand turns to look at him, eyebrow raised. “So” Rand answers, now looking at Rolan’s face as he fidgeted with his lower lip, another nervous tick.
They stay staring at each other for a moment, watching how they react to each other, before Rolan clears his throat again. “Did you bring anyone with you?” Rand eyes Rolan, watching him fidget. “No, you?” Rolan swallows, its a whole thing, a gentle bob of his adam apple and a tilt of his chin. “Yeah, Sarah, she’s..” He looks around for a second, seeing her dancing with her friends “over there” Rand follows his eyes at the girl in the crowd, she’s nothing special, wearing a light yellow dress that clashes horribly with her hair, Rand shows how he feels with a quick scrunch of his nose and an exhale. “Right.” They stand there again, two prepubescent boys about to finish school.
“I need a smoke” Rand declares, knowing that whether Rolan liked it or not, he was coming with him. So they exited the gym, earning a suspicious look from Mr Dickman as they went. It was nice to be out of the hot stuffiness of teenage hormones and bodily oder, even if they where trading it for the slight chill that came with the Lousianna winter. Rolan shivered slightly, he had never dealt well with the cold. But he watched Rand put the cigarette to his mouth, seeing how he had made the end slightly moist from his parted lips as he lit it with his shoddy lighter he had gotten from the gas station. Rolan watched as he took a hit and exhaled through his nose, the smoke drifting away from him on the breeze, in his too big suit that made him look like a child trying to be a man. Rand had kept his boyish complexion, acne scars on his cheeks and the slight stubborn stubble that clung to his jaw. “This was a waste of time” Rand says, cigarette perched between his pointer and thumb, Rolan was tempted to agree but he didn’t, instead he pulled at his suit, attempting to get the warmth that lined his suit jacket. “Do you even know how to dance?” Rolan said instead, trying to hide his hands in his jacket and failing, Rand rounded on him, cigarette dangling from his mouth “Yes, obviously I know how to dance” Rolan raised an eyebrow, using his height to look down on him slightly. “Sure.” He watched Rand take another drag of his cigarette, eyebrows knitted together and nose slightly wrinkled. His nose was slightly bent from when Rolan had broken it, he had a matching droop from when Rand had broken his in return.
“Prove it” “What” Rand looked back at Rolan, drinking in his expression, the confusion and obvious judgement. “Fine, but you’re being the woman” Rolan says, as if he was breathing, pulling Rand in easily. Rand didn’t complain, even when the height difference was humbling, even when he disregarded his cigarette to instead rest in his hands on Rolan’s boney shoulders. They moved slowly, soaking in each other’s presence as the fog danced with them. You could see the dull lamp posts reflecting in Rolan’s eyes as he tilted his head ever so slightly towards Rand’s. Rand mimicked the gesture, allowing Rolan to enter his space, to be able to see the subtle flaring of his nostrils as he breathed.
They were too close, chests brushing through their uncomfortable suits. This was wrong. They should pull away, do something.
Neither moved, they hung close, swaying in the breeze.
Until Rolan regained his senses and pulled away, straightening up and fidgeting with his sleeves, he stared at Rand, eyebrows furrowed and a look of regret written in his eyes as he turned away and walked back into the gymnasium.
Leaving Rand, but this wouldn’t be the last time he left him.