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On March 21st, 2018 at 2:28 pm Sukuna Ryoumen is officially and finally destroyed.
*
There hadn't been much to fight about. Not with so many gaping wounds lingering over from Shibuya. So much death. So much destruction. Someone had to pay, to try to atone for the red blood of the sins that had occured that night.
And who better than the cause of it all? Yuuji's lack of perfect control had to led to the slaughter of hundreds, the destruction of so much property. He must pay. Who cares about the circumstances around the lapse in control. About how he'd been force fed the fingers that let Sukana take his body.
Gojo let out a bitter laugh from where he sat alone after the so called 'higher ups' who casually had sentenced a child to die, had left. Yuuji had been through so much, had *done* so much even beyond what a adult would ever be capable of handling. And now Gojo had to tell him that he was expected to die too.
Gojo didn't know if he could do it. If he even wanted to do it. Yuuji was just a kid. He didn't deserve to die. He deserved to be his jubilant self, with all the boundless energy and awkward teenage cringe that came with. Yuuji didn't deserve to have to eat fingers and be beaten up and cursed at. He didn't deserve his fate being decided by people who hadn't even seen the battlefield, who weren't half as brave as he was.
Gojo's hands curled into fists. He should just slaughter all of these people. He could too. It wouldn't even take that much effort from him. He could kill them all and not even expend that much cursed energy.
*
Yuuji has been confined to this sealed room since the Shibuya incident had been declared mostly over. He hadn't even been allowed out for when his sensei had been unsealed (another thing that was his fault, if only he had seen what Sukana had been planning-), instead told to stay put and not cause more damage. And it's not like he could really leave, the seals reminding him of when he'd first arrived in this world.
Yuuji wasn't stupid in this regard. He knew they probably planned to finally execute him and that's not to say he couldn't blame them. He'd let Sukana massacre so many (Nanami, Nobara, so many innocent-), do so much damage. He should've been smarter. Yuuji knew Sukana was up to something, he should've predicted that he was in contact with the other disaster curses and that they were walking into a trap. He'd execute himself too if meant this never happening again.
Yuuji was broken out of his musings by the door creaking open. He braced himself. Would they try to take him by surprise? Or maybe make him lower his guard then strike? Or try to draw out Sukana to really be sure? He could still feel the curse in the back of his mind, smug with his actions even though in the end he'd been forced back into Yuuji's body.
What Yuuji did not expect was his sensei to step into the room. Gojo looked unruffled as ever, as if he hadn't been shoved into a tiny cube while the world around him quite literally burned thanks to Jogo and Sukana's fight. He was even smiling! At Yuuji! Even though it was once again his fault, Gojo had suffered so much because of him and yet he still smiled at him.
Yuuji had to look away. He couldn't take the guilt of seeing his sensei. Not like this. Not when he caused the death of one of the people his sensei had considered a friend.
"Well this is not a very warm greeting." Gojo's teasing voice made Yuuji's head snap towards him. It was teasing as usual but that wasn't right. Gojo should be cursing him, shaking him, yelling, doing something to express his anger but no. Instead he was just smiling, that same smile he always gave Yuuji. "Yuuji-kun, I'm hurt. Did you not miss your sensei? Sensei missed you."
*
"We could always send Yuuta Okkotsu. He and Rika should be able to handle Sukana while he is trapped in that boy's body." Yet another higher up suggested an executioner. So casual, as if they were simply discussing what lunch they would have that day and not how to end a person's life. "He's supposed to land in Japan any day now anyhow after we called him back." The same man continued.
Gojo wanted to scream. How could they sit and discuss who would kill a child? Yuuta would never anyhow but the fact that they thought they could manipulate him added another layer to the rage he could feel lurking under the surface. His voice was dark when he spoke. "Shouldn't Yuuji get a choice in this?" He couldn't keep the darkness out of his voice, making it clear it wasn't a suggestion.
"Let the vessel decide? Hasn't he made enough decisions? Besides he'd probably choose something he could escape. There is no way we can trust even your word Gojo Satorou." This time it was that stupid god-forsaken principal of the Kyoto school. "We must decide on a fool-proof, one chance method. Surely even you can agree Sukana must be stopped after what has happened."
*
The merry go round of life is coming to a screeching halt. Yuuji tries not to think about it. Not after his sensei, the one person who shouldn't forgive him, had. Not after Gojo had begged Yuuji not to give in, to give him more time to figure something out. Of course, his sensei couldn't resist throwing in a quip about how he was the strongest.
Yuuji is trying not to think about much as the hours tick by. He knows they want to execute him this very second probably. He knows they weren't able to convince Gojo-san to do it so they're probably looking for someone else who is strong enough to fight Sukana and Yuuji also knows there are not many people who can. It's not something that brings him relief.
He wants to be brave. Wants to pretend that the thought of dying like this doesn't scare him, that he accepts his punishment. That his grandfather isn't teeming with disappointment and his ghost isn't sitting next to Yuuji and shaking his fist. He promised the man he wouldn't die alone, would die a meaningful death but there was no one around him. Yuuji struggled to see the meaning in being alone.
