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Peter's day so far had been pretty okay, all things considered. He'd aced his chemistry test- getting full marks and Flash hadn't been too bad- the odd comment here and there, the usual calling of him 'Penis Parker' but he seemed to be easing off the bullying a bit. Then everything went down hill when his history lesson was about HYDRA. He was used to hiding his emotions outwardly, but inwardly he was panicking, his heart pounding. He tried to lie, say he was ill but the teacher said he would be fine and refused to let him go to the nurses office.
About a quarter of the way through the Winter Soldier program was brought up, Peter had to fight off his growing panic- sensing himself spiraling further and further. And then, the video began to speak about the trigger words before reading them out.
Longing, rusted.
Peter collapsed to the floor clutching his head as if that could stop the Winter Soldier programming. He let out a pained yelp.
Seventeen, day break.
Peter whimpered, everyone's attention on him. Flash and his friends laughed at Peter and mocked him. Ned tried to reach out to Peter who flinched backwards, afraid of what he could do to Ned.
Furnace, nine, benign.
"Please, please stop. I can't do this again. Please." Peter begged, writhing in pain as tears fell and the words burned his mind.
Homecoming, one.
Peter continued to beg and plead, clutching his head- crying out for help.
Freight car.
As soon as Peter heard the final word the cries stopped, his hands moved away from his head and all emotion left his face. He stood up robotically, facing the class with an expression on his face that terrified them all.
"Я готов отвечить." Ready to comply. Peter said, his voice completely void of any emotion. No body knew what to do for a few moments, no-one piecing together what had happened.
"Peter, are you okay?" Ned asked cautiously. Peter gave no response, still staring coldly ahead awaiting instructions from his handler.
As soon as Peter's heartbeat spiked when the video started, Tony was in his suit on the way to Peter's school. He knew something must be wrong.
"Come on Parker, stop this stupid act." Flash sneered, although everyone noticed how his voice wavered, as if not believing what he had just said. Peter still showed no reaction- his mind empty awaiting to be filled with orders. A few moments later Tony Stark burst into the classroom, much to the shock of everyone.
"Peter, what's wrong? What's going on?" Tony asked softly yet still Peter didn't react.
"What happened?" Tony barked at the class.
"We were just watching a video on HYDRA when suddenly Peter collapsed, his head must have been hurting because he kept clutching it and he begged for it to stop, which we did pause it eventually." The teacher stuttered out, completely overwhelmed by the situation. Tony took one look at the screen and knew exactly what had happened, Peter had been triggered by the words again; Tony's heart broke thinking about what that must have been like for Peter.
"Look at me." Tony ordered, knowing that Peter would respond to that. "You have to listen to what I tell you." He instructed. He felt awful ordering Peter around, but he had to do it- no matter how guilty he felt about it.
So, Tony began to talk to Peter about who he was- the real Peter Parker- and not the Spider. He talked to Peter about all the time spent in the lab working on various things, all the movie nights, the first time he met the Avengers and when he managed to pick up Mjolnir, something none of the others had managed to do. He talked about everything he could think of to try and get him to remember and purge the effect of the words from his mind, but there was nothing- no reaction; Peter just stared blankly at Tony as he spoke. Peter's class mates and teacher were confused as to what was happening and what was wrong with Peter- he looked to them to be in some kind of a trance, MJ and Ned knew the truth and a couple of others, based on their reaction, seemed to piece together what was happening with Peter- they just couldn't quite believe it.
He gestured to Ned to help, thinking maybe he could get through to Peter- all they had to do was help him remember. Ned talked to Peter about the latest Lego they were building, and all the Star Wars they watched together- he talked about all the happy memories they shared together and still nothing. Even as MJ joined in Peter showed no recognition of them or what they were saying.
At this point, in a state of complete despair, Tony broke down crying as he was unable to control his emotions, fearing he has lost his son again to HYDRA. Everyone was stunned by this, a man seemingly invincible, and strong breaking down in front of them, but he didn't care- he just wanted his son back.
