Archive of Our Own

Steve knows he shouldn't stare. But his eyes are glued to the tall figure on the other side of the hall, spellbound and unable to look away. He's entranced by the way long, dark hair spills over toned shoulders, covering the image of a demon's face at the back of a grey sleeveless shirt. How the chains beneath the studded leather belt dangle from the side of the hip with every movement. How the rings reflect the unnaturally bright hallway light, accentuating those big, strong hands and long fingers with painted nails, black like the images adorning the light skin on his arms.

His mean eyes darken when he turns and finds Steve's gaze. They are full of disgust and he's not even trying to hide the disapproval for what he sees. The way he scrunches up his nose reminds him of a snarling animal, a warning sign to not dare to come any closer. Defiant, aware, fearless.

Steve knows he should turn away, should duck his head, maybe leave all together to not rile him up even more.

But he can't.

Not after last night. Not after his life got turned upside down so viciously.

He needs to know what it's like.

The only question is - how?

The party is like any other party. The house is crowded with young adults, the music is loud and the booze is flowing in a steady stream down greedy throats that try to drown out their life’s worries, unsuccessfully pretending to be someone else for a night. Tarted up in fancy clothes and too much makeup, bathed in perfume to gild the stench of self-consciousness and self-doubt. Everyone’s dancing, cheering, having presumptuous conversations, shouting at each other to be heard over the thrumming beat coming from the boom box.

Although Steve himself had been king of house parties back in high school, he now prefers the anonymity of the clubs and bars of the city, where he can just be without having to be cautious of who might see what.

But Robin had asked him to come to this stupid party with her, literally begged him to be her emotional support buddy because she was too nervous to attend on her own. And because Steve loves his adorable dork to the moon and back, he couldn’t deny her request. They’re standing in the large kitchen of that rich girl’s house (the girl whose birthday they’re apparently celebrating) sipping on beers and chatting with some of their peers, when Robin suddenly chokes on her words and pulls frantically at Steve’s arm. He follows her wide-eyed stare down the hall where he recognizes the cause for her concern.

It’s Vicky, the girl Robin’s been pining for since they had first shared a class at the beginning of the year, which is like months ago. But she still hasn’t come up with the courage to ask her out, always just gazing at her from a distance and nearly losing her mind whenever they’re in the same room.

Steve would be sick of it by now if he didn’t love Robin as much as he does. He knows how awkward she gets when she gets all flustered and self-conscious. He’s sure, if given the chance, Vicky would instantly fall head over heels in love with Robin because she’s the best fucking person in the world. But Robin is stubborn and every attempt to give her a little push in the right direction is only ever met with the same two lines – “You don’t know what it’s like! You don’t understand!”

And maybe she’s right, maybe he doesn’t. Because he’s never had a lot of trouble getting a girl’s phone number or hooking up with a hot chick after a night out in town. But maybe it is just that much easier when you’re straight, like she always reminds him.

That doesn’t hinder Steve from being a bitchy best friend who can also be stubborn. So, regardless of Robin’s near panic attack, he waves at the girl in the doorway and calls her over with a bright smile plastered on his face.

When Vicky walks over, he gives Robin a little shove at the shoulder, nodding and winking at her bright red face.

    “I’m going to kill you,” Robin whispers.

    “Love you, too. Got get your girl,” Steve answers before making a turn and heading through the backdoor into the garden.

He follows the path down the yard passing more people on his way to find a quiet spot for himself when he trips over something on the ground, stumbles, and bumps ungracefully into the person in front of him.

It’s Munson.

Eddie.

Eddie Munson, his living and breathing nightmare.

The guy that has haunted him since high school. Not because he’s ever really done anything to him. It’s just…

Something about that man, about the way he stares daggers into everyone he doesn’t like, the way he makes everyone feel so small and unworthy in his presence had always been unsettling to Steve.

They’ve not once had a proper conversation. Not even when they got paired up for school projects or when Eddie could be bothered enough to show up for Sports and they ended up being on the same team. It was never much more than a few strained words just to acknowledge the other’s existence.

They don’t share any classes now and whenever they pass each other in the hallway it’s like an unspoken rule for them to just ignore each other.

There has always been this strange tension between them that Steve could never really explain.

   “Watch it!” Eddie growls out as he pushes Steve away from him.

   “Sorry, didn’t mean to-“

   “Whatever, man.” He turns back around and keeps talking to a guy standing at his side, not giving Steve another second of his time.

    Well, that went great, Steve thinks but knows better than to start anything and just keeps on walking.

He finds a spot hidden on the side of the house where he can finally be alone. The night air is still warm and comfortable even without his jacket. It’s dark here and the voices of the partying crowd in the house and out in the yard are only a faint background noise. He takes a deep breath and looks up at the pale moon and twinkling stars above. It’s nice to have a moment to himself.

He leans against the house wall and lights a cigarette, enjoying the scratchy feeling in his throat when he inhales deeply. His mind wanders back to Munson’s stupid face and his angry, burning eyes. Who does he think he is? It’s not like Steve wanted to fall into him like a baby deer on wobbly legs. Why does he always look so angry all the time? Like, Jesus, that man should really lighten up for once.

What is he even doing here? Not like, because he doesn’t belong. But- he always seems more like someone who wants to be left alone and not like the ‘go out and mingle’ type of guy.

Steve shakes his head, annoyed at himself for letting that prick take up so much space in his mind, any space at all. He shouldn’t bother about what Munson’s deal is. He doesn’t care what he’s up to, why he’s here. He doesn’t care.

From somewhere around the corner Steve hears muffled voices coming out of the shadows and he sighs thinking his quiet place will soon be occupied with others, braces himself for anyone to stumble in his direction. He can still hear noises but no one shows.

