Archive of Our Own

Sehun woke up feeling well-rested for the first time in months. 

He rubbed his heavy eyelids, frowning as he was suddenly aware of the blinding sunlight from the open-curtain window. Groaning heavily, he pulled himself from the burrito of blanket and rolled over, stretching his hand to reach at the other side of the bed. 

There was something solid, warm and fluffy there. 

Sehun opened his eyes only to see Monsieur staring at him, panting softly with a tongue out. 

"Ah," Sehun chuckled in a hoarse voice, sighing loudly. "Hello, it's you. Do you miss me?" Monsieur stared at him. "I'm expecting someone else though," he said without any heat. The dog slowly approached him and pushed at Sehun's arm with his nose. Sehun scratched his head as a greeting. "Where is he?" 

Monsieur let out a pleasant growl. 

Sehun took his phone, realized that someone had charged the battery, and looked at the time. Eleven am in the morning. No wonder he woke up alone. 

"Okay, okay, I'm up. Let's go have some breakfast yeah?" Sehun forced himself to sit and stretched to loosen up his numb muscles. 

Sehun had been working at the filming set for three days straight without coming home. It went smoothly and successfully, relieved that the nice weather was on their side despite the forecasters predicted that it would rain in the coming days. When the filming wrapped up for the week and he came back home, exhausted and sore, it was still early evening and Monsieur was still at the caretaker. He thought about picking his dog up, but a stern incoming message stopped him from doing so. Sehun had been too tired and drained out to say otherwise, so after getting a shower and ate a bowl of jajangmyeon he ordered from delivery, he had passed out on the bed for eighteen hours straight.

"He was very insistent about me getting sleep that I missed him," Sehun said, looking at Monsieur. The dog just pushed him again. "You're hungry, aren't you? All right, I'm going."

With his phone in hand, Sehun found a shirt, and walked towards the kitchen, yawning. 

When he reached the kitchen counter, there's a couple of tupperwares waiting for him. Surprised, Sehun sneaked to see the contents and saw a pair of simple turkey sandwiches, two rolls of tuna gimbap with side dishes like kimchi, spicy cucumber, soy-sauce eggplants, steamed bean sprouts and pickled radish. A note was placed at the side to tell him to finish the food. 

Sehun grinned widely, feeling his heart too big for his body, as he looked down to his feet to see Monsieur watching him expectedly. The dog's bowl was already half filled with food and the water was already changed. 

"So you didn’t wake me up to ask for food, but rather asking me to eat my food that he prepared?" Sehun bent down and scratched Monsieur behind the ears. "You clever boy."

When the group first discussed their upcoming mandatory services and how the group will hold up during the time, some of them thought it would be better to enlist together at the same time, so they could also come back together. 

That's what Sehun had been suggesting for years, initially wanting to go the same year as his hyungs, especially Junmyeon. But predictably, Junmyeon— despite his initial constant worries about leaving Sehun and Jongin as the last ones to go for their services— had calmed down a lot after Minseok and Kyungsoo enlisted in the same year, and denied Sehun's request strongly. Junmyeon was adamant and said it would be good for them to take up experience as much as they could before going to the service. 

Sehun hated to say it, but Junmyeon was right. And as it happened, when the year 2020 rolled in, he got offered with more and more deals and opportunities and inevitably got busier. He took the chance and grabbed it, even as far as going for an audition for a movie and was offered as one of the main cast. And so, at the age of 27, the year he thought he was going to go for his mandatory service, became another career-driven year. 

"It's okay! I will replace you," Jongdae had whispered to him with a grin, when Sehun and Junmyeon had come over to visit him one weekend. "I'm planning to go this year with Junmyeon-hyung. Because he's my favorite."

Sehun snorted. He couldn't deny that. Junmyeon might even replaced Minseok-hyung's position of being Jongdae's favorite member. He’s a bit glad, but also jealous. 

The result of the preliminary health test came out the day Sehun wrapped up the last filming for the variety show. Junmyeon had ripped the envelope, and Sehun came over to his side so they could read it together. He was the first to witness the mixed feelings that crossed Junmyeon's face. But Junmyeon already half-figured what the result was going to be. He knew his own body more than anyone else. 

"I made a mistake to write the eighteen-months in that bucket list sheet," Junmyeon snickered. His eyes cast downwards, playing with the hem of his shirt consciously. He was nervous. They haven't stopped working since their debut, so it's nerve-wrecking to suddenly have so much time in your hands. 

Sehun didn't know what to do to make him feel better, so he just pulled Junmyeon to the couch, sitting him on his lap as he rubbed Junmyeon's back gently. 

"You have a lot of time to write songs now," Sehun smiled at him. 

Junmyeon laced his fingers behind Sehun's neck, smiling as well. "There is this series that I have been meaning to watch, I can finally start on them. And, and—" he looked excited, looking for a bright side. "I can finally pick up guitar lessons. Jeonghan and I have been talking about it for so long but we never got to do it because of my schedule—" 

Sehun indulgently listened to Junmyeon's rant about guitar and bakeries and art galleries, before leaning forward to catch him mid-rant into a deep kiss.

It was only for four weeks, Sehun kept telling himself. It's much better than what he expected. Then he could have Junmyeon back by his side, all the time.

Despite telling himself that, Sehun became a bit depressed. Not only it would be the first time they couldn't see each other for four weeks, but it would also be the first time he would not be able to celebrate Junmyeon's birthday. But he held it in, thinking about how Junmyeon was feeling. He had expected to only be gone from the entertainment industry for eighteen months, but now—

He looked down to his chest, where Junmyeon was hiding his face, sleeping peacefully. His naked shoulder seemed to gleam from the street light coming from the window. 

Sehun was dozing off on the sofa when the front door unlocked, soft footsteps creaked into the apartment. Sehun smiled to himself as he felt above his head, searching for the switch for the standing lamp, and turned it on.

Junmyeon let out a yelp when the apartment suddenly turned bright.

“What are you doing sneaking around like a thief?” Sehun peeked from the sofa, putting his head on the handrest. Junmyeon stood in the middle of the room, blinking. He’s still in work trousers, with black, short-sleeve shirt. He hid his hair under a black baseball cap, a black backpack over his shoulder. Black upon black upon black. So unlike Junmyeon. Sehun’s heart clenched briefly.

“I thought you’re asleep,” Junmyeon said, taking off his mask. Then his hat. Junmyeon had begun growing out his top hair, but he still kept the short cut at the side. Sehun thought he still looked good. “I didn’t send Monsieur to the caretaker today because you’re home, that’s fine right?”

“Of course!” Sehun glanced at Monsieur who was still sleeping deeply at the corner. “I’m thinking about taking him out for a walk, go change and let’s go together.”

Junmyeon grinned. “Okay okay, wait a minute.” Then he headed to the kitchen, checking the pantry. “Did you finish off the food?”

“Yeah?”

“...How was it?”

Sehun put his chin over his palm, eyes turned soft as he imagined Junmyeon preparing the meals for him. It didn’t matter that the onions and cucumbers were not evenly sliced, the sloppy way the turkey was placed on the bread, or the teared off seaweed at the side of gimbap. “They’re delicious.”

Junmyeon’s check flushed and he smiled happily. 

Sehun loved him.

After around ten minutes, they were already out on the street, Junmyeon driving while Sehun sat with Monsieur on his lap. They stopped at a quiet neighbourhood with a small, uphill park. They parked the car under a shady tree by the side of the road, took their stuff and made sure the collar was secured around Monsieur before they headed out.

Sehun and Junmyeon walked side by side, shoulders brushing lightly, as they let Monsieur lead them through the pathways. The park scenery was serene and quiet, and there's barely any other people around, so Junmyeon slipped to lace his fingers with Sehun's. 

"How was your day at work?" Sehun asked quietly under his mask, his thumb rubbing Junmyeon's skin absent-mindedly. 

"Good," Junmyeon replied. Sehun glanced at his side and just basked in delight at simply watching Junmyeon going on about his day. "—So we were assisting the kindergarten kids to get to the museum, and they're such well-behaved kids. They listened well and the teachers said they never see the kids act like that," he snickered softly under his mask. Monsieur tugged them to a corner, sniffing the bushes, and they sat down at the nearest bench.

"That's because you're good with them." Sehun said pleasantly. 

"I wouldn't be able to do it alone, though. My co-worker is an expert with kids, he has many siblings and his youngest brother is in elementary school, it's mostly him that the kids listen to."

Sehun sighed. Junmyeon's old habit kept coming back. It's hard to break them. "The kids like you though, I saw the pictures you took. They're all over you, not just your co-worker."

Junmyeon just nodded, but he seemed grateful that Sehun was trying to cheer him up. After a while, they resumed walking as Monsieur was done with the area. 

“You still haven’t told me about your filming. When will it be done?”

It wasn’t a cold night, as summer air was blazing hot during the day, but the night air wasn’t as humid. Sehun tugged Junmyeon’s arm under his elbow. “Several months more. We were filming the sea part and soon we will be training for the fight scene.” He couldn’t hide his excitement at the opportunity to do action scenes and Junmyeon looked at him, eyes sparkling in crescent moon and Sehun was pretty bum about the masks because he really wanted to kiss Junmyeon right now. “Anyway, the filming will resume after they had the location and props secured, and I’m also done with the photoshoot. You have three days off starting tomorrow for the public holiday right?”

