dandelionel



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    “You treat me like I’m made of glass, Shane. You act like I'm about to break, like I'm this close to ruining everything.” Ilya’s voice drops to a whisper. “It makes me feel like loving me is work.”

    Shane’s composure fractures. “Because I’m scared!" He drags a hand through his hair, breathing harder now. "And—and so are you! You don’t have to pretend you’re not, it’s fine to say it. I’m fucking scared, okay?”

    There it is. The soft underbelly. And Ilya sees it—the exposed place, the honesty, the fear—and instead of softening, something in him hardens. “Scared of me,” he says, already deciding that's what he heard.

    “No,” Shane says, immediately. “No, not of you. Just scared. Of this whole situation. Of not knowing what to do, or what to say. Of messing up." A beat. "Scared of losing you.”

    And it should be sweet, should land as devotion, but it just makes Ilya’s chest ache. His smile twists, bittersweet. “But maybe you’re already losing me. Have you thought of that?”

    Every day, there's less of me left, he wants to say.

    Loving Shane Hollander changes Ilya Rozanov's life, but it doesn't save it.

    It doesn’t have to.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    39,366
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
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    615
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    331
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    17 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    unconnected hollanov/heated rivalry fics all by the same author (it's me, i'm the author) // blanket permission for translations (posted on ao3/linked), podfics (posted on ao3/linked), art of any kind inspired by the fics in this collection! i would love to know about them though

    Words:
    365,179
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    14
    Bookmarks:
    4,445

    12 Apr 2026

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    The first thing you should know about time loops is that they’re really fucking hard to break. The second thing is that you can never break one in such a way that it is incapable of returning.

    The third thing you should know is that everyone around you has probably been stuck in a time loop at one point or another, and they made it out alive. This is only comforting if you’re a numbers guy, or if you’re the kind of guy who talks to others about how it feels to live the same day over and over and over and over and over and over again.

    Shame if you’re not; the most important thing you should know about breaking a time loop is that it helps to tell someone you’re trapped in one in the first place.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,873
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    1
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    12 Apr 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    In 2008, Shane Hollander lost to Ilya Rozanov. Fresh-faced, hungry. Like he’d been living off victory points that were scraps compared to the real thing, compared to beating Rozanov, the first man in the world to make him feel second-best. Back then, he’d thought that was the only thing he felt, too. That the electric pulse jostling between them in the gym some time later was a trick of the mind. It was like seeing sky above for the first time. See you at the draft. Life in that paper body.

    or: Ilya comes back. This is the crux of it.

    Language:
    English
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    7,436
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    897
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    3,019
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    1,234
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    58,003

    11 Apr 2026

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    Shane finds out on Twitter.

    Not from a lawyer or a teammate or even one of the journalists who've been calling nonstop since the FanMail video went viral. He finds out at 6:47 am, still in bed, that Russia is coming for Ilya. Propaganda charges. Passport revocation. Return to the Russian Federation required.

    What follows is weeks of watching everything fall apart. Ilya's career. Their safety. The system that was supposed to protect them. Shane keeps playing while Ilya can't. The lawyers file paperwork and say to wait. Montreal demands silence.

    Shane faces a choice: keep his head down and trust the process, or burn down his career and force the world to pay attention.

    He chooses fire.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,498
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    960
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    Bookmarks:
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    76,712

    31 Mar 2026