Work Text:
Barry Allen was an extremely angry person.
It was something Mick couldn't help but realise when he looked at the younger man. Sure he was happy, but he wasn't as light as he used to be, as care free as he was when Leonard and Mick first met him.
Mick recognised it instantly because it was something he saw in Lenny. Sure Leonard didn't act like a small bundle of joy like the kid did, but much like Barry, Leonard had an underlying anger in everything he did.
No one else on the ship could see it, they saw The Flash – the hope of Central City. Lenny could see the kid was pissed but he didn't see the anger he and the kid both had etched into their skin.
Allen was currently sitting on the counter in the kitchen, people walking around him cooking. He was grinning and eating one of those calorie bars Mick had heard him complaining about, that was in-between being given small testers of whatever everyone was cooking.
Len was leaning against the counter facing Barry, watching him carefully and Mick nearly rolled his eyes.
He walked into the kitchen finally and Barry looked up and grinned at him, Mick just grunted in response.
"Honestly though, you guys should've seen Earth-2" The kid continued, Mick didn't want to know, "It was so cool and we all met our doppelgangers. Mine was some reporter and my sister Iris was police Captain"
"I'd have thought your dad would be Captain on Earth-2, considering how much work he's put into the CCPD over here?" Kendra asked.
It was an innocent question but immediately Barry's face soured.
"Joe … he was a singer, a pretty good one actually. But uh, he … I -" Anger flashed in his eyes and Mick knew something must've happened for the kid to be angry with himself. But just as others started to notice he grinned again. "You would've liked it Len, while we were there, there was a notice that Mayor Snart made to his people."
"Could've been my sister" Len drawled but Mick could still see the interest in his eyes.
"Still, don't pretend like that wouldn't make you happy"
Len just smirked, "Sure kid"
"Just think after all this is up, you could go back and do as much good as he did"
"Oh yeah I'm sure the do-gooders of Central City are just dying to elect me as the next mayor."
Barry just smiled, "You never know, stranger things have happened. After all you are on a team of people with different abilities, flying through time and space to stop bad guys."
"See Leonard. Thank you Barry I'm always trying to tell him he doesn't need to act all bad, especially after all the good he's done with us" Kendra half sighed.
"Did he tell you about that time he got himself blown up to save us?" Ray asked and immediately Barry's head snapped in Snart's direction.
"What?"
"It was nothing kid forget about it." Len stood up to leave but Barry flashed in front of him, blocking the exit.
"No, tell me what happened"
He looked at Len for a moment but after realising he wasn't going to answer, he looked around the rest of the kitchen. Suddenly no one would meet his eyes.
Mick huffed, "He died to blow up the Oculus. But don't worry we got 'im back"
"You died, why on earth would you do that?"
"No other choice kid"
"There's always another choice Leonard!" Barry's eyes flashed with something, probably his lightning, "It never has to be your life or someone else's. Don't put your life on the line again"
"It doesn't matter"
"It … Do you have any idea about how many people have been … and you just …" Barry took a sharp intake of breath.
"That's not how I meant it Scarlet" Len tried to reason but Barry had already flashed out of the room before he'd even heard Len's reply.
Len looked startled and powered out of the room, Mick followed behind him.
"Lenny just leave him be" Mick said, catching up with Len.
"I … I don't even know what I'm doing, I don't know why I'm so worked up over upsetting that damned kid."
"I think you do know Lenny, deep down" Mick stepped into Len's space, wrapping his arms around his lover.
Len looked away, down the empty hall, "It … I'm sorry Mick. He'll never mean as much to me as you do though, you know that right?"
Mick nearly snorted but held it back, "I think we can say at this point Len, that the kid means more to both of us than either of us would care to admit"
Len's eyes widened, "Really?"
"Don’t be so surprised Len. He's as broken as us two and yet he's constantly trying to do good, got to like a little flame like that"
Len looked up with him with such adoration that it started to make Len uncomfortable, "Besides, Kendra told me that Flash's friend Cisco told her he could vibrate"
"...Vibrate"
Mick grinned.
