Expensive_cat
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Summary
Religion! Horror! Exorcisms! Piercings! And Gerard is a priest.
Disclaimer: I stole frequently and unrepentantly from Joss Whedon and the makers of various horror movies throughout this whole series. Also I am not an expert on the Vatican or medical-type things, so please accept my apologies in advance for all the wild inaccuracies I am sure you are about to encounter. If everyone could just assume this is the Magical Made-Up Vatican, you know, like the religious institution version of those tour buses that drive themselves and don't carry anyone but the band, that would be awesome.
- Words:
- 186,764
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 3,705
Bookmarked by Expensive_cat
20 Jul 2026
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Summary
Inspired by this fake boyfriend ad. Spock decides to make his problems with Sarek worse by bringing home a punk human boyfriend his dad will hate.
Jim swears he can be that guy. But can he, when deep down he's just a stack of books with legs?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 64,392
- Chapters:
- 22/22
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,742
- Kudos:
- 2,156
- Bookmarks:
- 481
- Hits:
- 27,810
Bookmarked by Expensive_cat
13 Jun 2026
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My Fake Plastic Love by Anonymous
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
29 May 2026
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Summary
Ryland Grace had never liked being touched. It was gross, and intimate, and never on his terms.
It's ironic then, that it's only now that he's alone with no hope of ever touching a living thing again, that he wanted it.
He was really starting to hate irony. He'd like to get off this ride now.AKA an Aro/Ace Grace character study with a dash of Touch Starvation and becoming platonic life partners with your Alien best friend.
Series
- Part 1 of Subterranen Homesick Alien
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,312
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 13
- Kudos:
- 160
- Bookmarks:
- 45
- Hits:
- 817
Bookmarked by Expensive_cat
30 May 2026
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Summary
Keith told himself that he went to Castle of Lions Café for the obvious reason: it had the best coffee in town.
It definitely had nothing to do with the Incredibly Attractive Barista with rich brown skin and impossibly blue eyes currently standing opposite the counter from him.
Or so he told himself.
Bookmarked by Expensive_cat
14 Mar 2026
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Summary
"Lance had watched Keith Kogane win a bar fight with a broken hand, rip open a keg with a knife, and complete a whole wretched ensemble of activities you definitely shouldn’t do with a beer in hand.
And yet here he was, glittery Sharpie in hand, waiting to sign Lucy’s copy of Altea.
Lance opened his mouth to say something arguably rude and not appropriate for their current audience. Until he remembered that he himself had either watched or participated in these activities and was now holding a four-year-old containing his DNA. So Lance didn’t have much of a leg to stand on either."
When Lance runs into his ex-boyfriend at a children’s book signing, he not only finds out that Keith Kogane ages like fine wine, but he also apparently wrote his daughter’s favorite book. As Keith lingers in town, Lance frantically tries to keep his daughter from realizing that the writer is not only a person from Lance’s past, but a character in her bedtime stories as well.
Series
- Part 1 of The King and His Fisherman-verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 85,359
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 621
- Kudos:
- 2,971
- Bookmarks:
- 798
- Hits:
- 43,034
Bookmarked by Expensive_cat
11 Mar 2026