Chapter Text
“This NEVER would have happened if Batman or Nightwing had been here. Oh my gosh, they’re going to kill me. Literally kill me. OK, think Drake, think!”
It is usually quite hard to think when there is a baby screaming its lungs out right by you. It is also quite hard to think when your younger brother (legally) was one moment fighting beside you and the next was a screaming red faced baby, currently drowning in their uniform.
“Ok, just pick him up right? What’s the worse he can do? He’s a baby....a tiny, evil, ninja assassin-trained baby. His hands are too small for his knives, right? I should probably check.”
Red Robin verified that the coast was clear and they were in no imminent danger before he approached the angry ball of tears. Sinking down to one knee, he reached his hand out, only slightly trembling thank you very much. Robin, although he isn’t currently wearing his uniform nor mask, screeched in earnest as he drew closer. Biting his lip, Red Robin gently cupped his hand and allowed it to rest on the small head. Robin tossed his head around, furiously attempting to throw off the heavy hand and leaned away going so far as to topple over once unbalanced.
Red Robin lunged forward and caught the child before he hit the ground, and pulled him to his chest. Little arms flailed and tried to beat against his armored chest.
“Easy Ro-Damian, easy. I got you, and while that may not be the most comforting thing to you, it is a promise. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
Damian didn’t calm down at his attempt at being soothing. His fists clamped down on Red Robin’s and he pull frantically at his glove.
“OK, ok!”
Using his teeth, Red Robin pulled off the free hand’s glove and slipped it into a pouch before he used the now bare hand to cup Damian’s head. The effect was almost instantaneous. Like a cat, the small child was butting his head against the callous hand of Red Robin. Shifting the baby into the other arm, Red Robin was quick to remove the other glove and store it with the other. Damian was still shifting in his arms but the flailing and wailing was cooling down to just soft whimpers.
“OK, you don’t like the gloves..? So maybe...” Red Robin cast his mind back to his classes he went to when Steph was pregnant. With careful movements, he adjusted his uniform to unzip the front down to his belly button, grateful that he wore his undershirt for the cool air. With small movements he he shifted Damian into the center of his chest, securing him with one hand, he unclasped his cape. It took several long minutes but he was able to fasten a sling of sorts that immobilized Damian to his chest. At last, the boy who was Robin settled contently into his new position with a soft sigh.
Red Robin froze, ‘is this really happening?’
Damian buried his head into Red Robin’s chest, a soft snuffle escaping his parted lips. Something warm swirled in Red Robin’s stomach at the sound, and his hands cupped the still form protectively.
“OK, ok. Batman and Nightwing are off-world; Alfred is in Europe, Cass is in Hong Kong....that leaves me, Damian and Red Hood. So, back to base.”
With careful movements Red Robin collected Robin’s uniform, before he grappled back to base, one hand cupping the child the whole time.
“Oracle, do you copy?”
“Go ahead Red.”
“Uh, I have a situation.”
“Status?”
“Returning to base, unharmed at least for me; as for Robin, there was an incident—“
“Stats?”
“Healthy and about.....8 months old?”
“Say again, Red; you apparently cut out.”
“Robin was de-aged——turned into a baby?”
“Is that a statement or a question.”
“Statement, although exact age is unknown.”
“.....Did Hood put you up to this?”
“Negative. This is serious.”
“Wh-what are you going to do?”
“I-I don’t know!”
“I’ll procure you some supplies in the meantime and get those over, he’s going to need to eat soon.”
“Oh my God, eat and then crap. That means diapers....He’s going to kill me,” Red Robin whispered brokenly.
Oracle’s tinny laugh in his ear was not reassuring, not in the least. Red Robin tried not to let the rising panic be reflected in his movements as he landed on the roof of his current residence. While he was disabling his security system, Oracle was reporting her deleting of any footage of the night’s events from the public view while simultaneously leaving a copy in her file in case they are needed to return Damian to his normal self.
Some of the stress of the night melted away once they were both safely ensconced in Red Robin’s base. A flick of his fingers brought his lights up to halfway point; enough so he could see but not enough to disturb the peaceful baby in his arms. Taking a few deep breaths, Red Robin started the tedious task of disrobing while trying not to jostle the content baby. It took far longer than normal to strip down to his shirt and compression shorts with only minimal protests from Damian.
