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things just got a little out of hand by thesnapwasbrutal for blurple
Fandoms: Friends (TV)
27 Nov 2025
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Summary
“Yeah right,” Joey muttered, the humor fading as quick as it came. “I’d need to learn how to kiss a guy first.”
Chandler blinked, unsure what to do with that. His brain immediately went down the familiar sarcastic avenues, reaching for the punchline, but they all felt too sharp against the honesty in Joey’s tone. For a fleeting, ridiculous second, he wondered if Joey was hinting at something more, before immediately shutting that thought down. No way. It was Joey. Joey.
“Okay… so?” he said finally, leaning back against the couch, trying to keep his tone light. “What do you need from me? A pep talk? Fake boyfriend résumé?” He forced a small laugh. “A mint?”
He waited for Joey to laugh with him, to bounce the bit back, to give him that easy grin and make it safe again. But Joey didn’t. He just stood there, shifting from foot to foot, hands fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.
The silence stretched.
“Yeah…” Joey started, voice lower now, careful. “I was kinda hoping... you’d, you know... help me practice.”
Bookmarked by konata
25 Apr 2026
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“Want to play Twenty Questions?” asked Sabina.
Jane’s expression went through most of the stages of grief in the time it took her to whip out a hand and clap it across Sabina’s mouth. “We’re in a firefight!” she hissed.
“Wf wurg n uh fuftight,” said Sabina, from behind the hand. Nope, that wasn’t going to work. Thinking tactically, she licked Jane’s palm. Jane snatched her hand back in disgust.
“I said, we were in a firefight. What we’re in now is a closet. And I haven’t heard anything from outside for a quarter hour, so I’m pretty sure they’ve given up and gone to look for us somewhere else. So. Twenty Questions?”Bookmarked by konata
12 Apr 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
“Huh,” said Jane, hoisting her bulletproof vest into place again with only the slightest blush as she rearranged the strap. “Is this how I get you to be quiet and follow orders for a change?”
“One hundred percent,” said Sabina, who was absolutely never going to be quiet or follow orders again if this was the reaction it got her. -
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Summary
A short story about how Dulcie and Eddie get together after Cath goes back to Deadloch.
Bookmarked by konata
21 Mar 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
She woke to see Eddie staring at her still, and said, “We need to talk practicality.”
“Naw,” Eddie grinned and kissed her, “We need to talk about how fun it is to make you burst in my mouth like a pomegranate. Or like one of those jelly candy things that blow up on your face. And. We need to talk about bum stuff. And whether you think a dildo with two sort of prongs, you know, like two ends…” as she explained, Eddie mimicked devil horns with her hands then made them scissor for reasons unknown. “…you know, so you can fuck all holes at once…”
“Shhhh.” Dulcie held her close. “I love you too. Ok?”
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To Stretch A Summer Into A Lifetime by Reed_everyday
Fandoms: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Dirty Dancing (1987)
19 May 2026
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Summary
Pete Wentz has two responsibilities during his family vacation at the upstate mountain retreat: take care of his younger brother Joe, and find a respectable girlfriend to carry on the Wentz name. When he gets swept up in the scandals of the dance staff and their bossy, angel-faced leader, he starts to realize he might fail both tasks.
Bookmarked by konata
07 Feb 2026
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D'Arcy may have cold toes but that doesn't stop her from being Asta's ride or die girl.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,930
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 16
- Kudos:
- 109
- Bookmarks:
- 9
- Hits:
- 1,081
Bookmarked by konata
08 Jan 2026
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“Unh,” said McKay, and folded his arms under his face before flopping down again. The position pulled the sleeves of his scrubs top taut around his biceps. “If I hide here it’s harder for the interns to find me.”
Series
- Part 1 of Living Will
Bookmarked by konata
03 Nov 2025
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Lucy Breaks the Biscuit Rule by SciroccO (SciroccoOrion)
Fandoms: Lockwood & Co. - Jonathan Stroud, Lockwood & Co. (TV)
10 Oct 2024
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Summary
George has to put the pieces together after Lucy breaks the biscuit rule and neither she nor Lockwood will tell him why they aren't speaking.
Series
- Part 5 of An Agent Is Always Prepared
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 5,465
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 18
- Kudos:
- 47
- Bookmarks:
- 3
- Hits:
- 1,104
Bookmarked by konata
28 Jun 2025
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Summary
“You really haven't done this before?”
“Don't sound so surprised.” Pete frowns up at Patrick from where he’s laid out shirtless on the hotel room bed like some Victorian maiden. He does kinda feel like one.
“Well it's just, you've got that kind of,” Patrick waves his hand vaguely over Pete’s…everything.
