Chapter Text
The whole play idea starts more as a daydream than anything else. Lexi staring at her cursor blinking on the Word document at 4AM in the morning as she ruminates over her failed attempt at finally taking action in her mostly passive life. She thinks about what she could have said or done that would have prevented the ordeal that took place at Fez’s store. And so she begins frantically writing bullet points on the different routes she could’ve taken. Some of them end in a Happily Ever After, while the others with her, or even worse, Fez dead on the linoleum floor of his store.
That’s when Lexi decides to shift her focus away from this incident to her life as a whole. How she’s always lived in Cassie’s shadow and how she’s never really been the main character in her own life. Her brain is in a creative overload, the words spilling out of her cathartically.
It’s a change from the constant shutdowns she gets from her friends and family.
Her laptop can’t tell her to “Shut up, Lexi.”
In a way it reminds her of the only other person who has listened to her in earnest and with their undivided attention, Fez.
So she tells the document all her deepest secrets. All the times she has covered for Cassie. The times she has taken care of her mother and Rue. How the whole Jacobs family gives her the creeps. She writes down the witty retorts she usually keeps in her head. Makes herself be brave and fearless.
Bundled in her sheets, Lexi does not think about publishing or sharing this story. That is until she walks in the corridor at school the next day and sees that the Drama Club is planning on putting on a production of Oklahoma.
That’s when the idea pops in her head, that her story, her life, may not be the craziest out of all her acquaintances, but it is definitely more interesting than Oklahoma! So she changes the sisters’ names to Grace and Hallie and pitches the idea to Bobbi, who agrees to help her out of the graciousness of her heart and her hatred for the previous play. Lexi feels as though for the first time in her life, she’s actually doing something cool and interesting, something worth sharing.
She tries to talk to Rue about the play, and maybe the bathroom is not the best place to bring up the subject, but Lexi just wants to share her excitement with her best friend. But when Cassie comes in asking questions, red flags rise up in Lexi’s mind, because maybe this isn’t such a good idea, maybe she shouldn’t be airing out their lives for everyone to see. But at the same time, another tinier but stronger voice speaks up, “What else will make her listen?”
Because Lexi has tried.
Lexi is not blind, she knows that something is wrong with her sister. She has tried to be nice and sweet, asking Cassie about her current problems in hopes that she will open up to her. Lexi just wants to help. She loves Cassie and seeing her suffer only brings her pain.
The thing is that Cassie keeps on shutting her out. Cursing at her with tears in her eyes or ignoring her with a crazed look on her face as she continues her manic morning routine.
Maybe this is the wake up call Cassie needs.
And so Lexi continues to write the play until Friday comes around and the auditions are finally taking place.
That’s when she meets Ethan Lewis.
She passes him quickly backstage and is surprised to see him later on when he auditions for one of the male leads. He’s talented and she’s excited to have him in her play. It’s nice to see that her hard work will be in good hands. The first audition day leaves Lexi giddy with excitement, she still hasn’t casted Grace and Hallie, but the rest of the characters have nice prospects that she can’t wait to work with.
———
The weekend they celebrate Maddy’s birthday solidifies her resolve that something needs to be done about Cassie.
The girls’ night starts out fantastic. While Lexi isn’t really part of her sister’s friend group, she still appreciates their company. They dance and talk. Or she mostly observes and listens to what is happening. The fact of the matter is that Lexi is having fun.
That is until Nate Jacobs steps into her home.
Cassie dives straight into the liquor. Putting on the flashiest bathing suit she owns before choreographing the world’s saddest dance routine with balloons and ribbons as her backup dancers. Lexi can only watch the train wreck that is her older sister, on display for Maddy and Nate to see. She thinks that is where the real problem lies.
Because Cassie’s behavior from the past weeks can easily be explained by one thing and one thing only.
Cassie is in love with Nate Jacobs.
Her over the top reaction at the New Years Eve party. The depression period that followed soon after. The phone calls filled with tears and whimpers in the bathroom. Cassie waking up at 4AM everyday and playing dress up in outfits that bordered on costumes. Her sneaking out of the house with a huge smile on her face only to come back with tears in her eyes and her lipgloss smeared all over.
Lexi closes her eyes and prays that for once she’s wrong.
Her prayers are only met with the hysterical screams of Maddy and Kate.
She glances out of the window and sees Cassie in the hot tub, puke all over her as she blabbers on apologies with tears and snot running down her face.
She turns away when her mother starts to drag Cassie’s limp body out. She feels her eyes sting with unshed tears, because this is her older sister, the one that used to put bandaids and kiss her booboos better when she got hurt. The one who taught her how to build a pillow fort where they would safely talk about all their secrets. The one who used to stand up for her when the older girls made fun of her for always having her nose stuck in her books.
Lexi wishes she could step in and do something of significance. Try to speak to Cassie out of her infatuation, but she knows it would only be in vain. Love has always been Cassie’s weakness.
So she says goodbye to the girls and Nate before joining her mother upstairs to clean Cassie up.
———
Lexi has always been Cassie’s unofficial chaperone at parties.
It’s not that she can actually do anything about what her sister is doing, but she usually tries to prevent any earth shattering catastrophes from happening. That’s why she’s currently sifting through the crowd trying to see where Cassie has gone.
