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It had been about an hour since Gangle had left her alone in the dark Spudsy’s. She’d swept up the front, restocked the cups and lids, and cleaned the soda machine. She’d taken the cash to the office and counted it out, before dropping the cash bag in a mysterious box labeled ‘Drop Off’, and then she’d gone around the building and turned off all the machinery and lights before stepping out into the dark evening.
The Spudsy’s was located in the middle of quiet suburbia. Above her an impossible sky spanned across, beautiful stars and galaxies littered across it as if no light pollution had ever existed in the world. And she could see them clearly even though the road and parking lot had a few giant light poles. She locked the door and pocketed the keys, giving the door one final tug. Part of her didn’t want to leave at all, honestly. This place was so easy and normal. So much more relaxed than the other adventures Caine forced her to participate in. So much closer to real life. She actually kind of felt comfortable here. Relaxed. They’d all felt it, she thought, on some level.
Some more than others. Jax had been kind of okay today. Not to everyone, of course, but to her. Specifically to her. She was absolutely not wondering what that was about, or whether or not it meant anything substantial, when she turned back to the road and noticed him.
Jax was leaning against a car, arms crossed, head tilted back so his ears dipped even further. His eyes were closed, but he was facing the sky, one leg crossed. She wasn’t sure what he was still doing here. He’d gotten off first. He should be long, long gone by now. It wasn’t like their out times had been even close on the schedule, but Pomni had offered to stay behind, even. So she was leaving even later than she’d originally planned. But when he heard her step off the curb and onto the asphalt of the parking lot, scanning the area for her own car, his ears perked up.
His eyes opened and he looked over at her, usual smile missing as he appraised her.
”Gangle said you closed for her,” He said.
”Uh, yeah,” She said, feeling a little scolded and feeling pretty annoyed about it. “I didn’t think anyone was waiting for me.”
”I wasn’t waiting for you,” He said.
”Okay…” She said, trying to be a little more patient than usual. He’d been nice to her today, so he kind of deserved a teeny tiny bit of leeway. Maybe. “What do you want, then?”
”I got caught up,” He said, offering no explanation as to what he got ‘caught up’ with, “And noticed you don’t have a car. Want a lift home?”
”You waited….to give me a ride home?” Pomni said, stunned. She stopped walking, and Jax stuffed his hands in his pockets, trying to look cool. He didn’t respond. Okay, so then he absolutely did wait a few hours in the dark parking lot for her to come out so he could offer her a ride home. To a fake home, in a simulation.
That was kind of cute.
”Um, yeah, okay. Thanks.”
Jax kicked off his car and pulled the passenger door open, not looking at her as she made her way across the parking lot to climb in. The car itself was clean, well taken care of, but clearly very, very old. When he started it up it made a squealing sound and he sighed, but it started up and soon they were off. The radio played softly, some wordless tune that sounded suspiciously like the background track to a Green Day song. For a moment her brain asked how long he’d been in the Circus, and then the rational part of her shut that down before it could take root and cause problems for her.
”Do you know…why does the sky look like that?” She asked, after several minutes had passed with no conversation.
”Like what?”
”So pretty. We shouldn’t be able to see the stars like that, because this is clearly some kind of suburban neighborhood. A few, sure, but not the entire milky way.”
Jax glanced at the stars through the windshield, before shrugging. “I don’t think Caine knows about light pollution. I don’t think it means anything.”
”Do you think that it might be because…he’s having sex with the moon?” She said the last bit slyly, slowly, watching his face through the side of her eye as her words sunk in.
He bit his lip, trying to keep back a laugh, but it slipped through with a ‘pfft’ and then he laughed out loud before looking at her. Pleased, she fought the blush on her cheeks, but gave up when she realized it was dark enough that he probably wouldn’t be able to see the effect he had on her.
“So we just need to make you do physical labor and you get funny, huh?” He asked, grinning.
“I’m not sure that counts as physical labor. I think that usually means like building houses or something. Um, where are we going?”
Jax turned back to the road, wide smile still on his face as he sang, “You’ll see.”
Pomni’s stomach sank and she frowned. Okay, so not that much nicer. A surprise from Jax wasn’t going to be any fun at all, she was pretty sure. Probably something kind of mean, but not too mean, she hoped. It was kind of on her for getting in the car with him at all. The whole thing had been sus, anyway, right? Like why didn’t she have a car? Why would he wait for her? Why hadn’t she figured out earlier that there was no way for him to know which way her fake apartment was?
”Don’t look so bummed out,” Jax said, and when she looked at him his smile almost looked strained, “It’s fine. What do you think I’m going to do?”
”Take me into the woods and shoot me?” Pomni offered trying to be light and teasing. Although, really, this turning into The Most Dangerous Game would be stupidly fitting. “Or maybe you know there’s some horrible haunted house out here and you’re going to trick me inside again.”
”First of all,” Jax said, clearly annoyed, ears drooping and face a scowl, “It wasn’t my fault you ended up in the scary part of that adventure. Do you really think I wanted to be left alone with Ragatha? Not a chance. No, that was entirely on Kinger.”
”You threw her mask, like a jerk.”
”I threw her mask because it was funny,” Jax said, body relaxing again. “Kinger always has to get involved and ruin it.”
”I don’t think that’s very fair. He was really kind of…sweet,” Pomni said, and then said, “It’s okay. I forgive you.”
Jax shot her a look, but took a breath and held it, letting it out in a small puff of air. He turned the car down a side road, driving them through a housing tract and out into the rolling hills behind it. Pomni glanced out the window but didn’t say anything, because…well, probably because she wasn’t actually sure he was going to do anything bad to her at all. Maybe he would, but she kind of felt like it wasn’t going to happen. In fact, she was pretty sure this whole little joyride was a good thing.