“Ok, ok. Um, how about we just lay down, yeah?”
The newly disrobed Red Robin, attempted to slip the child from his current placement and down to the bed. The effect was immediate. Damian’s face screwed up at the sudden loss of comfort and warmth; it started with a furrow of brows, a quivering lip to an explosive scream.
“Ah, ah....no no no, wait, come on kid..—“
Frantically Tim Drake picked the baby back up and cradled him to his chest but it didn’t help. The little baby was letting his displeasure known in no uncertain terms. Making a decision, Tim set Damian down on the center of the bed, he pulled his shirt off; then quickly brought Damian back to his chest. He sat on the edge of the bed until he shuffled his way awkwardly to the center of the bed and lay down. One arm cradling Damian to his chest, while the other hand rubbed a slow circle on his back.
The sobs turned to sniffles, and quieted to hiccups as the baby attempted to regain his composure. Tim continued his ministrations as he whispered nonsensical words to his now literal baby brother. Within a few minutes Damian had snuggled down deep, his breathing had evened out and Tim sighed in relief. The warm weight of the baby currently resting on his chest was calming, Tim knew he should keep himself alert for dangers and for the incoming supply run but as their breaths synchronized he couldn’t withstand the pull of sleep any longer.
-.-.-.-.-.-
“Oh my gosh.”
Time felt himself resurfacing from his first real healing sleep, he could feel the heaviness of his limbs, the warmth of the child on his chest and the lazy smile on his lips. Then his brain registered another presence, most likely the one that woke him up and his brain kicked into high gear. Eyes snapping open, they immediately sought out the intruder as his hands and arms tightened reflexive around Damian who was still oblivious to the possible danger. The moment his eyes found their target, he relaxed as the cooing face of Stephanie approached.
“I have to say, I didn’t believe Babs when she radioed me in but…wow. Look at him. He is so cute! I can’t believe those words came out of my mouth but—just—wow.”
“No one is more surprised than me, Steph.”
“I guess those Lamaze classes paid off in the end, eh?”
Tim saw the moment the memories drifted across her face, the pinch of lips and eyes. The slight sheen as she rapidly blinked back tears. He reached out his hand along the bed and she meet him halfway, squeezing his hand. Her lips trembled ever so slightly but Tim knew her, and he used the thumb in their intwined hands to rub circles in the space between her thumb and index fingers. Steph found solace in Tim’s quiet strength, her emotions eases to a more bearable level.
“Do…do you think he’d let me hold him?”
“Uh,” Tim flushed as he fumbled with an answer. “He really didn’t like being held unless he is against bare flesh.”
Stephanie didn’t even hesitate, releasing Tim’s hand she pulled her t-shirt off and made grabby hands towards the sleeping child. Tim just chuckled, and motioned with his head.
“It’s easier if you are laying down. Here, I’ll scoot over and you can take my place.”
“You just wanted to get me in your bed.”
“Wow, how long have you been holding onto that one?”
“That would be telling, bird boy.”
Tim just scoffed at her as he wiggled his way from the center of the bed to allow Steph to move into the already heated spot, despite that Tim runs cooler in body tempt then most other guys. Once she was hunkered down, she held out her arms and Tim made the transfer as quickly yet gently as he could.
“He might not like the feel of your bra against his skin…”
“Nice try, Tim.”
“Just saying—“
They both froze as Damian lifted his head up, rubbing his head against her chest, snuffling. They both released a sigh as Damian snuggled back down, apparently content in Stephanie’s arms.
“Wow. This—I—.”
Tim just smiled knowingly as he rooted around for a shirt. Finding an acceptable one, he pulled it over his head and went to look at the supplies she had left on the table in the kitchen.
“Hey, is that Hood’s—?”
“‘Ask me no questions, and I shall tell you no lies’.”
Steph just sniggered at Tim’s retreating back. He ignored her as he routed around in the bag pulling out diapers, wipes, baby powder, formula, baby food, fresh soft fruits for self feeding, clothes, blanket and several other necessities.