After finishing the cigarette and crushing it on the ground, he makes his way back to the house. Or he tries to. But when he rounds the corner of his little hiding spot, he catches sight of someone standing hidden in the dark with his back turned to Steve.

It’s hard to see anything other than silhouettes, really. But the silver chains hanging low on his hip give him away. Of course, it must be Eddie Munson blocking his way and isn’t that just great.

Steve thinks about turning around and just walking in the other direction but then Eddie’s low and rumbling voice followed by a gargled noise stops him dead in his tracks.

He shouldn’t care, should just turn heel, and walk the fuck away but his curiosity gets the better of him. He steps closer to the other man, careful not to make a sound as he treads lightly over the grass and then realises that Eddie isn’t alone. There’s another person kneeling on the ground before him.

And, listen, Steve really isn’t usually this stupid but for a good hot second he thinks that he somehow managed to step into a scene out of a horror movie, because he can clearly hear someone choking and the way Eddie moves just looks like-

But no, that’s obviously not what happens and it didn’t even need for Eddie’s panting and the wet noises for Steve’s brain to catch on.

Eddie is getting his dick sucked. Right there. In front of Steve. Which, good for him but-

   “Yeah, that’s it. Nice and deep. So good with your filthy mouth on my cock.”

    Ohokaaay.

He feels a hot blush creeping up his face at Eddie’s words. That should be enough to make him walk away, right? He’s not a creep. He can’t just stand there like a perv and watch two people get it on. That’s not- But something about this scenery makes it unable for him to move. It’s like his legs refuse to work with his brain.

   “Ah! Fuck yeah. Just like that. Taking me like a champ. Think I can almost feel myself in your throat, darling.”

Eddie’s fingers are splayed around the other person’s neck, hands around their throat like a tight collar while he fucks relentlessly into their face, picking up speed regardless of their whimpering and muffled whining. Pushing himself deeper and deeper, only pulling back to not let them suffocate on his dick.

It’s mean and gross and also fucking hot, oh my God what’s wrong with you?!

Steve shocks himself with his thoughts but he can’t stop staring, can’t stop wondering what it might feel like to have someone deep throat you like that. To have someone let you fuck their mouth like that. Or, even more so, what it would be like to be the one on their knees.

    FUCK!

That last thought goes straight into his dick, makes Steve hard just imagining having someone use him like that. Like a toy. Being a mindless puppet with the sole purpose to be used for someone else’s pleasure. And to have big hands like Eddie’s tightening around his neck?

The bulge in his pants is becoming a problem. He’s hard. Fucking bursting within his jeans to the point that it starts to hurt.

He needs to get out, get away. He needs to stop looking for his own sake before he does something even more perverted and wrong than what he’s already doing.

He slowly starts to walk backwards but then Eddie’s low groan startles him.

   “Oh fuck! Yeah!”

Eddie cries out when he comes and then yanks his human toy back up to his feet before pulling them into a hungry kiss not even seconds after spilling his cum down their throat. And then they part and the other person, the other man opposite Eddie opens his eyes and looks over his shoulder, staring right into Steve’s eyes. He looks all fucked-out, almost like he’s high, unsteady on his feet when he mumbles something into Eddie’s ear. And that’s all the warning Steve gets before he realises Eddie is about to turn around. So he runs, doesn’t give a fuck about how much noise he makes. He just needs to go.

He’s out of breath when he stumbles back into the house, pushing his way through the crowded space to get to the bathroom.

Once inside, he locks the door and slumps down to the floor. His head is reeling and he’s still half-hard in his jeans. How can he be still hard after all of this? His mind plays the images over and over again. The rough movements of Eddie’s hips snapping forward when he fucked himself deep into the other man’s throat. His hands on the neck while making him choke on his dick.

Steve’s hand comes up to wrap around his own throat, where he squeezes the sides with his thumb and fingers just to try. Just to feel what it could be like, if someone ever did this to him. His other hand moves over his bulge, stroking his dick through his jeans which doesn’t do shit to ease the tension. He needs more. With both hands he undoes his jeans and pulls them down along with his boxers to finally free his throbbing cock.

He doesn’t really think, just spits ins his hand and starts stroking himself in earnest while his mind creates unholy fantasies of Eddie pushing him down to his knees and fucking his face. It doesn’t take long before Steve can feel himself falling over the edge, biting into the hot skin on his arm to keep him from shouting Eddie’s name when he spurts his release all over his own hand. He pumps himself through the aftershock until it hurts, panting like he’s just been running laps.

Someone’s pounding at the door and Steve absentmindedly yells for whoever apparently desperate to use the bathroom, that he’ll be ‘out in a minute!’ while he’s washing his hands for the third time. Lather, scrub, rinse, repeat. He scrubs at his skin like he’s insane, trying to wash away the shame, the deep regret coiling in his stomach that is eating him up from the inside.

He’s never done something like that. And he’s not even drunk enough to have a sorry excuse for what he did. Steve is disgusted at himself. Doesn’t know what came over him. What possessed him to stay and watch as Eddie Munson got his dick sucked. Why it turned him on so fucking much.

His hands are bright red when he finally gives up and storms out of the bathroom, nearly knocking over the person waiting outside the door. He doesn’t care, doesn’t hear the curses spat at him from the top of the stairs. He needs to find Robin, needs to-

Steve can’t tell her, obviously. Can’t even think about what she would say if she knew. Her best friend is a fucking creep.

He finds her in the kitchen where he left her, laughing and smiling brightly at something Vicky has said. She looks so happy, so carefree and caught up in the moment with this girl she likes. It’s beautiful. It makes his heart ache.