If Jax was going to wait outside to bully someone, he would have grabbed Gangle up the moment she got out before her. So, well…he was waiting for her. He wanted her. This wasn’t a coincidence. This was planned. And something felt really kind of heavy in the car. As if he was nervous, almost. She looked up at him, curiously, and thought through the day. He’d tried to talk to her a few times, before the end when he’d straight up walked up to her. And then he’d waited for her, obviously.
It kind of felt…and now he was driving her somewhere secluded…
Pomni sat up straight, suddenly, and he jolted from the movement, giving her another side eye. She hadn’t really had any time to feel out what her body was like, here. She wasn’t even sure they could, let alone should. And they shouldn’t. Obviously. They’d never even really spoken, not in any meaningful way, anyway— oh but, wait, he’d spoken to her before. Reached out to her before.
”Oh,” She said, with too much meaning.
”What?” Jax said, voice clipped, body tense.
”Um,” She didn’t want him to know she knew. She wanted to see where this went. It would say a lot about what kind of guy he was if she let him lead, and how he chose to do so. “I didn’t know he made this much surrounding area for each adventure.”
”Oh, yeah,” Jax said, relaxing again, the car speeding through the darkness with a confidence that she couldn’t imagine possessing. How did he know they weren’t going to crash? “He always builds it out way too big. That’s why we can go crazy on these things. You know, when you ditched us in the Candy Kingdom we went on a whole road trip.”
”Ditched you? Yeah, okay.”
”Well you did. And what’s with you and that gummy-guy anyway?”
Pomni’s eyes went wide, and her stomach flipped. He was asking about Gummigoo, which wouldn’t have really mattered that much, except that men only usually asked about other men if they were digging for information. Digging with purpose. If she had hair, she would twirl it around a finger and try to sit more daintily. Well, maybe. If she really liked him.
“Um, he’s my friend,” Pomni said, and she found she’d sat up straighter and kind of posed all on her own. Uh oh. “Why?”
”Friend? You knew him for like an hour.”
”We had a moment,” Pomni said, softly, “I don’t really want to talk about it. If that’s okay.”
Jax cast her a look, and he kept looking, his eyes widening as he looked over her Spudsy Uniform clad body. Then he turned stiffly back to the road, mouth closed, eyes wide, gripping the steering wheel as if he was going to fly away. Pomni wasn’t sure if she’d misread things, because honestly she really, really didn’t know him very well. Which meant this was pretty ill-advised. Especially because she did know one thing about Jax.
Absolutely nobody liked him.
Not even Ragatha, which really should have been the nail in his coffin. And yet she found herself finding him to be kind of interesting. Maybe if he wasn’t being a dick he might be kind of…her type? Maybe? Which felt crazy to think, because he was a rabbit, and also an asshole. But his personality felt like the type of guy she got on with at work. If he let her in, they might actually become friends. And maybe more, if the mood struck them. Which was a bad idea because they were kind of stuck here, possibly forever. Or until they abstracted. But really, how sustainable was this? Not making any meaningful relationships. Never going anywhere new that was real. Never having her own life that she got to control, ever again. How long could she live like this, if ‘this’ was even living?
”You okay?”
His voice cut through her thoughts and she blinked, “Um, sorry.”
”Don’t think about anything that long. It’ll drive you nuts.”
”Yeah, sorry. I was just thinking—“
”About your…him?” Jax asked, voice low.
”Um, not really, but I guess also kind of? It’s hard to talk about. I think I’m just still adjusting,” Pomni said, waving a hand, “That’s all.”
“Yeah, I get it.”
”I thought you might,” Pomni said, then tried to ease the tension with a playful, “Something told me you’d been through something similar.”
Jax smiled and scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Yeah, we’re all in it together, aren’t we? Here.”
The car pulled to a stop, but there was nothing there. It was a grassy hill, the end of the grass with the beginning of the woods ringed around it. Pomni looked out into the grass, half-expecting a horrible monster to lumber up and get them. The engine cutoff, and she spun to look at him. He pulled the keys from the ignition and climbed out of the car. When he moved around it, she turned to watch, and jumped when he opened her door, too.
“Are you coming? Or do you want me to carry you, too, since you couldn’t be bothered to get out of the car on your own?”
”Where are we going?” Pomni asked as she climbed out of the car to join him in the grass. She sounded nervous even to her own ears.
Jax shut the door behind her, then handed her the keys.
“Since you can’t seem to trust me, you can hold onto these.”
The night sounded like a night should: crickets, soft breeze, the gentle distant whisper of wind in the trees. The air was perfect, too, a little damp, a little chill, but not bad enough to be cold. Jax stepped around her, and leaned against the hood of the car. With a smile aimed at her, he swung his legs up and made himself comfortable, leaning his back against the windshield. Then he looked up at the sky, hands folded on his stomach, to drive the point home.
”You’re kidding. You brought me out here to stargaze?” Pomni said, stunned.
“Well, we’re here, and there’s stars. So might as well, right?”
Pomni stared up at him. So she hadn’t been imagining it. And he was barreling right past friendship and skipping right to benefits. Well, okay. That would probably be fine. Had to be fine. What if she waited to be sure and he took the rejection to heart? Not that they were at a point yet where he was explicitly making a move. Jax looked at her, rolled his eyes, and grabbed her wrist. She opened her mouth to ask him what he was doing, but her question was preemptively answered when he tugged her, hard, so she stumbled forward. He wrapped his other arm around her waist, and she made a startled sound and flushed, both hands grabbing at him to shove him off her, but then she was in the air. Before she could do anything but let out a little cry of alarm, she found herself sitting on the hood beside him, shocked into silence.