"Please baby, please come back to me. I can't lose you again Pete please." Tony cried, grabbing hold of Peter's hand and held it tightly. "I love you so much Pete, please come back, please." Tony was crying harder now as he was begging for Peter to remember who he was.
Peter's stoic look flickered, a look of recognition passing across his face at Tony's words and the emotion he was displaying. Everything flooded back into his head as HYDRA was purged from his head once more.
"D-dad." Peter chocked out before collapsing to the floor, sobbing heavily. Tony instantly got onto his level and pulled Peter into a tight hug. Peter clung to Tony like a life-line and sobbed into his chest. Tony whispered soft reassurances to Peter as the two cried and hugged in front of Peter's bewildered class.
Eventually, when the two had calmed down, one of Peter's classmates spoke up- asking what had just happened. Tony was about to tell them that it was none of their business when Peter spoke up, saying they might as well explain after what had just happened.
"You don't have to tell them, not if you don't want to." Tony said softly as the two of them took a seat, facing Peter's class. Peter reassured Tony that he was okay and said that he didn't really have much of a choice.
"I was kidnapped, by HYDRA, and using the same program they used on The Winter Soldier- they made me into The Winter Spider. They used the same trigger words as they did with him, so hearing them on that video brought it all back. I wasn't me any more, I was The Spider. That's why I panicked when I heard the words because I couldn't go back there, not after what they made me do." Peter explained, missing out exactly what it was HYDRA forced him to do and the fact he was mercilessly and inhumanely tortured whilst there.
Several gasps could be heard as Peter's classmates heard his explanation, their expressions a mix between shock and horror.
"My God Peter, I'm so sorry." His teacher said, looking about ready to cry as she felt nothing but guilt for playing that video. Peter shook his head as if to say that there was no need to apologise.
"What happened to you, whilst you were there?" Cindy dared to ask. The others wanted to, but none of them were willing to actually ask.
"They tortured me, broke down my mind until it was theirs to control. I was tortured and experimented on until I was the perfect, unbreakable soldier. Then they'd send me out on missions, I'd kill whoever they wanted me to kill and wouldn't realise what I had done until I was rescued and no longer under the influence of their control. That's why I now use my powers for good as Spider-Man. I hurt and killed too many people and I can't ever take that back. I can't fix what HYDRA made me do, but I can help people now with my powers, rather that them being used to hurt people. I can't bring back the people that I killed, but I can try and save others who need help" Peter sounded ashamed when he spoke of the people who were killed when he was being controlled by HYDRA. He sounded utterly broken and defeated. A few tears fell from his sorrow filled eyes as a few others in the room, including Tony, were crying as Peter spoke.
None of Peter's class knew what to say or how to process this, that one of their classmates, their friend, had been through so much and yet was still managing to live a normal life, still seemed happy after living through hell.
"You didn't kill those people Peter. HYDRA did; and you're a hero by using your powers for good." MJ spoke up, giving Peter a soft but sad smile. Peter mouthed a 'thank you' to her, not trusting his voice. Other murmured an agreement. A silence fell across the room as people tried to process the situation.
"Let's get you home Pete." Tony said as he stood up. Peter nodded, getting up and clinging to Tony who put his arm around Peter. No-one said anything as the two left, but all of them agreed to not talk about it to Peter again as it was obvious how much it affected him and how much pain it causes him.
Peter didn't leave Tony's side for the next week, partially because he didn't want to be away from him, and partially because Tony didn't want to let Peter out of his sight, which was understandable. When Peter returned to school, no-one mentioned the incident, which Peter was incredibly grateful for. None of them judged Peter for his past or what HYDRA made him do, but that's not to say they didn't see him in a different light- they saw him as a survivor, as a hero- someone who endured so much yet still has a smile on his face, still does everything he can to help other people. Peter has been through some of the darkest things a person could go through, yet still manages to bring light and hope to other people. Peter had feared that if people found out the truth about his past they would hate him- but he was wrong, none of them hated him- they hated HYDRA for what they did, and as for Peter- they had a new found respect for him; he has been through more than any of them could possibly imagine, yet still carries on, still tried to make the world a better place.