Chapter Text
It’s a quarter past three in the afternoon when Thanatos arrives home. A bit early for a regular workday, but Friday afternoons are pretty slow at the funeral home, and it’s not like he doesn’t put in enough hours to skive off early for the weekend once in a while.
Charon’s oil stain of a car is parked in their driveway. Good, he’s home. Than was hoping he’d catch Charon before he leaves to do…whatever he does on Friday nights. He doesn’t like to pry.
But after half a year of Charon never leaving their home, save for trips to and from work, Thanatos is getting a little worried. His twin Hypnos has always been a homebody, and even he manages to go out and have fun once in a while. And sure, it doesn’t take much effort – Zagreus and Meg have been around pretty much their entire lives – but Charon doesn’t have that to fall back on. He’s over a decade older than Thanatos and Hypnos, and doesn’t really talk about his own childhood friends. Or his current friends.
Does Charon even have friends? Shit, Thanatos doesn’t know. He’s a terrible brother.
Well. There’s only one way to fix that, and that brings Than to the reason he’d headed home early in the first place: he is going to get Charon out of the house at least once this winter if it kills them both. (Thanatos is under no illusions that it might.) Today is especially good for the Plan because Hypnos is out with Zagreus at a concert tonight. He’ll have the place to himself in case Charon takes offense and leaves.
Enough stalling. The front door is unlocked, and slams open harshly when Thanatos enters. Oops. “Sorry,” he mutters awkwardly at the door, and then shouts to the house at large, “Hey Charon, I’m home!”
He hears a muffled thud as he heads to the kitchen. Somewhere else in the house, a door slams. Thanatos grabs a drink from the fridge. Soon, Charon comes slouching into the kitchen, without his typical hoodie, his long, white hair half-smushed into his face.
“Rough day?” asks Than, popping the tab on the soda can.
“Nngh.”
“What.”
Napping, Charon signs, and to be fair, he does look half-asleep. He’s even wearing pajama pants and a long-sleeved shirt. Than hasn’t seen him looking so casual in months.
“Why bother getting up? Go back and finish your nap.” Thanatos pulls out his phone, projecting nonchalance. Charon can’t suspect that he’s up to something.
Awake now, Charon says dismissively.
Than knows his older brother takes midday naps fairly often, but it’s probably not a great sign that Charon is going for a beer at half past three in the afternoon. Time to put his plan into action.
Step One: start a conversation. He thinks of a neutral topic. “Work going well?”
Charon makes a so-so hand gesture with one hand as he takes a swig of his shitty beer. Step One: failure. Thanatos tries to regroup. “So, currencies. They’re, uh. Stable?” He gets a single raised eyebrow in response. So maybe he knows that Charon keeps odd hours, and that he does currency trading for work, he just doesn’t exactly know what that…is. All he knows is what Charon tells him, which isn’t much.
Than feels even more like a terrible brother. But he must forge on.
“Got any plans for the weekend?” He’s scraping the barrel at this point. At last, Charon turns to face him.
What’s this about? Charon asks with a suspicious look. I’m not standing in as a pallbearer again. I told you last time–
“No, god no,” Than says hurriedly. Charon had been a full head taller than the other pallbearers, and no matter how strong he was, the weight imbalance and subsequent flower-toppling had made him a very poor stand-in for a professional. Plus, Charon had been banned from the venue for life. Thanatos has vowed never to suggest that setup again. “I am attempting to express interest in your life.”
His older brother just stares at him, unimpressed.
Than sighs. “Okay, fine. I find myself in the unique position of wishing for a social interaction this weekend, and I wanted to see if you had any ideas.”
You. Social, Charon signs, expression flat.
“Shut up. I’m allowed to want to go out with friends.”
Charon hums skeptically, but he doesn’t leave the room, which means he might actually want to go along with this.
Thanatos ignores him. “When Hypnos gets home, I’ll inform him that I’m dragging him along too.”
Where?
