Chapter Text
“Play one more fucking ballad and see what happens, Han!”
“What's so wrong with wanting to serenade my man?” Han pouted in response while Lee
Know, also in the back seat, rolled his eyes with a secretly smitten smile.
Felix’s eyes became impossibly wide. “There are two other people in the car! That's
what's wrong!”
Han paused, as if this was a new fact being presented to him. He snapped, like he finally
got it. “You feel left out, don't you Lixie? Don't worry, I can serenade you too.”
Felix groaned and tightened his grip on Hyunjin's knee almost painfully. “I will not hurt
Han, I will not hurt Han, murder is wrong.” He muttered over and over to himself like an incantation.
Hyunjin smiled and placed his hand on top of Felix’s, squeezing the small fingers and the darkened scars gently.
The beach trip had been wonderful. Even when I.N. thought it would be funny to tell Han that he’d seen Lee Know slip under the waves and not resurface. Even when Han rallied every single lifeguard in a five mile radius to find his beloved. Even when Lee Know showed back up fifteen minutes later with two ice cream cones and a stunned look on his face, asking who died.
Despite all of that, it was a long weekend filled with laughs and rap battles and delicious food from chef Minnie.
And for Hyunjin, there had been another makeshift bed with Felix that they couldn’t truly call their own. He sighed lightly and turned his head minutely toward the omega.
“When we get back to campus, we should start looking at apartments. See what’s available.”
Felix bit his lip, trying to keep his ear to ear grin at bay. “Okay.”
“You guys are going to get an apartment?” Han crowed from the backseat. “Can we come?”
Felix scoffed. “The whole idea of getting the apartment is to have some privacy. So no. You cannot come, Han.”
“Why don’t you and Lee Know get a place?” Hyunjin offered. Partly because he honestly thought it made a lot of sense for them. Partly because he wanted to watch them squirm and blush and throw longing glances at one another. They were so fucking obvious.
They both muttered something about how that might be a good idea or something or whatever and then lapsed into silence, their hands loosely clasped together on the middle seat between them.
Felix smirked, shooting Hyunjin a little glance. He knew exactly what he was doing and he approved.
The drive was quiet and peaceful after that, especially after Han passed out in the backseat, dramatically slumped against the window.
Of course, when Felix pulled up to drop Han and Lee Know at Han’s house, he hit the brakes just a little hard, launching Han forward and into the back of Hyunjin’s seat.
“I’m awake!” He yelled, eyes roving around as he saw his house outside the window with his parents huddled on the front porch.
“I think I’m going to throw up,” Lee Know muttered, his eyes wide and terrified.
“Don’t worry Minnie, they’re going to love you.” Han said with a big smile as he leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Gentlemen,” he said with one foot already out the door. “Thanks for the ride. I’ll be knocking on your window later tonight.”
Hyunjin could see Felix getting ready to whine about that but Han, a man who’d been dealing with this for many many years, had already leapt out of the backseat and dug their bags out of the trunk. Lee Know smiled, looking a bit sickly, and exited the car with a weak wave.
“Lee Know is every parents dream, right?” Hyunjin wondered out loud as Felix pulled back out on the road. “He’s responsible, studying to be a doctor…he’s not hideous …they’ll like him. Right?”
Felix just shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. I think so. But Han’s never brought anyone home. So I don’t really know how they’ll react.”
Hyunjin nodded. It made sense. “What about you? Have you ever brought anyone home?”
Felix scoffed, as if the idea was completely absurd. “No. You will be the first. And the last.”
Hyunjin felt like his heart was going to burst out of his chest. Felix was so sure. So certain. And it’s not that Hyunjin wasn’t; he was. But it was sort of amazing to be reminded that Felix felt the exact same way. That this was just the beginning of everything.
“What if they don’t like me though?” He was mostly joking. Mostly.
Felix just rolled his eyes and turned into a long driveway. “You heard my mom on that video call. She thinks you’re handsome and respectful. I think you’re in the clear.”
Hyunjin took a deep breath, swallowing around the lump in his throat as they pulled up to the house with two positively tiny women standing out front.
They stepped out of the car only to have Felix's mom immediately come up to them.
“Yongbokie! Introduce me to this boy of yours!”
Felix rolled his eyes but smiled fondly. He placed a hand on Hyunjin's back. “Mom, this is Hwang Hyunjin. Hyunjin, this is my mom, Lee Misook. And the brat behind her is my baby sister Liz.”