Junmyeon tilted his head. “Yes?”

“Let’s go somewhere,” Sehun said. “It doesn’t need to be far. But let's spend time together, just the two of us.”

“Let’s go somewhere,” Junmyeon repeated out loud, standing in front of the wardrobe, staring at his endless clothes. “He said, ‘let’s go somewhere’ as if he just thought about it, but no— he already planned it all and even booked the place!” 

Sehun stared at him amusedly, with Monsieur in his arms. “It will only be two days and two nights, you don’t need to bring much.”

“I know that,” Junmyeon glared at him. “But I have no idea where we’re going and I don’t know how to match my clothes with the place.”

“I told you it’s a surprise,” Sehun chuckled and put down Monsieur, as the dog shuffled out of the room, not wanting to be a part of their antics. “Just get something natural? The place we will be staying in is a wooden-style lodge and it's near a mountain and a river.” He walked close and put an arm around Junmyeon’s shoulder. “Is the hint enough?”

Junmyeon’s eyes immediately wandered to a section where he had his multiple summer shirts. “I guess so.”

When Sehun had told the plan earlier, Junmyeon had been pretty excited— they haven’t been anywhere together that year, just the two of them. Sehun did, however, went to Jeju Island for a couple of days but it’s mostly to get his diving license. And Junmyeon went to a couple of places around Seoul with his friends, but most of his weekend whenever Sehun was working, he focused on his acoustic guitar lesson or just hanging out at home. Junmyeon, in his excitement, opened instagram to seek for anywhere close that they can go. Sehun stopped him by confessing that he already booked a place but Junmyeon had to wait until they got there. They ended up going home after Monsieur grew tired, and Sehun ordered a delivery for their dinner while Junmyeon drove, pouting.

Sehun smiled and pulled Junmyeon to a kiss— finally— he had been dying to do that since earlier— as the front doorbell rang. “It must be the delivery man. Let’s go have dinner first then we can start packing.”

Junmyeon let himself be pulled from the wardrobe room, and before they reached the door to pick up the food, he hopped on one foot to smack a kiss on the side of Sehun’s neck.

“I’m really happy though, thank you.”

Sehun glanced at him, smiling proudly to himself.

By eight in the morning the next day, they dropped Monsieur at a friend’s house who agreed to take care of him for a couple of days while they were gone, and stopped by the market to buy the things they need; meat, eggs, vegetables, instant rice, chocolates and some other things they need for a barbeque. They brought their own expensive bottle of wine from home, and a pack of homemade kimchi that Sehun’s mother had sent to them a couple of weeks prior.

They talked all the way as Sehun drove, and turned on the OSTs that Junmyeon had on his playlist. The weather was perfect and the sky was blue, there's barely any other vehicles on the highway even though it's a public holiday, so they rolled down the windows and let the wind sweep their cheeks and hair. Sehun put on his sunglasses, and Junmyeon leaned his head on the window ledge, staring at him while he sang softly, one knee pulled over his chest. Sehun relaxed under the attention, singing along whenever he recognized a tune.

Somehow, their Las Vegas trip suddenly dawned upon Sehun and he smiled to himself at the memory.

After about half an hour on the highway, they got off at a rest stop for a quick breakfast. They came out of the store with two cups of coffee, a melon bun, a waffle and an ice cream cone, as they went to sit at a bench under a huge parasol to eat.

"How far is this place?" Junmyeon asked, fanning himself with his cap, one hand holding the ice cream. "Are you sure this is the road?" 

"Yes, I checked the directions last night. Why, are you worried if we're going to some remote place like where you sent Chanyeol?" Sehun teased him, and Junmyeon gasped before punching him lightly on the shoulder. 

"Don't you dare," he looked scandalous for a minute, but he chuckled in amusement when he thought about it again. "He called me afterwards and complained so much about the sunburn and mosquito bites that he got.” Sehun laughed, because Chanyeol had called him and said the same thing. “But in the end he thanked me for that summer beach reward."

Sehun was pretty sure that another side of Junmyeon got some enjoyment from how detailed he planned the entire camping trip for Chanyeol. It was pretty impressive. "No, it won't be the same as that. But it is a place so private, that no one—" he leaned close to catch Junmyeon's lips, and tasted the ice cream as he licked inside his mouth. "—and I mean no one; can disturb us."

Junmyeon licked his own lips when they parted, and the ice cream he's holding dripped down his wrist. "I hold on to that promise."

Sehun grinned pleasantly at him. "Looks like I will have your full attention this weekend."

"They found out."

The three words that made Sehun rooted on the spot, feeling numb and a bit confused. Then he looked at Junmyeon's expression, and immediately knew exactly what he was talking about. 

Sehun put down his can of beer on the coffee table, making sure he wouldn't make a mess. 

"And what did they say?" 

"They want to see us."

Sehun knew they would. 

Sehun and Junmyeon started dating at the end of 2017. After much hardships and misunderstandings and insecurities; the push-and-pull, the what-ifs, both of them finally brave enough to come clean with their feelings. One night, they decided to sit down and had a lengthy talk about it. Sehun finally whispered all his concealed crush on the elder boy, and Junmyeon finally confessed how the past affections that he masked as brotherly skinship has turned into something more— in which Sehun teased him how their late night Paris rendezvous was anything but ‘brotherly’— and Junmyeon hit him hard on the shoulder with a red face. In the next morning, their relationship status changed.

Of course, it’s not something that could easily be exposed to the world. The first person who knew was Junmyeon’s own best friend, who he had known for ten years, and also someone who they both trusted with their lives. Someone who had their best interests in heart, someone with a similar circumstances, who understands, level-headed— someone who is supportive through and through. The one who they knew wouldn't judge them no matter what. Because they both still have that fear— of being a disappointment, unaccepted.

They spent the entire 2018 keeping quiet, but madly in love, and hardly seen without each other. Sehun was giddy and just had to open his camera and went on live on one tiring night in March, just to show off to the world, giving the people a glimpse of their happiness. He visited the filming site, got to know the other cast who was filming with his lover, and sent abundant gifts to show his appreciation and support. Sehun was as transparent as a glass wall, but Junmyeon was reserved. Junmyeon became more careful with his affection in front of cameras, but his adoration for Sehun pouring from every pore of his being was hard to go unnoticed. From the way Junmyeon sent flowers with just a heart on the card, to being the MC for his and Chanyeol's first debut showcase. Sehun didn’t mind, he enjoyed the attention he got in the privacy of their own space. He suspected the members were already aware of their changed relationship status, though they were waiting patiently for both of them to tell it instead, and Sehun appreciated that.

Sehun didn’t know how the management found out, but they did. He never had such personal meetings even when his ‘preference’ became widely known and turned into an infamous rumor. All he ever received was strong advice to be careful and take responsibility for their own actions— addressed to the whole team in a big group meeting.

“Okay,” Sehun nodded, and his heart hurt when he saw the crestfallen expression on Junmyeon’s face. “Hey,” he immediately flew to Junmyeon’s side, running a comforting hand down his arm. “Are you okay?”

Junmyeon nodded once, then shook his head. “I don’t know, let’s just get this over with.”

The people around the table didn’t say how they found out, only a passing of the words “LA” and “insiders” came out a few times, and Sehun thought back on their last trip to the United States, going around their favorite city, playing pretend on red sand with blue sky, thinking they were unknown. The faceless people around the table weren’t cruel though; they didn’t say that he and Junmyeon should break up to ease the “insiders”, but they didn't actually acknowledge it either. They simply didn't bother to know.

Both of them were told to lay low, to be more cautious, to stay hidden. No signatures necessary, as it wasn’t an official arrangement, but it felt like it had been set in stone.

For a few months, they tried to abide by the advice. And it’s working since they were both busy with their own schedules. Junmyeon went to travel— Italy, Paris, Australia, Japan— endless countries with endless pictures and endless time writing in his little notebook. While Sehun prepared for songs, performances, rehearsal, group meetings— and whenever they met for a concert or group practice, they tried to be “cautious”, as they were told.

Junmyeon was struggling, and Sehun found himself struggling as well. They missed each other too much, and being apart means misunderstandings, and then there were fights.

And they’re bad at fighting each other. 

The members of course, found out at the end, and as expected, they weren’t surprised in the slightest. 

“Just be yourself more,” Chanyeol said, picking a meat to place it in Junmyeon’s plate. “You can be yourself in front of us.”

“It’s not like it would make any difference, you two have been close since forever.” Baekhyun commented, shrugging while staring at the boiling dish in front of him. 

“Minseok-hyung would agree,” Jongdae smiled at them. “You don’t have to pretend so much if it only hurts you later on.”

Jongin nodded. “We’re happy for both of you.”

Kyungsoo turned to Sehun, a hand rested on his back. Sehun would miss him when he goes to the military. “Take care of each other as you always have,”

Yixing even sent some encouragement via text messages and video calls, and Sehun was grateful at the familiar faces telling him it's alright to be who he is.

After everything settled down, and their schedule wasn’t so hectic anymore, Sehun received a call from Junmyeon, asking when he would be coming home. Sehun was supposed to be meeting a group of actor friends that night, but he quickly said he would be home as soon as possible, and hesitated when he uttered the word “I love you” at the end of the conversation. He gave a small smile when Junmyeon replied with the same “I love you”, his voice gentle and comforting.