“Ok, good news, as usual Babs had all the bases covered we have——“
Tim was walking back into his room when he saw Stephanie out of bed and holding a wiggling, giggling Damian away from her.
“He ruined the moment.”
“—How?”
“He peed on me.”
Tim sniggered at her, Damian joined in the laughter with his own high pitch giggling. Steph glowered at her former boyfriend and walked over to hand him said child.
“Wait—what?—No!”
Tim fumbled to grasp the child before Steph let go, panic now filling his eyes.
“Oh, come on! You’re the woman——“
“I would think very carefully about your next words, Nerd.”
“Uh, I just meant, that, um, you went to more of those classes than I did…so um, wouldn’t you—“
“Nope—!” Steph chirped back as she sashayed back to the common area.
Tim sighed as Damian reached out with his chubby hands and pat his elder brother’s face.
“Alright shrimp, let’s get this over with. Here’s hoping you don’t remember this and kill me in my sleep.”
Damian just babbled at him, his grin a little sharper than before.
“Ok, we should do this in the bathroom.”
Stephanie brought him the necessary supplies and stood in the doorway, a smirk on her lips as she watch him struggle.
“Kinda sad, that a genius is struggling to get a diaper on a baby.”
“This isn’t a baby, this is a baby ninja assassin; who wiggles around like a worm.”
Stephanie chuckles at his misfortune.
Ten minutes later and Stephanie finally takes pity on the clearly inept teenager. With deft hands, she has Damian all situated in less than a minute with Tim just gaping at her like a fish.
“How—?”
“I used to babysit for neighbors. I could do this in my sleep.”
There was admiration in Tim’s eyes as he watched her.
“My eyes are up here, Robbie.”
A whine broke the moment causing both sets of eyes to glance down at the current predicament.
“Uh oh,” Steph muttered.
“What do you mean, ‘uh oh?’ ”
“Someone’s hungry!” Stephanie gathered Damian up into her arms and heads out towards the kitchen. Tim took a moment to dispose of the used products before he trailed after her. She glanced at him.
“You might want to remove that shirt.”
“What, why?”
“Feeding a baby can be an….involved process.”
Tim just shrugged and grabbed some of the food off of the counter and approached Steph with it. Sliding it onto the table, he watched as she secured Damian to her lap before reaching for a bottle of baby food.
“Actually, you should be doing this.”
“What? Me, why? He looks just fine with you.”
“Yes, but I am in the middle of finals, I should be studying (despite how much I don’t want to); as I will not be here for most of the time.”
Tim cringes, but concedes her point. They switch positions and with it apparently Damian’s mood. He fussed more. Awkwardly Tim tried to do what he had seen Stephanie do but with much less success. Spoon after spoon of food barely made its way into Damian’s mouth, most of it just went down his front and ultimately into Tim’s lap. He cringed at the feeling of the mush sliding down his inner thigh.
“Maybe we should try the bananas—?”
Stephanie already had one cut into half moons which she slid onto the surface of the table. Damian seemed to have great fun sticking his hands in them and smooshing them in his hands before smashing them into his mouth. The debacle continued for half an hour and when it was done, Tim could see pieces of food everywhere within a five foot radius including his and Damian’s hair.
He heard the quiet schnik of a camera shutter and turned to see Steph grinning back at him, phone in hand.
“Your face! You look like you’ve been through some sort of war zone.”
“I—just—how? What? It shouldn’t even be possible—“
“Welcome to parenthood.”
The dazed look on Tim’s face didn’t abate.
“Ok, we’ve got to hurry, I only have enough time to go over cleaning a baby before I really need to go study.”
“You’re going to leave me alone with him—?!”
“You’ll be fine, boy wonder.”
“He’ll probably try to smother me in my sleep,” Tim muttered under his breath.
“Ok, stop. He’s just a baby—“
“—Ninja baby—“
“A baby. And you will have to take care of him. He is depending on you. Suck it up. This is a rare opportunity that you have been gifted! You get to see your baby brother when he actually is a baby; at a time where in his own life he probably didn’t get the affection a baby needs and deserves—“ Her voice chokes off, tears stream down her face.