“The museum. I got us tickets for the flight exhibit.” The local museum had been a frequent weekend haunt for a younger Thanatos and his brothers; his mother had enjoyed the planetarium, while Charon had found the ancient cultures fascinating. Than and Hypnos had always gone for the interactive science exhibits first, and had caused many a noise complaint, especially when Zagreus or Meg tagged along.
They hadn’t gone to the museum in years, though, and Thanatos thought this might be the perfect chance to get Charon to have some fun. It was almost the holidays, after all, and there wasn’t much he could purchase for his older brother that the man couldn’t buy himself. This would be his gift.
“I got a few extra tickets so we could invite Zagreus along, and you can bring a guest, too,” he says casually. “Or a coworker or whatever. The tour’s at one o’clock tomorrow.”
Charon pauses. He stares at Thanatos for a moment, almost calculatingly. OK, I’ll be there. Send me the tickets. Then he turns and leaves the kitchen.
Huh. That was easier than Than had thought it would be. Step Two: success! Next, on to Step Three: Museum Trip.
—
Step Three is not a success. Step Three is a disaster.
It begins at 12:48pm, when they need to leave, and Hypnos is still hogging the bathroom.
“Get out of there,” Thanatos says loudly, punctuating each word with his fist on the door. Charon is lounging on the couch behind him, wearing his typical all-black ensemble and playing on his phone, because of course he and Thanatos had been ready half an hour ago. “We have to go in two minutes.”
“Be out in a minute!” comes the cheerful reply.
Thanatos grits his teeth. “We don’t have a minute! You have thirty seconds!”
Hypnos just laughs. Thanatos is going to rip his own hair out. They’re going to be late to the museum, and then what if Charon’s friend has already left because they think they’re being stood up? Or, worse, what if Zagreus thinks he’s being stood up? No, wait, Charon’s friend is more important. What if– “Hypnos, I will leave you behind, so help me!”
The door swings open in a cloud of warm, foggy air. Hypnos is beaming. “All done!” He looks at Thanatos, then Charon. “What are you guys waiting around for? I thought we were in a hurry?” He brushes past a fuming Thanatos and swipes his purse from a chair on the way to the door.
At least they aren’t too late to the museum. Only five minutes past the hour – practically early, for Hypnos. Than spots Zagreus standing at the ticket line next to a man he’s never met before.
Oh. He’d thought maybe Charon would invite someone, but it looks like Zagreus did instead. Which is fine. Why wouldn’t it be fine?
The stranger is shorter than Zagreus by a couple of inches, which is unusual enough since Zagreus is not a tall man, but something about the new guy’s bright grin and the golden-orange scarf seems familiar.
Hypnos makes a beeline for Zagreus, of course, which makes sense because they’ve been friends forever, and Zag is the only one who can keep up with Hypnos’s chaotic energy. They chat for a minute, lost in their own little world. Thanatos is not at all jealous. In fact, his intense focus on how very unaffected he is almost makes him miss the stranger’s introduction.
“Hey, I’m Hermes,” the man pipes up. He sticks a hand out to Thanatos.
“Thanatos,” he says, shaking the stranger’s - Hermes’s – hand while keeping his twin in his periphery.
Hermes offers a cheerful grin. “Nice to meet you, coz! I work at the coffee shop down the street. Think I may have seen you around.”
That explains the familiarity. “Oh, yeah, I’ve been there once or twice,” Thanatos says. He’s not very good at this socializing thing, and he knows it, but god why did Zagreus have to choose now to wander off with Hypnos instead of introducing his friend to the group? Surely Hermes can’t have much in common with Than and Charon.
And yet, as they make small talk, turn in their tickets, and wander through the exhibit, Hermes doesn’t seem at all uncomfortable being left with the two quieter brothers. He even seems to know some ASL, and uses it to punctuate his speech. What’s more, Charon replies to him once in a while with a comment on a piece of flight history. Huh.
Hermes leaves Thanatos with his phone number and an offer of free coffee if Than or Charon feel like dropping by the shop. He tosses a cheeky salute over his shoulder as he departs.
Well, Thanatos may not have gotten to chat much with Zagreus during their outing, but he feels like a little bit less of a shitty brother. Charon at least had a good time. Maybe he’ll even end up making a new friend.