He had arrived at his apartment half an hour later, feeling nervous. What if Junmyeon decided that it’s not working out between them, and that they should call it quit? What would happen then? How could he handle it? How can he convince Junmyeon to reconsider? Oh my god— he didn’t want to break up— he didn’t want to leave Junmyeon— Please, god—

The moment he stepped into the apartment, Junmyeon was already waiting for him; pulling him inside, closed the door and pushed him to the wall, kissing him on the mouth. Sehun instinctively circled his arms around the smaller body, holding him tight as he returned the kiss in the same passion. 

“I don’t care anymore,” Junmyeon breathed out, shuddering against Sehun’s chest. “I don’t care what they said we should do, I don’t care what the people would think, I only want you—”

To say that Sehun was relieved that it wasn’t a break up as he thought it would, was an understatement. He tugged at the back of Junmyeon’s shirt, pulling it up and tossing it to the floor. Then he stopped.

"Is it okay with you?" he whispered, closing his eyes. His eyes burned behind the eyelids, cursing at the faceless people around the table— the “insiders”— himself. "There's— consequences, being with a man like me."

Junmyeon stared at him, as if searching for something. "I'm a man just like you," Junmyeon whispered back. "We are no different. I'm aware of the consequences."

Sehun felt the tears gathering on his eyelashes. A thumb gently touched the corner of his eyes.

“Sehunnie?"

He's afraid. Under the tough and monotonous exterior, deep down, Sehun was scared. He didn't wish for this to happen. Junmyeon always had a good reputation, and he certainly didn't wish to drag Junmyeon down with him. "I don't want to hurt you."

Junmyeon left a ghost of touch by his cheek. "Tough luck, I'm not planning to let you go."

Sehun let out a slight and surprised chuckle.

Junmyeon smiled. "It's okay to be afraid. We can hurt each other, but we can also heal each other, right?  We can take care of each other." Junmyeon took his face in his palms, and Sehun's eyes flew open.

"I'm not a burden to you?" Sehun asked slowly.

"If anything, I think I'm the one who is being a burden to you," Junmyeon sighed, their foreheads touching. "Sehun, I'm in love with you."

Take responsibility for your own actions. They would. They are. That's what they have been doing all these time, anyway.

No more avoiding each other. No more misunderstanding. No more pretending. 

Clear as day.

After another hour, they finally arrived at the location. It’s a glamping and villa site located near Hongcheon. They were greeted by the greenery of fields, surrounded by hills and sparkling river, a perfect place for a getaway from the bustling city. The owner of the place came out to greet them after they parked the car, followed by her assistant who helped them with their baggage into a buggy cart. Once the assistant drove away with their things, another cart came forward to bring them to their own villa.

“This private villa is separately located from the rest of the camps, and has a different entrance so you don’t need to worry about any crowd.” The owner explained. “All cooking utensils are provided in the kitchen for you to cook meals, but we also provide room service so you may order what you like, there’s a menu in your room. There’s a small cafe at the main building over there, and also a korean restaurant nearby, but you need to drive a bit to go there.”

Junmyeon looked at Sehun, and Sehun just raised an eyebrow.

They arrived at a villa made with dark, grey wood, facing the river and the mountain, thus they have plenty of privacy. The entrance was a one way pathway towards the villa surrounded by shrubs. At the front of the villa, there’s a veranda with a bbq grill, a picnic table and four chairs; with two welcome drinks and a basket of fruits. Upon entering, they quickly noticed the huge window overlooking the scenery, just beside a huge jacuzzi bathtub. The kitchen was small but well equipped with a fridge, a microwave, a sink and a small stove. The bathroom was at the side of the room and the double bed was located at the back of the room with a skylight where it’s more quiet from the sound of nature.

“I hope you have a pleasant stay,” she said as she bowed, as her assistant brought all their things into the villa and gave them the card key.

Both Sehun and Junmyeon bowed back, and thanked them, waiting until both of the carts were out of sights. 

“Come here,” Junmyeon gestured to the welcome drinks, passing one glass to Sehun. “Cheers for our getaway,”

They clinked their glasses and tilted up; Sehun realized Junmyeon already down half of the drink, licked his lips and moved towards him until he could press his chest over Sehun’s, and nibbled on his neck. 

“Are you feeling frisky so early into the holiday?” Sehun asked, but he put down his glass so he could wrap his arms around Junmyeon. 

“I’ve missed you,” Junmyeon muttered, leaving trails of kisses from Sehun’s neck to his jawline, teasing his long hair. “We live together but we barely see each other.”

It’s true, Sehun couldn’t deny it. And that’s why whenever they have free time, they always try hard to spend it together. Some days Junmyeon would come to visit him at the photoshoot or filming location, and some days Sehun would come along to Junmyeon's outing with his friends. 

They never thought it was hard work, because they know and understand each other, and they would always make it work. That's just how they do. 

“Me too, I've missed you.” Sehun slipped his fingers around the back of Junmyeon’s neck so he could hold him in place before he angled his head to reach Junmyeon's lips. They stayed outside for a while like that, pressed close, arms around each other as they kissed. 

“We are so careless,” Junmyeon commented after they parted, reaching up to fold Sehun’s ear affectionately, and Sehun let him.

“Unless there’s a fishing boat passing by, there’s no way anyone could see us,” Sehun replied, glancing at the one way entrance, with rows of shaded bushes. 

Junmyeon cleared his throat. “Are you hungry? It’s nearly lunchtime. Let’s get our things sorted and head to that restaurant the owner talked about.”

"I am, let's go."

And so they entered the villa to put all their food in the fridge so they won’t be spoiled, while Junmyeon changed into something light and airy since the day was getting warmer, and Sehun had shed off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves. Fortunately, they brought their sport shoes, so they changed from slippers to it because the road was pretty rough and stoney around the mountain.

They locked the door behind them and walked a couple of metres towards the parking lot when they met the assistant again.

“Hi,” Junmyeon smiled behind his mask and held up his hand. The assistant stopped what he was doing and bowed a little. “Sorry to bother, can you show us where’s the nearest restaurant around this site?”

The assistant looked at between the two men. “Yes, it’s ten minutes drive away from the front road. Just go straight and turn left, you will see it.” Then he took out a key. “If you want, you can take the cart. No one is using them anyway and you don’t need to find a parking spot for it.”

Sehun stepped forward in excitement. “Thank you! Can we?” They usually got to ride the cart, but it’s seldom they got to drive it around.

The assistant nodded. “Sure, just put it back here after you use it, no problem.”

When the assistant handed Junmyeon the key, Sehun tried to take it away, but Junmyeon was fast and nimble enough to dodge him, laughing. 

“The first one to reach there gets to drive it first!” Sehun yelled, and sprinted to where the buggy cart was parked, and Junmyeon ran along, trying to beat Sehun. But Sehun had a head start and victoriously hopped into the cart, pumping his hands in the air, not a single out of breath while grinning widely. 

“That’s not fair!” 

Sehun ignored him. “Now, the key, hyung. Give me the key.” Sehun made a grabby hand and Junmyeon who had just arrived, let out a breath of tiny laughs as he put the key in Sehun’s palm. They both settled down and Sehun turned on the engine before directing the cart to the front entrance of the campsite, towards the road that the assistant mentioned.

The scenery along the road was beautiful from the summer hills and mountain peaks, with the occasional village houses, and they both let their minds wander. 

They reached the restaurant in exactly ten minutes. It’s a normal korean restaurant with a couple of friendly looking ahjumma and ahjussi who had run the place for the last ten years. Since the restaurant only had a couple of customers, they got to sit by the window with the wooden panel that overlooks the mountain. They ordered cold noodles because the sun wasn’t so friendly in the afternoon, and sweat spots appeared at the back of their shirts. They avoided alcohol for the time being and got a jug of ice-cold tea instead. 

When the food arrived, they took pictures of it, and then posed for a few candid pictures of them eating. 

“The cold noodles here are very delicious,” Junmyeon commented, and Sehun nodded in agreement, mouth full. “We have to come back here.”

“Should we recommend it to the others?” Sehun asked, but he already knew the answer.

Junmyeon looked down to his tea, a bit guilty. “No, I prefer to come back here, just the two of us.”

Sehun smiled, his feet found Junmyeon’s feet under the table and he rubbed the shin to comfort him. “You just read my mind. It will just be our little secret.” Then he leaned forward to whisper a secret. “Honestly, I don’t want the others to know either.”

After they paid their meals and prepared to leave, the ahjumma gave them a packet of spring rolls as a gift, and they happily thanked her. Sehun still insisted to drive the cart all the way back to the campsite, and Junmyeon, full and warm, leaned his head on Sehun’s shoulder, and Sehun happily enjoyed the feel of short hair brushing against his cheek. 

Once they arrived and parked the cart, the assistant was nowhere to be found. So they left the key on the seat, and walked back to the villa and peeled off their sweaty clothes and took turns to shower, before deciding to head back out to the veranda deck. Sehun pushed the foldable picnic chair backwards so he could lie in it, and pulled Junmyeon on top of him. Junmyeon carefully positioned himself along Sehun’s body, one leg thrown over Sehun’s thigh, before lying his head on Sehun’s shoulder, their fingers tangled together over his chest. 

"This is the best," Junmyeon sighed, dropping a light kiss on Sehun's skin where the shoulder and neck meet. "I got you all to myself for three days."