”Glad you decided to join me,” Jax said, and fell back, so he was reclining against the windshield again.
Unamused, she had half a mind to get back down and drive off, even if he was still on the damn hood. Let him figure it out for himself. But after a moment she reclined beside him. The sky was gorgeous, really, Caine should be proud of himself. It glittered and sparkled and felt impossibly close. Probably because, she figured, it technically was. She didn’t think most video games could go very far in any one direction.
”Wow,” She sighed.
”Yeah,”Jax said. “Makes you think, huh.”
”How small we are? How insignificant?”
”How stuck.”
He clearly hadn’t meant to say it. The air was heavy between them, and he shifted just a bit, so he wasn’t as wide open and vulnerable. It was hard to be open about the thing that was affecting all of them. Really hard. Because they all knew, on some level, that it was hopeless. But no hope would lead to abstraction, too, she thought. So it was a delicate balance. Not crazy enough to yearn to be free, that way lay madness, but not completely devoid of all hope. She hadn’t quite gotten the balance down, yet, but she could see the end goal in Ragatha.
”I try not to think about it like that,” Pomni said. ”It could be worse.”
”Sure.”
”You could have had to drive Ragatha home,” She said, and he snorted, and she laughed, and then she kind of felt bad.
She hadn’t meant it how it sounded. What she really meant was that he could have had to deal with drunk Ragatha instead of getting to hang out with her. Not that Ragatha was (necessarily) bad company, she was fine usually. But Jax hated her, so for him Pomni was the obvious winner. She inched her hand over the hood of the car, slowly, until her fingers brushed his. Instinctively he yanked his hand away, startled, but when he looked down and saw it was her he looked a little nervous and unsure of himself before it relaxed away, melting into one of his usual, quiet looks. Not happy, exactly. Maybe ‘relaxed’ was a better word.
”Yeah, what was she on, anyway?” Jax asked.
”I don’t really know. But I want some, whatever it is. Can we get drunk?”
”Can we get drunk?”
”No, can we get drunk?” Pomni said.
”Yeah, I think so. We don’t always have adventures where alcohol is involved but one time, way before even Zooble got here, we did this Western thing— check it out, there was this movie way back in the 70s called West World and it was about—“
”Yeah, they made a whole show about it,” Pomni laughed, “What, you’ve only heard of the movie? That’s kind of weird, it’s usually the other way around.”
”No way. Really? How do you know? You don’t seem like the scifi type.”
”You don’t really know me well enough to judge if I’m a specific type or not,” Pomni said, still amused. “But this guy I worked with was super into it. He’d come in every time he watched a new episode and relay the whole thing to me.”
”Huh.”
“Mm, and I might have told him to leave me alone, but he did good work and I didn’t want to make enemies. Plus he usually brought me a coffee. So it was kind of like an exchange of goods. He paid me in coffee, and he got someone who would listen as he prattled on about the latest episode. Win-win.”
”He probably just wanted to take you out.”
Pomni laughed, the idea was so absurd to her, “I don’t think so.”
”Why not? You ugly or something?”
Pomni laughed again, and shoved him with her shoulder, and he smiled at her. They settled back against the glass and she stared up at the sky. After a moment she felt a finger brush against her hip, right where her belt was. Without saying anything, and without looking, she dropped her hand between them, so it grazed his. Jax didn’t pull away this time. Their fingers mingled between them, and she worked hers between his, so they were kind of laced. He let her, which was good. she wanted to be sure she was right before she did anything more obvious.
”So…what made you think of this?”
Jax shrugged, and she scooted a little closer, so her feet gently pressed against his leg. He glanced at her, expression kind of serious and apprehensive. Like he might be nervous. Nervous because of her, maybe. But as soon as the thought occurred to her, she brushed it off. Jax was never nervous, or at least, he hadn’t been until today. Though maybe his ‘torture’ at the hands of Manager Gangle had kind of put him in his place, and maybe he was more likley to be nervous now that he’d experienced some kind of consequences for his poor behavior.
“It’s pretty,” Pomni said, again, trying to get him to talk. He wasn’t fun when he was all clammed up, and she liked him more when he was relaxed and having fun. Maybe holding hands had been too much for him.
”Caine’s good at some things.”
”Like what?” She asked, trying to sound flirty. Boy, she was rusty. All it really earned her was a side-long look.
”Like skies, or horror movie plots, I guess.”
”Yeah, I guess. There was a whole lore to that house, you know.”
”Pfft, yeah. I know. Ragatha and Gangle yapped to that stupid ghost forever.”
”Not you?” Pomni asked, and now she was sitting so close that they had to move their hands so they were resting gently on top of their thighs. Jax was staring at them, and his thumb moved, to brush over her work pants. Wanting to encourage him, she inhaled audibly, as if she liked it, and then she bit her lower lip.
Usually the man kissed her, first, because she was generally rather dense and didn’t always catch when someone was hitting on her. But Jax was even more tentative than she was. Maybe this felt heavy and ‘real’ to him, too, and they were both kind of worried about what this could mean in the future. It didn’t have to mean anything, obviously. He’d been kind of looking at her out of the corner of his eye, but when she bit her lip he turned to stare, eyes narrow at first before they widened, and then he tore his hand away and turned his face from hers. But he didn’t move, so their bodies were still pressed along each other.
She’d never, not even for a moment, taken Jax to be shy. But, well, what else could this be? He was clearly into it. He was blushing, even as he crossed his arms and drew his legs up, closing himself off.
”Hey, Jax?”
He glanced at her, and she took a leap of faith. One of her hands grabbed the collar of his shirt, and she yanked him down, so her mouth could slam into his. It startled him, and his hands flung out, up, as if to say I’m not touching her. But when she pulled back, his expression betrayed him. As did the sharp little inhale he did, similar to her own, and how red his cheeks were. Before she could think through anything, she was sitting up on her knees and wrapping her arms around his neck, pressing her body against his to kiss him again.