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what it says on the tin. patrick takes pete’s bottoming virginity
Bookmarked by konata
19 May 2025
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Summary
Kayla hatches a plan to help Deborah and Ava reconcile. Jimmy tries to stop it from going off the rails, and doesn't really succeed. (Set after 4.05.)
Bookmarked by konata
03 May 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
They just need to take things to the next level and get some of that horned up energy out! Then they’ll be able to get along again, and the show will get even better, and you won’t have to be their stressed-out go-between and have all that trauma from your parents’ divorce bubbling up and making you all acid reflux-y. No more of that for my boy's widdle sternum." She pouts sympathetically at Jimmy's sternum. Jimmy covers his chest with his hands. There's such a thing as being too seen.
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Summary
pete and patrick hatefuck, but not really.
Bookmarked by konata
25 Apr 2025
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When an accident leaves John and Rodney stranded on a far-flung planet, Rodney gets a crash course in- among other things- cultural relativity, calligraphy, BDSM, and the care and feeding of heavily drugged Lieutenant Colonels.
Series
- Part 1 of Nice Place to Visit
Bookmarked by konata
03 Jan 2025
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Summary
Joe commits crime for fun and Andy does it for the thrill.
Pete doesn't know who he should be and Patrick just wants to stop jerking off in gas station bathrooms.
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What the hell is Patrick doing? He's a fucking car thief from the depths of the Illinois foster care system. How the hell did he end up in Oregon masterminding a combination hack job, three step con and a burglary that involves the phrase ‘solid state laser grid’?
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AKA, a Leverage-flavored AU, as a treat.
Bookmarked by konata
11 Dec 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
Someone wearing his skin has fucked librarians and professors and doctors, reporters and soldiers, lawyers and custodians. He hadn’t loved a single fucking one of them. Hell, Pete hadn’t even touched them at all, not really.
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Summary
all of a sudden Pete just feels like laughing, because it’s just so crazy that this is his life, so he does, letting it ripple through him like a wave. When he looks up, Patrick is gazing at him with this strange fond expression, like Pete is the best thing he’s ever seen.
or: Pete wants an escape. Patrick knows a place.
Bookmarked by konata
07 Dec 2024
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Not Quite Postcards from My Former Selves, But That's Just the Technology by turnpike_divides
Fandoms: Fall Out Boy
08 Jul 2020
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Summary
The vocalist leaned down to grab the phone and stared at it for a moment before asking, “what the fuck is this?”
Pete was both amused and embarrassed at the same time. “Apparently I set a reminder in my phone seven years ago to ask you about your sex life in seven—well, now.”
Bookmarked by konata
04 Dec 2024
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incredibly fluffy and silly christmas peterick sex <3
Bookmarked by konata
03 Dec 2024
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Patrick’s eyes are seaglass blue above him.
The rug against Pete’s bare back is scratchy. It’s made out of some shitty wicker that hurts to walk on and hurts to lay on. Pete told Joe just how shitty this stupid rug was but he insisted that finding it on the street was a steal and it “really tied the room together”. Sometimes he considers setting it on fire in his room.
Bookmarked by konata
01 Dec 2024
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Pete knows Patrick is teasing him, and he’s not hurt by it, really— there is a reason why he cut himself off during his weird body fluid composition talk, after all. But Patrick’s thumb is rubbing over the belt of his robe, just over his waist, and Pete kind of wants to follow that line of thought again, now that they’re in private (or as private as you can get on a hotel balcony) and not on stage in front of thousands of people.
A conversation about the Riffing with Patrick on stage at Woodlands.
Bookmarked by konata
28 Nov 2024
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Summary
pete really has to use the bathroom and patrick won’t let him :(
Bookmarked by konata
27 Nov 2024
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Summary
Set during the writing stage of So Much (For) Stardust.
Patrick is frustrated about a certain phrase being repeated in Pete’s lyrics. Pete just wants someone (Patrick) to hold him.
Bookmarked by konata
25 Nov 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
To Pete’s relief, his own messy scrawl still covers the pages, but there are notes from Patrick alongside them as well. Pete won't admit out loud that there's a warm, tingly zing that goes through his chest to see Patrick’s writing mixed with his words.
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Good boy. Just like the dog.
Bookmarked by konata
19 Nov 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
Patrick comes easy to Pete because he's never once shied away from being difficult to him. Even in the best of circumstances, when he's firing on all cylinders and his brain isn't at least half offline, reduced to a nice buzzing at the back of his skull, Pete is hard pressed to remember any time in the previous two decades when Patrick has ever just let things between them go without pushback, the chafe of their conflicting personalities a friction he trusts almost more than gravity holding him to the earth.