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It was around Noctis’ 17th birthday that Regis began to suspect. Perhaps, if he had been able to spend more time with his son, he might have noticed a little sooner. Noctis didn’t seem very interested in the women around him. At first, Regis considered that most of the women Noctis spent time around were counsel women and older ladies of the court. Not on the list of all young men’s heart throbs certainly. However, on the few occasions that Regis and his son could spend time together, the boy said nothing of girls, but had endless chatter in regards to his retainers and his friend Prompto.
Of course, if Noctis was gay, he would be far from the first in the Royal line to have been so, there had been rumors about a number of them – many of whom had likewise been more than a little adorned with their personal retainers. They had all married and produced at least one heir – a requirement of the crystal. When Royalty ruled by divine right, blood-line was very specific indeed.
It was on one of their rare lunches together, in the citadel gardens that Regis first tried to approach the subject.
“I’m not sure if the rumors go around about her still, but it was rather likely your great-grandmother was a lesbian,” Regis had thought bringing up a possibly gay King would be a good opening,
“I’ve never seen that fish in the pond,” his son had replied, “I keep track of them when I can, but it gets harder every year. I get less time to sit and watch them, to count them, keep track of the babies and of course, which have been eaten and which have survived,”.
“Sorry?” Regis had questioned, looking down at the pond Noctis was gazing into. It had a small gathering of fish, seemingly attracted to Noctis’ presence near the edge. Noctis was pointing towards a small black gold-fish.
His son tossed a piece of crust from his sandwich (he never ate the crust) into the water and watched, fascinated as the fish rushing to nibble at it. The knew fish in the pond, unable to reach before the others had gobbled the pieces up.
That had been the end of that conversation, which had never started.
Regis put the issue on a shelf to deal with later, when a food shortage in Leide cropped (or didn’t crop, so to speak) up, and required immediate attention. Somehow, it had taken nearly a month to work out and created several smaller problems in it wake, which took weeks to sort.
He had nearly forgotten the worries regrading Noctis’ sexuality until walking in on his son and his ‘friend’ Prompto napping in Noctis’ citadel bedroom. Initially he had dropped by with intentions to invite the prince to a small wedding ceremony between two court members, which Regis would have to attend, in the hopes of spending time with his son – though Noctis’ rarely excepted these invites.
All thoughts of wedding between petty nobility dropped from his mind and worries of Royal weddings took over. Regis didn’t want his son to be unhappy. He wanted nothing more than for Noctis to be safe and loved. The Astrals did not care for the King’s wants. He closed the door softly and let the two boys sleep, wishing them sweet dreams. They would need them.
He held off on the conversation the next few times Noctis and he spent time together, he didn’t want each meeting with his son to be pulling teeth in a conversation that neither wanted to have, for reasons more complicated that most queer children had, these days.
Lucis was fairly progressive in the queer movement, more so Insomnia and Cleigne, in Regis opinion. Insomnia having legalized same-sex marriage nearly two decades ago – years before Noctis had been born and Cleigne following suit two years later. Leide and Duscae fell slightly behind, both having legalized same-sex unions around the same time, but still having neglected moving in the direction of Marriage itself. Of course, marriage was far from the only concerns in the queer rights movement. Humorously it was Duscae that followed Insomnia right after they had made clear legal protections for transgender people and allowed one to self-declare their gender legally and free of cost.
Still, there were struggles not shared with the heterosexual and cisgender population of Lucis and even Insomnia itself that the queer community faced. Perhaps Noctis would create further change than he had been able. That was the next attempt at conversation.
“There are talks of legalizing same-sex marriage in Leide,” Regis stated during one of their “one-on-one” political meetings, that often included Ignis and Clarus. The two were absent today, at the King’s request.
“Cool,” had been the Prince’s reply, “what’s the difference between a union and a marriage anyway?”
The Six help him, did Noctis not read? He loved his son truly and dearly with all his heart, but he was more than irate at how little the Prince of the Lucis knew in terms of his own Kingdom’s politics. He would need to speak with the younger Scientia. Again.
“A few things. Civil unions are between two romantic partners that have protected rights as a couple, same as marriage. However, unions are region specific. Two people in a civil union who live in Duscae are not recognized as being in such in any other region – if the moved to Cleigne they would have to go through the process of marriage or if the moved to Leide they would have to enter a civil union with the regions’ council of partnerships. There is also the matter of name, marriage has a specific cultural significance – Noctis are you on your phone?”