Maybe if she’d stopped to think, she’d realize that the feeling wasn’t like it’d been for all her previous sexual partners. This felt a bit different. More warm. It filled her like drinking a cup of cocoa on a cold day might, pouring into every inch of her. But she wasn’t thinking much outside of the logistics of it. Especially as he relaxed, and slowly his hands wrapped around her, gently embracing her waist, sliding around her and pulling her gently against him, as if he wasn’t sure what to do with her. Weird.
When she pulled back this time, he was staring at her, eyes big, pupils small, and his breathing was hard and fast, like he was on the verge of a panic attack or something.
”Are you okay?”
”Uh, what the hell?” He asked.
”Oh, you don’t kiss? I guess I should have guessed, you don’t really seem the type. I like how it feels but the last guy I slept with wasn’t really into it either.”
”Slept— wait, what? What do you think we’re doing here?”
”Aren’t we going to f—uh, smash?” Pomni asked, managing to catch herself before she cursed and triggered the censor.
Jax didn’t seem to know what to do with that, because he clearly hadn’t thought he’d get this far. Or, well, maybe he’d never planned on having sex with her at all. Which really hadn’t occurred to her before this shaky look he was giving her. Oops. But then why had he brought her out here? Sat with her on the hood of the car? Held her hand? Let her look into his face this long while holding his cheeks? Unless it wasn’t exactly about sex but was instead—
“Oh,” She said, and sat back , hands falling between them so they rested on both of their legs at once.
”What?” He demanded.
”I just, um, sorry. I thought we were on the same page,” She said, shifting and kind of shrinking in on herself, “But I think I misunderstood.”
Jax made a face, “Don’t make this weird.”
”What do you mean? I messed up, and I’m sorry,” Pomni wasn’t a hundred percent sure she understood it any better now, but she was pretty sure she ‘got it’.
Of course there was a chance that she was still misunderstanding. But if she was right, then he wasn’t looking for sex, but maybe something a little…more. Which maybe would be kind of okay. Which surprised her, because she wasn’t exactly known for dating anyone. And if that didn’t work out, the aftermath would suck. Which of course it wouldn’t work out, because she wasn’t one for dating and of course he wouldn’t be serious, either. And then, on top of that, they were literally stuck together forever.
A true recipe for disaster.
Jax rolled his eyes, sat up, and cupped her chin. Although she knew she should fight it, at least a little, she didn’t. Instead, she let him pull her in and took the kiss he gave her like she knew she shouldn’t: with her eyes closed and her stomach flipping. Pomni tried not to think about it, even as she crawled forward, pressing herself into him, pushing him gingerly back against the windshield. He accepted her advances with grace, or maybe it was more timidity that made him lean back, letting her climb into his lap, straddling him, one of his shaky hands tentatively touching her hip before resting there, one thumb on her front, the fingers curled possessively around her, all while his other hand held her face so gingerly that she felt like glass.
”You’re not going to hurt me,” Pomni said, and Jax huffed, but said nothing. She nipped at his mouth, and he nipped back, shoving his face into hers with mild force, growling at her. Pomni laughed, and kissed him again, pushing against him, so he was laying back.
She slid her body down, over his, so they could feel every breath and movement the other made, and his hand adjusted so it was on her lower back instead of wrapped around her, but it held her tightly, as if he wanted her firmly where she was: draped over him, light weight bearing down on him. Her legs were still surrounding him, but she was totally draped on him like a blanket, her feet tucked up over his shins so her toes were between his legs. Jax made a soft noise in her mouth when she slid down, and she smiled a little as his other hand wrapped around her, brushing down over her back.
It had been a while since she’d slept with anyone, and she really hadn’t expected to sleep with anyone here. She still wasn’t sure how this would work. If it was standard, just purple, or if it was going to be weird, or if he was even going to have something to use at all. It would be strange to stop now to ask, and she was pretty sure she’d figure it out in a minute here, so might as well press forward.
Jax’s hands rubbed over her body, and his kissing was sloppy and unpracticed. She figured one of two things was happening here: either he was a total virgin, or he’d been in here a while and neither he nor Ragatha had gotten that desperate. Pomni broke their kiss, and he peered at her through half-lidded eyes, clearly annoyed. She laughed, softly, just a breath of one, and kissed under his chin, and then down his neck, one of her hands coming up to undo the buttons of his Spudsy’s uniform. She dipped her fingers inside so as she unbuttoned the shirt she touched his bare chest. Maybe on some level she’d wondered if he’d be furry.
Mercifully her brain refused to process much of how he felt, other than he felt warm and alive under her hands. Her brain simply translated all sensation of his skin, which she shouldn’t be able to feel through gloves anyway, as Jax. The way her gut tugged, her heart lurched, at the mere idea of it being Jax under her hands, letting her in, wanting her, too, should have made her run away. This was a bad idea.
Jax groaned under her when her teeth grazed the skin on his neck as her hands tugged his shirt free. She sat up, then straddled him properly, leaving him sprawled out on the hood of the car, breathless and overwhelmed. She pushed his shirt open, hands roaming his skin, and his hands rested on her thighs, and he was looking. Like a man starved, really. His breathing was very labored, and his hands rubbed over her thighs as he stared.
”Pomni,” He breathed.
”My turn, I know,” She said, playfully. Her hands came up to her own shirt, and she unbuttoned it, glancing between what she was doing and his shocked, hopeful, desperately hungry expression.