He can’t pull her out of there, can’t ruin her night for something he did and is now having a mild panic attack over. He deserves that.

   “Hey, Robs?” He taps her shoulder when he comes up behind her.

She turns and beams at him, her eyes sparkling, the sweetest blush on her face.

    God, she’s beautiful. She deserves all the happiness in the world.

    “Steve! Where were you? Oh my God, Vicky just told me the funniest story. You have to listen to this!”

   “Yeah, uh, hey Vicky. I’d really like to hear that but maybe some other time? I’m not feeling too good, maybe had a little bit too much to drink.”

    LIER!

   “I think imma head home. But you two have a great night and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He doesn’t wait for any of them to respond, just kisses Robin on the top of her head and pulls her into a quick but firm hug before making his way outside.

The walk back to his and Robin’s apartment is long and the night air has turned cold now but he couldn’t be bothered to call a ride, needs the fresh air to clear his mind. Needs to get Eddie out of it.

It starts to rain and Steve wraps his arms around his middle trying to keep his body from shivering. It’s not even that cold and maybe it isn’t the weather at all that causes him to tremble. Tears start to fall and he tries hard to suppress the sobs fighting their way out of him.

It hits him like lightning, like someone slapped his face without warning.

Is he-?

The voyeurism is one thing to deal with. But did he really get off to the thought of having a dick shoved into his mouth? He’s never even kissed a guy before and now he is craving, fucking longing to choke one a guy’s cock? Eddie’s cock, for fuck’s sake! Eddie, who, for years he’s been trying to avoid like no one else.

This is all too much to deal with.

When he finally arrives at home he barely manages to step out of his shoes before falling face first into bed, burying his head underneath his pillow, quietly crying himself to sleep.

Students are walking in and out of classes, forming something like a human river between the two men that are still looking at each other from opposite sides of the hallway.

Steve thinks he’s going to break any second now. He is going to crumble under the heavy weight of Eddie’s dark gleaming eyes on him.

Maybe he knows. Maybe Steve wasn’t quick enough to turn and run. Maybe the other man recognized him and told Eddie who was lurking in the shadows behind him.

He’s due for his next class, probably already late but he can’t move. Feels caught within Eddie’s burning glare. There’s only a handful of people left in the hall with them when Eddie finally moves and Steve thinks he’ll be able to relax again but Eddie doesn’t walk away, he walks towards Steve, eyes never leaving his as he moves closer. Steve feels a lump forming in his throat that makes it harder to breathe and he clutches the books in his arms tight to his chest as if they could protect him like a shield.

Steve tries to walk backwards but his heels hit the wall behind him when Eddie stops, caging him with his arms braced against the wall on either side of Steve’s neck. It doesn’t help that Steve’s back is slouched against the wall, making him smaller and in return creates the illusion of Eddie towering over him, tall and omnipotent and oh fuck, he’s beautiful.

He bends both arms like doing a push-up on the wall to lean in and is so close now, Steve can smell the scent of sage and bergamot mixed with cigarette smoke on his clothes and in his hair. He can feel his body heat and his breath on his skin.

It’s intoxicating.

It’s frightening.

Steve wants to hide but he’s trapped.

   “I know it was you.” Eddie’s voice is low, vibrating through Steve’s skin and straight to his middle.

Steve whines. He fucking whines. It’s only a quiet little sound but he feels the embarrassment creeping up his face in form of a burning flush.

    Oh God, please let me die. Let the ground swallow me. Anything. I can’t handle this.

His silent prayer goes unnoticed by any higher spirit that might exist but Eddie suddenly smiles at him, vicious and cruel when he moves his face even closer, lips nearly brushing the shell of Steve’s right ear.

   “I know you were watching, sweetheart. Did it get you off? Did you cream your stupidly tight jeans when you saw me fucking that guy’s throat?”

Steve gulps, tries to talk but his tongue gets stuck because his mouth is so fucking dry right now. He’s sweating, feels too hot and a little dizzy and he thinks if his heart doesn’t slow down, he’ll die.

   “I, uh, I, I didn’t. I wanted-“ It’s all he gets out, stuttering and unable to form proper words let alone sentences.

Eddie chuckles, seemingly amused by Steve’s inability to talk and pulls back a little to look into his eyes again.

   “Better try not to get caught next time.”

And with that he pushes himself off the wall, turns around in one swift motion and walks away without looking back at the shivering mess he leaves behind.

Steve’s knees give in and with his back against the wall he slides down to the floor, gasping for air trying to fill his lungs, trying to slow the frantic beating of his heart.

    Next time.

There won’t be a next time. Steve will never recover from this. He should drop out of college and move to another country, maybe.

Eddie knows. Eddie knows and he called him out on being a fucking Peeping Tom. Steve just wants to cry, wants to throw up. He feels physically sick when he finally finds enough strength in him to stand back up and notices the familiar strain in his lower half where his cock is pulsing uncomfortably in his jeans.

Not again. This can’t be happening again.

Steve covers himself with the books in his hands and stumbles into the next bathroom he finds, smashing the stall door close with so much force it nearly bounces back and hits him in the head before he can lock it.

He’s a mess.

Not even as a young teen has he gotten hard so many times in public. Only once on a field trip where the vibration underneath the seat in the school bus taking them to their destination had felt a little too good. But he was like, what? Maybe twelve back then? He is twenty-one now. This should not keep happening.

Eddie’s voice should not have that effect on him. At all. Because Steve isn’t even into guys, right? He loves tits and pussies and big round eyes with long lashes and long hair... long wavy hair like Eddie’s. And strong arms that could easily manhandle him off the floor and into his lap, making him squirm and shake when he forces him down on his cock, stretching his hole and filling him up so good. Pounding into him relentlessly.

