Chapter Text
It was the nightmare where Kamoshida broke his leg again.
He’s had it so many times now, he wasn't even surprised when he saw the familiar scenario beginning to play out. Like a twisted opening scene to a movie he’s seen a thousand times.
Of course, ever since stealing the old coach’s heart, there have been some strange variations. Sometimes he’s in school. Sometimes he’s in the castle. Sometimes Kamoshida is the coach. Sometimes he’s dressed as the king. Sometimes he’s the giant ugly demon his shadow turned into. Sometimes there are other students there. Sometimes he’s painfully alone.
The variations never change the outcome though: Ryuji writhing in pain and screaming as his bones are snapped like twigs.
The pain in the dream only seemed to get sharper and more acute the more times he had it.
It’s so intense this time around, Ryuji had the terrifying thought that somehow this nightmare, in particular, is real and his leg really is broken.
He was a blubbering mess on the floor as he clutched at his broken, useless, bloody leg. It’s never been this bad. It’s never felt this real. The damage done looks more akin to a wild animal attack than normal abuse from another human being. Ryuji was too disoriented and distressed to question why that was.
“Pathetic.” Kamoshida scowled down at him as if Ryuji was nothing but a bug to be squished under his heel. “Look at you. You’re nothing. Nothing.” He hissed like a serpent, and the venomous words certainly felt like poison to the boy’s ears.
The man’s scowl morphed into a cocky smirk as he sent a sharp kick to the boy's ribs. Ryuji cried in both surprise and pain. He usually woke up by this point. The pain in his leg was enough of a shock to wake him up. Why couldn't he wake up?
“Where’s your little friends?” Kamoshida purred with cruel amusement. His sickly yellow eyes glared down at Ryuji. “Wouldn’t they be here to save you by now?”
“Shut up!” Ryuji snapped, which earned him another swift and painful kick to the ribs.
“Don’t talk back to me, useless scum,” Kamoshida ordered and continued to kick Ryuji again, and again, and again.
Ryuji could do nothing but cover his head with bloody hands and curl up to protect his vital organs from the onslaught of kicks and punches. With every hit he took, he felt his strength draining.
“They abandoned you!” Kamoshida laughed, “Abandoned you because you were too weak! Just like the track team! Just like your father!You couldn’t keep up! You’re useless!”
“Shut the hell up!” Ryuji screamed between sobs. Why? Why couldn’t he wake up? Why was this dream turning out to be so different from the others?
He just wanted it to stop.
Ryuji pulled on a familiar power on instinct, and for a split second he felt a familiar spark, but no blue flames or comforting crackles of electricity came to protect the boy.
A pit of dread formed in Ryuji’s stomach as he cried and screamed and begged, but as the minutes dragged on and his pleas were met with nothing, Ryuji was beginning to believe he might never wake up from the nightmare.
A loud groan echoed through the hall. The sound of metal and wood being strained by a sudden great weight overpowered all other sounds in the room. Kamoshida paused, mid-kick, in his onslaught on the boy as the room violently shook. Slowly, the two turned their eyes up toward the ceiling where the sound had originated from. There was a beat of terrible silence as if the whole world around them was holding its breath.
‘drip!’
Ryuji cringed when he felt a droplet of water hit his cheek. Confused and a little hesitant, he reached a hand up to wipe it away--
The ceiling burst.
Ryuji only had a split second to register an entire ocean coming down on top of him before he was engulfed in the flood. The forceful current threw him around like a rag doll, which aggravated his leg and other injuries.
His eyes stung with salt water, but he forced them open and attempted to swim on instinct. Of course, such an act only caused a surge of white-hot pain to ravage his nervous system when he tried to move the broken leg. Ryuji opened his mouth to scream and curse, only for the seawater to rush down his throat. Bubbles flew from his mouth as his body tried to force the water from his lungs, only to achieve the opposite and welcome more of the water in.