“Don't call me that! I'm not a baby, Lix.” The teenage girl pouted before flipping on a strong smile and holding her hand out to Hyunjin like she was expecting him to kiss it. “It's so good to finally meet you, Hyunjin.” Her voice was dripping with sugar suddenly.
Hyunjin smiled in a way that he hoped didn't look too incredibly awkward as he took her hand and shook it like a limp noodle. “It's nice to finally meet you both.”
Felix snorted. “Is that my top, Liz?”
Liz wretched her hand out of Hyunjin's, her face turning bright red. “Oh my god, shut up!” with a flustered look thrown at Hyunjin, she turned and fled into the house.
Misook let out a long suffering sigh and looked apologetically at Hyunjin before turning her gentle glare on her son.
“Yongbokie,” she said in an admonishing tone. “Be nice to her. She's missed you.”
“So she steals my clothes and flirts with my boyfriend?”
Misook just shook her head, looked tired and amused. “I promise, we're usually more civil than this.” She said to the alpha.
Hyunjin just smiled. Felix's mom seemed tired. He hoped they hadn't kept her up too late with their arrival.
“I'm assuming that with Yongbok’s black hole of a stomach, you already stopped to get dinner on the road, right?”
Hyunjin snickered, seeing the frown the omega had out of the corner of his eye. “Yeah. He only made it an hour into the drive before he was complaining that his blood sugar levels had dropped dangerously low.”
“Hey! As the driver, I was just being responsible. I needed food to stay alert.”
“But why did you need three burgers?”
“I wanted to taste test them!”
Misook was watching their exchange like a tennis match. A fond smile was painted on her face. “Well could I still interest you in a cup of tea?”
“I would love that.” Hyunjin replied.
Misook smiled and started to make her way inside. Her steps were slow. Lethargic almost. “Get your bags inside. I'll start the kettle.”
Hyunjin couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped his lips as he helped Felix pull all the luggage out of the car and into the house. Felix was such a force to be reckoned with, even around his mom and sister. He loved how feisty his omega was.
They made their way upstairs and down a long hallway to the last door on the left. Felix’s room was exactly what Hyunjin had expected. He wondered for the first time if Felix’s particular interior design tastes had anything to do with his mom doing it for a living. He wondered if their styles were similar. Was it learned or was it something he had just been born with? He was antsy to investigate the house and find out.
So when the omega yawned and stretched out his back, saying he needed to wash up because “how could you not after almost five hours in a car with the smell of Han’s onion rings?” Hyunjin ambled his way downstairs.
Almost immediately, he heard the whistle of a kettle drawing him deeper into the house. He was nervous. He’d never met anyone’s parents before. But he thought about how touched he’d been by Felix’s willingness to talk to his parents and build that relationship and figured he could be brave. He could pretend he wasn’t ready to fucking run and hide out of fear that Misook would decide he wasn’t good enough for her only son.
Shyly, Hyunjin walked into the kitchen. He noticed the way his shoulders were hunched ever so slightly, trying to make himself smaller. Less threatening. Or perhaps less noticeable.
Misook turned around, as if sensing a presence. Her smile was soft and gentle. Her eyes crinkled in the corners, just like Felix’s did. “Why don’t you take a seat? Tea is almost ready.”
Hyunjin nodded politely, sitting down at the small table in the kitchen. He watched Felix’s mom putter around the kitchen quietly before bringing two cups over to the table. She set one in front of Hyunjin and the other across from him. But she didn’t sit.
“Hyunjin,” she said softly, her voice sounding like fallen leaves. “Were you…” she paused, looking down at her feet, as if the words she was struggling to find would be piled up there. “When Yongbok went into his last heat, you were the alpha who got him out of that party…weren’t you?”
Hyunjin froze. He hadn’t been expecting that. He nodded, eyes wary.
Misook nodded in return. “Then I have even more to thank you for.” She bowed deeply, her back parallel to the floor. “Thank you for getting Yongbok out of that party. And thank you for staying with him after he was attacked. I will forever be in your debt.”
The formality of it all had Hyunjin struggling to catch his breath. “Ms. Lee, please, no.” He said hurriedly, standing up as well. He reached out, wanting to touch her shoulders, pull her up, make her stop bowing but pulled his hands back instead, not wanting to overstep.
She peaked up and smiled at the alpha’s obviously flustered state. She straightened up. She took pity on the boy, taking a seat at the table. She gestured to his vacant chair until he sat down again.
