Procrastination_legion



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    A story about murder, the power of writing lists, the interest of the press, the politics of the Department of Magical Transportation and the struggle of being Percy Weasley.

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    15 Jun 2026

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    When Peter's Teacher announces that his Graduating Class's Senior Trip is going to be to Stark Industries, the place where Peter has an internship, and where he spends so much of his free time, he is... less than enthused. No one believes his Internship is real and frankly, he just doesn't want to deal with it, but between May and Mr. Stark, he doesn't really think he's going to get much of a choice.
    He's going to have to go
    At least Ned is excited about it.
    And hey, he has a month till the actual day, maybe he'll fall into a pit or get carried away by a stork-themed villain or fall into a Coma or something before the dreaded Field Trip

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    11 Jun 2026

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    The last thing Peter sees is Tony's horrified, heartbroken expression leaning over him. The guilt in his eyes is almost worse than the burning pain that's taking Peter apart piece by piece. The world starts to go dark.

    There's a flash of gold and green. For one moment, he finds himself standing amongst the Guardians and others. And then darkness again. It feels like blinking; an extended period of nothingness that ends as abruptly as it begins. One moment there’s nothing, the next there’s light.

    “Easy,” a woman says. Her words are gentle, and carry a slight accent that he can’t place. "I'm called Wonder Woman. What's your name?"

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    30 May 2026

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    “I have kids," Clint said. "I know dad behavior when I see it.”
    Tony blinked multiple consecutive times, processing the statement. “Excuse me?”
    “Tony,” Steve said now, “how long have you had a son? And how come we’ve never known about him?”
    “Yeah,” Clint spoke again, “I thought I was the only one with a secret family. Turns out you’ve had one longer than me!”
    -------
    Peter gets to spend all summer living in Avengers Tower with Tony. When the Rogue Avengers get pardoned and come back to live at the Tower too, they're confused as to who Peter is. However, once they see how Tony acts around Peter, that confusion goes away, as they know for certain who Peter must be - Tony's secret son.
    Tony and Peter decide to make the most of the situation, and play along. They hope they can keep up the act all summer. But they soon learn that they barely have to act at all.

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    28 May 2026

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    “That was a disaster. The press is having a field day.”
    “It wasn’t my fault,” Tony defends. “That Spider-Guy never knows when to shut up. He distracted me.”
    “Your reputation took a blow,” Pepper tells him. “Which will be fixed, of course. I’ve already set it up.”
    “Set what up? What, am I going to make flower arrangements with the elderly?”
    Pepper slides a piece of paper towards him. “Try an orphan. His name is Peter Parker. His biggest dream is to meet you. But…” She hesitates.
    “But?”
    “Apparently he doesn’t talk much. Sometimes not at all. Trauma-related.”
    “A smart kid who doesn’t talk? Perfect combination. If only all my employees were like that.”
    ---
    Or: Between Peter Parker barely speaking, and Spider-Man being the ultimate chatterbox, how was Tony ever supposed to figure out that they were one and the same person?

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    26 May 2026