Sehun lazily stretched his free hand over his head and pressed a couple of kisses on top of Junmyeon's head. "I'm all yours for the weekend."

The evening wind was pleasant and the sound of the river was calming, and they fell asleep like that.

When they woke up, the sun began to set. Birds were chirping and the river turned reddish just like the color of the sky. Sehun was awake first, just enjoying the calming evening. He slipped a hand under Junmyeon’s shirt to rub his back, waiting for the elder to slowly wake up from his nap. Junmyeon blinked his eyes, still disoriented, and he stared at the sparkling river and the shadowed mountain with bleary-eyes, a small smile appeared on his lips.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” Sehun muttered, still rubbing his back and scratching the skin gently with his fingers. Junmyeon purred in bliss and nodded, his head was a familiar and pleasant weight on Sehun’s shoulder.

“How long have we been sleeping?” Junmyeon asked. 

Sehun shrugged. “I don’t know, an hour?”

Junmyeon groaned, and slowly pulled himself away from Sehun’s embrace, stretching his arms. He looked down to Sehun's phone on the table, and indeed, they just spent an hour and a half napping outside. He blatantly ignored the texts and emails notifications, knowing fully well that Sehun already told the managers and PR staff about him being on holiday. “That’s the most satisfying nap I’ve had in a while,” he confessed out loud, turning to look at Sehun.

“Me too,” Sehun said, his hand instinctively wrapped around Junmyeon’s wrist. “Come back here, I want a kiss.”

“We just woke up, I probably even drooled on you,” Junmyeon whined, though in his defense, there’s no wet patch on Sehun’s shirt. 

Sehun raised an eyebrow. “Do we ever care about things like that?”

Junmyeon’s shoulders slumped and Sehun knew he had won. “No,” and leaned back down to give Sehun exactly what he wanted.

When the night fell, lights began to turn up around the campsite, but not bright enough to let the visitors enjoy the quiet and stillness of a countryside nightlife. They met several other campers around the place, but since everyone mostly wear masks when they walk around, nobody has approached or recognized them. And their villa was far from the other campers, thus their privacy is more secure.

Sehun began to take out their food from the fridge so they could start cooking. At first they thought it would be easy as the villa provided a modern grill that can be turn on with gas, but unfortunately they both struggled when they were trying to lit up the fire, not knowing whether the gas was on or off. When a frustrated Sehun was about to give up and call for the assistant, Junmyeon, with a face full of sweats, finally managed to start the fire, and they both whooped simultaneously in childish excitement, high-fiving each other and jumped around. 

Sehun admitted he was pretty good at grilling and cooking (at least better than Junmyeon), and he took over cooking the meat and sausages while Junmyeon washed the vegetables, microwaved the instant rice, and set up the table. He also opened the packet of spring rolls they got from the ahjumma earlier. Occasionally, Sehun would let Junmyeon take over the grill as he popped open the bottle of wine they brought from home. 

“Wahh, this is so good,” Sehun exclaimed when they finally sat down to have their dinner. He tasted the meat and popped a piece of garlic into his mouth. “This is delicious, hyung.” He had been on a diet for the past month and hadn’t been able to let go of himself like this in a while. He looked across the table where Junmyeon picked up a piece of meat with his chopsticks.

“You cooked them so well, Sehunnie,” Junmyeon praised him, eyes big as he started eating too. He took some meat, a good amount of kimchi, a garlic, and wrapped them up into a lettuce before passing it to Sehun. Sehun opened his mouth as Junmyeon fed him. “It’s really good.”

“I know right? I’m surprised myself. I can brag about this later.” Sehun said, his eyes shining as Junmyeon chuckled at his childlike wonder. And that’s how they finished off the rest of their meal, trading food and feeding each other. Before long, Junmyeon started cleaning up the dishes, and used the bathroom and changed his clothes while Sehun sat outside, enjoying the view with a glass of wine.

“Hello,” 

Sehun startled from his musing when the assistant appeared at the walkthrough entrance, holding a bunch of things.

“Sorry to disturb you, but I’m here to send the mosquito coils and a lighter, the insects can be vicious in the summer.” He said as he handed a box to Sehun. He had changed his clothes from the black t-shirt he was wearing in the day to a long sleeve windbreaker. “Please be careful of the night air, since we’re near the mountain and the river, the wind can be quite sharp.”

“Oh, thank you,” Sehun bowed, grateful for the advice.

The assistant looked around. “The weather is nice today. If you need my help to build a campfire, you can call me from the phone in the villa,” he said before turning to leave.

Sehun gasped in surprise. So that’s why he could see two smokes from a near distance. Those could be the other camper’s fire. “Wait—”

Fifteen minutes later, Junmyeon came out, with a light blue shirt and a black sweatpants, looking baffled in wonderment. “What’s this?”

Sehun turned to him and grinned. “Look, a campfire.”

The assistant had helped him set up the fire a few feet away from the deck, near the side of the river. They also dragged a double picnic chair from the other side of the villa, and there’s two cans of beer and a mosquito coil on the ground, just beside the chair.

“Don’t tell me you did this all by yourself?” Junmyeon chuckled, hopped off the deck and walked towards Sehun. He looked glowing.

“No, I had help,” Sehun cleared his throat, picked up a beer and gave it to Junmyeon when the elder took a seat. “Here, enjoy yourself first, I’m going to be right back,” and he went back to clear out the table, packed up their leftovers, put aside the wine and tossed away his dirty clothes, before washing off the smoke scent from his face and hair. 

When he walked out, dressed in a simple white shirt and black shorts, he brought a blanket with him.

The sound of crackling fire was deafening. 

He watched the looming dark shadow on Junmyeon's back when he approached; seemingly like swallowing him whole. Sehun quickened his pace.

“Junmyeon-hyung,”

Junmyeon turned around immediately and smiled at him, his face lit up with one arm stretched towards Sehun, as if the little time they weren’t close was an agony to him. “Sehunnie,”

Sehun had to stop for a while to conserve the beautiful scene in his memory; Junmyeon sitting on the chair, leaning forward a little to warm up by the heat, the fire made the shadow dance over his handsome face, looking soft and cozy and beautiful— he’s so beautiful.

He’s glowing. He didn't look like he was about to be swallowed by the dark anymore. There’s light in his eyes, his presence, his soul.

And Junmyeon was watching Sehun like Sehun hold the world in his hands.

“Come sit with me,” Junmyeon beckoned him over, and Sehun’s feet moved by itself before he could realize what he was doing, gratifying towards Junmyeon’s side. He sat down and spread the blanket over Junmyeon’s lap. "It's really been a while since we had such a relaxing day.”

"And take a lot of naps." Sehun said. His schedule had been hectic throughout the year— his days had passed by in a rush of adrenaline from one job to another, and sleep had been the least of his concern. 

Junmyeon reached his finger to touch a part of Sehun's under eye. "You need more sleep, Sehunnie."

Through it all, Junmyeon had been the constant, the always. He had been staying permanently at Sehun's— their apartment since his enlistment, while helping to take care of Monsieur whenever he's free. And instead of coming home to an empty house, it was nice to come home to Junmyeon at the end of the day. 

Sehun looked into the distance, where he could see the darkness of the mountain, and was amazed by the twinkling stars in the night sky. It's hard to see such scenery in the busy city of Seoul. "This kind of life isn't that bad, huh."

Just the two of them, going off somewhere unknown, kissing in broad daylight, soft, soft— warm. Love. 

"It's not," Junmyeon muttered, smiling a little. "Not bad at all."

The silence stretched, and Sehun could almost sense the thoughts flooding in Junmyeon’s mind. So he pulled Junmyeon until the elder was snuggling to his side, and turned to look at him. "What are you thinking about?"

Junmyeon blinked at him, looking as if he was caught off-guard. “Not much— I’m just thinking, hypothetically, if we leave everything behind, and live an anonymous and peaceful life like this, it would not be so bad,” Junmyeon muttered, speaking from his experience of having a taste of the civilian life for the past few months. There’s no rush of schedules and haste by managers or PR team, just a routine, daily normal life. Junmyeon always said how he wasn’t a special person, just a normal person with a special job; and Sehun couldn't relate more. “— If it’s with you.”

Sehun hummed lightly, letting Junmyeon play with his own fingers to ease his anxiousness. “Do you want to leave everything behind and go off into the sunset with me?”

Laughing, Junmyeon turned to hide his face into Sehun’s collarbone, sighing loudly. “Sometimes— yes. Sometimes I think about that, but that’s selfish, isn’t it. It’s a selfish dream.”

“It’s not,” Sehun admitted. “Sometimes I feel like that too, especially when work and other things start to get overwhelming. I felt like I just wanted to pack our bags, take you and the dogs and just go somewhere.” 

They could dream. It's not selfish to dream.

“And go where?” Junmyeon whispered, indulging him. Sehun looked down to meet his eyes.

“Somewhere— where nobody knows us. Live a normal life for a change. Get a house where it’s quiet but near the town, and just live happily together.”

Junmyeon smiled, patting Sehun’s arm. “But?”

Sehun smiled back, feeling amused at how they could read each other’s mind . “But if I've given a second chance, I would still choose this path," he confessed.

Nodding, Junmyeon took his hand so they could lace their fingers. "Because of your dream to be a singer?" 