Tearing him open and making him cry for more.

Steve looks down at the milky white substance on his hand and on the toilet seat and feels tears running down his face. He didn’t even realise that he had taken his cock out and started jerking himself off, like he’s not in control of his own body anymore. His mind is foggy, occupied with only thoughts of Eddie fucking Munson. Of Eddie Munson fucking.

He needs help. He seriously has to talk to someone about this before it drives him insane.

Or maybe-

Maybe he just needs to get it out of his system.

Maybe he just needs to try it to finally come back to his senses. Satisfy his curiosity. The craving for this bitter taste.

Maybe the only thing that can be of help is the problem itself.

Eddie Munson.

For days Steve has been trying to get it out of his mind. He tried everything. From drowning out the noises in his head with alcohol to fucking a random girl. Hell, he even watched gay porn to see if that might gross him out but- yeah, straight is definitely not what he can call himself anymore. That ship had sailed the moment he stood and watched one man going down on another. Or maybe it had never even been in the fucking harbour for all he knows.

He still hasn’t talked to Robin about it even though he knows it would help his case of bi-panic or whatever you want to call it. But she’d want to know how he knew? How he came to the conclusion that he likes boys now. And he can’t tell her that, can he? What would he even say? “Oh well, I came hard to the images of Eddie fucking into my mouth.” Yep, nope. Not gonna happen. He has to find another way to deal with it.

And, sure, he’s not proud of himself for that but he’s kind of been stalking Eddie a little bit these past days, following him after school, always with a careful distance between them, never getting too close and always with a perfect explanation for why he’s there on his lips in case he got caught.

He found out that Eddie lives in one of the dorms on campus and that every evening he ends up going to a bar called The Exile. He has never followed him inside, just stood outside like the fucking creep he is, watching him go in. The people frequenting the bar all look like their part of Eddie’s crowd. Dudes with long hair or Mohawks, leather boots and jean vests. Girls with coloured hair and piercings in their lips and noses. Dressed in crop tops, hot pants, and fishnet stockings.

He'd stick out like a sore thumb if he ever dared to go in.

But the thing is, this feeling in his gut just keeps getting stronger with every passing day. He needs to do something before he fully loses his mind. He needs Eddie to show him what it’s like. There’s no way around it. It would be easier to just wait for him at the door to his room. But how could he explain himself? Why should Eddie invite him in and not just slam the door right into his face? The only option he has is to find the courage and step into that bar. At least he could pretend it’s only a coincidence when Eddie notices him. And then? Well, fuck, his plan doesn’t go any further than that. He’ll just have to wait and see.

On Friday night Steve throws every last bit of dignity out the window when he rummages around the apartment for something to wear that doesn’t make him stick out immediately when entering The Exile. Robin is visiting her parents for the weekend so she won’t find out what he’s up to when he takes one of her old shirts out from the back of her dresser. It’s a well-loved, once-black-now-greyish band shirt she hasn’t worn in forever. His arms are almost too bulky but it sits just right, makes him look fitter than he is. He takes one of his few black jeans, also just a tad bit too tight around his ass, and cuts a few slits into the fabric above the knee. In the bathroom he takes one of Robin’s silver chains dangling from the side of the mirror that sits close around his neck. And even dares to use on of her black eyeliners to fiddly smudge some of it to his lower lash line, like he’s seen her do so many times.

It is by far not perfect and anyone who knows him would know it’s more like a costume than an actual look but it’s the best he can do.

He’ll go to hell for using so much of Robin’s stuff and if she ever found out about it, she’d probably kill him. Not that they do not usually share everything. But if she knew he does all this to get fucking railed by a guy without even having told her, his favourite lesbian in the whole world, that he’s into guys? No, their friendship wouldn’t survive that, he’s sure. And the guilt is eating at him but- he’s also just so embarrassingly horny.

All his confidence goes to shit when he parks his car a few streets away from the venue and walk the last of the way chain-smoking cigarettes and cursing silently at the stupidity of it all. He takes another deep breath and when he’s just about to push the door to the bar open, he gets stopped by a voice coming from behind him.

   “That you, Harrington?”

Steve really shouldn’t be surprised to find Eddie walking up to him. He’s the whole goddamn reason he’s here, after all. But he didn’t think they’d cross paths before he even got in and-

    Oh God. Oh shit. Oh FUCK!

   “Y-Yeah. H-Hey, Munson.” The way his voice cracks is just perfect. Great. Wonderful even. He really did not need his nerves to betray him like that.

   “You meeting someone here?”

   “N-No. I’m just- I just wanted to try something new.”

    Goodness gracious, you’re pathetic, Steve.

   “Yeah, I can see that. Never seen you in clothes like that before.” Eddie stops next to him and lets his eyes graze over Steve’s body from head to toe before they get stuck on his face, something like mischief gleaming in his dark brown irises.

   “Fuck me, Steve. Is that eyeliner? You really went all out tonight, huh?”

It would almost sound like a compliment if not for the shit-eating grin on his face.

   “Shut up, Munson. If you’ll excuse me. I’m here to have a drink and not be talked down by you.” It takes everything out of him to say that, to not falter and break down at the way his heart keeps beating so fast it makes him dizzy.

Eddie laughs, that fucker, and before Steve can even move, he opens the door for him and bows down like the concierge of a five-star hotel. Steve can only shake his head but enters anyway trying not to wait for Eddie to follow him inside.

He’s in dire need for a drink and beer just won’t do, so he orders some Vodka and Lime before sitting down at a free table on the far end of the room.

