planetlikevenus



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Harris: Hi, Shane!
    Harris: This is Harris Drover.
    Harris: I got your number from Ilya.
    Harris: Sorry to bother you, but I had a question.
    Harris: I know you’re coming in to sign contracts tomorrow, and I had an idea for a social media thing to announce your signing, if you’d be up for it?

    Shane: Oh, yeah, okay.
    Shane: I’ll be there, so we can do whatever.
    Shane: Always happy to help the team with a little internet humiliation that’ll be around for decades.

    Harris: Perfect!
    Harris: I promise, I think you’ll really like this, though.
    Harris: No humiliation involved.
    Harris: The only caveat is, you can’t tell Ilya.

    Shane: Okay?
    Shane: Why?

    Harris: Well.
    Harris: Here’s what I’m thinking.

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    30 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    In preparation for their second team game of Never Have I Ever with Ilya Rozanov, newly married with his husband in attendance, the Ottawa Centaurs prepared a curated list of kinks in advance.

    Little do they know there’s a dark horse among them.

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    29 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “Wait, I could totally see that,” Connors says. “She wears reading glasses and he’s, like, obsessed with them. Sometimes on the road, he calls her from the bathroom and I hear him begging her to put them on.”

    “The glasses! I heard that too.” Shit, it must be a fetish, right? She doesn’t just happen to be old. Rozy likes that she’s old.

    Or: Cliff figures out why Ilya’s keeping his Montreal girl a secret. She’s not a girl at all...she's an elderly woman. Or maybe an elderly man?

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    29 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Marlow: UHHHH
    Connors: GOOD LORD
    Carmichael: WHAT THE HELL CAP?
    Ilya: Oops
    Ilya: Wrong chat
    Ilya: Obviously
    Ilya: You’re welcome though 😏

    Or: A handful of times Shane and Ilya accidentally send sexts to a group chat, +1 time they sext in a group chat on purpose

    Language:
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    29 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “Okay,” Ilya says. His thumb restarts its soothing. “Then say it all wrong, and I will understand anyway.”

    So Shane tries, reaches out and hopes for Ilya to reach back. “My first year with the Metros wasn’t… great. I mean, I played great hockey, but those first few years, the room wasn’t…"

    “Room wasn’t great,” Ilya repeats. “What does this mean? Not great like calling you slurs? Not great like hazing?”

    Shane stiffens, then forcibly relaxes. He tries to make his voice light, “A little, uh. A little of both, I guess.”

    OR

    Shane's metric for a normal locker room is skewed. Ilya (and the Centaurs) are happy to help.

    Language:
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    27 Jun 2026