Sehun shook his head. Unlike Junmyeon, when he first came to the company, he didn’t have the dream; to be a singer, an idol— he just went with the flow of life and worked hard for it because that’s just how it was. But now, those things that he struggled to understand and learn before, has become his passion. He loves dancing, he loves singing, he loves acting, and he adores performing for people. It's hard to choose a different path, when their lives at the moment, was the best life they could have ask for. 

“I understand,” Junmyeon muttered; his short bangs fell upon his forehead— and suddenly Sehun missed Junmyeon's long hair just so he could play with them. "Even if I’ve given a second chance, I would never change a thing either. I love singing, I love acting, I love being on stage— we worked so hard for it. I love this job so much." Junmyeon sighed, long and relieved. "And besides, if I didn’t choose this path, I wouldn't have met you."

A life where they didn't meet each other? Sehun wondered what it would be like. Would it be the same, or an entire different life? Sehun knew there were certain characters and habits that they developed only because they're together— so would they be a different person if they never meet each other? 

A life where they never met each other. 

There's no Sehun in Junmyeon's life, and no Junmyeon in Sehun's life. 

Sehun stared at Junmyeon's face. 

"It doesn't matter."

"What do you mean?" Shoulders dropped, Junmyeon asked curiously. 

"It doesn't matter if we never met, or if we never choose this path. Because what's important is that, right now, we're here together, aren't we? Isn't that enough?" 

He couldn’t imagine what his world would be like without Junmyeon, without the members, and all the people he got to know now. 

Because it’s a non-existing world.

Junmyeon blinked, surprised a bit. He chewed on his bottom lips, staring at Sehun for a couple of beats, before he got up and put one hand over Sehun's thigh. "You're right," he whispered softly, closing in with half-lidded eyes. "You're absolutely right. It doesn't matter," his breath ghosted on Sehun's skin, sending chills over his back. "We're here, together. That's what's important. I'm happy enough," his eyes fluttered to Sehun's lips, smiling gently. "Are you?" 

Sehun smiled with fondness, and managed a reply before Junmyeon pressed their lips together. "The happiest," 

Junmyeon nibbled on Sehun's lips, biting it playfully, before Sehun pushed his tongue inside. They kissed languidly, softly, trying to make it last as long as they could. They parted with little pecks, smiling gently, heartbeat in sync.

Sehun adjusted the blanket to cover them both, as Junmyeon went back to plastered himself on Sehun’s side, leaning his head on Sehun’s shoulder as he looked up at the sky to watch the stars. Sehun cracked open the can of beer and finished half of it, sighing at the buzzing the alcohol brought him. He stared at the fire crackling, listening to the sound of calming, rippling water of the river, and the mysterious sound that could only be heard in the mountain area. 

“Don’t go into the fire,”

Sehun turned to Junmyeon, raising a curious eyebrow. “What?”

Junmyeon moved under the blanket. “Isn’t that what you said before? Something like, if you keep staring at a fire for a long time, you’re drawn into it.” He said. “Just stay with me, don’t go to the fire.”

Something clenched in his heart, and Sehun put down his drink. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Junmyeon glanced at him drowsily, a small smile appeared as if he's relief to hear it, then nodded. “Okay,” he whispered, so soft that the sound of crackling fire almost buried his voice. “Good, I’m not going anywhere either.”

Sehun grinned. "We're drunk, aren't we." He said, though Junmyeon barely touch his beer.

"Wasted," Junmyeon agreed, standing up and wobbled a little, grabbing Sehun's arm. "Come on, let's go inside."

Contrary to popular belief, Sehun didn’t move out from his and Junmyeon's shared bedroom just because he was tired of Junmyeon's messy habit.

The idea of moving rooms was already long due. They had noticed the spare room that their old manager used to occupy had been gathering dust, and Sehun voluntarily decided to use the room, and teasingly said how he wanted to break his destiny of always sharing room with Junmyeon. Junmyeon wasn't actually as sad as he made it to be, but it annoyed him to no end that "Sehunnie is getting bored of me" and sulked at the corner of the couch, staring at the television screen with a pouty mouth. 

Jongin had clicked his tongue at Sehun and told him to console Junmyeon-hyung before going out to the gym. Sehun just gawked on his trail, feeling betrayed about how Jongin picked Junmyeon's side instead of him. 

He did try to persuade Junmyeon, crawling on the elder boy's lap, taking his face in his palms. He explained how their things were full to bursting from the old room, and they needed to at least separate their stuff so they didn't end up wearing each other's pants, and Junmyeon had protested he liked some of Sehun's pants. Sehun had to stop and take a deep breath because Junmyeon was missing the point and testing his patience. Sehun had been in love with this hyung for a long time, and Junmyeon wasn't aware of it, not yet. 

He couldn't hide it anymore.

"Fine," he sighed. "I'm actually going to keep this as a surprise, but you're so stubborn so I'm just going to show you."

Junmyeon frowned, alarmed. "What is it?" 

Sehun stood up, taking Junmyeon's hand. "Let's go, take your jacket."

A bit confused, Junmyeon followed his words, picked up a jacket and his phone, and they took the elevator down to the basement carpark. They climbed into Sehun's car wordlessly, then without turning on the GPS, Sehun drove into the road, heading towards Apgujeong. When the car turned into a one-way street, they arrived at a familiar looking 6-floor grey-colored building. Sehun parked the car at a guest spot and got out, and Junmyeon followed suit. 

"This way," Sehun walked to the elevator, and they went inside as Sehun punched the code for the top floor. 

Standing in front of a door, Sehun pressed in another password, and gestured to Junmyeon to enter first. 

The entrance has a built-in shoe cabinet with a big mirror, and upon walking up, there's a right corner leading towards a spacious living room with a long row of window glass walls, overlooking the balcony and the city, but still hidden enough to maintain the private aspect of the place. There's a dining area with a decent-sized kitchen, complete with white-colored cabinets with a built-in stove, microwave and oven, and a sleek-looking refrigerator. The whole house was made in a traditional manner with the wooden floor and wooden beams, but with a modern twist.  

But it's surprisingly empty, as if the whole place was still new.

"What's this?" Junmyeon asked, frowning for a moment, before he suddenly realized something. "No way, Sehunnie! Is this—" he turned around, his face bursting in excitement. 

Sehun grinned at him. "I bought it," he said, bouncing on his balls of feet. "I bought the house! I'm a home-owner now!" 

A couple of months ago, they had talked about houses and properties, and this house had come up a few times when they were leafing through the list of houses for sale. They had both admired the warm and cozy atmosphere of the house, especially with the wooden structure that suits Sehun's personality. 

"Sehunnie! That's amazing!" Junmyeon jumped and threw his arms around Sehun, laughing happily. Sehun returned the hug with the same enthusiasm. They twirled in the middle of the empty living room. "This is so exciting! I'm so proud of you! No wonder you want to move out of the room from the dorm—"

"Well, I wanted to surprise you when the place is all cleaned up, but you sulk too much and I have to ruin the surprise," Sehun pulled back, lowering his head and pouting, which made Junmyeon cooed at him.

"I honestly just thought you're getting bored of me," Junmyeon looked down to his feet. "I know we have been roommates for years, but since we're starting getting individual schedules, sometimes being roommates was the only way I could see you at the end of the day. And now you don't even want to sleep with me anymore—" 

Sehun shook his head. "Who said I don't want to sleep with you anymore?" he asked. "I just think we should at least clean up the stuff from our room and put them separately in the spare bedroom so we can at least see the floor. We can still sleep together. And you know how sometimes I come home drunk as shit. If we have the spare bedroom at least I can sleep there whenever I'm drunk and I don't have to bother you."

Junmyeon blinked at him, seemingly disappointed. "Huh. The reason is more innocent than I thought."

"What is that supposed to mean?!" 

Junmyeon chuckled, reaching up to rub Sehun's ear fondly as a mean to apologize. His eyes wandered around the house. "Come on, show me the place."

Sehun gave him a tour of the house, and Junmyeon "oh"-ed and "ah"-ed at some features of the house that he didn't know from reading the listing. The floor could be heated in the winter, and there's two walk-in wardrobes in two separate rooms, with a jacuzzi fit for two in the master bathroom. 

"And this— will be your room," Sehun waltzed into the second biggest bedroom, followed by Junmyeon. "— and before you say anything, this is a room for your things. We can still sleep in the same bed in my room." Sehun blushed at Junmyeon's shiny eyes. 

"Ah, my Sehunnie all grown up and giving his hyung a room in his own house," Junmyeon faked a sob, wiping the corner of his eyes with his sleeve. "I am so proud of you."

Sehun rolled his eyes. "You have your own apartment too, but unfortunately you left it bare and only send your mom there to check on it a few times a month because you never stay there." He crossed his arms. "Why do you like to stay at the dorm so much?" 

Junmyeon shrugged, glancing at the window. "I don't actually like it; you remember the burst pipe in the bathroom a few years ago that almost flooded the dorm? Yeah, that's not fun."

"But you're always there," Sehun replied, frowning. 

"Someone has to keep the dorm, isn't it? We still use it whenever we are too tired to go back home because it's so near to the studio, and Jongin still haven't decided to move out." Junmyeon paused, thinking. "I might move out one day, who knows. But I still want to stay in that dorm for as long as I can. Isn't it lonely, letting the dorm be empty? I feel like even if all of us are changing, that dorm remains a constant, you know? All the things the members left behind, the knick knacks, the dent— everything in that dorm remained the same and humble. Even if everything is changing— now or the future— I hope all of you remember that you will still have me who is a constant, someone who you can rely on."