It was 2.56am when Len woke up with a start, something was wrong.
A scream ripped through the ship and immediately Len was running out of the room, he could hear Mick rolling out behind him but he didn't wait up.
The rooms were soundproofed so that noise couldn't escape, but so that they could hear noises from the outside in case of a problem in the ship.
Everyone was leaning out of their doors, rubbing their eyes. Sara was the only one who looked alert.
"What's going on is everyone okay?" Rip asked, "This is everyone I don’t under-"
There was another scream and Len realised.
"Barry"
Barry hadn't fell asleep in a room that night, instead falling asleep in Rip's pilot seat. Hunter hadn't been impressed but the entire team had threatened his life if he dared wake up the sleeping speedster.
Len ran into the room and saw Barry still asleep in the chair, which was a mild relief, at least he was in no physical danger.
Barry was thrashing around in the seat, sweat running down his forehead.
"Barry?"
The kid started to mutter and whimper and Len shook his arm again.
"N-no please" Barry cried, "PLEASE NO I-"
"BARRY!" Len yelled again and Barry shot up and ran forward, to the glass at the front of the ship.
He sat curled up on the floor, shaking.
"Len?"
Len turned around to see Mick at the door, he raised an eyebrow when he saw the man standing alone.
"Sara made them all wait back" Mick answered his unasked question and Len nodded.
Mick made his way across the room and stood next to Len.
Barry hadn't stopped shaking and had his head buried in his arms.
"Scarlet?" Len asked softly, knowing what it was like to get like this, having had it happen to him more times than he could count when he was younger.
"I c-can't, s-so many people have d-d-d-" He burst into tears and both of the older men startled a little bit.
"People die Barry, it's not your fault" Mick whispered, "Some things are just out of our control."
"B-but it's my job, my r-responsibility"
The two watched him for a moment before Mick bent down and picked the kid up.
Barry didn't even react, he simply buried his head into Mick's shoulder, trying to stifle his sobs.
He carried Barry all the way back to his room, Len following behind him.
They passed the rest of the crew and Len just nodded at them before they all went back into their rooms.
Mick placed Barry onto the middle of the bed and started to walk away but Barry's hand shot out.
"C-can … Can you two stay with me"
Len tried not to act surprised but it must've shown on his face.
"I mean you don't have to I just …" He trailed off and Len looked down at the speedster. He saw the drying tears on his face, he saw how broken Barry was, how he was pretending to be okay. Len knew he wasn't as happy as he pretended but he didn't think it was that bad until tonight.
Until tonight he didn't feel like he had to protect Barry, but after that Len knew that there was nothing he wouldn't do for the kid.
Len looked to Mick, a bit hesitant at first. He knew Mick said that this - whatever this was – was fine but he couldn't upset Mick, not after all this time together.
Mick nodded at him and that was all the encouragement Len needed.
Both men crawled onto the bed, either side of Barry.
For a moment he was still but as Mick wrapped an arm around him, Barry also placed his arm around Len.
For a moment Len froze but then he relaxed against the man and he felt Barry smile slightly against him.
"It's not your fault Barry" Mick repeated.
Barry sighed, "I just, I can't let go of them, any of them. All the people that have died because of me, I know all of their names, can see all of their faces as I shut my eyes at night. No matter how hard I try it's never good enough"
"Good enough? You never have to hold yourself to a standard Scarlet. Whatever you manage to do is good enough, you save one in ten people and that is good enough you need to understand that." Len rubbed his thumb on Barry's back, glad that the man wasn't tensing despite their conversation.
It was weird how the three of them had seemed to create a safe haven between them just by being with each other.
"You need to let some of that anger go kid, need to stop being angry at yourself, angry at the world for dealing shitty hands to people when they shouldn't have. Promise?"
Len stopped breathing for a moment, knew somehow that Mick was also talking to him.
"Promise" Barry said, pulling Len closer.
Len glanced up at Mick and nodded his head.
Mick just smiled.