unsweetened lemonade
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Listing Series
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i'd sell my sour soul by illumynare
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series
16 Feb 2025
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Summary
Xisuma swallows against his rising nausea and reminds himself that Grian is a former admin. He has undoubtedly done far, far worse things to his own players. He almost certainly deserves this, and if not—well—
He deserves it more than Scar, that’s for sure.
(or: Xisuma is running out of excuses to avoid punishing his players. He settles on a desperate ploy: hiring a disgraced ex-admin to run a death game as a distraction for the Higher-Ups.)
Series
- Part 1 of unsweetened lemonade
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i'd do anything for 20 bucks (to feel more in control) by illumynare
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, 3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series
21 Feb 2025
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Summary
The other admins who told him that he would have to be cruel, that playing the part of a fickle, angry god was necessary to satiate the ever-watching eyes—they were just making excuses. Grian has ignored every call to discipline your players, Admin Grian, or face the consequences, and the worst thing that’s ever happened to him is obsidian on his chests and a solo dragon fight.
The Watchers are cruel, yes, but their most fundamental trait is boredom. So all Grian had to do was just be clever and amusing enough, and they could never bear to snuff him out. RIP to all the other admins, but he’s different.
(or: All the ways that Grian lost himself, from the end of Evo until the eve of Third Life.)
Series
- Part 2 of unsweetened lemonade
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i won't quit until my eyes go red by illumynare
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series
05 Jan 2026
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Summary
So Scar has been selected for the starring role in a death game! That’s fine, it is perfectly expected and fine. Someone had to notice his charisma and star power (SCARRRR POWER) sooner or later.
Also, Scar grew up High Vex, which meant that “battle royale vs your friends and family, loser gets hunted for sport” was pretty much just another Tuesday for him. True, he’d never been much good at that part of the High Vex lifestyle, to the point that his family had been preparing to sell his Name to an Evoker before Cub helped him skip town—but! The point is! He has experience.
(or: the Third Life AU where Scar knows a little more than he should, and Grian's life is so terrible that the death game is kind of healing, actually.)
Series
- Part 3 of unsweetened lemonade
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till you sweeten up the soul by illumynare
Fandoms: Hermitcraft SMP, Life Series | 3rd Life SMP Series
18 Jun 2026
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Summary
And Scar wants Grian to be his friend. He wants it in the way he’s wanted very few things. So this present needs to be something special. Not just a chest of redstone or a plate of cookies, and not just a pile of poppies and lilacs. He needs a present that says, “Sorry about killing you in Third Life, and sorry about getting control of the slave collar that in my defense I am never ever gonna use—but on the bright side, now you have a place on Hermitcraft! So can we still be friends?”
(or: the AU where a captive Grian joins Hermitcraft in Season 8. Featuring Boatem shenanigans, Pearl's tragic backstory, and the inevitable preening chapter.)
Series
- Part 4 of unsweetened lemonade