Tim sighs, his arms still around the sleepy child as he gets to his feet. He reaches out to Steph and pulls her against him.
“I know, I’m sorry Steph. This must be really hard on you. I just, I don’t know what I am doing. I was fine before but I think, I think it’s just starting to hit me now, you know? I-I don’t know what to do with a baby, especially Damian. I-I didn’t have the best role models growing up. I just, I am overwhelmed and I was trying to lighten the mood and clearly I failed in that too.”
Damian wiggled in his arms at the weight of Steph against him with Tim on the other side, but he quieted down. Steph sniffled as she tried to reign in her emotions.
“I know Tim, I know. I’m sorry. I just—I wonder some days—“
“—if you did the right thing? Yeah, I get it. You made an incredibly brave and hard decision but you did it with their best interests at heart; especially at that time. You are so strong, never doubt that. You. Are. Strong. Much stronger than I am. I don’t know how you do it but I am grateful to have you on my side.”
“You sap.”
Tim just chuckles as he holds them both, one in each arm. His mind already starts coming up with different things he needs to address in the coming days if Damian doesn’t return to his normal age on his own. ‘God, I wish Bruce and Alfred were here. He shouldn’t have to miss his childhood for a second time.’
Eventually they separated and Stephanie showed Tim the basics of caring for a baby and left before she could change her mind, shirt intact.
Tim looked down at the now clean baby, snuffling quietly in his arms, his mind marveling again at the fact that he was now a single parent for all intents and purposes and what the heck he was supposed to do now. He returned to his bed and used his pillows to create a barrier for Damian, to ensure that he doesn’t roll off in the night while he gets his laptop powered up and starts to make his plans.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-
The next day dawned brightly, and loudly as the cries of an infant rend the air. Tim jerks awake, his mind frantically trying to ascertain why there was a baby screaming in his ear. Blearily he looks down and find a child waving its arms and legs in the air. A deep breath revealed the reason. Cursing, Tim sprang out of bed, scooped the child up and dashed for the bathroom. Kneeling down, he spread the small mat out and laid Damian down. Undoing the straps to the diaper, he nearly gagged to find a spectacular mess awaiting him. Cringing, Tim breathed in through his mouth as he tackled his first mission of the day.
Once the deed was done, he returned the now semi-content Damian to his pillow barrier so he could finish cleaning up. He double bagged the used wipes and diapers and left them in the bathroom trash since this would be a reoccurring mission. As he returned to the bedroom, he gaped in surprise to find Damian halfway across the bed and approaching the edge. With a shout and a lunged, Tim flung himself onto the bed, hands outstretched to catch him by ankle before his body disappeared off the bed. Heart beating wildly, Tim did not appreciate the enthusiastic giggle and chatter from the fearless baby. Pulling him more securely in his arms, Tim just lay there with Damian pressed against his chest, his breathing ragged.
‘He won’t have to kill me himself, my heart won’t take it.’
The chirp of his phone provided the necessary grounding to allow his hands to move towards it, albeit shakily. With a flick of his fingers he found a text from Steph to remind him to take ample photos throughout the day. Rolling on his back, he fitted Damian into his preferred position before he lifted the phone to take a selfie (his first ever if truth be told). With that done, he sent it off to Steph before he set the phone down. ‘OK, so food should be next, right?’ A quick glance at the clock had him re-think his initial thought. ‘Maybe it’s a bit too early.’ Determined not to set the baby down again without direct supervision, he first grabbed a t-shirt and pants to be prepared.
Laying the clothes on the bed, he set Damian back down in his barrier and then climbed on top, kneeling over him, using his legs to corral the kid in place while he quickly slipped his shirt on then awkwardly wiggle into his pants, one leg at a time in an effort to keep Damian from leaping off the edge again. Once done, he returned Damian to his arms and walked barefoot to his sliding glass door and went out to his patio. Meandering to his favorite lounge chair, he settled down and waited for the sun to crest over the nearby buildings. Damian wiggled in his arms, attempting to turn himself towards the light. Taking the hint, Tim allowed him to face more outwards.
