Devastating (non-derogatory)
(Open, Moderated, Anonymous)
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Summary
Cas is supposed to be happy.
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Summary
It's like being buried at the bottom of a very deep, very dark well. Castiel has lived enough, sinned enough, for the weight of his mistakes to pin him flat in the darkness. It's shame and guilt and grief and each memory anchors him with a razor specificity, there in the lightless silence. This is how it works, he supposes. His own thoughts will devour him alive until he sips oblivion by choice, out of sheer desperation, and the void will know peace at last.
But that was the bargain. He took that upon himself. His choice. Choice, he thinks, and would laugh if he still had a mouth to laugh with. Freedom is a length of rope.
Then, after what could have been many eternities or just one, a pang of agony comes that isn't his own.
*
Or: the one where Castiel saves himself.
Series
- Part 7 of season 15 fix-its
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Summary
Cas dies and Dean starts referring to himself as a widower. This is somewhat confusing for everyone involved.
(Inspired by *that* tumblr post; linked in notes)
(Canon MCD not tagged because it's temporary)
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'Four lives, two hundred and twenty four years, all of those spent looking. Four lifetimes, Fitz. And I couldn't find you in any of them.'
A reincarnation AU.
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Summary
part one - "sharp shock" - in which the babies lose their virginity and it's totally not a big deal at all.
and everything after - brief, rare moments of emotional strangulation.
(aka the academy 'verse where i throw up dork makeouts and bad tropes)
- Words:
- 17,108
- Works:
- 8
- Bookmarks:
- 82