“When we brought Yongbok home during his last heat, he had this hoodie that he refused to take off. It didn’t smell like him and it was easily a size or two too big, so I knew it wasn’t one of his.” Misook was cradling the cup of tea between her small hands. Hands even smaller than Felix’s. She was gazing into the golden liquid as if she was reading the leaves. “He just kept saying it was alpha’s. But when I asked who alpha was, he would get all quiet and teary eyed and say that it didn’t matter because alpha probably hated him now.”
Hyunjin felt his brow furrow. He knew it had been a bad heat. Felix had told him it was the worst he’d ever had. But it was hard to hear about how he’d thought Hyunjin could ever hate him.
A slow smile bloomed on Misook’s face. “And then, not long after, I’m getting a call that he has a boyfriend. And he’s this sweet alpha named Hyunjin.” She looked up from her teacup to smile more fully at Hyunjin. “I figured you must have been the same alpha who saved him the night of his heat.”
Hyunjin’s mouth felt dry, like he didn’t really know how to respond.
Misook continued, the gentle smile on her face flattening. “And then, a few months later and…Han called to tell us about the…attack.” Her voice cracked on the last word. She stared down at her tea, grounding herself. “And I was ready to drop everything and come to the campus. But then I heard that you were there.” Her eyes flicked up. She smiled lightly. “And I knew he'd be okay. I knew you would be able to help him in ways I never could. I got him in therapy when he got home, made sure he talked about it and didn't just let it sit and fester. But that's all I can do. I'm not his alpha. I'm not even an omega. Sometimes I feel like what I can do for Yongbokie is so limited.” She bit her lip, brow furrowed in worry and Hyunjin couldn't hold back anymore.
He reached out, cradling her small hand in-between his. “Felix loves you. Thank you for placing so much trust in me and I promise, I will always do my best to make sure Felix is safe and happy. But I could never ever replace you. I can't offer the advice or love that you do as his mother.” He shrugged, “We all just help in different ways. Giving him the opportunity to see a therapist after all of that…that's invaluable. That's not nothing.”
Misook nodded her head in agreement, ever so slightly. “He won't press charges.” She said, shaking her head like she didn't agree. “He says there isn't solid evidence against the friend and getting the attacker in trouble doesn't feel like justice.” She shrugged and Hyunjin had to agree.
It had been a tough subject. Felix felt as though Seo Jin had been coerced into what he'd done and therefore, didn't deserve harsh legal punishments. And while Hyunjin agreed that Seo Jin had been used, he still wanted him to rot in jail for ever touching his omega. But it wasn't his battle to fight and as long as Felix was healing emotionally from everything, he would be okay. He would heal too.
He felt Misook squeeze his fingers gently, pulling him from his musings. Her eyes were staring at their hands with a soft and awed expression.
“Did Yongbok give you that?” She asked softly, tapping a nail against the black ring on his finger.
Hyunjin nodded and chuckled lightly. “Yeah. I was teasing him about how tiny his hands are and stole it. He told me to keep it since he had another one.” He smiled, remembering how special that had made him feel.
Misook giggled and shook her head fondly. Slowly, she peeled her eyes off the ring, lifting them to look at Hyunjin. Her eyes were so soft. So loving. “That was his father's ring.”
Hyunjin froze.
Everything froze. His heart, his blood, his thoughts, the world. Everything.
“What?” His voice came out as a croak.
He didn't know much about Felix’s father. Only that he'd died when Felix was young and he didn't remember him very well. Other than that, Felix never really spoke of him. It was just a topic that never came up and no one ever asked about.
And Hyunjin had been wearing his ring for almost a year now.
Misook nodded. “And I assume the one he's currently wearing is my old ring.”
Hyunjin knew his eyes were impossibly wide but how could they not be?
“Yongbok’s dad was an omega.” Misook said, her voice taking on a wispy quality, as if recounting a dream. “He was kind and loud and caring. And we were fated. Just like you and Yongbokie.”
They'd been fated? She'd been living without her mate for this long? How? His grandparents had died one after the other. That was typically how it worked with fated mates. It was like the mind, body and spirit recognized when the world no longer held their beloved and left to go find them.
Suddenly, Misooks tiredness, her slow steps and sleepy eyes made so much sense. Half of her heart was gone. She was functioning on sheer willpower alone. Of course she'd be exhausted.
Hyunjin's head was spinning as Misook’s small hands started to twirl the ring around and around his finger.
“I've always worried about Yongbok. He may act like he's all piss and vinegar, but he's a sweet boy.” She smiled fondly. “He's very emotional, even for an omega. When he loves, there is no halfway. And after Seungwoo died, I was terrified that I wouldn't be able to guide Yongbok the way he needed.”