He remembered one of his teachers explaining, during one of the rare moments he paid attention in class, that drowning was one of the most painful ways to go. Ryuji had taken a new interest in the ocean since Awakening in Kamoshida’s Palace, so he remembered listening with morbid curiosity as his teacher described the effects of water filling the lungs and how the body shut down.
This felt so much worse than what his teacher had described.
Black spots danced in his vision as the last few bubbles of his breath left his mouth. Ryuji wasn’t sure what was up or down, he wasn’t sure if he was asleep or awake, he felt everything and nothing at the same time. All he knew was the endless black waters that were suffocating him.
Ryuji closed his eyes to allow himself to be taken by the dark abyss--
And then he found himself being forcefully pulled upwards.
The moment his body hit the surface, he was yanked onto a solid wood deck and laid out like a fresh catch. Ryuji gurgled, and the water in his lungs suddenly pushed for a painful exit. The strong hand that had yanked him from the waves pushed the boy onto his side and rubbed comforting circles into his back as Ryuji proceed to get sick to his stomach. He took greedy gulps of air once his lungs emptied out and pressed his forehead against the cool wood beneath him.
Those gulps of air turned into terrified pained sobs. His whole body trembled as he allowed himself to completely break down. Ryuji officially didn’t know what was going on anymore, and the overwhelming feelings were just making him feel even more lost, and scared, and confused. What fresh hell did he get dragged into now? Was getting his leg broken and nearly drowning not enough?
The boy curled up into a ball to try to protect himself from whatever was about to happen next. He cringed away from the hand, expecting it to start causing him some kind of pain.
“Easy, lad, easy…” A voice spoke and the large hand returned to gently squeeze Ryuji’s shoulder. “Breathe, Ryuji.”
The boy found himself following the voice’s order and focusing on the wonderful feeling of air flowing through his lungs. After a few moments of nothing terrible happening, Ryuji uncurled slightly and cracked an eye open.
He was met with the sight of stormy skies above and dark rough waters below. He was on a black ship that almost seemed to slice through the waves like a bullet. There was no crew to guide her, yet the ship sailed true for some unknown destination in the endless sea. Ryuji looked over his shoulder to see a dark figure looming over him. It was huge, easily twice Ryuji’s size, maybe even slightly more so. It was hard to tell, considering the figure was hunched over and down on its knees.
Ryuji’s tearful brown eyes met familiar burning red and yellow.
“There you are…” Captain Kidd breathed a heavy sigh, a soft look in his eye. Ryuji felt tears threatening to spill over again, not out of fear, but out of relief at the sight of his Persona.
“Kidd…” His voice was so small. So horse from all the screaming and crying and drowning. Ryuji tried to push himself up, but he had no energy left within him and collapsed back onto the deck. The Captain caught his head before it could hit the hardwood.
“Easy. You’ve been put through the wringer, lad.” Kidd said softly and he gently pushed Ryuji to lie on his back.
“It hurts.” Ryuji sobbed, digging his fingernails into the wood.
“I know,” Kidd replied and used his large form and coat to protect the boy as rain started pouring from above.
“I can’t wake up.” Despite everything, he still knew this was a dream. He distinctly remembered going to bed. He’s had the Kamoshida nightmares before but this one just felt way too real. Way too different. It was freaking him out but the presence of his other self helped greatly.
“You will.” Captain Kidd carefully worked an arm under his charge and lifted the boy up with ease. “We just need to ride out the storm, lad. You’ll be okay.” Ryuji buried himself against the Captain’s chest, staining his shirt with tears. He was glad his dip in the ocean had washed off all the blood. He would feel bad for bleeding all over Kidd, but he knew the Persona wouldn’t have minded.
Ryuji cringed when lightning struck not far from the ship. Kidd didn’t react and simply carried the boy below deck.
“Where--” Ryuji coughed against the rough feeling in his throat, “Where are we?”
“My ship, the Quedagh Merchant,” Captain Kidd responded, “You tried to call for me. You cannot summon me since you’re currently asleep in the real world, so I suppose the powers that be brought your consciousness to me instead.”