Sehun bit the inside of his lips, holding himself back from saying that Junmyeon should rely on them too, instead of keeping everything to himself. "You should be more selfish," he said without any heat. 

Junmyeon chuckled as he walked out of the room. "I'd say the same to you too, Sehunnie." 

Sehun woke up first, from the ray of sunlight coming from the skylight of the villa, pouring into the room. He groaned and shielded his vision, before looking down to where he had his face smushed deep under Junmyeon's armpit. Sehun adjusted his position so Junmyeon would be under his chin instead, holding the back of Junmyeon's head as he dropped a lazy kiss on top of his head. 

As if feeling the kiss, Junmyeon slowly came to wake and blinked his eyes sleepily, and Sehun felt his eyelashes brushing against his collarbone. 

"Good morning," Sehun whispered, his voice still hoarse from sleep as he snuggled more into Junmyeon's arms. It was warm, too warm in fact, but it's too comfortable to move. 

"Good morning, sweetheart." Junmyeon whispered back, humming pleasantly as he reached up to kiss Sehun's stubbled jaw.

That day, they already had a plan to do some trekking up the mountain. Apparently they didn't need a guide as it has a well-maintained hiking trail and signboard so they wouldn't get lost. The area also has a strong phone signal so they could also just call the campsite if they have any emergency. 

After washing up and getting ready, they went out to get some light breakfast of toast and coffee from the campsite cafe at the main building, eating at the terrace garden overlooking the river. Some campers passed by— some ignored them and some said hello to them, but luckily they were too busy with their own activities that they didn’t pay attention to both Sehun and Junmyeon. It helped that they were both wearing face masks, caps and sunglasses. 

They both took pictures around the campsite; Junmyeon was ready with his outfit— a blue and white pair of Nike windrunner and a pair of Nike shoes— as he posed with the river and the mountain as the background. Junmyeon took pictures for Sehun too, and Junmyeon smiled with affection at how Sehun’s relaxed and casual stance appeared on the camera.

“What’s wrong?” Sehun asked, raising an eyebrow.

Junmyeon peeked from behind the phone. “You’re so handsome, Sehunnie.” He said.

It wasn’t a new compliment; and he had heard that people called him handsome thousands of times before, but it still made him blush when Junmyeon said it with such lovely eyes.

"So kind, so hardworking, so lovely and thoughtful; you're such a wonderful person, Sehunnie. I'm so proud to call you mine."

Sehun buried his face into Junmyeon's neck, feeling his heart aflame like his cheeks. "You're so embarassing, hyung."

Junmyeon laughed at him.

They moved to a more quiet and secluded area, holding hands, and came to a part of the river with an old dock and tall grass. They made sure the woods were strong before slowly walking up the dock. Junmyeon adjusted his phone on one of the wooden panels with a couple of stones, set it to burst, before pulling Sehun in front of the camera so they could take a picture together. The first and second pictures were just them standing side by side, smiling to the camera. Then Junmyeon slid his arms around Sehun’s torso and leaned on his shoulder casually while the camera shuttered for a third picture. Sehun put one arm around Junmyeon and turned so he could kiss his temple. Junmyeon smiled wider and tilted his head up, seeking for a kiss on the mouth while Sehun momentarily forgot the camera and obliged. They kissed each other as the camera kept on clicking, the soft wind rustling the grass and created the ripple effects on the river— picture perfect.

“I love you,” Sehun whispered into Junmyeon’s mouth, brushing their noses.

Junmyeon sighed, pliant and soft and wonderful in Sehun’s arms. “I love you too, so much.” 

And they stayed there in each other’s arms.

Around ten am, they went back to the villa to pack some light lunch and snacks and changed into shoes they wouldn’t mind getting muds on, and started their trail into the forest. The trail wasn’t hard and mostly flat, and since the weather had been nice for the last couple of days, the soil was dry and easy to walk on. They took their time trekking the path, making a couple of stops when they found some interesting looking plants or birds. The ranger had told them to beware of the possibility of monkeys around the area, but so far they haven’t encountered any. 

The road got tough when they’re hiking the mountain, as they helped to pull each other uphill. The air got a bit breezy the higher they went, and thankfully they were dressed warmly. They arrived at the peak around an hour and a half later, and from the top they could see the spread of beautiful greenery and blue. 

With high-spirit, they excitedly enjoyed the view and took as many pictures as they could, and laughed and joked around each other. There’s a rest stop with a roof and bench nearby, but they chose to sit on the flat rock that came with the perfect bird view of the countryside, and took out their lunch and drinks. 

During their ten years knowing each other, one must think they have known everything about each other and there’s nothing left to talk about. How wrong. There’s always something to talk about, and they still enjoyed talking with each other.

"Next time we go hiking, maybe you should bring your guitar and serenade me," Sehun suddenly suggested, leaning back on his elbows as he grinned at Junmyeon. 

Junmyeon snorted. "And who would carry it? You don't even want to carry this bag," he made a show of patting the said bag he brought that contained all their hiking necessities. 

"You should carry it, you're the hyung." Sehun said, fluttering his eyelashes 

"I'm the hyung when it is convenient to you, huh? You brat." Junmyeon reached to pull his ear lightly, scrunching his nose for effect, and Sehun just yelped and playfully slapped Junmyeon's arm away. 

"No wonder there's not many people hiking today," Junmyeon sighed, trying to ignore the squelch of his wet shoes. 

"Why didn't we see the weather forecast today? How's your phone?" Sehun asked, as he safely tucked his phone into his inner pocket where it's dry. 

"It's in the bag pack. Thank goodness we bring a waterproof bag."

They were halfway hiking down the mountain, when trickles of rain started coming down. A little panicked, Sehun and Junmyeon quickly found a better trail that would lead them down the mountain faster, and started walking as fast as they could. The rain poured down heavily the moment they reached the foot of the mountain, and in their drenched state, they ran towards the first building with a rooftop— the guard house. Now they both stood side by side, drenched from head to toe, shivering from the cold rain and mountain wind. 

"If we run across this field and not through the pathways, we can reach the villa in five minutes," Junmyeon suggested, pointing at the familiar roof at the distance. "We can't just stay here, the rain doesn't look like it will stop anytime soon."

It’s true. They got distracted up at the mountain that they didn’t notice the rolling of dark clouds that now covered the sky as far as the eyes could see.

Nodding in agreement, Sehun made sure they both kept their phone safe from the water, and held Junmyeon's hand. On the count of three, they both started running into the rain. Their feet left a trail of footsteps behind them, as they ran across the field, ignoring the mud sticking at the bottom of their shoes and pants. Sehun didn’t let go of Junmyeon’s hand until they finally ran through the walkaway entrance of their villa, stepping into the verandah. 

Catching their breath, they took one look at each other and burst laughing. They both were drenched from head to toe; Sehun’s long hair was getting into his eyes and ears, and Junmyeon’s hair was spiked and messy from how he had run his hands through it many times. 

“I’ll go run the bath,” Junmyeon said, after wiping the corner of his eyes, the laughter still lingered. “And let’s not get the room wet.” He toed his dirty shoes away.

Sehun quickly peeled off his wet shirt and threw it on the picnic chair with a smack. Then his pants came off next. Rolling his eyes, Junmyeon followed suit until they both stood on the porch, stark naked.

“Hand me those clothes, I’ll arrange it.” Sehun took Junmyeon’s clothes from his hands and started arranging them in hope they would be dry by tomorrow morning, or else they had to find a plastic bag to carry their wet clothes. Junmyeon stepped into the villa and started running the bath, checking the temperature. He went to the kitchen corner and located some chocolates in the fridge and a half bottle of wine. Junmyeon put them on the edge of the bathtub, staring at the rushing water.

“Is it ready? It’s cold out there,” Sehun walked in, closing the door behind him with a shiver as he put both their phones on the nightstand. 

Junmyeon turned and nodded. He stepped into the bathtub and extended a hand towards Sehun. Sehun grasped it and dipped his leg into the tub, sighing at how the water warmed up his cold skin. He slowly sat down and leaned on the tiles, and Junmyeon made himself comfortable at the opposite side. Their feet were touching under the water, as they thoroughly cleaned up their hair and face with a new bar of soap they saw near the tub dish; too lazy to get up to the actual bathroom to retrieve their shampoo and body wash.

The rain poured heavily outside, and the steam from the bath fogged up the window glass. 

"Should we go on another getaway like this soon?" Junmyeon asked, closing his eyes after he was done washing off the soap.

Sehun nodded. "Hope the situation gets better. How about Busan? We haven't been there together for a while. Or Jeju? We can rent a villa near the beach." 

"That's a good idea, I haven't seen the ocean this year, except when I was doing the photoshoot near the beach for the album. But that's on low tide around that time, and I can barely see the water."

Junmyeon reached out to take the wine, drinking it straight from the bottle, before passing it to Sehun. Sehun noted the dark look in Junmyeon’s eyes when he tipped his head back, swallowing the drink. He slowly lowered the bottle and met his eyes, suddenly aware of how close and naked they were. The water wasn't murky, so they could also see everything under the steady ripples. 

It's almost funny how they were so comfortable with each other at that point. 