She finally looked up, still twisting the ring on his finger. “Being an omega is hard. There are a lot of prejudices. And there are a lot of dangers they face that betas and alphas just don't have to think about.”
“Like heats and sub drops.” Hyunjin supplied. When he'd first started dating Felix, he'd researched omegas endlessly online. He was terrified of being a shit boyfriend just because he was ignorant. And Misook was right. Not only did male omegas have to be wary of pregnancy during their heats, but they were also disproportionately targeted and assaulted by alphas who claimed it was just an instinctual hold over.
It had made his blood positively boil then and it still did. It always would. The fact that Felix was somehow less safe in the world simply because of a sub gender he didn't choose?
Misook squeezed his hand, drawing his attention out of the mental spiral he'd been in. “Yes, like heats and sub drops and just being generally a bit more at the mercy of their omegas.” she sighed, sounding so tired.
“When Felix went into his first heat, I was so scared. I didn't know how to help. He was so scared and confused and uncomfortable and all I could do was try to understand based on books I'd read and things Seungwoo had told me all those years earlier. It was rough.” Her voice broke. She cleared her throat and pushed forward. “But he got through it.”
“Because of you. “ Hyunjin added. She had delivered him safely through every single heat for years now. It wasn't just a fluke.
She smiled appreciatively and rolled her eyes softly. It was such a Felix-like expression. “Well…he never said it but I could tell he was missing his dad. Probably wished he'd been there for that first heat to help and empathize in a way I just can't.”
Finally, a true smile, small but warm, blossomed on her face as she lifted Hyunjin's hand up between them. The ring glinted softly in the dim light. “So I gave him these rings. They'd been a gift from Seungwoo when we were in college. We didn't have a lot of money so he bought these and said someday he'd get me a nicer ring when he officially asked me to marry him.” Her eyes were dewy, seeing the scene as if it had just happened.
“And did he?” Hyunjin asked, just wanting to make her smile and keep the tears at bay.
It worked. She laughed. “It was entirely too much,” she said, motioning to the beautiful gold ring she still wore. “But yes. He did.”
Hyunjin took her hand gently, observing the beautiful ring. The rock was fucking huge, that was true. But it was a simple, timeless design. “It suits you.” He said, looking up to smile at her.
The softest blush erupted on her face as she swatted the air dismissively.
But there was something Hyunjin had to know. “Is it…is it okay with you that I'm wearing this ring?”
Misooks face was so loving as she reached a hand up to cup the side of Hyunjin's face. “My Seungwoo isn't here to wear it anymore.” She whispered. “But you are.”
Hyunjin felt his own eyes welling up. God dammit, these fucking Lees were too nice, too sweet. His heart couldn't take it. He wanted to protect them all.
“I know my son. He didn't give that to you lightly. He knew exactly what he was doing.”
Hyunjin swallowed around the lump in his throat, feeling it melting into something warm. He loved him so fucking much. He felt the tugging need in his chest to be by his omega. To hold him, to cherish him, to love him. That sweet man had given him his father's ring without any hesitation. He had trusted Hyunjin implicitly with it.
Perhaps sensing this, Misook stood slowly, stretching her arms up over her head. “I apologize but I think I'll need to go to bed now. Tell Yongbokie I'll see him in the morning.”
Hyunjin stood on legs that felt shaky. He lunged forward, unable to stop himself as he folded his long body over Misook, pulling her into a hug. She hugged him back, almost fiercely. “I'm so glad you're here, Hyunjin.” She said, voice soft and tired. “Felix wasn't lying when he told me he'd found a sweet alpha.”
Hyunjin released her, a little embarrassed at his emotional display. He was thankful when Misook shooed him away. He didn't have words for any of this. He was so overwhelmed.
He floated up the stairs and down the hall. He felt a gentle fuzziness creeping into his vision. He entered Felix’s room to find the omega rummaging through his suitcase on the floor. He stood up, eyes looking hopeful as he saw the alpha.
“Hyunnie, do you remember which bag I put the souvenirs in?”
But Hyunjin didn't give a shit about the souvenirs. He strode across the room, wrapping Felix in his arms and pulling his small body flush against his own. He leaned down, kissing the omega deeply.
Felix immediately went slack, his arms winding around Hyunjin's neck as he hummed happily into the kiss. No questions asked.
Hyunjin pressed harder, trying to meld their bodies into one before the need for air became overwhelming. Panting, he pulled back to look the omega in his shining eyes.
“How come you never told me this was your father's ring?” He whispered, voice softer than he ever thought it could be. He brought his hand up to show off the ring in question.