So when she spots Fez leaning on the wall far from the rest of the crowd, she puts her biggest smile on and starts heading his way. They haven’t had the opportunity to talk much, aside from a few texts here and there, since she’s been so busy with her play, but the sight of him still brightens her day. She’ll try and ask him if he’s seen Cassie. That’s a good conversation opener, right?
As she’s about to reach Fez, she feels a hand grab her arm before she’s turned around to face Ethan.
Her mood dampens slightly.
It’s not that she doesn’t like Ethan, the play has been going well and she enjoys talking with him from time to time. The problem is that ever since Kat has broken up with him, he’s been different towards her. Lexi does not know the exact details of their break-up, but from what she understands, Kat’s parting words had definitely hurt Ethan’s ego.
He’d started asking Lexi to stay behind later for rehearsals, insisting on redoing scenes that she didn’t think needed to be, he’d text her late at night inquiring about her studies or scenes she hadn’t written yet. In a way, it was nice, but she couldn’t help but think that some of their interactions were simply… forced. It was as if Ethan was grasping for straws to try and keep her attention, and Lexi might have been flattered once upon a time. But she had seen what getting with your friends’ exes did and to be frank, she just wasn’t interested in Ethan in a romantic way. He was just a nice person and an actor in her play.
“Hey, Lexi!”
“Hey, Ethan… how’s it going?”
“Great since you’ve been here!” He steps closer to her with a grin on his face, and Lexi would step back if it weren’t for the people standing behind her effectively blocking her in. His hand is also still on her arm.
“That’s nice of you to say,” she replies, before an awkward silence sets in between them as the music booms on in the background.
“So, Lexi, I was just wondering if you might, like, be free this week to, uh, like go bowling or to go see a movie, y’know?”
Lexi feels her brain short circuit. She doesn’t want to hurt Ethan’s feelings, she really doesn’t, but she also does not want to go on a date with him. She also does not want to make the rehearsals awkward for the sake of the other people involved.
“I have a boyfriend!” She blurts out in hopes that he’ll take a hint.
Ethan’s eyebrows rise in surprise, before he asks incredulously, “Really?”
Lexi might have been offended if it weren’t for the fact that she did not have a boyfriend, but it still stings that the idea of her being in a relationship is so shocking, which is why she bulldozes forward with her lies.
“Yes! Really!”
“Do I know him?”
“Probably not, he doesn’t go to our school.”
Lexi is feeling more and more flustered. Because how believable is that? That’s why she starts looking around the room, her eyes darting over faces in hopes of finding a familiar one for her charade.
So when she sees Fez again in her peripheral vision, she just points at him and says, “There! He’s my boyfriend.”
Ethan crosses his arms, in disbelief, “That could be anyone.”
Her emotions have finally built up to their peak. Embarrassment and frustration at the forefront of it all. So Lexi exclaims, “I’ll prove it!” Before storming off into the crowd and towards Fez.
Her face is a deep red that matches her dress by the time she reaches the soft spoken drug dealer. She taps on his shoulder lightly and takes a deep breath in hopes of calming down.
His eyes are a little glazed over but they light up when he recognizes her.
“Lexi Howard. What can I do for ya?” the way he says her name with this big toothy smile of his leaves her stomach in knots at what she’s about to ask.
She speaks so fast she fears he might not have understood her, “I’m so sorry, but I need you to act as my boyfriend for the rest of the night. There’s this guy—,”
“A’ight.” Simple as that.
“You, you’re fine with that? Being my fake boyfriend? Me being your girlfriend?”
“Yeah, ‘specially if I get to hang out with you, pretty girl.”
A smile small quirks up on her lips that she tries to smother down into a more neutral expression. She fails miserably. Her cheeks and ears flush red.
So she takes Fez’s hand and leads him back to Ethan, who is still looking at them with doubt obviously written on his face.
Fez takes her by her waist when they get there, fitting her smaller body into his. She leans into him feeling the comforting warmth of his body through his striped sweater. The love struck look that is on her face is definitely not fake.
“Ethan, this is Fez, my boyfriend. Fez, this is one of the actors in my play, Ethan.”
Fez just nods in acknowledgment. His hand moves from her waist to her hair, twirling the long brown strands slowly between his fingers.
“Nice to meet you, Fez. Lexi hasn’t really talked about you, at all.” His tone is bitter and his eyes venomous.
Lexi is glad that Fez is by her side, because she has never seen this side of Ethan before.
He’s not scary per say, just unsettling.
“Don’t think the two of you are that close, man.”
“Maybe not, but some might say she’s ashamed of you, man. I’ve never seen the two of you together before.”
“Ethan!” Lexi exclaims in shock. “I love Fez and he loves me! We’re just more private than other couples.”
Fez leans down and leaves a soft kiss on her cheek.
Lexi fears that if this goes on she might lose all sensation in her limbs as the blood keeps on rushing to her head.
“Yeah, well, the cast of the play is planning a dinner next week. It might be nice if your boyfriend could come and meet them.”
She turns to Fez with panic in her eyes. He just smiles lazily and faces Ethan, “I’ll be there.”