He thought he found a way. To make his life lovely, to make it a *life*. Yuuji really thought he could keep living, even after signing his death warrant for a boy with incredibly sad eyes. Megumi. God, what a nightmare. Yuuji's eyes closed just thinking about his best friend. How could he not see Sukana's sick obsession with him? How could he allow his friend to go through so much horror? Could he even call himself a friend after all that? Yuuji didn't think so. He deserved to die for that alone.
*
In the end they let Yuuji choose. They bring in a boy with wide, soft eyes and a sword. The cursed energy radiating from him is so strong that for a moment Yuuji is thrown back to when he first learned to sense Gojo's energy. Yuuji learns his name is Yuuta and he's the third year he'd been meant to meet at the school exchange, a lifetime ago.
Yuuta is..nice. Not at all what Yuuji thought when he heard of the older man's feats. He doesn't talk much but that's okay with Yuuji because really what can you say to a person you're supposed to kill? And talking about the weather is kind of impossible in this windowless room they're both in, though Yuuji does tentatively broach it as a topic when the silence has stretched on too long.
When they both can no longer avoid it, Yuuji talks about it first. "Are you here to kill me?" And the words come out surprisingly steady, like he's not afraid and counting down every second, like the cadence of suffering hasn't reached its peak. Like he isn't in pieces.
Yuuta's voice is hesitant when he speaks, like it's something being dragged out of him when he should be leaping at the chance. Should be holding the sharp edge of his blade against Yuuji's neck in a mockery of kiss but instead he's left it in its sheath. "Do you want me to, Yuuji Itadori? To be honest, after I heard what happened with Inumake and his arm, I was prepared too. But you're just a kid."
As if being a kid let's you escape the ceaseless horrors in the real world, let alone the jujutsu one. As if childish innocence and purity keeps the darkness from finding it, moth to flame and all that other bullshit imagery prose stuff that Megumi tried to help Yuuji understand in his English textbook. As if Yuuji can take his age and wager it against death and come out the victor of something decided from the moment a curse had made its home in his mother. Or was his mother always Kenjaku? Yuuji's getting that mixed up again.
He shakes his head to clear those thoughts. "But Sukana isn't." Again, Yuuji's voice is a lot more clear and steady than he feels, even though acknowledging the curse make his insides feel like shattered glass scraping at tender flesh. "And to them, I'm as good as being Sukana himself." He manages to continue.
Yuuta hums in a way that is startingly Gojo-like that Yuuji almost expects to see unnervingly blue eyes when he looks at the man again. But all he sees is the tired look that probably mirrors his own. When Yuuta speaks again, his voice has softened. "Yuuji. To me, you are not Sukana. You are Yuuji Itadori. The higher ups want me to raise my blade against Sukana yes, but you are not Sukana. And I believe you won't let him come out. So tell me, do you want me to kill you?"
"You sound just like Gojo sensei." Yuuji thinks he manages to reply but it's probably absent minded. There was no killing Sukana without killing Itadori. If there was Gojo would've told him. His sensei was kind like that, always trying to help something that shouldn't have existed in the first place. Trying to protect when it was everyone else who needed protection.
*
Megumi Fushiguro's best friend is a dying man.
Come on now, the story is almost over. Because that is what this has to be. A story. Fiction. Something dreamed up from the recesses of his mind to cope with everything that happened in Shibuya. Because there is no way someone like Yuuji, someone who brims and overflows with light and life can ever really die. That's like the sun being snuffed out instead of causing the heat death of the universe.
They can't take Yuuji away from Megumi. Not again, he won't survive it twice and the first time had barely been his fault. Megumi remembers reading about how love was the fountain of life. If that was really the case then Yuuji couldn't die. Not when he was full of so much love, so much life that it overflowed into everyone he interacted with. Yuuji took everyone's soft edges and instead of trying to shave off the corners to make them round, filled the empty spaces inside everyone he came into contact with warmth. So how was a person like that supposed to die? How was Megumi expected to let Yuuji slip through his fingers and ever be the same?
*
Gojo puts his fist through a wall, though he barely feels the sting of pain it should bring. He'd failed to convince Yuuji to run with him. Or to kill the higher ups. Instead Yuuji had reminded Gojo of his earlier words about how they'd just be replaced. As if that mattered to Gojo right now.
At least Yuuji agreed to be moved out of that god awful room. Instead, Yyuji was back where Gojo felt it all started. His basement. Their basement is how Gojo had secretly referred to it, remembering many a nights spent thigh to thigh with Yuuji, throwing popcorn at the TV and lowering Infinity enough to feel the elbow Gojo would get when he spoiled yet another ending. The same basement where nights spent with Yuuji had started to fill the space in his heart that Gojo thought he had carved out after Suguru.
That's just who Yuuji was and not just to Gojo. The kid had an uncanny precision of finding the emptiness in someone and filling it up with everything good and soft. Yuuji was a horribly straightforward person who poured love into everyone regardless of whether they wanted it or not, who brightened lives with sunshine smiles and sweet eyes. And after everything Yuuji had done for others the only thing Gojo could do for Yuuji was kill him? It just didn't seem like fair trade off.