When her shirt was open enough that he could tell she had something going on, although barely much if she was being honest, he bit his lip. Just the barest hint of a chest, but she figured beggars really, really couldn’t be choosers. He’d have to hope another girl was stupid enough to join the Circus, and then he’d have to hope she was in a body suited for this (not like poor Gangle) and then he’d have to hope that they liked each other like they liked one another. She tugged her shirt free of her pants and as soon as she did, his hands helped her with the last two buttons, and he pulled her shirt open with such gusto that it startled her and the fabric made a loud thwang as he stretched it out to its limit.
”Relax,” Pomni said, laughing, “God.”
”You’re going too slow,” He complained. Both of his hands left the shirt to grab her breasts. Grab, definitely, and she winced, grabbing his wrists with her own hands.
”Softer, Jax. Yeesh, what kind of girls have you been with?”
”Stronger ones than you, I guess,” Jax bit back, but his hands eased up, and she sighed softly when he rubbed her nipples with his thumbs.
Great, okay, so she had something, at least. Right as she was wondering if they had the rest of their ‘parts’, she felt him. Stiff, against her thigh. Curious, she rocked forward, and Jax moaned, sharp and sudden in the dark night, and she moaned back, the bolt of pleasure from the combination of the feeling of him hot and new against her and the sound of his voice so white hot that she couldn’t stop herself. She let go of his wrists to place her hands on his shoulders, to give herself better leverage. Which she needed, because she was a bit lost in the sensation of everything, now.
His big hands rubbed and explored her breasts, as if they were brand new to him. Not her breasts, of course, because those were knew to him. But as if the whole concept of touching a breast was new to him. Her mouth hung open, so her soft pants were audible between them, and Jax’s own hard breathing came and went, as sometimes he seemed to hold his breath. To hear her better, she thought. He was so into her that he wanted to hear her enjoy his touch better. Which she thought was hot, which made her noises nicer for him, and it was this great big feedback loop that worked its way under her skin and settled against her very soul, hot and heavy and making her mouth water.
She leaned forward, and ground her hips against him, finding a rhythm that felt good, and soon he couldn’t keep his own noises back, either, and he was grinding up against her, too, until they were a desperate, grinding mass of two bodies, so close together in every way possible that it was hard to tell where one of them began and the other ended. And at some point she’d kissed him, again, and he’d accepted it, hands on her head and back as hers held his face to hers. Their breath and sounds mingled, breaking out from between them in broken, wet, hot gasps.
Sooner than she liked he tensed up, and grunted into her, and she let out a soft, sharp little cry, rocking her hips with purpose, enjoying the feel of him coming through layers of clothing. That helped her over the edge, and a warm, tense orgasm worked its way through her, leaving her tingling and hot and panting for breath. She hadn’t lost control of herself in years. It felt good. No, actually; it felt great. Even now, lying in a puddle on top of him, both of their breathing mingling in hoarse gasps, his arms still wrapped around her, hers limply hanging at her sides, she felt good. Satisfied. Like she’d needed that more than she knew.
“That was something,” She said, shifting just a bit, so her head was up on his shoulder, so her breath brushed his throat and their bare chests were pressed together. Jax’s hands on her body stilled.
”For the record,” Jax said, “I did not ask you out here for this.”
”You didn’t ask me out here at all,” Pomni said, and when he opened his mouth, she continued before he could speak, “You offered to drive me home because I don’t have a car.”
His mouth clicked shut, and she could feel his brain kick into overdrive. He’d kind of admitted he’d meant to ask her out. That he’d never intended on taking her straight home. That this was, in fact, some kind of two person outing. Whether or not he’d meant it romantically remained to be seen. Well, no, what really remained to be seen was whether or not he’d own up to it. She had her suspicions that he would not.
“How long until you can go again?”
“Uh?” He said, and she shifted on him, one hand trailing down his chest and undoing his belt. He shivered under her.
”You’re pretty young, right? I know some guys can go right away, and it’s probably been a while..?” Pomni said, with no jealousy in her voice.
Jax quirked a brow anyway, “Well duh. Who was I going to have sex with? Ragatha? God, gross.”
”She’s pretty.”
”Pretty annoying, maybe.”
Pomni snorted and unzipped his pants, which really got his attention, because he tried to sit up. Which would have jostled her, or made her get off his lap, and that would make riding him much harder, so she shoved him back down gently but firmly, leaving no room for debate. To her surprise, he complied, eyes wide. She rubbed a thumb over the band of his boxers, which were a fake brand Caine must have come up with, because he wasn’t terribly original, and neither were these.
Under her, Jax was very still, though his breathing was hard, and she was pretty sure he’d have no issues getting hard again for her. Whether or not that was his natural drive, how long he hadn’t gotten laid, or one positive for being in a simulated world, she couldn’t say. It was likely a mix, although the last option was mostly likely as their bodies didn’t need to make a ton of real-world sense. Ragatha routinely got hurt beyond what a normal human could take, as an example.
Curious about what he was packing, she really wasn’t wasting any time. It definitely had more to do with her own eagerness but there was another part of her that was aware their time together was limited. No doubt Caine would notice they were ‘missing’ soon enough. Or, well, maybe he wouldn’t. Wouldn’t Jax know if they were going to get caught? He didn’t seem like the type to get them caught on purpose. Not because he was a good guy, but because if he got them caught the likelihood of this happening again was zero.
Her hand brushed over his boxers, and as soon as she hit the wet spot on the front, from where he’d already finished, he was shoving his pants down. His cock sprang free, and Pomni made a noise. It was much bigger than she’d expected it to be, but mainly because she’d expected small or average on the side of small. Not because of anything he’d done but because she hadn’t thought his pants could hide anything bigger than that. But of course, she should have guessed, logic didn’t really matter here. Her noise and expression had made him cocky and proud, and he grinned up at her.
”I’ll go easy on you.”