The bar is nice, not even as dark, and ‘edgy’ as Steve has expected. Some girls are playing pool and most of the tables are occupied with groups of people having a good time. There are some people sitting at the bar chatting with the guy that’s works there, probably regulars like Eddie who, seems to have vanished right after he stepped in behind him.

Steve feels a little forlorn, sips mindlessly on his drink and tries to focus on the music coming from the speakers in every corner of the room. It’s some rock song Steve doesn’t know but it’s not even half as bad as he’d imagined. His eyes roam around the room, along the pictures hanging from the wall. Some of them photographs, some of them art and some probably posters of some bands, Steve doesn’t recognise.

   “So, you’re just gonna sit here and stare holes into the wall?”

Steve startles as a face appears on his right.

Eddie is back.

   “Or were you hoping to find someone to fuck you out back? Is that why you’re all dolled-up and pretty, huh?” Eddie doesn’t even ask, just sits down next to him. Moving his chair uncomfortably close to Steve’s.

   “What did I ever do to you to make you hate me so much?” It’s a stupid question but one he’s been meaning to ask for years now.

   “I don’t hate you, Stevie.”

   “Then why are you always trying to make me feel bad?” It leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. He didn’t come here to be pitied by a man he hardly knows.

   “Well, maybe I just love making pretty boys like you cry.”

Steve swallows hard around a lump in his throat and is too stunned to speak which is apparently exactly what Eddie intended because he just keeps going.

   “I love to make guys like you crumble and falter. I love when you don’t know where to look because you can’t hold my gaze. I love when you get all nervous and unsure of yourself because you want to dislike me but I guess we both know that’s not true, is it.”

Eddie leans closer and brushes a strand of hair out of Steve’s face and behind his ear. His hand is warm and soft and Steve doesn’t know what to say, what to think. He can’t even breathe right now.

   “I bet you liked what you saw back at the party. Made you rock hard and wet in your pants.”

As if to put emphasis on his words he slides his hand along the inside of Steve’s thigh, up and up until he cups his hardening cock through his jeans.

   “Eddie…” His voice doesn’t even sound like him, is all whiny and high pitched.

   “I know you want that, Stevie. I know it drives you crazy how much you want me.”

   “Want you,” Steve breathes out, forgets for a moment they’re in public when he almost leans in to press his lips to Eddie’s mouth.

Thank God at least his lower half is covered by the table and Eddie sitting in front of him.

   “Want to drop down to your knees and let me fuck that filthy, gorgeous mouth of yours, huh?”

   “Uh huh.”

   “Want to open wide for me and wrap your plush lips around my shiny tip?”

   “Fuck.”

   “Want me to push my fat cock down your throat and make you choke on me.”

It’s not even a question anymore. He’s stating a fact. He knows. And Steve knows. And if this goes on any longer the whole bar will know because Steve’s eyes roll to the back of his skull when Eddie gives his dick a mean squeeze and Steve has to force himself not to cry out loud.

   “God, look at you all fucked-out already and I haven’t even started yet,” Eddie laughs as he retreats his hands from under the table and uses it to make a sign to the bar tender, who seems to know what he means when he brings to shots over to them.

He lifts one of the glasses and pushes the other to Steve, waiting for him to pick it up. When he does, he clicks them together before tipping the clear liquid down in one.

   “Go on. ‘M not going to poison you, don’t worry.”

Steve tips his head back and swallows. Whatever it is, it burns in his throat and he can feel it trickling down.

   “So, here’s what we’re going to do, honey. You’re gonna go home and you will not touch yourself. And tomorrow, you’re gonna come to my dorm and I’ll give you what you want.”

   “W-What?” Steve thinks he’s misheard. Eddie wants him to what?

   “Wh- Why can’t I. I mean, what do you. God, fuck!” It’s exasperating how much he wants to say and how little his stupid brain is willing to cooperate.

Did Eddie just offer him to fuck him? And why isn’t he allowed to touch himself? Eddie can’t even control if he sticks to his rule. His rule?

    For fuck’s sake what’s gotten into Steve?

He should be grossed out by this. Should punch him for groping him like that without asking. He should spit in his face for how disgusting he is.

    Spit in his face…

He wants Eddie to spit in his mouth and make him swallow.

“I know you’re gonna be a good boy and do as you’re told. Because only good boys get to go down on their knees for me.”

Steve almost cums in his pants right here, right now.

   “A-And you’ll be there? Tomorrow?” His mouth is so dry even when he takes a sip from his glass and his voice sounds strange through the ringing in his ears making it hard to talk but he needs at least something. Anything to assure him that Eddie isn’t only playing a cruel game with him.

   “Of course, Steve. I never make promises I can’t keep. And I promised to give you what you want, didn’t I.”

Steve nods, still thinks he’s dreaming or maybe the drink was poisoned after all. It’s all too much to wrap his head around. His head is empty and he feels floaty. It’s strange and glorious and-

   “5 pm. Be on time.”

Before standing back up Eddie leans in and places a kiss to Steve’s cheek. It’s so- sweet? Just a chaste little peck to the side of his face and Steve half groans half sighs when Eddie stands up and leaves. He just can’t keep up with the other man.

    Tomorrow. 5 pm., he repeats over and over again in his head on the way from The Exile.

The fresh air helps but his dick still didn’t get the memo and is sitting painfully restrained in his pants, making it hard to sit comfortably in his car when he drives back home.

At home, he strips down and steps under the shower with the need to wash all the filth off him that feels like sticking to his skin. Like every word Eddie has said still clings to him, every fantasy he’s unravelled on the back of his mind pushes through his pores and out in the open.

He wants to wrap his fingers around his dick as the memories of what happened not even half an hour ago seems to fill him anew with a desire he can’t shake off. He's fully hard again, his dick bouncing heavy and longing from left to right as he washes his hair and tries hard not to acknowledge the indignant throbbing between his legs. He’s so hard it almost hurts.