*
Yuuji wants to dance even as he is dying. He doesn't want to know when it will happen. After Gojo had failed to convince him, he'd asked. How do you ask someone who is barely grasping adulthood with tiny fragile hands how they'd like their string to be cut? It's nothing one should ask. It's nothing one should have an answer too. But Itadori does.
He wants to watch movies. Studio Ghibli preferably. He wants to dance with his Sensei because he's never danced before. He doesn't want to know when it will happen. He trusts Gojo to do it when he's ready. He wants to eat a shitton of snacks and he doesn't think he can say goodbye to anyone else so he just wants it to be the two of them. Yuuji wants Gojo to apologize to the others for him. He wants Gojo to give everyone the letters he wrote. He believes Satoru will know where to find them.
What is a heart if not an abyss? Satoru would really like to know that. Yuuji trusts him to kill him. So Gojo shoves his own bleeding heart and gets to work. He transform his basement by getting rid of the coffee table, installs a bigger tv and buys so many blankets and snacks that the poor cashier asks if everything is okay with him. He pays for high definition quality discs of every Studio Ghibli movie he can get his hands on. He finds Yuuji’s favorite songs and downloads them. Gojo wants this to be good for Yuuji at the end.
They start with Howl’s Moving Castle. It’s Yuuji’s favorite Studio Ghibli movie so it seems right. The way Yuuji’s eyes go round with wonder cause Gojo to snap a photo. He’ll keep these memories in the same place he keeps Suguru’s. Why does everyone leave him so young? Is this what growing up is? Leaving the same thing behind over and over, to sparkle forever in his memories but never in his hands. Gojo shakes those thoughts away and focuses on Yuuji while he still has him. Watches Yuuji look at a movie he seen a hundred times with the same sparkle of innocence as if it’s the first time.
*
“There is a place full of wonder,” Gojo whispers as he sways with Yuuji, “where the sky meets the sea. They say the Vikings called it the edge of the world. I guess if this place existed, the sight would have been breathtaking.” Yuuji’s feet are balanced on his after the boy had gotten embarrassed over his missteps. Satoru turns them before continuing. “Away from the whole world, when the sun would go down, the stars would light up the sky brighter and even the moon would seem bigger. And if I could go to this place filled with wonder, I’d take you with me to show you all the beauty the universe has to give for only your eyes to see.”
“Clearly whoever wrote that was talking about you, Yuuji.” Gojo manages to continue. Yuuji had been pretty quiet after Satoru had asked him to dance, though the flush on his cheeks showed he was still listening. “You know, after Suguru, I stopped believing in good things. But there is good in this world and I found so much of it in you. I have done bad things. I can’t take them back and they are a part of who I am. But if there is one good thing-“ Gojo can’t hide the crack in his voice. “-if there is one good thing I did, it was saving you, Yuuji. You were like the first rays of sunshine after a long, dark winter.” Gojo spins them carefully, making sure to balance Yuuji’s weight.
Still, he doesn’t want to make this too awkward, so he lets Yuuji sit after the song goes off. To his credit, Yuuji is beaming at him. Gojo sits beside him presses play on whatever movie Yuuji had decided to play. It’s why he is so surprised when Yuuji starts to speak. “Sensei thank you.” Those simple words make Gojo’s heart break more but he shoves the shards down to smile. “Don’t thank Sensei for this.” Is all Satoru is able to manage.
Gojo lets Yuuji get back to watching his movies, though the teenager looks more like he is fighting off sleep. Still, he seems to be having fun, if the laughing and shoveling of snacks is any indication. For a moment Satoru wants to pretend it’s just another movie marathon, that he kept Yuuji safe. But that’s never how anything goes, is it? Not in the jujutsu world. Perhaps Yaga had been right all those years ago. No one goes without regrets in this world. Gojo knows this will be one of his. He also knows he can’t keep putting the end off.
It barely takes anything for it to be over. A crossing of the fingers, a closing of the eyes. And then it really is all over.
*
Gojo tosses the three vials on Ieri’s desk. “Thanks again.” His voice is tired. He is tired. He lays down in the ratty couch. He is unsurprised to hear the clack of heels before Gojo’s head is lifted and placed on the soft fabric of Shoko’s skirt. He appreciates the gesture at least. He can’t bring himself to talk but as usual, Shoko doesn’t press him.
“They worked as you said they were. I don’t think he felt anything.” The bitterness lacing his voice is only broken by Ieiri’s humming. “He looked happy. He was smiling. Th-there wasn’t anything left.” The words tumble out of Satoru’s mouth as if made of glass. Sharp and hurting. “Isn’t that awful? How..everything can be..just gone. Nothing left to even bury.” Gojo thinks those are tears dampening his blindfold but he can’t be sure. Can he even still cry?
He turns and buries his face in his remaining friend’s stomach and his last words are muffled. “How many times can the same thing break your heart?” When Shoko answers, he really does start crying.
“As long as you love it, Satoru. As long as you love it.”
*
On March 21st, 2018 at 2:28 pm, Itadori Yuuji is executed by one Gojo Satoru.
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On March 21st, 2018 at 2:31 pm, Kugisaki Nobara officially wakes from her coma.
