ItchyBtchy
Fandoms
- The Umbrella Academy (TV) (3)
- Video Blogging RPF (2)
- Minecraft (Video Game) (2)
- Dream SMP (2)
Recent works
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Extra-Ordinary, That Little Miracle Book by ItchyBtchy
Fandoms: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
21 Aug 2025
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Summary
Five has had forty-five years to mull over Viktor's autobiography while stuck in the apocalypse.
His siblings had reacted to the book as expected. Anger, surprise, anger, surprise. But Five is the only one to read it with no context. It is a collection of memories that Five does not have, that he was not there to experience. In theory, he should be the most detached from it.
In actuality, the book affects Five more thoroughly than any of the others.
Armed with a wagon, a mannequin and one little book, Five survives for nearly fifty years in the burning remnants of earth. That little book completely shapes his experience in the apocalypse, and it becomes the key to bringing him home.
AKA: my take on Five's reaction to The Book™, which is something that seriously should be talked about more. Like I really think we moved on from The Book™ too quickly.
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Beginning of the End by ItchyBtchy
Fandoms: Dream SMP, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
30 Jun 2023
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Summary
After decades of war and conflict plucking him out of reach, Wilbur finally tracks down his old friend.
Series
- Part 2 of Amongst Gods
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Summary
"Yeah, well, you're one to talk about shitty powers." Ben's face contorts with offense, but Five continues before he can respond.
"My brother Ben–our Ben, the one I grew up with–his powers got him killed."
Ok. What.
Ben stares at him with some muted shock. The alcohol in him is uncomfortably warm.
"I mean, I wasn't even there when it happened but, according to my siblings, it was pretty bad." Five smiles ruefully. "The tentacles just …ripped him right apart." He takes another sip of his drink.
Or,
Five and Sparrow Ben have a conversation before the end of the world.
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a village in the distance by ItchyBtchy
Fandoms: Minecraft (Video Game), Dream SMP, Video Blogging RPF
21 Jul 2022
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Summary
"Are you unhappy, Techno?"
It's an easy question, maybe the easiest question in the whole English language. How are you? Are you okay? How do you feel?
Are you unhappy?
Technoblade is silent. He can't remember a single time he's answered that question with anything other than an "I'm alright." He also can't remember a single time he's answered truthfully, or a single time he's felt anything other than tired.
or
Technoblade and Wilbur are gods, traveling together across the mortal world. They share a heart to heart and Techno opens up, finally, for maybe the first time in his long life.
Series
- Part 1 of Amongst Gods
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Summary
"How come you never want to talk to us?"
Five looks up from his book, stretching slightly as he uncurls a bit to eye him from his position across from Diego. His eyes narrow. "I do talk to you." It's a short reply, as are all his replies, Diego thinks, crafted to end conversations rather than continue them.
"No, you talk back to us, but you never talk to us. Like, you never want to talk to us," Diego grumbles.
Five considers this for a moment, blinking at him, before he shrugs. "Huh. I guess I don't."
or,
Five spent 45 years alone in the apocalypse, the only living thing in a completely silent world. It's no surprise he doesn't start many conversations once he's back.
Recent series
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Summary
An AU in which everyone is a god of some sort. Inspired in part by Passerine.
- Words:
- 2,070
- Works:
- 2
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
“If you never time travelled, you never got caught up with the Handler, what would have happened?”
“I guess I would have grown up to be an emotionally stunted man-child like everybody else around here.”When Five goes to time travel, he’s stopped by an older version of himself who already made that mistake.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 274,479
- Chapters:
- 10/17
- Comments:
- 336
- Kudos:
- 1,388
- Bookmarks:
- 407
- Hits:
- 38,808
Bookmarked by ItchyBtchy
27 Nov 2020
Bookmarker's Tags:
Bookmarker's Notes
Chapter 7
FUCKKKK I LOVE THE FIRST HALFF
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Summary
In the weeks leading up to his disappearance, Five breaks his arm.
Bookmarked by ItchyBtchy
13 Jun 2026
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BdoubleO100 went to sleep. Sweet dreams!
The notification pops up, and Etho watches Tango look out the window at the newly-dawned sky.
“Okay,” Tango says, “when do we start getting worried?”
Bookmarked by ItchyBtchy
01 Feb 2026
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Summary
"You're sick again?"
Bookmarked by ItchyBtchy
01 Feb 2026
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Summary
“Thinking about it,” Bdubs murmurs into his hair, voice low and relaxed, “there was sex, and there was a backrub, but I don’t know if we ever actually got into sexy backrub territory.”
“This guy,” Etho gripes lightly. “What, you want a refund or something?”
—
Etho is temporarily blinded. Bdubs offers to help out while he recovers. They've been on-again-off-again friends with benefits for over a decade, so a couple of weeks living together while Etho’s out of action isn’t going to change anything between them.
Right?