”Please,” Pomni said, rolling her eyes but smiling anyway.
”Well, if you’d rather it be rough, I’m sure I can find some way to deliver for you, Pomni.”
”Uh huh. I bet. Too bad, you don’t have any say,” Pomni said, and for the briefest of moments he looked very into that, and his dick twitched. Ah, well. So he liked a girl in charge. Good for him, he’d found a pretty good partner in that case. She wasn’t against it. He moved to her belt, then, and both of his hands came up to undo it, tugging it free and tossing it into the grass.
She opened her mouth to complain, then realized she didn’t usually wear a belt here, and that even if she did, Caine could and would probably just snap his fingers at her and put her back in her standard outfit. So, in short, who cared?
”Take it off,” Jax said, yanking her pants, and Pomni laughed, swatting at his hands. He grinned, tugging harder, jostling her in his lap. “Come on, what’s the problem? Take them off. Chop chop.”
Pomni shook him off and stood up, over him, shoving them down, hopping from foot to foot until she’d managed to kick both her shoes off and squirm out of her pants. She tossed them to the side and looked back down at him. Poor guy looked like he was on the verge of a total mental collapse. He was staring, wide-eyed, and his cock was leaking, just looking at her, and she was fairly certain he was drooling. Boy, this place must do a number on you the longer you were here.
”You okay?”
”Underwear?” He asked, choking a bit and swallowing, hard, wiping his mouth.
”Oh, I don’t wear those.”
”Ever?”
”I don’t think so, no,” Pomni said, “They’re annoying.”
Of course she couldn’t remember exactly what she wore in real life, none of them really could, but they all had some assumptions based on preferences now. And Pomni was pretty sure she didn’t wear underwear if she could help it. Although maybe that was a ‘circus’ thing. It didn’t really matter, because she was never getting out. This was her life now: fucking purple bunnies on the hood of a fake car in the middle of an impossible field under a gorgeous but simulated night sky.
”That’s hot,” Jax said, and she thought he sounded…off. When her vision focused back on him, he was looking kind of…concerned? But as soon as their eyes met he grabbed her ankles and jerked her, so she almost fell on top of him. “Should let me have a taste.”
”A taste?” Pomni echoed, surprised. “I didn’t take you for the type.”
“Even you think I’m selfish?” Jax said, clicking his tongue and shaking his head, “What’s a guy to do? Everyone’s a critic.”
”Mm, yeah, that’s on the rest of us. You bear no responsibility here.”
”I knew you were on my side,” Jax sat up, climbing up her rather short legs with both hands. He was all playful smiles, until he got pretty close to his goal and his tongue stuck out between his teeth.
Pomni stepped forward when he tugged her lightly, and gasped out loud when his tongue made contact with her lips. She enjoyed most parts of sex, but she especially liked when a guy took time to make sure she enjoyed herself as thoroughly as possible. A lot of her previous lovers hadn’t bothered. That Jax was? Well, that was a pleasant surprise. And it was a bonus that his tongue was absolutely stupidly big. Or maybe her pussy was small, it was hard to tell which was the bigger contributing factor. Either way, it felt incredible. As soon as he licked between her folds and that big cartoon tongue touched her clit, she sank against his mouth with a moan. Both of her hands grabbed his ears, and she felt his gasp between her legs. Clearly he didn’t mind a little rough treatment.
Jax held her as he laid back, easing her down. Not that she could have fought him if she’d wanted to, her legs were incredibly unstable. In fact, she was kind of trembling. She let out a sharp little cry when she settled down, thighs around his head, and he finally got to go to town. The guy was not shy. And if he was unpracticed, the sheer size of his tongue disguised it. She rocked her hips against his mouth, but it was more out of instinct than necessity, he was enthusiastically lapping at her like his entire life depended on it. The hands on her thighs kneaded her skin, gently squeezing and massaging her thighs, enhancing the intensity, really highlighting the feeling of his exploring tongue.
She had been kind of lost in the sensations for a moment, head tossed back, moaning without worry of being caught. After all, Caine could see them if he chose to regardless of any precautions taken and nobody else would be out this far. But now she peered down, to see if Jax was enjoying it as much as he seemed to be. His eyes were half-lidded, and he looked almost like he was on drugs, all zoned out and hazy, and he was watching her face. Which made her gut twist and her heart lurch and it made her instinctively want to pull away. But when she squeezed his head to try to stand up, his hands held her down, and the shift in position made it so that his tongue covered her clit entirely, all broad and wet.
“Jax,” Pomni breathed, and both of her hands grabbed his, trying to get him to let her go, more from instinct than from actual desire to stop right on the very edge of orgasm.
His thumb brushed over her, and his hands gave her a gentle squeeze, and she looked down at him again. He dragged his face up, so his tongue flattened against her, and as he dragged up it glided between her lips and over her clit, one long, drawn-out stroke that finally did it. She let out a little cry and shoved down against his mouth, tilting her hips forward and leaning back, tossing her head and moaning, voice pitching sharply as he buried his face back in her, tongue eager, as if bringing her to orgasm had only been the beginning of his plans for her.
”Jax,” She said again, legs shaking, hands prying at his. Her body throbbed, and it was kind of feeling like a little too much. “Stop.”
For once, he listened. He eased her back, so she was sitting on his chest, one hand holding her so she wouldn’t collapse, the other wiping at his mouth, which was soaked. Drool or her own wetness, she imagined. Not that he seemed to care, really, his eyes were still half-lidded and heavy, and they were trained between her legs, clearly admiring the way she twitched and throbbed from the stimulation he’d provided. He was lucky she wasn’t easily embarrassed. If she was Gangle or Ragatha she might have been trying to hide her body’s natural reaction. But Pomni’d had enough experience by now that nothing in bed really embarrassed her. Not if she was sure her partner was also into it.
