67mpala
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the faust paradox by albertacanuck
Fandoms: DCU (Comics), DCU, Nightwing (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
18 Jun 2026
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Summary
a magic trap requires a confession of a buried truth to open. unfortunately for jason and dick, they’re trapped together, and the universe doesn't care about their secrets until they finally start telling the truth.
or: a veritas spell breaks jason's walls down, and dick isn't letting him run away this time.
Bookmarked by 67mpala
17 Jun 2026
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Summary
"Death"
"You are finally ready, I see"
"Ready for what?"
"To live"
"Wasn't I doing just that?"
"Were you?"Harry had no answer.
(Perhaps that was answer enough. Or perhaps Death just enjoyed being cryptic. Hard to say.)
___{Time-travel AU. Watch as Harry is yeeted into the past, bullies the wizarding world into making sense, and absolutely refuses to follow Dumbledore’s script. Features excessive worldbuilding (someone's gotta fix this mess), slow-burn romance (because trauma-bonding is hot), and a protagonist who treats destiny like Terms & Conditions—unread and promptly ignored. Happy ending optional, sarcasm mandatory.}
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 321,971
- Chapters:
- 20/?
- Collections:
- 34
- Comments:
- 2,987
- Kudos:
- 9,696
- Bookmarks:
- 4,147
- Hits:
- 336,067
Bookmarked by 67mpala
15 Jun 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
Ch 13
Kreacher snapped.“No!” he screamed to the dusty heavens. “Kreacher will NOT stand for this! Kreacher is a respectable elf, not some filth-covered gremlin of the gutters! Kreacher will clean! Kreacher will scour! Kreacher will RESTORE!”
And oh, he would. He would rage-clean the entire timeline.
Every scrubbed tile, every banished pest, every tapestry re-hung with righteous fury would be added to the Great Ledger of What Master Harry Owes Kreacher (With Interest).
But mid-rant, mid-stomp, mid-throwing-a-bucket-at-a-spider-the-size-of-a-cat, he froze.
Because he remembered.
If this was 1988… then Master Harry wasn’t here. Not yet. He was probably eight. Still in that horrible little cupboard under the stairs. Still with the whale boy and that dreadful Muggle woman who smelled like hairspray and oppression.
Kreacher went very, very still.
“Oh…” he breathed. “Oh, little Master Harry. So small. So unloved. So… unaware of proper floor polish.”
The thought made his ancient, shrivelled heart clench like a cursed teabag.
“Right,” he muttered, pacing in increasingly agitated circles. “First: Kreacher cleans. Then Kreacher organises. Then Kreacher sanitises the linen closet. THEN Kreacher kidnaps Master Harry and teaches him proper wizarding etiquette, soup appreciation, and how to not nearly die every other Tuesday.”
...
“Oh no,” Kreacher whispered. “Oh no no no. Not it. Not again.”It was back.
The Horcrux.
The bloody locket.
“HOW IS HE EVERYWHERE?” Kreacher shrieked, flinging his arms to the ceiling. “WHY MUST THE DARK LORD LEAVE PIECES OF HIMSELF IN EVERY CUPBOARD, CLOSET, AND CURSED TRINKET BOX?!”
He levitated it — carefully, with protective charms and loud complaints — and locked it into a containment box so aggressively warded it practically sang hymns of protection.
“Kreacher will not be influenced again. Oh no. Kreacher has standards now. Kreacher has boundaries. Kreacher has growth.”
And then, brushing his hands, he declared with a firm nod, “Master Harry can deal with that mess after Kreacher steals him from those despicable Muggles and raises him properly, like any self-respecting, soup-fed Lord of the Most Noble House of Black.”
Of course, Kreacher had no clue that Master Harry was already here —also time-displaced, and somehow already elbow-deep in chaos before Kreacher had even dusted the library.
But that was tomorrow’s headache.
For today, Kreacher had cleaning to do, a house to reclaim, and a destiny to polish to a high shine.
The coming years?
Oh, they were going to be utter carnage.
But at least they’d be immaculate.
...
Fleamont wrote like a man who didn’t trust other people not to ruin everything.Sample annotations included:
“Stir counterclockwise or prepare to explain to St Mungo’s why you now have TWO spleens.”
“Pepperup still tastes like dragon arse? Add crushed mint. No, not that crushed mint, you fool, the proper one. If it’s gone purple, it’s developed a vendetta.”
“Nettle root must be diced angrily. Potion responds to emotion. Channel your rage. Think about the Ministry.”
“If it starts screaming, you’ve added the wartcap powder too soon. Scream back. Establish dominance.”
“Do not attempt this without three safety charms, a backup cauldron, and an alibi. You will set something on fire.”
“This variant works 32% of the time, assuming Mars is in retrograde and your self-esteem is stable. Good luck.”
“Note: wizarding lemon balm is not the same as muggle lemon balm. One soothes nerves. The other screams in Latin when boiled.”Harry adored it. The chaos. The precision. The unhinged brilliance. He read each page like a holy scripture and annotated them further with his own scribbles: little hearts, exclamation marks, and the occasional, "This man is clearly my patron saint."
By the end of the week, he was muttering things like “Establish dominance over your cauldron” under his breath and glaring at brewing pots until they stopped hissing.
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Summary
Harry, Hermione and George are struggling, their lives not what they envisioned post winning the war.
The ministry hasn’t changed, it’s still as corrupt as ever, George never recovered from Fred’s death and both Harry and Hermione are facing divorce in each of their marriages.
Hermione has a plan, it’s risky and could kill them: go back and do it all again, only better and saving certain lives along the way.
Series
- Part 1 of Second Chances
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 118,341
- Chapters:
- 40/40
- Collections:
- 23
- Comments:
- 1,291
- Kudos:
- 13,461
- Bookmarks:
- 3,763
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- 435,487
Bookmarked by 67mpala
14 Jun 2026
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Tim's collection of passive-aggressive mugs by BlueTee
Fandom Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Teen Titans (Comics)
10 Oct 2021
Summary
In which Jason and Tim become brothers throughout many conversations involving passive-aggressive mugs
- Words:
- 10,504
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 663
Bookmarked by 67mpala
14 Jun 2026
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It wasn't me (wasn't it?) by Muddell
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Young Justice - All Media Types, DC Extended Universe
23 Jun 2024
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Summary
“Dick,” Jason says. “Go away.”
“I’m not leaving you alone right now, Jay.”
Jason leans over himself, pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’m fine. I’ll be fine—just….”
“Of course you’re going to be fine,” Dick says. “You are fine.”
Jason shakes his head. “I can’t—it wasn’t me, Dick.”
“It wasn’t,” Dick agrees.
“It was just a fucking movie.” Jason wraps his arms around himself, the cadence of his breathing still uneven and quick and concerning. “I shouldn’t be—It shouldn’t matter to me.”
“It’s okay,” Dick says.
“He just—it sounded the same.”
Or, the Batfamily watches a movie. No one realized it would involve crowbars.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,155
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 59
- Kudos:
- 1,740
- Bookmarks:
- 281
- Hits:
- 11,183
Bookmarked by 67mpala
10 Jun 2026