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Yuletide Madness 2025
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Published:
2025-12-15
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526
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1/1
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Not An Exact Science

Summary:

Five worlds where the snake fight thesis became a tradition.

Notes:

I saw your list of 100 books and was like...what amazing taste. All of these people should have to deal with the snake fights in their own special way.

Work Text:

Gödel, Escher, Bach (Douglas Hofstadter)

Tortoise: This is the SERPENT, which stands for SERPENT Eternally Recurses, Perenially Eating Nested Tail.

SERPENT: Actually, my name is Ouroboros.

Achilles: More like ouro-bore us, am I right?

Tortoise: How can you talk with your tail in your mouth?

Achilles: If we got two, they could eat each other’s tails. A SERPENT referencing a SNAKE, which in turn eats the SERPENT. That would be more impressive.

Tortoise: True, but I don’t know any catchy words that start with K.

SERPENT: LLMs may be able to produce a coherent thesis, but they’ll never defeat me.

Achilles: That’s what you think.


Kairos series (Madeleine L'Engle)

“I think I’m going to take the terminal master’s,” Meg admitted. “I can’t see myself doing this for several more years to write a paper no one will read. There are more important things.”

Calvin said nothing at first. He was aware of the optics; both of them were conscientious about sharing the work of parenting. “It’s your choice,” he finally repeated. “Whatever you decide, we’ll make it work.”

Meg glanced at him like she knew what he’d been thinking. “Besides, I don’t think I could face Louise the Larger if I killed one of her cousins. Even by accident.”


Oxford Time Travel Universe (Connie Willis)

John typed a fragment, deleted it, hesitated. Words couldn’t do justice to what he’d lived through, but he had to try. It would be embarrassing to survive the Blitz just to fail now.

“Did you fight a snake?” he asked.

Kivrin, across the room, didn’t look up. “Yeah. It was a formality.”

“A formality?”

“People in the 1300s couldn’t be fazed by wild animals. I got used to it.”

“I thought they’d be vilified as a source of sin. Or whatever.”

Kivrin shrugged. “Even in Isaiah’s vision, there are asps and adders. They’re just safe to play with, that’s all.”


Vorkosigan Saga (Lois McMaster Bujold)

The regent’s kid, Vorkosigan, didn’t have any bracelets yet. Kostolitz bristled. He’d probably aced all his written tests, just like he’d implied back in their entrance exams. At least his creepy bodyguard wasn’t following him around to help anymore.

“.2 g,” Vorkosigan murmured.

“What?”

“Simulated gravity. We probably won’t get constrictors, they get gravity-sick too. Something venomous, I’d guess. Have you checked the first aid kit?”

He’d given it a cursory once-over, but…“Why are you helping me?”

“Why shouldn’t I?” He shrugged. “In the real world, we won’t have a choice.”

Well, Kostolitz figured, there were worse things than know-it-alls.


Steerswoman series (Rosemary Kirstein)

Gwen said Mira had been bit by a snake, and that was why she was crazy in the head. But Rowan didn’t look crazy. She wore a ring that twisted around, like a snake biting its own tail, continuing forever.

“It’s a tradition,” she explained. “So we don’t get so lost in scholarship that we forget the world under our feet.”

Steffie didn’t know much about books and maps and the like. But snakes? Even if Gwen was yelling at him to kill one, he could scoop it outside where it would be safe. He could handle snakes just fine.