And she was sure Jax was into it. Not only because he was clearly still salivating, but because that had been entirely his doing. Pomni took a moment to get her strength back, and when she was certain her legs would support her weight again, she sat up on her knees. He clearly thought she was going to resume her spot on her throne, because he opened his mouth right up, ready to accept her. But she scooted backwards, instead, until she felt his dick hit her ass. Jax’s eyes widened briefly, and he let out a huff of breath as she sat up straight so she could position herself over him. She grabbed the base of his cock, and Jax groaned out loud, his hands tightening their grip on her thighs.
For a moment she looked away from his face, looking down instead to see what she was working with. It was, delightfully, totally normal. Well, okay, it was purple, and the strange silky texture the rest of him was. But it felt like a dick, even when she pressed its pink head to her entrance. Jax, under her, moaned as if it had been decades since he’d gotten any. He pressed up into her desperately, and his moan broke into a shrill little gasp, and she had to push both hands down onto his shoulders to keep him from flipping them both over so he could take control. Not that she’d mind him losing it, that was kind of (really) hot. But they weren’t in a bed where they could flip around all over the place, and if she let him chase whatever he was feeling, he’d finish in a few minutes flat. If that.
Pomni held him down with both hands, sort of, because it was more like a suggestion at her current size and strength, but he complied, thankfully. She leaned forward, letting him slide out of her, and then she slammed back down, grunting when she bottomed out. It didn’t hurt but if they’d been out in the real world, that would have been too deep. Here, though, it just felt kind of ‘too full’, like she was being stretched out from taking too much. It was almost pleasant, actually, although when she repeated the motion, she made sure to go a bit slower so it didn’t startle her again.
That didn’t last very long, though, as her short little gasps when she lowered herself back down on him again and again filled the space between them. Jax was making plenty of noise, too, staring up at her, switching between her face and where they connected. Each time he looked down at her sliding back down on his dick she could feel him throb inside her. Which made her whimper and grind down against him, trying to get some friction on her clit, even though the feeling of being stuffed with him was good on its own. She’d never had a partner so vocal and so into it. Obviously her previous partners had liked sleeping with her but nobody had liked anything she’d ever done like Jax liked this.
His hands grabbed her, hard, and he made a keening sound, near a whine, and his eyes screwed shut. Too fast, she thought, she really wanted to ride this out for a while, to enjoy the ease of not being scared, and maybe to pretend a little longer she didn’t completely understand the weight on her heart that she’d have to address soon enough.
”Pomni,” He growled, and Pomni opened her mouth to say something, but he grabbed her shirt, and her hat, and next thing she knew he was kissing her fiercely, choking her on his tongue, his panting breaths and deep, guttural moans filling her mouth and drowning out her own response of sharp little cries. One cry for every thrust as he went too deep and made her throb and stretch around him. Her hands grabbed at him, and she frantically ground against him as he desperately thrust into her, the sound of their coupling filling the otherwise quiet night. They broke their kiss just enough, tongues still pressed together, mouths still brushing against one another, but both of their mouths open, so their moans and breathing escaped them. They were covered in liquid: sweat, semen, and Pomni’s lubricant. And drool, actually, Jax was drooling a lot, like he was in heat or something.
Which she didn’t think he was, probably. Did rabbits do that? Maybe, actually. Well, but she wasn’t like…funny? So he wasn’t really a rabbit, right? Since she wasn’t really a jester. Though she figured ‘jester’ was a job title, and you could be bad at a job. She yelped when he yanked her hat, hard, jerking her neck.
”Jax!” She snapped.
”Pay attention,” Jax growled.
How he’d noticed she was distracted, she didn’t know. But he shoved deep in her, as if to drive home what she should be paying attention to. Pomni gasped, and he kissed her again, one of his hands grabbing at her, pushing her chest off his just enough to grope at her breast. It was kind of rough, and she was about to tell him that, when he grunted and froze for a moment. Pomni had never let a guy come inside her without a condom, and she was surprised to feel it happen now, as if him coming hadn’t even occurred to her.
It had, somewhere deep in her mind, but not any place she had ready access to. Like a dormant kink, almost, because as soon as she felt his dick twitching and the sensation of him ‘pumping’ into her, little jerky twitches of his cock combined with the sticky warm feeling of cum filing her up, she moaned sharply. She slid a hand down between them, and hastily rubbed at her clit. It didn’t take much, especially as he groaned out a quiet:
”Holy hell.”
Something about that pushed her over the edge, and she came, too, with a soft whimper as she clamped down and throbbed around him, earning her a gasp and a delirious moan from him. They laid on the hood of the car, totally spent, him still inside her, her mostly-naked body pressed to his, one of his hands on one of her legs, holding her where she lay straddled across him, the other on her head, thumb rubbing absently. Pomni tugged her hand free, so it was no longer squeezed between them, and she wrapped it around him, her other hand stroking the side of his body idly. Both of them enjoyed the warm, fuzzy, tingling that accompanied a good post-orgasm cuddle.
“You’ve got a key to my room, right?” Pomni asked, finally, and Jax’s stroking faltered.
”I have a key to every room, Pomni. Have you been feeling left out?” He teased, “I can hide some bugs in there for you, too, if you’re jealous of Raggy.”
”No,” Pomni said, with a laugh, “I had something else in mind.”
“Like what?”
”Well…” Pomni said, laughing softly, “I wonder what kind of things we could get up to regularly…?”
Jax was quiet for a moment and then he let out a quiet, “Ah.”
”I mean, if you want to.”
”Mm, let’s think, do I want to keep having sex? I’m just a guy, Pomni.”
”Does that mean the answer is ‘yes’?”
