Chapter Text
Shallan pored over the pages of her newly acquired books. That damned bookseller had taken her time, but at least she’d been true to her word about a steep discount. Still, Shallan’s sphere pouch was still lighter than she would have liked, as evidenced by the multicolored, patchy, light that illuminated her newly rented alcove in the Palaneum.
Biting the tip of her pen, Shallan peeked around the corner to stare at Jasnah’s alcove. Looking as impeccably beautiful as ever, the Alethi princess focused intently on her studies. Shallan scooted further into her own alcove. Sitting so close to Jasnah allowed her to keep an eye on the woman, but it had the unexpected side effect of making Shallan feel extraordinarily nervous.
The last two times they’d spoken Jasnah had been harsh and dismissive. Even as she offered Shallan a chance to mend the gaps in her field of study the gesture felt cold. Now is not the time to be intimidated, you need to focus on impressing her, not cowering. She’s only human, she’s not perfect either. Shallan leaned out over the edge of her alcove again, staring in hopes of finding some imperfection, some crack in the armor of Jasnah Kholin. Something to give her a foothold in the impossible task of finding a way to measure up to this woman.
No, not in her full, ruby-red lips. Not in her perfectly combed hair. Not in her flawless bone structure or her vibrant eyes. Certainly not in her figure either, with those perfect, round breasts- Shallan snapped into consciousness with a start. Fantasizing about Jasnah was the opposite of what she needed to be doing right now, but her time with the merchant's wife was too fresh in her memory. Shallan licked her lips, she’d washed thoroughly before coming to the Palaneum, but she swore she could still taste hints of that storming woman.
Shallan retreated further into her alcove, pressing her head to the desk in frustration. Why did everything have to come back to sex? Was that just how the real world worked? Sexual intimacy had been so foreign to her even a few weeks ago, but ever since leaving her home, she’d been cast into a wild and wet world beyond her comprehension. Would she spend the rest of her life a prisoner to the perverted whims of those around her? Had she so quickly become a person only able to advance in life if she could find a gatekeeper to fuck? How could she get free from this nightmare?
Or… was it something else she needed to be free of? Another thought popped into Shallan’s mind. If it weren’t for her willingness to adapt, would her journey have ended the very moment it began? Payment to the sailors, to the porter, maybe not those guards, but certainly the merchant’s wife, nearly every time she had used her body for something it had been an essential step in her journey. Perhaps the way forward was to cast off her shame, what did it matter the steps she chose to climb so long as she ended up at the top? If all of her success had come from sex, then who was she to break the trend?
Suddenly, Shallan thought back to her previous encounters with Jasnah. Faced with an authority figure she had cowered, retreating into the timid girl who didn’t know left from right outside her father’s mansion. That wasn’t who she was anymore, that wasn’t who she had to be. Maybe the reason she had failed to convince Jasnah to accept her as a ward was not because of a lack of education, but a lack of confidence. Looking back at her successes and her failures there was a clear trend. If she were to pretend to be a scholar shouldn’t she follow the data she observed? Based on that logic the reason Jasnah had rejected her was because Shallan had failed to seduce the woman.
Now it all made sense, now it was all clear. Shallan sunk further into her alcove, hiding herself from any prying eyes. She had to humanize Jasnah, and figure out what made the woman tick. If Shallan could make Jasnah feel an emotional connection, an attraction, to her then everything would be easier, getting her approval, gaining her trust, even stealing her soulcaster. Her heart racing, Shallan undid the top button on her Havah, letting the fabric part around her neckline.
She could imagine it now, Jasnah’s stern features softening as she caressed Shallan’s chin lustfully. Her harsh exterior slipping away when she saw Shallan’s true talent as a ward, nestled between her legs as the princess studied. Shallan found herself breathing faster, her freehand slowly making its way to her core, the accompanying warmth of her pleasure spreading gave life to her fantasies. She could be greedier with her imagination. Jasnah drenched in sweat, her voice cracking, her legs quaking as Shallan showed her what she’d been missing as an unmarried woman. But why stop there? Shallan imagined what the view would be like as she held Jasnah’s head between her legs, just as the shopkeeper had done to her. What would those beautiful violet eyes look like staring up at Shallan through her bush? How would the scholarly community react when a girl from the Veden countryside tamed the heretic princess?
“I’m never going to be rid of you, am I?” A soft feminine voice asked.
Shallan jumped up, thrown violently from her delusions of grandeur by the appearance of the subject of her fantasy. Jasnah Kholin stood in the doorway to the alcove, looking skeptically at her from across the table. Shallan blushed a vibrant red, hoping the piles of books on the table stopped the older woman from seeing her practically masturbating in the library.
Who was she kidding? There was no chance. As Jasnah had a chair brought into the room and began to speak, Shallan's eyes practically glazed over. Even as she answered Jasnah’s questions about her selection of books she found herself losing hope. Her last ploy had failed. Faced with the real deal, Shallan realized she had no hope of impressing this woman, let alone seducing or tricking her. Even looking as tired as she did, Jasnah had an air of dignity about her that Shallan could never hope to challenge.
As Jasnah laid out the contents of her satchel, Shallan couldn’t deny the irony of the princess inspecting a sketch of herself. Unsurprisingly, Shallan’s depiction of Jasnah paled in the face of the genuine article.
Then Jasnah stood gracefully, “I have rooms in the conclave granted to me by the king, gather your things and go there. You look exhausted.” She said.
“Brightness?” Shallan asked, rising, a thrill of excitement running through her. She could hardly believe her ears as Jasnah explained her change of mind, citing Shallan’s pursuit of scholarship on her own time as a primary motivator.
“If I cannot get rid of you I may as well make use of you. Go and sleep. Tomorrow we will begin early, and you will divide your time between your education and helping me with my studies.” Jasnah said as she glided toward the door.
“Understood!” Shallan exclaimed, unable to keep her excitement from her voice as she addressed the retreating figure.
“Oh, and girl,” Jasnah said, pausing in the doorway. “Do up your top button. I won't have a ward lacking self-respect.”