One argument about responsibility later and Noctis was slamming the door of the meeting room shut. It seemed the conversation was destined to be put on hold until Noctis started to take his role as Prince more seriously.
The role that put him in such a difficult situation where love would be more complicated than unions vs marriage.
It was Clarus that next approached the subject. With all the tact that Clarus could manage.
“Your son’s queerer than a 3,000 Yen bill at a Men’s only bathhouse in the lower city,”
“What makes you say that, dear friend?” the King had sighed into his morning mug of coffee. Why did Clarus always broach this topics so early?
“Gladiolus slipped up at dinner last night, I asked if the Scientia kid was interested in Lady Moors daughter – they had danced at the last gala – and he replied, ‘Ignis manages to be gayer than Noct in a skirt’. I also assume he wears skirts, just FYI. Might wanna have a chat with him, regarding marriage and shit, Gladio absconded for the gym after that statement and has ignored me when I asked for context”.
“Remind me to never give state secret’s out to your son, Clarus,” Regis downed the last of his coffee, “And I know. About the gay thing – not the skirt thing. He’s dodged me every time I’ve tried to bring it up.”
“Use less tact,” Clarus suggested, “You have a meeting in a half hour with Lord Moors, by the way. I suggest dodging any questions about the Scientia kid and his daughter,”.
So Regis took his shield's advice. On both dodging Lord Moors attempts to find out Scientia’s intentions towards his daughter and on using less tact with Noctis. One of these things went better than the other.
“So, Clarus said that Gladiolus mentioned you might be Gay,” the words were spat out as quickly as Regis could manage them. Being tactless had never been among the King’s skill set.
Noctis had promptly dropped his glass of champagne on the ballroom floor, stormed over to his shield and started a fight that landed on national TV and every gossip rag and New Paper in Insomnia. Perhaps he should have saved tactlessness for a more private setting.
Afterwards, his son managed to avoid any contact with Regis for a month and according to Clarus had not been on speaking terms with Gladiolus for the same period of time. In the end, Clarus had elected to lock both of the boys in a training room with Cor for 12 hours. Both came out bruised, Cor as well looked like he had taken a beating, but the two seemed to have put most of the Gala fight and Gladiolus’ slip up to rest.
Cor informed him that the two had teamed up to, “kick his ass,” after he insulted their honor and implied the two were ‘fucking’ – in Cor’s words. He might have also used some un-kind words. Cor assured him he was able to say them on account of being one himself. The man seemed to get a strange kick out of pretending to be homophobic, though he later assured the boys he was just trying to get them back on the same team.
It took another month for Noctis to stop avoiding Regis, however. Much to the King’s aching heart.
Surprisingly it was Noctis who approached him first, asking to eat lunch in the gardens. Regis had dropped a meeting on some rather important state affairs in order to do so. They sat at the edge of the pond once more, Noct pulling the crust of his bread and feeding the fish.
“There are less of them now, than there were the last time we were here,” Again, it was Noctis that spoke first.
“It does look so, I wonder if the small gold-fish you spotted is among the larger ones now?” Regis spoke softly.
“I’d like to think do,” there was a long pause, “do you think they’re less fish because of me? I don’t feed them as often as I used to. Ignis and I would sneak out here during the night, when we were kids. We would feed them and sometimes they’d let me run my fingers over there scales,”.
“I doubt the gardeners let them go hungry, my child. You and Ignis are both children, still,” Regis said with a small smile.
“We aren’t,” Noctis denied, “I’m the Prince of more than half of the largest continent on Eos and Ignis has more responsibilities than half the council. We aren’t kids anymore,”.
“I’m sorry, I wish you still were, my sweet boy. I wish I could have been a common man and given you a longer boyhood,” and it was true.
“When we were kids,” Noctis started with a sigh and repeated “Ignis and I would sneak out here during the night,”.
“Yes?” Regis waited as the time ticked by in silence.
“We would feed the fish. And sometimes we would kiss,” he confessed, “we don’t anymore. I guess at some point we realized we weren’t supposed to. We never talked about it,”.
“I’m sorry, son,” Regis watched the fish circle in the pond. He wondered how many generations of fish had done nothing but circle in the pond, knowing nothing but it’s water and the faces of people who had gazed into it.
Regis pulled Noctis into a hug and they stayed like that until the sunset, duties of Kings and Princes forgotten for a night of pondering the fish.