”That means the answer is ‘absolutely I do’,” Jax said emphatically.
”Great,” Pomni said, and before she could catch the urge and stifle it, she turned her head to kiss his chest. He stiffened up under her, and she realized belatedly that was too tender. Too soft. This wasn’t a relationship! Just (really fun, really good) sex.
She’d just have to be really careful, because something told her that she might be developing a little bit of a crush. But she could handle that, and she wasn’t about to not have sex for the rest of eternity because for the first time in her life she’d gone and developed misguided romantic feelings. If that’s even what this was the beginning of! It was entirely possible, and likely plausible, that she was simply trauma bonding to Jax because she found him the most interesting and (somehow) the most likeable of the others. Except Kinger, but she couldn’t do much with him unless it was in the dark. Not that she’d have sex with Kinger anyway. Not when the guy she really wanted—
Oh, well. Shit. That was going to be a problem, wasn’t it?
“We’d better get going,” Pomni said, before he could shove her off or something equally Jax-y that would ruin the warmth of the moment. “Caine’s going to wonder.”
”Nah,” Jax said, but let her go so she could sit up. “He was probably watching.”
”Gross,” Pomni laughed, and he grinned at her.
She tried not to think about Jax watching her as she climbed off him. Or when she slid off the roof of the car and gathered her pants. Or as she slid back into them, wincing as the fabric ran over her slick thighs. Gross. When she turned back around, buttoning her shirt, he was sitting on the edge of the hood, watching her, expression serious. He was pretty much back to how he’d been before they’d hooked up, the only remaining evidence the wet spots on his own clothes.
“How do we…?” She began, gesturing.
”Eh,” Jax shrugged, “I think I’ve got to drop you home.”
”You’re kidding.”
”Come on,” He gestured, holding his hand out. Pomni stared, then realized what he wanted, and put his car key in his palm.
They drove down the false road in silence, windows down, so the wind gently blew against their faces. Jax had turned on the radio, leaning away from her, with one elbow out his window, propping his head in his hand as he drove. Pomni sat in her chair, facing the wind, sticking one hand out into the night air, trying not to think about how they really, really didn’t need all of their senses and yet here she was, smelling sex as it permeated the car.
The longer they were sitting there in silence the more it sunk in what they’d done. Maybe that had been kind of stupid, actually. Just as she was starting to wonder how badly she’d messed up her life in the circus, and how mean and weird he was going to be in the future, Jax shifted beside her. The hand out the window came in to take the steering wheel, and then the hand on the wheel dropped between them, so it grazed her thigh. Pomni glanced at him, but he only moved his hand back to his own leg, casual as anything, and she smiled a little. Well, then. Maybe it hadn’t been such a bad idea, after all. Maybe everything was going to be just fine.
As fine as it could be, anyway, considering the circumstances.
The apartment building that she instinctively knew was ‘hers’ was a nice old brick building, each apartment with a porch. Every apartment had blinds drawn, some with lights on and some with lights off, except hers. It was on the second floor, and she could see a large television through the sliding glass door, along with a little bit of a couch. Must be easier on the system to only load what was necessary, she guessed. Though why she had an apartment at all was lost on her. Why did it need to be this realistic?
”What’s yours look like?” Pomni asked, suddenly, realizing she could picture her place in her mind’s eye. Not for long, it kept slipping, but enough to get a feel for it.
Jax frowned, “What do you mean?”
”Your place?”
”Why? You want to come back with me? Gosh, Pompom, you’re insatiable. Well, if you’re so eager…”
”Ugh,” Pomni rolled her eyes and kicked her door open with a short scoff, “Never mind. I’m going.”
Jax was out of the car, too, and she turned to look at the sound of his door shutting. He strode confidently around the car, and up the sidewalk towards her building. Pomni faltered, but then followed him, jogging to catch up so she could walk beside him. Jax had his hands in his pockets, and he was looking quite relaxed. They stopped at the front door, a glass one that opened into a small room with mailboxes and a second door just beyond them, which was propped open with a brick. Under the mailboxes was an overflowing trashcan, filled up with junk mail.
Pomni turned to look at him as he turned to look at her. It kind of felt like a date walking her to her door. She tucked her hands behind her back and rocked back on her heels, feeling kind of nervous. Which was kind of weird, considering what they’d just been doing.
”So…” She said, sounding unsure, “I’ll…see you…back home?”
It felt stupid to say, but she didn’t really know what he was expecting walking her to her building. So she didn’t exactly know what to say to him.
”If there was anywhere else I could be, I would. But I can’t!” He laughed, “So, yeah. I’ll see you at home.”
”I had fun. Thanks for the ride,” Pomni said.
”Nothing like a shift at Spudsy’s, huh. I bet Caine will love that you loved it.”
Pomni frowned, not sure what to make of that. Either he was being genuine, and Caine would be happy that he’d found something to work for one of his pickiest critics…or she’d inadvertently pissed the guy off. Either was possible. She was so caught up in her thoughts about Caine, and what she had done to possibly anger him and what that meant for her in the future, that she hadn’t noticed Jax lean over her. And she hadn’t noticed when he’d brought a hand up to grab her hat. In fact, she didn’t notice much of anything until he tugged her head back, so she was forced to look up at him.
Annoyed, she opened her mouth to snap at him, but his mouth covered hers before she could complain. Startled, her hands hovered up, not touching him, and she hesitated before she kissed him back, softly leaning into him, hand on his chest. Maybe she’d invite him up to hang out for a bit. They could talk. Well, okay, Jax didn’t really seem the ‘talking’ type, but maybe they could try.
”Alright. See you.” He said, letting her go, and heading back towards his car.
Pomni stared after him for a moment, and then she let herself into the building and made her way to her apartment.