“So this is… Where you go when we’re not in the Metaverse?” Ryuji looked around. It really did look to be a ghost ship, with cobwebs and splintering holes, but he could see the glimmer and shine of various riches out of the corner of his eye as they passed a few doorways.
“More or less,” Captain Kidd shrugged slightly, but not too much to disturb the boy cradled in his arms. “It’s not always like this. The seas of your soul are quite stormy tonight.”
“’m sorry…” He mumbled into Kidd’s shirt and the pirate gave him a comforting squeeze.
“Nothing to apologize for, lad. This ship can take any storm your heart can dish out and then some.” Ryuji could hear the proud smile in his Persona’s voice, “Just allow it to run its course.”
They came to the Captain’s Quarters, where Kidd laid Ryuji down on the large bed. He wasn’t a healer, but he still did his best to treat the boy’s leg and give him some comfort. When he was done, he sat on the edge of the bed and did his best to offer his charge small reassurances that everything would be fine. He would wake up tomorrow morning to that damned alarm he hated so much. He would get dressed and go to school and this nightmare would be nothing but a memory.
The ship barely rocked as it sliced through mountain-sized waves like a razor-sharp cutlass. The sound of the storm outside only seemed to grow in intensity as Ryuji’s emotions churned in his stomach.
“Do you want to talk about it?” The Captain offered as he gently carded his large clawed fingers through the boy’s hair. Ryuji leaned into the touch, enjoying the slight tingle of electricity on the Captain’s fingertips.
“Shouldn’t you already know…?” Kidd was him, after all. ‘I am thou’ and all that. Still, the pirate grinned.
“Humor an old sailor.” Kidd said with another shrug, “It might just help.”
So he did. He recounted everything Kamoshida had done to him in this dream and several dreams leading up to it. He found himself tearing up as his rant shifted to what remained of the track team. He recounted the pain of coming into contact with those former friends who left him behind. How, even though Kamoshida had a change of heart, he didn’t think he’d ever be able to forgive him for what he did. He ranted until he devolved into a series of curses and profanities.
The thunder and lightning outside grew in intensity as Ryuji’s sorrow gave way to anger. Kidd, seemingly knowing this would happen, helped the boy sit up and held him close. Ryuji took the silent invitation and pounded a fist against the Captain’s boney torso. They both knew Ryuji’s punches couldn’t hurt Kidd, even when his fists started to give off little sparks of electricity, similar to that of his Persona’s. Ryuji needed a physical outlet as well as an emotional one. Something to get all that energy out of his bones.
If the Captain wasn’t a part of him, Ryuji would have probably been embarrassed by the tantrum he wound up throwing. But this was his Persona and this was his weird soul space thing, so Ryuji concluded he could do whatever the hell he wanted if it helped him feel better about everything that was happening.
By the time he was done, he was exhausted both mentally and physically. Ryuji went from punching the Captain’s chest to cuddling against it. The feeling of the cool metal of Kidd’s canon arm against his clammy skin felt nice. Despite his Persona’s face only being a skull, Ryuji could tell he was smiling softly down at the boy.
“Done?”
Ryuji only nodded in response. The pain in his leg and torso had all but vanished. He couldn’t see outside, but he already knew the storm outside had quieted. He felt like he had just run a marathon in Mementos; all his energy was spent.
“Rest now, mo leth,” The Captain gently instructed, “The worst has passed. You’ve made it to the other side. You did very well.”
“You’ll stay?” Ryuji breathed as he felt his eyes begin to close of their own accord.
“Always.” Captain Kidd took Ryuji’s hand in his own. The human’s hand was so small compared to Kidd’s large clawed one; but despite the menacing appearance, the touch was warm, gentle, and comforting.
Ryuji allowed sleep to finally take him.
When Ryuji awoke to the blaring of his alarm the next morning, the warmth of his Persona’s hand still lingered.
It gave the boy the small childish comfort he needed to get up and get through yet another hard day of being a Phantom Thief.