He saw the way those pretty brown eyes widened before crinkling at the corners. The blond shrugged. “You never asked.”
Hyunjin huffed out a laugh, leaning back in. “You're fucking unbelievable.”
Felix’s laugh was cut off by Hyunjin's needy kisses, one after another after another. He couldn’t stop. He needed Felix to know how in love he was. He needed his omega to feel how perfectly unsteady he made him feel sometimes. Like he was falling over and over again. Like he was living a dream he never wanted to wake up from.
He walked them back blindly until Felix was tipped back onto the bed, a lovely laugh falling from his lips as he looked up at Hyunjin. He reached out, hands grabbing for him to join.
Hyunjin crawled on top of him, making quick work of their clothes. Finally, skin to skin and under the covers, condom on, Hyunjin pushed in slowly, letting the squirming omega adjust.
“Mmm, Hyunnie,” Felix moaned softly, being careful not to alert the whole house to what they were doing. “You always feel so good.”
Hyunjin hummed in response as he finally pushed all the way in. He stilled. One hand holding his weight, the other coming up to cradle Felix's face.
“I love you omega.” He said, fighting around the tears in his eyes. Tonight had been a lot. The ring, Misook’s tired, lonely eyes…it made everything feel more precious. And more fleeting.
He pulled out slowly, pushing back in, just as slowly. The pace was steady and consistent. A slowly building fire.
“I could stay like this forever,” Felix whispered, his eyes closed like he was luxuriating in the soft drag of Hyunjin.
“Same here angel,” the alpha replied. There wasn't much talking after that.
Hyunjin still didn't have words. So instead, he showered Felix with kisses, biting down on his claiming mark. He ran his fingers through the soft blond hair and inhaled the sweet scent pouring off of him in waves.
It was slow and unbearably sweet. But Hyunjin couldn't shake the feeling that he and Felix were never ending.
They came, one after another, panting heavily as Hyunjin peeled his body up off the small omega who immediately just curled into his side.
They lay in silence, catching their breath.
After several minutes, Felix sighed lightly, the breath fanning over Hyunjin's chest. “I guess my mom told you about the ring?”
Hyunjin nodded.
Felix nodded in return. He felt how his soft hair dragged over his chest.
Hyunjin whispered into the darkness of the room. “I didn't know your parents were fated.”
“Yeah. They were.” Felix said, his voice sounding wistful and sad.
Hyunjin just pulled him closer, letting the silence blanket them.
It took a few moments but Felix eventually sighed, deeper this time. “I know she misses him.” He whispered. “She didn't used to be so tired all the time. I don't remember him too well but…I remember he always cuddled me. And he used to always put me on his knee and read to me. I remember he put me on his feet and we would dance in the kitchen.” Felix took a shaky breath in. “And I remember that he loved mom so much.”
Hyunjin felt like someone had reached in and squeezed his heart. He wished he could have been there. Even though he knows he couldn't have fixed it, he could have held him. He could have kissed him and lied and said everything would be okay when shit got bad.
“And when Dad died,” Felix paused, swallowing thickly. “When he died…I was so scared that Mom was going to leave us too. She just got so quiet and so sad. All the time. I feel like I didn't hear her voice for almost a year.”
“As I got older, and started to understand more about fated mates, I started to feel guilty. Like…my mom wouldn't still be here if it weren't for me and Liz.”
“It's a good thing she's here, Lixie.” Hyunjin said softly, running a hand down his omegas back.
“I mean, for me and Liz, yeah. But what about her? Is it really good that she's still here?”
Hyunjin wanted to immediately shoot down this line of thought but…he knew what Felix was saying. If Hyunjin had to be here, on this earth without Felix…
Felix’s voice shook ever so slightly. “I really hope that whatever there is after this, they get to be together.”
He clung harder to Hyunjin and he knew that he was probably thinking the same thing. How would one survive without the other?
“What if he's already reincarnated and he's just waiting for her?”
Hyunjin ducked his head, bringing Felix’s up so they could see each other. “Do you believe in reincarnation?”
“I'll believe in whatever gives them more time.” Felix said instantly, his eyes burning with a will, like he could force it to exist if he just wanted it enough.
“They had so little.” Hyunjin agreed in a whisper. He closed the distance between them softly. Kissing those lips like they were the finest china; delicate and longing.
“Don't let go, Hyunnie.” Felix said, his voice rough and coming off as a command. “Ever. Don't ever let me go, okay?”
Hyunjin rolled Felix over, covering him from head to toe. “No matter what, I will never let you go.”