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Riva swam around the beautiful blue waters of Aguatunisia. It was good to be home, good to be where the waves were gentle and the sun filtered through the water like dappled gold. Good to be back with the shoal, to luxuriate in having their family with them.
Still, they felt a little apart from everyone else. They had learned so much and changed so much on their Gallivant, and they wondered if that hadn't ruined them. It was impossible for them to fully integrate back into Aguatunisian society the way they had fit before they left. Too much had changed.
Their voice stood out a bit, now. And sometimes people looked at them askance, whenever Riva would talk about fair pay, or unions, or even magnets. What use did they have for these things? They were all happy, on Aguatunisia. An ideal society. How would they even use magnets anyway?
Riva missed their magnets.
Still, it was (mostly) delightful to be home. And whenever the shoal got together and celebrated and shared happiness, it was like a warm ember in their chest.
Today it was a wedding. How exciting! Aguatunisian weddings were rare, mostly because of the timing and logistics and even luck involved. Imagine finding four other people you love who love you and also love each other! Riva thought back to the wedding they had overseen on the Wurst. Imagine finding even one person you love who loved you back!
Riva couldn't imagine.
Riva was different, and stood out, and felt apart, and not just because of how their Gallivant had changed them. No, Riva had stood out before going on Gallivant.
Because Riva didn't love.
Well, that was a blatantly untrue and horrible way of framing things. Of course Riva loved. They loved their family, here on Aguatunisia. They loved their friends. They loved their crew on the Wurst, who were in many ways also a family. Riva loved travelling, and magnets. Riva loved doing big things and helping people.
To say that Riva didn't love was a downright false and mean thing to say.
But they were pretty sure they heard bubbling thoughts all the same. No one said anything to them. Riva wasn't even sure people were aware that they were thinking it.
But here, at this wedding, Riva was aware that they were different.
And that was not bad. Aguatunisian romance tended to play out along the same lines, various courtships and desires coming together to allow these five beautiful people to join their lives together. It wasn't super frequent that everything lined up in such a way, but it was definitely common.
Riva was uncommon. Riva loved, but not like that.
There had been a multitude of loves and ways to love and expressions of love on the Wurst. Riva had enjoyed watching it all play out. So many different stories! The toxic but compelling situationship between Margaret and Lucienne (and situationship was such a fun word! nothing like that existed on Aguatunisia). Sidney and Barry, who had such a cute dynamic, so supportive of each other. Plug and Bambi. Whatever was going on with Skip and Skipper. Even Gunnie’s silly and failed attempts to do pleasure. Riva had delighted in the multitude of ways their crew had experienced love.
And they had fit right in, rather than stood out. Everyone laughed at Riva’s attempts to sell pleasure putty, but none of the crew judged them for never wanting to use it themself. No one tried to matchmake, or ask nagging questions (and it's not even like their family on Aguatunisia nagged! but they knew it bothered their family, a little, that they had no interest in marriage and children). No, the Wurst crew just enveloped Riva in their different ways of expressing love.
Riva didn't want romance. Riva didn't want sex. But that didn't mean Riva didn't want love.
And they found that love with the Wurst. Acceptance of who they were, fully, knowing what they have done, never putting pressure or questions on them. The Wurst just loved them. Period. Full stop.
(Well, maybe not Skipper. But that one was a work in progress.)
And Riva was happy to be home, they truly were. They were so thrilled for the happy fivesome, so excited that there was a new family in the making. So happy to delight in Aguatunisian celebrations, to feel home again.
But Riva knew the Wurst was home, too. It's like they said in 200 Fast 200 Furious: family.
Riva loved their family. And their family loved them. And that love was beautiful and fulfilling and so so important.
They'd go back, eventually. They missed their magnets, after all.
And it would be nice to be back with the people they love.