Sehun wrapped his fingers around Junmyeon's wrist, tugging him in. "Come here, love." The endearment came naturally to him even though he rarely used them. It was always Junmyeon the one that came up with affectionate terms, calling him with sweet nicknames. But Junmyeon didn’t seem to mind, moving from his spot towards Sehun, sitting between his legs with back leaning on Sehun's chest, a wonderful weight settled on Sehun's heart. They both smelled of rain and cheap bar soap, but there's a faint scent of coconut coming from Junmyeon's hair; and Sehun was in love.

"Are you tipsy yet?" Junmyeon asked, a stray of hair caught under his ear. Sehun moved it away with his lips. 

"This isn't enough to get me drunk," Sehun chuckled, tipping the bottle of wine again. He placed his free hand under Junmyeon's chin, and closed their mouths together. Aware of what Sehun wanted to do, Junmyeon opened his mouth willingly, and Sehun slid his tongue inside, the wine slipped past his lips. Junmyeon swallowed the passing wine loudly, moaning at the feeling of the alcohol sliding behind his throat.

When they parted, Junmyeon licked his lips, cheeks burning eyes hazy from lust. Sehun felt a sudden wave of possessiveness swallow him whole. 

Sehun picked up the chocolate, tore off the wrapper and broke the piece, alternating between feeding it to Junmyeon and eating it himself. Soon, the chocolate was gone, and Junmyeon had turned around so he could straddle Sehun's hips. They kissed languidly, Junmyeon sucking on Sehun's bottom lips, hands rubbing over his wide shoulders. Sehun let Junmyeon's hands wander down to his abs, fingers lining the curves slowly, spreading his fingers across the hips, while Sehun licked into Junmyeon's mouth. 

"Sit up here," Sehun huffed out, trying to pick Junmyeon up. Junmyeon put his hands on Sehun's shoulders and moved, sitting on the edge of the bathtub as instructed, spreading his legs so Sehun could kneel between them. Sehun caressed the inside of Junmyeon's thighs, licking his lips and watching the cock in front of him growing hard. 

Sehun closed his fingers around the cock, entranced by the dark color and flushed tip, noticing how the trail of hair was growing now that Junmyeon didn't wax for stage performances anymore. Junmyeon let out a shudder and a breathy whine, his cock throbbing in Sehun's fist. Sehun leaned down to lick around the head, avoiding the tip, tongue slowly following the prominent veins along the shaft.

"So gorgeous," Sehun whispered, pressing kisses at the side of the cock, sighing blissfully when it twitched in his hand after he deliberaetly puffed out warm air. Junmyeon groaned and balled his own palms over the bathtub, trying to hold himself back from letting his lust take control and just thrust into Sehun's mouth. "Absolutely gorgeous."

Before Junmyeon could say anything back, Sehun spit on his cock, slicking him up with his hand, and sinking his mouth into the length. He started to bob his head down, eyes turning up just so he could watch Junmyeon panting and heaving, his chest turned red and his nipples pebbled up. His abs contracted heavily, and Sehun thought about how he's the only one in the world who was able to get a front row seat of such a beautiful creature. Sehun picked up the speed with his mouth, long fingers fisting the base of the cock, as if milking him, while his tongue lapping at all the sensitive skin and sucking hard at the tip. Junmyeon gasped for his name, but Sehun was too far gone trying to break Junmyeon down and build him up again, that all he heard was the loud, wet suckling noise of spit and precum. Junmyeon tried to close his thighs from the intense feeling, only for Sehun to pick up one of his legs and hooked it over his shoulder; clenching his throat and slackened his jaw when the head reached far down and took delight in the way Junmyeon's surprised choke filled the room. 

"Sehunnie, Sehunnie, I can't—" Junmyeon's eyes glazed down, a hand coming up to grab Sehun's long hair. His chest was as red as his cheeks, and he moaned when he saw the stretch of Sehun's mouth on his dick. 

Sehun pulled off momentarily and smirked at him. "Come inside my mouth, hyung." And he went back to suck hard, making sure that he's licking at a particular hard vein underside the cock, where he knew Junmyeon was the most sensitive; and a moment later, warmth flooded his mouth. Sehun groaned deep from his chest as his mouth was filled with Junmyeon's come, and he swallowed them while continuing to fist him, bringing out most of his orgasm. 

Junmyeon was still shivering when Sehun let go of him with a pop. He licked at the string of cum around his lips, one hand reached down into the water, pumping his own cock while watching Junmyeon's expression, spent and blissed out.

"Junmyeon-hyung," Sehun whined softly. The elder took one look at him and pulled him by the arms, telling him to stand up. 

"My face— Come on my face," Junmyeon said with half-lidded eyes. Sehun quickly stood and directed his painfully hard cock towards Junmyeon's face, panting erratically as he pumped his fist faster and faster, until a rope of hot cum spurts out and caught over Junmyeon's eyelashes, cheek and lips, painting him prettily in white. Junmyeon closed his eyes and sighed, looking content and happy.

Sehun was aware of how he was still half hard after coming once; they haven't been able to do anything of sort because he was too busy, and Junmyeon was still trying to get used to his job and routine. He grabbed the towel beside the bathtub and gently wiped the cum from Junmyeon's face, before leaning down to kiss him. 

"The water is getting cold," Junmyeon complained. Sehun finally noticed it. 

"Oh, sorry. Let's get out of the tub, careful." Sehun held Junmyeon's hand and they quickly stepped out of the water together. Sehun found a new towel to wrap Junmyeon in, and another towel to dry himself up. Once Junmyeon felt warm again, he crowded into Sehun's space and pulled him down for a sloppy make out. Sehun dropped his towel to the floor, putting his hands over Junmyeon's hips, kneading the skin like a kitten. 

Junmyeon pushed him into the bed. "Turn around for me," he commanded, and Sehun happily obliged, turning on his stomach and willingly opened his legs a bit, ignoring his hardened cock trapped between his stomach and the mattress. Junmyeon climbed into the bed, slowly running his fingers down Sehun's spine, until he reached the two globes of Sehun's ass. Junmyeon leaned down to kiss the cheeks each, squeezing it lightly, and settled on the mattress as he continued lavishing the skin with his lips. After he felt that Sehun was getting more relaxed and pliant under his hands, Junmyeon spread the cheeks with his palms, and licked over the puckered hole. 

Sehun let out a startled whine, burying his face into the pillow as he felt Junmyeon's tongue circling his hole in kitten licks, making the skin nice and wet.

"Is this okay?" Junmyeon muttered, rubbing Sehun's thigh to comfort him. Sehun nodded and pulled up a leg wider to accommodate Junmyeon's ministration, a way to tell him that he was absolutely okay. He felt so wonderful, and loved, and basked in the attention and care, knowing well that Junmyeon's head would be filled with nothing but Sehun's taste, Sehun's scent, Sehun's warmth— and Sehun was pleased to let his own cock grew fuller and smearing the sheet with his precum. 

"Beautiful, my Sehunnie." Junmyeon rambled on. "You're so good for me. Perfect, beautiful, mine. All mine."

Sehun wanted to spend forever making Junmyeon praise him into the high heavens. 

Junmyeon pressed his tongue pass the rim after getting it shiny wet, and licked inside until Sehun was fisting the bedsheet. He pointed his tongue and started fucking the hole, teasing the pinkish skin around it. Sehun whimpered loudly, loving the feeling of the building orgasm, willingly letting Junmyeon fucked in deeper to bring him to the edge.

But no, as much as he loved it, he didn't want to come like this. 

He reached behind until he found Junmyeon's head, pushing him off. "Wait, don't want to come yet." He huffed out, taking a deep breath. Junmyeon immediately stopped, wiping the spit from his chin as he watched Sehun stilled to collect himself, and turned around so he was lying on his back, his cock heavy on his stomach.

"You okay?" Junmyeon patted Sehun's knee, and Sehun nodded. He got a better idea on how to get both of them off.

"Yeah, come here." Sehun opened his arms, and Junmyeon crawled over his body, dipped down so they could kiss and be entangled together. Grabbing Junmyeon's back, he slowly turned them around on the bed until he was on top of Junmyeon. He ducked to press kisses on Junmyeon's neck, sucking on his throat and worrying the skin with his tongue. His hands wandered down to Junmyeon's nipples, caressing the bud with a thumb and flicking it to make Junmyeon arched up. A free hand trailed downwards, past his navel, and stayed there. Sehun stroked the soft skin while distracting Junmyeon with a blossoming hickey on his neck, before gently pressing down. 

Junmyeon's eyes widened, gasping when he felt Sehun pressed harder. 

"Are you— Do you want to—" Junmyeon stuttered, his eyes fluttering close. 

Sehun stopped kissing his neck, stilled his hand and looked up. Junmyeon opened his eyes and they stared at each other. "Hyung, can I?" He pleaded, making moon eyes at his lover. 

Junmyeon swallowed loudly. His cock started leaking at the thought of what Sehun wanted to do. "It has been a while…" 

"Since my birthday," Sehun added, pinching on Junmyeon's nipple, and the elder twisted in bed, trying to get away but Sehun held him down. "I won't do it if you don't want to. There's a condom in my bag."

Junmyeon reached up to hold Sehun's face, smiling at him. "You miss me that much?" 

Sehun blushed, slowly nodding. "I do, I am." 

Junmyeon kissed him on the lips. "Me too." He bent a knee, brushing against Sehun's hip. "I'm ready."