But he cannot touch himself. He is not allowed. Eddie told him so; told him to be a good boy.

    Ugh, fuck!

Maybe if he keeps repeating Eddie’s words to himself, he’ll just come untouched. That wouldn’t be a deal breaker, would it? Steve isn’t sure and he is stubborn. He can do this.

He turns the water of the shower ice cold, nearly screams when the spray hits him.

It does help, at least.

At five minutes to five Steve is standing in front of Eddie’s dorm door, holding himself back not to knock just yet. Eddie didn’t say ‘don’t be late’, he wanted him to be on time. So Steve waits, watching the digits on his watch change as long seconds pass too slow. When the display changes from 4:59 to 5:00 he lifts his hand to knock but at the same time the door gets pulled open and a shirtless Eddie appears in his view.

   “Right on time. Knew you’d be a good boy,” Eddie coos and it almost fills Steve with pride to have gotten it right, to have waited.

   “Welcome to my humble fortress of pain and misery,” Eddie says as he leads him into his room.

It’s larger than Steve would’ve thought and through an open door on the other side of the room Steve catches a glimpse of what seems to be a small ensuite bathroom.

   “I’m friends with the Dean’s daughter. She put up a good word for me to get this,” Eddie grins when he answers Steve’s unasked question of how he managed to get a room like this.

The room is spacious and neat. There’s a desk next to a single bed, a dresser and even a small two-seater on the opposite wall. The blinds are drawn close and a floor lamp in the corner illuminates the room in warm golden light adding to the overall welcoming atmosphere of the room.

Eddie tells him to sit down and offers him a can of coke before taking a seat on the sofa next to him. It almost feels like they’re friend hanging out and Steve nearly forgets why he’s here. The reason for his visit, for why he couldn’t turn his damn mind off last night.

He lay awake way into the early morning hours, until his body finally gave in and he fell asleep. And when he woke up again, he wandered through his apartment like a ghost, not knowing what to do with himself. Too anxious, too nervous, too caught up in his own mind to fully function.

And now he’s here and Eddie is sitting next to him totally unfazed. He is all smiles and casual conversations as if he doesn’t know what it does to Steve. He doesn’t know how to sit, how to behave, how to be around Eddie.

    Only good boys get to go down on their knees for me.

Steve wants to be good. He’s trying really hard to sit still, not to squirm around too much despite the unsettling anticipation of what will happen. His nerves are all over the place and the only thing grounding him is his tight clutch around the can in his hands.

Eddie is rambling, talking about something Steve can’t get himself to pay attention to when his eyes wander over Eddie’s half-naked body, lingering on the tattoos on his chest and arms. He lets his gaze trail down to the dark thin line of hair leading from his navel down into the waistband of his shorts.

Eddie’s body is beautiful. Lean but strong, pale skin decorated with dark images; dark in colour and theme.

Blue veins are visible through the skin on his hands and there’s a ring on each finger, a silver contrast to his black nail polish.

He’s nothing like anything, anyone Steve has ever found attractive and yet, no one has ever made him feel things like Eddie does. It’s like he’s from another dimension; a beautiful creature from another planet sent to earth to rattle at every single one of Steve’s believes. Come to destroy him down to his innermost core and rebuild him from his shattered pieces. Make something new and shiny out of him. A good boy, worthy of Eddie’s grace.

   “You done staring, honey?”

Steve didn’t even realise that Eddie had stopped talking.

   “Sorry.”

    Shit.

Steve bows his head down and fiddles with a loose string on his shirt. He thinks Eddie will be mad at him for not paying attention. Maybe he’ll blow the whole thing off and ask Steve to leave. All because he couldn’t keep his head straight and focus.

   “A little impatient, are we?”

A soft chuckle leaves Eddie’s mouth and then he takes hold of Steve’s chin and tilts his head back up.

   “You’re allowed to look at me, Stevie.”

Steve can’t help the little whimpering noise coming out of him, isn’t quick enough to swallow it down.

   “So needy for me, huh? So greedy to have your mouth stuffed. Poor baby.”

On the last word he presses his lips to Steve’s so delicate and soft it almost feels like they’re lovers. Like this isn’t going to hurt Steve.

Eddie takes his time, nibbles gently on Steve’s bottom lip, and keeps kissing him for minutes or maybe hours; Steve couldn’t tell. He’s already too lost in the sensation of being so close to Eddie. To feel his plush lips against is own. And then Eddie’s hand comes up to his jaw, thumb and finger digging into the sides, forcing him to open his mouth before he feels Eddie’s tongue licking inside. Steve is eager to meet him with his own, ready to show him how good he can be with his mouth.

Eddie moans, a deep rumbling sound that hits Steve like a shockwave.

   “Hmm. Need to make sure your mouth is all ready for my cock. Need it warm and wet.”

He still has Steve’s face in the same grip as before, forcing his mouth to stay open.

   “Out,” is all he says and for some unknown reason, Steve understands.

He lets his tongue hang over his bottom lip and waits, impatiently, whining and when it happens, Steve nearly chokes on his own desperate voice. Eddie’s spit hits the back of his tongue and it’s gross and unfamiliar but it makes his cock twitch violently within his pants.

   “Good boy. Now swallow.”

Steve does and the mere thought of having another man’s spit in his mouth nearly takes him out cold.

Without being asked to, Steve opens his mouth again, showing Eddie his tongue again as proof that he did what Eddie demanded of him.

   “Such good manners. My, my, Steve. I’m impressed.”

