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The Rise and Fall of Sirius Black and the Spiders from Mars

Summary:

"DAVID MOTHERFUCKING BOWIE JUST WINKED AT ME AFTER HE SAID THAT HE LIKED MY HAIR ACCESSORY"

"Pads"

"MY HAIR ACCESSORY IS MY WAND!"

"Padfoot"

"DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?!?"

"Sirius, I swear to god."

"BOWIE IS A WIZARD!!"

or:
What if Sirius and Remus went to a David Bowie concert and found out their favourite musician is a wizard?

Notes:

David Bowie was a wizard and I will die on this hill
enjoy :) <3

 

edit: Orphaned because I no longer associate with this fandom. If you're reading this, perhaps consider leaving as well. This really is just one fandom, there's so much other cool stuff out there that you can enjoy without indirectly supporting TERF's

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

I’m an alligator

- David Bowie (Moonage Daydream)

 

Sirius didn’t think his day could get any better. It was his birthday, so of course it couldn’t get any better, but what came next was a truly unexpected but in absolutely no way unwelcome surprise.


 

Friday the 4th of November 1977

The annual largest Birthday Party of Hogwarts was, as always, a complete success. Of course it was, it was Sirius’ party after all, even though he had to wait another whole day since his actual birthday was on a Thursday, how dare it.

Said birthday boy could be found dancing to ABBA (he would never admit that to James) in the middle of the dance floor in one second, snogging Remus against a wall in the next, and maybe, if he found someone interesting enough, you were actually able to see him hold a conversation with someone for more than 3 seconds.

However, this story isn’t really about partying.

Because at this exact moment, Remus took a deep breath, summoned all the Gryffindor bravery he ever had stored up in his body, approached his, surprisingly sober, Boyfriend and dragged him up the stairs into the Marauders’ dorm, where they fortunately didn’t interrupt any couples. 

As Sirius tried to initiate what he hoped would be another mind-blowing make-out session, he was stopped by Remus’ finger on his lips.

Shush, we can do more of that later, but first I want to finally give you your second birthday present

They had agreed on giving Sirius his presents yesterday, so he was a tiny bit confused when Remus mentioned another one?  “ I thought those vinyls were my present?

You really thought a few vinyls were your only present from me? I’m a little disappointed, honestly.

Oi! Being the dramatic one is my job in this relationship.

Remus rolled his eyes at him. “ Whatever, close your eyes and hold out your hands.

Sirius obeyed as Remus got two small papers from his trunk and placed them on Sirius’ open hands

Alright , you can open your eyes. ” Remus watched Sirius with anticipation as he inspected the piece of paper in his hand.

Sirius jaw dropped as Remus started to explain before the older boy could even think of a word to say, “ I know you’ve wanted to see him for ages and well, me as well, but anyway, my mum somehow managed to get her hand on those, god knows how, and then sent them to me, and I know it’s half a year until then, but I physically couldn’t keep the secret anymore, and I hope you like it, and I’m honestly probably m–

His rambling was interrupted by Sirius’ lips on his own and a bone-crushing hug that probably squashed one or two organs in the process as well.

Remus may or may not have organized Bowie concert tickets, maybe, who knows.

He let himself be pushed against the wall, grinned widely into their kiss and honestly, he would buy Sirius concert tickets for any musician he wanted to see if it meant being kissed like that.

 

Remus and Sirius did not return to the party, instead they built a gigantic pillow fort (normal 18-year-old behavior, thank you very much) and spent the rest of their evening cuddled up in layers upon layers of blankets.

Somewhere between soft kisses, comfortable cuddles and falling asleep, Remus still managed to get out the two-word question to which he desperately wanted an answer.

Good Present?

Sirius looked at him with an almost shocked expression, “ Good?? Moony, this is the best present I’ve ever gotten in 18 Years. Are you kidding me??

Remus' face lit up as if he’d just won the lottery (which he already had, let’s be honest) and pulled Sirius closer again. “ M’glad you like it

He pulled Sirius closer, resting his chin on top of the other boy’s head.  

Moony? ” came the mumbled question from Sirius

Yes, Padfoot?

Have I ever told you how much I love you?

Remus chuckled into Sirius’ hair. “ I’m pretty sure that that’s why we’re a couple, love, remember?

Just wanted to remind you

 

Rwy'n dy garu di Padfoot

Je t’aime aussi Moony

 

 

Wednesday the 19th of June 1978

The concert was in June, therefore, they had to wait almost half a year until they could finally see their favorite musician live.

Everyone in Gryffindor House, no matter if 1st or 7th year, would confirm how insufferable both of them were about it.

But now it finally was June, and Remus and Sirius were standing in front of the Apollo*, aka the place where they would finally get to see Bowie.

After what seemed like several eternities, they were finally standing in front of the stage, and as David Bowie entered the stage, Remus almost fainted. It was one thing hearing and seeing pictures of his gay awakening, but him standing in front of him was the cherry on top.

After he finished the first song, Heroes, he seemed to scan the crowd until his eyes landed on Sirius of all people. He proceeded to wink at him, saying, “Lovely hair accessories we’ve got here in the first row here.” 

The next thing Remus saw was how his Boyfriend's jaw dropped lower than he knew was possible up to that moment. He turned around and started screaming.

"MOONY, DID YOU SEE THAT?!?

"Yes, I did Pads, calm down."

"DAVID MOTHERFUCKING BOWIE JUST WINKED AT ME AFTER HE SAID THAT HE LIKED MY HAIR ACCESSORY"

"Pads"

"MY HAIR ACCESSORY IS MY WAND!"

"Padfoot"

"DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS?!?"

"Sirius, I swear to god."

"BOWIE IS A WIZARD!!"

"SIRIUS ORION BLACK, WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP?"

Remus looked around to ensure no one was listening. "Or do you want us to go to bloody Azkaban for breaking the bloody statue of secrecy?"

Sirius' eyes widened as he muttered an apology

But as always, Remus couldn't stay mad at him for too long. "Yes, Pads, I saw it and yes, I know I owe you 10 Galleons, but please try to keep yourself together and not reveal the wizarding world to the whole of Britain."

The next hour was the best hour of Sirius' life

And as 'Moonage Daydream' started to play, the couple forgot everything around them, nothing mattered anymore, just them and their song, just two boys being in love.

Remus wasn't one to lie but he was sure he saw Bowie shoot them a smiling glance once or twice, as if to say:

 

'I see you, and I'm very happy for you'

Notes:

*“The Apollo” was a music venue in Glasgow that was open from 1973 until 1985 and Bowie was performing there for 4 concerts during his Isolar II world tour in 1978.

Moonage Daydream wasn’t on the setlist and Heroes was the second song, not the first but I truly don’t give a fuck :).

Anywho
Thank you for reading! I love reading comments, so, if you have something to say, say it!!