Sehun kissed him back, then got up from the bed and went to his overnight bag to rummage through his stuff. He came back with a small bottle. "Come here," Sehun nudged his legs. "Let me prepare you."

Sehun took his time with Junmyeon, stretching him with long, wet and gentle fingers, drinking on Junmyeon's reaction and addictive noises. He started with one finger, letting the elder get used to the feeling of having something inside him after so long. Then two, scissoring him for a long time while adding a couple more purple bruises on Junmyeon's neck and collarbone. And later on he coated his fingers with more lube, and had three fingers deep inside Junmyeon, his middle finger brushing against the bundle of nerves. Sehun watched with lustful eyes as Junmyeon writhed against the sheet, biting his knuckles, cock flushed and leaking, begging to be touched.

Pulling out his fingers, Sehun quickly wiped his sticky hand on the bed sheet, bracing his elbows on each side of Junmyeon's head. He grabbed a free pillow and put it under Junmyeon's hips to position him better. Then he moved his hand to hold his dick, and slowly pushed inside. Junmyeon closed his eyes and relaxed himself to allow Sehun to go deeper, and when the younger finally bottomed out, Junmyeon tapped his hand. 

"You can move now," he breathed out, shuddering when Sehun bent down to kiss him on the forehead. 

Sehun whispered a short "love you," before he started moving, pulling back and pushed in one fluid motion, the pillow helping to angle his aim. He built the speed of his thrusts, minding Junmyeon's head from hitting the headboard. Junmyeon tilted his hips, begging for Sehun to fuck deeper, moaning desperately with open wanton. Sehun breathed heavily, not quite getting the result he wanted, and leaned back on his feet and knees, grabbing Junmyeon's hips. The changed position made Junmyeon wail, throwing his head back in pleasure when Sehun's cock reached deeper up to his navel. Sehun quickly reached for bundle up the blanket and shoved them over Junmyeon's head to cushion his trashing. 

Seeing Junmyeon's reaction made him smirk inwardly. Sehun was aware of how well-endowed he was under the belt, which is why it was possible to do this. 

Sehun continued fucking his lover deep into the mattress, his eyes transfixed by Junmyeon's pretty cock swaying over his stomach, leaking strings of precums all over his pale skin. Junmyeon could have fist his own cock to bring his release, but they agreed to always left it alone whenever they decided to fuck like this, so Junmyeon had to grab hold of something else to keep his hands busy; and right now he was gripping the blanket above his head until his knuckles turned white. The elder boy was a beautiful mess, gasping and moaning under Sehun, his chest slicked with sweat and his face flushed with arousal as Sehun's cock brushed over his prostate.

Then Sehun pulled Junmyeon's hips at the same time he pushed in, and groaned when he saw the slight movement on Junmyeon's belly. 

"Oh, love." Sehun fucked in again, and the slight swell appeared again. Sehun felt goosebumps on his arms, thrilled and so, so turned on at that point that he had to let his mind wander for a moment before he could come right there and then. 

It's overwhelming; the feeling of being so intimate and connected with the person you love most. 

He let go of Junmyeon's hips, one hand reached up to twist his nipple, then moved down to gripped his waist and brushed the soft skin below the belly with his thumb. Sehun rammed back and forth, balls deep into Junmyeon's ass, and delighted at the small bump outlining the head of his dick whenever he pressed his thumb. "Look at that, so hot. You're taking me so well, Junmyeon."

Junmyeon's glassy eyes cast down to his own belly, moaning when he saw his skin bulge a tiny bit when Sehun thrusted in hard. "Oh god, Sehunnie, please—" The bed creaked under him, and Junmyeon wrapped his legs around Sehun's waist to urge his lover to fucked him open, make a mess of him, clenching down on Sehun's cock. "More, please, please—" 

Sehun was weak against those pleas. He held on to Junmyeon's waist with both his hands, and picked up a brutal pace, ramming his cock into his lover. Junmyeon screamed when the dick hit him directly on the prostate over and over again, his back taut in a pretty bow, and his hands scrambled to find purchase on Sehun's arms. "Baby, baby, please, let me come, please—" he cried, eyes rolling at the back of his head. 

Sehun leaned down, sweat dripping from the side of his temple, pulling at the nipple with his teeth and made Junmyeon sobbed into the pillow. "Come for me, love."

And then Junmyeon was coming untouched, spilling over his chest and stomach with a loud moan. Sehun basked in how his lover glowed under the light, beautiful in the way he was covered in his own cum and sweat, mouth hanging open while trying to catch his breath. 

Sehun haven't stop thrusting even when Junmyeon was coming, in fact he pushed his thumbs down harder as he fucked hard and fast, grunting at the feeling of his cock inside Junmyeon's body. Junmyeon winced and twisted in over sensitivity, his breath caught in his throat as he felt his prostate being abused once again. Junmyeon tried to call Sehun's name, fluttering his sore hole as Sehun kept moving, the sound of skin slapping echoed through the room. 

"Fuck," Sehun grunted, throwing his head back and grinding his cock deep inside Junmyeon, feeling the pleasure at the end of his fingertips. He couldn't possibly come without seeing his lover, so he gazed down at Junmyeon's flushed face. He was so, so close. "Junmyeon, my pretty Junmyeonnie—" he put his palm under Junmyeon's belly, the ghost feeling of his cock throbbing inside making him go wild, and after a couple of merciless thrusts, Sehun came hard, his hot load painting the inside of Junmyeon with white. At the same time, Junmyeon's cock twitched but nothing came out, and he started convulsing violently, dragging his nails over Sehun's arms. Shocked, Sehun stared with unblinking eyes as Junmyeon groaned, openly sobbing with tears streaming down his cheeks. 

Sehun quickly leaned down, holding Junmyeon's face so they could look at each other. He wiped the tears with his thumbs, kissing him all over the face. "Junmyeon, Junmyeon, are you okay, can you hear me?" 

A moment passed, and Junmyeon swallowed loudly and nodded once, his breathing regulated, and he opened his eyes slowly. "Sehunnie—" 

"Oh god, Junmyeon, fuck—" Sehun kissed him on the lips. "You just— did you just come dry?" 

Junmyeon groaned and tried to hide his blushing face into the pillow. 

"No, no, it's okay, it's hot," Sehun smiled a bit and laid gentle, loving kisses on Junmyeon's face again, holding him close as if Sehun was cradling something precious. "You're amazing, thank you." He kissed the tears away. "I love you so much."

Junmyeon was completely spent and exhausted, but he still managed to smile back and pushed a stray of long hair behind Sehun's ear. "I love you too."

Slowly, Sehun pulled out from Junmyeon, feeling his cum dripped a little. He got up from the bed, looking down at the mess they made, suddenly embarrassed at how they both acted like a couple of horny teenagers even after being together (officially) for four years. Sehun padded over to the bathroom to get a wet towel so they could clean up the lube and cum, stripping off the ruined bed sheet and spread the wrinkled blanket over their naked bodies, sharing a single pillow. Junmyeon was out of it the moment he turned on his side, and Sehun made himself comfortable before letting the sound of Junmyeon's breathing lulled him to sleep.

&

Sehun woke up feeling refreshed and well-rested for the first time in months. 

He rubbed his heavy eyelids, frowning as he was suddenly aware of the blinding sunlight from the skylight. Groaning heavily, he pulled himself from the burrito of blanket and rolled on his back, stretching his hand to reach at the other side of the bed. 

It was cold and empty at the other side, but there's something heavy on his chest. 

He opened his eyes only to be greeted by Junmyeon, with his tousled short hair, milky skin dotted with red marks and purple bruises, and drooling on Sehun's chest, dead to the world with an arm thrown over Sehun's waist. He looked absolutely beautiful.

Sehun chuckled lightly, but immediately stopped when Junmyeon stirred in his sleep. He froze for a while, and let out a sigh of relief when Junmyeon didn't wake up and continued sleeping. 

Sehun pressed a kiss on top of his head, before reaching out to grab his phone. It was nine am in the morning, and there's two new messages from his manager about his schedule for tomorrow now that his holiday is coming to an end. 

He put his phone down at the side of his pillow, threading his hand into Junmyeon's hair and willed himself to sleep again, not ready to come out of this lovely world where there's only the two of them. 

When he woke up again, an hour had passed, and it was getting warmer in the villa. 

Sehun rubbed his eyes with his palms, aware of the missing weight on his chest, and turned to look at his side. 

As expected, Junmyeon was already awake, sitting with his head on his knees, the blanket covering half of his legs, as the sun shine down at him from the skylight, bathing him in the light of gold. And his lover— fiancé— Sehun corrected himself when he spotted the familiar silver band around Junmyeon's middle finger, the ring Sehun used to proposed back in the beginning of the year— was watching him with a tender, sleepy smile grazing his lips. 

"Good morning," Sehun greeted first, pulling Junmyeon back from whatever daydreaming he was in. "How are you feeling? Is there something on my face?" Sehun smiled back, wiping the corner of his lips with the back of his hand. 

Junmyeon shook his head, not feeling ashamed of being caught admiring Sehun. "Sore, but it's nothing unusual, I'm okay," he said with a soft voice, a hand reaching up to run his fingers along Sehun's long hair. "You just look so beautiful."

Ah, Sehun realized. 

He took Junmyeon's hand and intertwined their fingers together, their matching silver rings clink like the sound of bells. 

Having the same feelings as your partner. The same minds, the same hearts—

Guess that's just what love is.

End.