He runs his fingers through Steve’s hair like stroking a puppy for doing good at following a command. It makes Steve’s face heat up, painting his cheeks bright pink. But then Eddie grabs a handful of hair on the nape of his neck and pulls hard enough to make Steve jolt and throw his head back to ease the stinging pain.

   “Eddie, please.”

Another high-pitched whine forces itself out through Steve’s parted lips and when Eddie loosens his grip and Steve can tilt his head back down, he is met with a devilish grin on Eddie’s face. His pupils are blown wide, deep dark and fucking dangerous.

Eddie stands up and wordlessly holds his hand out for Steve to take. He pulls him up so they’re standing across each other, so close their toes are touching. Steve shivers when the other man tucks at the hem of his shirt and pulls up over his head and arms so he’s left bare chested just like him. Steve is a little self-conscious for a moment, unsure of how Eddie will react to see the trimmed but thick patch of hair on his chest. But as it seems, Eddie doesn’t mind a good amount of body hair because he digs his finger right in and pulls, makes it sting just on the brink of too much before he buries his face in it. He nuzzles Steve’s chest, licks through the soft curls with a content hum on his lips and then he fucking bites him. Teeth pulling at his hair before his mouth wanders to one of his nipples and does the same there, rolling this sensible part of his body between his teeth. Steve moans and twitches, accidentally pulling back which just makes Eddie bite down even harder.

   “Ah! Fuck! Eddie, please!”

   “Can’t help it. You taste delicious.” Eddie grin is vicious and mean, sending a cold shiver down Steve’s spine. (No, he did not just hope for Eddie not to be into cannibalism.)

   “I thought I’m here to get a taste of you.” Steve feels bold, knows he’ll regret it.

Eddie stops the teasing and takes a few steps back, leaving Steve standing there cold and already missing the closeness of Eddie’s body against his own.

   “Down with your pants. Do it slowly. I think I deserve a show, don’t you?” He cocks his head to the side, looking almost innocently at Steve.

Steve nods, takes a deep grounding breath, and starts to unbutton his jeans and pulling down the zipper with trembling fingers, hooking his thumbs into the waistband and with a little shake of his ass, slides them down slow and steady until they pool around his ankles and he steps out of them. He isn’t sure if Eddie meant all of it or just his jeans, so he waits patiently for any further instructions.

   “So good. So perfect. God, Steve, I could eat you alive.” (Again, no. He didn’t.) “Go on, now the rest of it. Want to see what I’m dealing with later.”

    Later.

Steve shivers at the thought of there being a ‘later’. They haven’t even gotten to the part they’d agreed on.

Steve undresses, feels overwhelmingly vulnerable when he’s standing completely naked in front of Eddie who still has his shorts hanging low on his hip and scans his body with hungry eyes, stopping and staring at his hard cock.

   “On your knees, baby. Hands on your thighs.”

Steve almost drops down before Eddie has even finished speaking, causing the other man to laugh at his eagerness. It’s not that Steve is generally an impatient person, he is just- he wants this. He wants Eddie to use him like he did to that unnamed face back at the party.

He needs it.

Eddie steps closer and stops when his middle is in line with Steve’s face, nose almost touching the big bulge underneath a thin layer of cloth. He pulls his shorts down, revealing a thick patch of curls and then his huge cock slaps right into Steve’s face, hits him on his lips and nose and Steve whimpers in shock, fighting not to lose his balance.

His hands stay rested on his thighs just like Eddie asked him to although the urge to take a hold of his own weeping cock burns inside him like a raging forest fire.

Eddie takes himself in his hand and brushes his cock over Steve’s lips like lipstick. Steve wants to know what it tastes like but he doesn’t dare to open his mouth. Not yet. Not until Eddie tells him to.

   “Such a pretty mouth. And all for me. Guess I must be the luckiest man in the world.” Eddie singsongs the words and Steve has to force down another whine threatening to spill over his closed lips.

   “Open up for me, darling.”

It is like Eddie’s voice in completely in charge of Steve’s body. He doesn’t waste a second to open his mouth, lolling his tongue out just like before. Eddie taps it a few times before resting his dick on Steve’s tongue. The weight is heavenly, scary. He’s so big.

Steve feels his own spit drooling down his tongue and down the corners of his mouth, pooling inside all sloppy and wet, waiting for Eddie to finally put it in. And as if he can read his mind, he starts to push forward. Slowly, so fucking slowly it takes everything out of Steve not to lean in and close his lips around it.

He stays perfectly still, wants to be good, so good for Eddie. Wants to be the best boy he’s ever had.

When the tip of Eddie’s cock reaches the back of Steve’s throat causing him to cough, Eddie pulls back a little but only to give him a second to regain his composure before he pushes back in. This time, Steve is prepared for the feeling.

His jaw starts to hurt after a while and his lips twitch from being stretched out but Eddie doesn’t stop his tantalizing rhythm of pushing in and pulling back out, finding a steady pace to find pleasure in the wetness of Steve’s mouth.

It’s hard to breathe and the spit drooling from his mouth is getting harder to swallow around the intrusion. Steve trembles, panics, thinks he’s going to faint because his lungs are screaming for more air than he can get in.

   “Shhh, it’s okay. Just breathe through your nose. I know you can do it. Show me how perfect you are for me. You were born for sucking cock, Steve. Look at you drooling like a puppy. Getting your beautiful chest hair all damp with spit.”

As if to show him, he runs his fingers through it before he wipes his hand off on Steve’s face. Wiping his own spit onto his cheek. This should be gross but Steve moans around Eddie’s dick, digging his fingernails into the skin on his thighs because he feels like he’s going to explode. His dick is pulsing violently in his lap, longing to be touched.

   “That’s it. That’s my good boy. Taking me so well. I’m going to make you see stars now, baby. Gonna go in all the way. Remember to breathe through your nose. It’ll feel so good, you will see.”