It was a relatively quiet morning, the birds trilled from their perch nearby as they ruffled their feathers in the light wind. For the first time in a long time, Tim just lay there and absorbed the sights and sounds around him. After several long minutes, Tim became aware of Damian’s focus. The child had his face turned towards the sounds of the birdsong, his face rapt with awe. Moving slowly, Tim pulled himself up and moved closer to the birds. Damian’s eyes were wide with rapture, a smile on his face. Tim crept a little closer, and the birds regarded them with some interest. One stood at the edge of their nest, looking down at the duo, head tilted to the side. A trill bid them hello. Damian squealed. The bird answered back.
Tim marveled that the birds seemed to react to Damian quite well. ‘Great, he can get along with birds but not his brother.’ Swiftly Tim squashed the thought. As the morning wore on, Tim knew he’d have to face reality soon. That he couldn’t put off the plans he started preparing for the night before.
“Yo, Timbers! Timbo, where are you?”
Tim startled, causing Damian to cry out and the birds to take flight. This lead to Damian start screaming at the disruption of his game with the birds and Tim to cringe at the wailing in his ear, which in turn lead to Jason charging through the sliding door with guns held aloft. Tim stared unimpressed at Jason, who stared back at the baby currently nestled in his arm. Tim bestowed an Alfred weighted eyebrow which shocked the older brother into holstering his guns in favor of approaching the two.
“Timmy, is there something you need to tell me? Something pretty significant? Oh gods, you and Steph??”
“Really Jason, just….really?”
“Hey! Don’t blame me, I’m not the one with a baby in their arms. By the way, can you turn it off?”
“Oh, yes, sure let me just find the off switch. It’s a baby you moron.”
“Whoa, who spit in your coffee this morning?”
“You metaphorically did when you made the birds fly away!”
“Ok, let’s just stay calm, and back up. What birds, who is the kid and why do you have him?”
“The birds were entertaining him, this is Damian and I was there when this happened.”
“When you say Damian—“
“Damian, former ninja assassin baby, the blood son of Bruce Wayne, what other Damian do you know?!”
“Ok, you haven’t had coffee this morning have you? I am going to go back inside, make a gallon or two and then you’ll start from the beginning.”
Tim just muttered darkly to himself as he set about walking in random patterns, his hand rubbing the center of Damian’s back as he tried to calm him down with varying degrees of success. Nerves shot, Tim tried not plot Jason’s next death at his untimely intrusion into their formerly peaceful morning.
A steaming cup of coffee was waved enticingly below his nose before he noticed and he used one hand to reach for it, nearly forgetting about the wailing child in his arms. Luckily Jason seemed to anticipate this and made the switch with little trouble. The shock of the transfer caused Damian to cease his wailing, his tiny chest shuddering at the exertion of it all. His wide eyes stared up at Jason’s face, who made a face back at him.
“Sweet, sweet nectar of the Gods, I swear,” Tim mumbled reverently as he took his first cautious sip.
Damian reached one hand up and with the grip of a ninja baby, latched onto the white forelock and pulled. Jason yelped in surprise, one hand immediately working at getting the tiny fist to release his hair. Tim just sipped his coffee, his scowl softening with each subsequent sip.
“Ok, enough reveling, spill Tim.”
“Cliff notes, in the course of our fighting some new villain who didn’t even have the decency to monologue to us, Damian was apparently hit with some sort of de-aging spell last night. Since I was the only one there, I couldn’t just leave him. Bruce and Dick are off-world, Alfred is in Europe (as you know), so I took him home with me.”
“Why didn’t you call me?”
“I kinda freaked out and forgot—?”
“Figures. Well, I’m here now, what do you need?”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah, well the original is a terror but this is a baby. No way am I going to miss out on blackmail possibilities.”
“Ah, that sounds better.”
They just grinned at each other, ‘oh the possibilities.’
—————
A/N: Rehabilitated Sith
Originally posted: 8/20/19
This is just part 1 of this mini-series. Honestly, we haven’t even gotten to the part that triggered this story but as I am long winded and wanted to build a real relationship between them, it is a necessary evil.
Reviews fuel my muse. Let me know what you think! I hope I had their interactions somewhat believable. All mistakes are proudly my own, let me know if you find them!