standardhumanbean



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  1. Public Bookmark 91

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    Roy Mustang goes out to investigate an explosion, and what he finds is himself. Specifically, his seventeen year old self, shaken and terrified and somehow jumped forwards in time by twelve whole years. How time-travel is even possible evades him, but he knows they need to find a way to send the younger version of Roy back to his own time.

    Edward joins the efforts, lending his mind to the problem - but what Ed finds is a sweet kid so in touch with his emotions that he cries all the time and stands up for what's right even at great danger to himself. In other words, the complete opposite of the Bastard Colonel.

    As they all work together to send Roy back to the past they inevitably become closer, what starts as friendship turns to more, and questions about who Colonel Mustang is finally let Ed see his CO in a new light.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    143,442
    Chapters:
    20/20
    Comments:
    253
    Kudos:
    349
    Bookmarks:
    91
    Hits:
    8,949

    21 Mar 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Originally posted at FanFiction.net, being reposted with edits and retouchings (BECAUSE IT'S BEEN LIKE 10 YEARS).

    Edward Elric is put on what he believes to be his stupidest mission yet: Babysitting a "Wizard." Everyone else calls it undercover work. To him, it's babysitting. But there's a lot more to this assignment than what's on file. And the more time passes, the more shit hits the fan.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    147,425
    Chapters:
    28/?
    Comments:
    110
    Kudos:
    1,039
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    287
    Hits:
    30,621

    05 Aug 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Mustang stopped Dumbledore with an extended hand, “You seem awfully concerned Headmaster. Considering, this has nothing to do with you.”

    Dumbledore leveled him with an inscrutable stare, “I’m not sure I understand what you're asking, Professor.”

    Mustang froze for a total of fifty seconds. Then he spoke, “Does this bring you some sort of satisfaction? Relieve compunction?" Mustang pursed his lips, brow contouring a face overburdened by contemplation, "I've found at times that taking the whole world onto your shoulders is the only way to make one’s own burdens feel more bearable. To find a… balance. So, what I'm asking? Is that what this is to you, Headmaster? Balance?"

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,873
    Chapters:
    9/?
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    1
    Comments:
    133
    Kudos:
    475
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    127
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    9,598

    31 Jul 2025

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    They're still not sure exactly how they ended up on the magic side of a place called London, but Edward and Roy are not new to dealing with the unexpected.
    Needing to find a way back to Amestris, back to their own time, together they figure out how magic energy works, and how it can work for them specifically and in the end, the decision to go to Hogwarts is a mutual one. Edward will have to go to high school and Roy will have to get used to using a wand.
    Neither of them are prepared for what they find at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry.
    There are secrets, liars, murderers and too many people with very dangerous agendas, no one seems trustworthy, so naturally they should stick together...
    ...but then Ed starts lying to Roy.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    201,937
    Chapters:
    21/?
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    485
    Kudos:
    1,232
    Bookmarks:
    348
    Hits:
    37,470

    25 Jul 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Six years on from the Promised day, and life is plodding along as it always does. When Ed gets caught in another Human Transmutation circle after chasing a corrupt alchemist down in the depths of Central, he resigns himself to being fucked over.

    Good thing Mustang has a Gate to spare.
    ---

    After the return of Voldemort and the death of Sirius Black, Albus Dumbledore is having a very long year, and would just like to return to his office for a nap or two. Preferably before anything else catches on fire.

    Truth is having none of that nonsense.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,301
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    179
    Kudos:
    901
    Bookmarks:
    240
    Hits:
    14,135

    20 Jul 2025