Chapter Text
- Liyuen Lads -
Xiao: Fucking bitch.
Childe: What did I do?!
Xiao: Exist.
Hu Tao: The way he knew it was him lmao.
Zhongli: Did something happen? Why are you upset at Childe, Xiao? 😢
Xiao: Every time I read his name I want to let a demon consume me.
Xiao: Why is he still in this group?! Isn’t he leaving soon?
Childe: You’re just jealous I have someone waiting for me at home- asshole.
Yanfei: Damn-
Xiao: …
- Xiao has Muted the chat -
Hu Tao: Welp, you’ve done it now Fatui man! You may be good for business, but that was mean.
Childe: He’s the one that hates me for no reason?!
Yanfei: Well, you’re certainly giving him reasons to now 👀 .
Zhongli: Ah, that was rather insensitive, Childe.
Zhongli: I shall make sure that he is alright.
Childe: Erm- Sorry?
Zhongli: I think it isn’t me who you should be apologising to.
Childe: ugh. Fine.
Childe: I’ll check if the little Adeptus is alright 🙄.
Zhongli: Thank you, Childe 😊.
Childe: Yeah yeah, whatever.
Hu Tao: Lmaooooo Zhongli this man is like your dog stg.
Zhongli: Please, do not refer to Childe as a ‘dog’.
Zhongli: Everyone so far is exceptionally mean today.
Hu Tao: Like, ok mum jeez.
Yanfei: I thought Ningguang was the ‘mum’ tho?
Hu Tao: Gay rights? We can have two mums.
Yanfei: But- Zhongli-
——
- Direct Chat: Childe to Xiao -
Childe: hey- look. Sorry if what I said was insensitive.
Childe: You're an immortal being and so you've experienced a lot of loss and the like.
Childe: As such I hope you can forgive me?
Xiao: As if you could hurt me.
Xiao: I'm just going to make you seem like the biggest fucking asshole around.
Xiao: The ultimate goal is for Zhongli to hate your ass.
Childe: what?!
Childe: So you just made a scene to make me look bad?!
Xiao: Please fatui boy, you act like this is some big scheme.
Xiao: It's a half-assed plan I came up with a few minutes ago- you're not even worth more than a thought.
Childe: Wow.
Childe: Suddenly I feel a lot less bad about that comment- you unlovable prick!
Xiao: I’ll beat your ass.
Childe: I'd like to see you try shorty! I'll fight you if I can distinguish you from the grass I step on.
----
- Liyuen Lads-
Zhongli: Childe sure is gone a while.
Zhongli: I do hope him and Xiao can get along 😊.
Hu Tao: Lmao sorry grandpa, that's as likely as a cat liking water.
Yanfei: I mean... That does happen-
Childe: I'm back.
Zhongli: Oh! How did it go? 😌
Childe: We’re having a fight like, tomorrow.
Hu Tao: lolol well that took a turn-
Hu Tao: @Xiao!! Can you confirm?
Beidou: Didn't he mute chat?
Hu Tao: Omg Beidou hiiii! What beings you here?
Beidou: Funny enough that exact reason.
Beidou: Came here to silence this chaos.
- Beidou Muted the Chat-
Hu Tao: Well that's sad-