And then he does. Pushes in, deeper and deeper until Steve feels himself swallowing desperately around his length when he breaches the back of his throat. And he still keeps pushing until Steve’s reflexes kick in and he’s choking, spluttering, thinking he’ll die naked and on his knees. But then Eddie pulls back out and Steve sucks in all the air he can get. He feels tears running down his face and a burning sensation in his throat but all he can think of is how he wants to have Eddie’s cock back inside him.

   “Again. Please, Eddie. Again, please.”

He’s begging. His own cock is leaking with precome and his chin is dripping with spit but he doesn’t feel disgusting or weird. He feels better and lighter than ever before.

   “Like when you beg for my cock, sweetheart. You can have everything you want when you beg like that.”

Eddie repeats the motions from before, isn’t as careful as he was when he pushes in with a hard thrust of his hips, causing Steve to choke again but this time, he finds a way to calm himself down, to breathe and not to panic so Eddie doesn’t have to pull out completely. Only enough to free his air ways for a few seconds before he dives back in, doing it over and over again.

   “Fuck, Stevie. Your mouth is perfect for me. Such a perfect little cock slut.”

Eddie growls and moans and it spurs Steve on to swallow around his cock, licking and sucking as much as the stretch allows him to move. Eddie's breath hitches and his movements become sloppier, his hips stutter and his legs start to tremble. His hand comes up to Steve’s neck and he squeezes just tight enough for Steve to feel a little dizzy the same moment Eddie spills his come down his throat.

It’s a bitter taste and there’s so much of it that Steve is unable to swallow it all. Some of it drips over his lip and onto his chest, mixing with his own spit.

Eddie lets go of him and pulls out but he doesn’t yank Steve up to his feet like he’s seen him do before. This time Eddie leans down, cups Steve's face and seals his mouth with a kiss before licking him clean. Licking over his bottom lip and his chin and then he sinks to his own knees and continues to lick long wet stripes across Steve’s chest.

Steve trembles under his touch and he’s glad Eddie is holding him upright with his arms wrapped around his shoulders or else he might just topple to the side. He feels heavy and weightless at the same time, doesn’t notice when Eddie picks him up and carries him over to his bed.

Only when he climbs on top of him and straddles his thighs does Steve open his eyes again, finding Eddie’s already staring down at him.

   “Ready for round two, baby?”

Steve doesn’t know what that means, just nods because whatever it is, he wants it. He wants Eddie to do whatever he pleases. He wants and wants and wants.

It’s like he’s been hooked on a new kind of drug and now that he’s had a taste, he needs it again and again.

Eddie scoots off Steve’s thighs, pushes his knees up so his feet are planted on the mattress and spreads Steve’s legs so he can fit right into the middle of them. Steve feels exposed with his cock slapping against his own stomach with every movement of the bed and his hole so vulnerable and out in the open between his parted legs. It makes him squirm with embarrassment and he tries to cover his face with his own arm.

Eddie won’t have it.

   “Nuh uh. You’re not hiding that precious face of yours. Want you to look at me when I spread you open.”

Again, Steve only nods, isn’t capable to do anything else but to listen to what Eddie tells him.

He watches Eddie uncap a bottle of lube and spreading a generous amount on his fingers before he feels something cold and wet on his clenching hole.

   “Uh, w-what are you-?”

    “Relax, baby. Deep breaths. You can do that.”

It’s not that Steve doesn’t want that. He’s been having wet dreams about Eddie splitting him open more than once in the past days but-

   “Does it hurt?” His voice sounds weak even to his own ears.

Eddie stills for a moment, stops the movement of his fingers circling around his entrance and leans over Steve’s body, face close to his own now. He kisses Steve’s nose and his eyelids and then he wanders to his lips, kisses him deep and passionate and so much sweeter than Steve deserves.

When he pulls away, he smiles at him.

   “It does. But only a little bit. You’ll feel so good, I promise. I’m going to open you up so good before I fuck you. Wouldn’t want to seriously hurt you. Need to make sure you stay intact, would need to look for a new toy otherwise.”

Steve isn’t sure if he’s joking or not, wouldn’t mind to be Eddie’s toy. Not just for tonight.

   “Hush, darling. Let me take care of you. Let me make you feel good.”

When Steve comes to himself, he needs a moment to understand where he is but then he feels Eddie’s steady heartbeat and his soft skin underneath him and when he tilts his head up, he finds the other man looking down at him with a softness in his eyes, he has never seen before.

   “Welcome back, Stevie.”

He presses a light kiss to the top of Steve’s hair and continues to stroke along his back where he lies cuddled up against Eddie’s chest.

His body hurts in places he’s never felt this kind of pain before and he is sure tomorrow it will be even worse. But despite the ache he feels good, relaxed. He feels different and new.

Eddie’s hands on his skin feel soothing and Steve gives in to the urge to pepper Eddie’s chest with light kisses.

He doesn’t know what this thing between them is. If it’ll be a one-time thing or if it will happen again. He doesn’t know how Eddie feels about it but he wouldn’t mind to do it again. He only got a taste of Eddie, knows there’s so many more flavours of him to try; that Eddie has so much more to show and give. Enough to have him craving for a lifetime, he’s sure.

   “Did I deserve to be down on my knees for you?”

Eddie tilts his head, chuckles, and smiles down at him.

   “You want to know if you’ve been a good boy, huh?”

   “Mhm.”

   “The best boy. Even earned your right to stay here with me and cuddle me to sleep.”

And okay, that’s not at all what Steve expected.

But he will do just that. Do as he is told. Because he’s a good boy.

The best.

For Eddie.