Chapter Text
Reggie storms down the stairs, the heavy weight of his duffel bag hitting his hip with every step he skips. His footsteps are loud on the worn-down carpet that had once covered the entirety of the stairs completely. Normally he wouldn’t dare to make so much noise, afraid it would anger his parents, but he is leaving for almost a whole week and it’s not like they’ll remember when he gets back. So if he jumps extra hard down onto the wooden floor. No one can blame him.
Reggie smiles at himself in the mirror that hangs opposite from the staircase, his face blurred by the dust covering it. He plucks his winter jacket from the hanger underneath, already wearing his leather one.
Alex is still standing where he left him. His discomfort would be invisible to anyone else, hidden by the mask he has learned to wear, but Reggie knows where to look. Alex's shoulders are tense and his right foot is soundlessly tapping the ground. Reggie wants to wrap his arms around him, but he restrains himself, unsure if Alex would appreciate the touch right now. Instead he grins, and when Alex’s shoulders relax, even if only by an inch, his smile widens.
Alex reaches out, taking the duffel bag from him in silence, nudging them both towards the car.
Reggie glances at Alex. He’s more at ease, but still radiates nervousness. He keeps his eyes trained on the rear tire of the car, not meeting Reggie's.
Reggie's mind is already racing, filled with thoughts and questions. How are you doing? Do you want to go through with this? Is it going to be like this the entire time? Do you want me to stop? Can I do something?
He settles on, “How did you sleep?”
Alex turns to him, though still not actually looking at him.
"Alex?"
Alex’s eyes flick up, stopping somewhere around Reggie's chin before he looks away and opens the trunk, shielding himself from Reggie’s question.
Reggie shuffles closer to the car, back within Alex's eyesight, but Alex blatantly ignores him. Alex's eyes are glued to his own hands as he places Reggie’s bag into the trunk with stiff motions and too much care.
Reggie huffs out a breath, folding his arms. Apparently Alex is going to be difficult about what's bothering him.
“Are you cold?” Alex asked, pushing the trunk shut.
“Did you even sleep?” Reggie retorts. He bumps his shoulder against Alex’s to show that he carries no ill meaning.
Alex rolls his eyes, pushing past him, still not looking at him. “Of course I slept.”
“You’re one of the worst liars in existence.”
“Why did you ask then?” Alex doesn’t give him time to answer as he opens the car door, half-heartedly pushing Reggie inside.
Reggie shuffles across the rear seat, placing his backpack between his legs. He greets Mr. and Mrs. Mercer, who greet him back, but the whole exchange lacks enthusiasm. He doesn’t mind that much, he isn’t here for them, he’s here for Alex.
Alex who won't tell him what's wrong.
“Is that road still blocked because of construction, or did they finish?” Mr Mercer asks Reggie.
“They cleared it up last weekend, sir.”
“Good,” he mutters under his breath, completely focusing on the road.
Alex shifts around, grabbing his headphones and Walkman out of the inside pocket of his jean jacket. Reggie watches him in silence. Normally he would poke and nudge Alex with questions and concerns until the boy acknowledged that he was, in fact, stuck in his own head. Never going as far as forcing him to share the reasons behind his anxiety, but enough to make it obvious to Alex that he isn't alone.
But they aren't alone. The silence coming from the front seats is almost louder than the screaming match his parents got in the night before.
He stares at Alex from the corner of his eyes. At his tense shoulders and stuffed away hands. At the way his fingers are curled tightly around the cuffs of his hoodie and his nails dig into the fabric.
Reggie wants to reach out, do something. Anything, if that means he can help. But he can’t, he simply can’t do anything. He has to leave Alex with his own thoughts. Reggie is not even a meter away and yet there are thousands of miles between them.
Reggie leans forwards, fishing a book out of his own bag. He flips through the book until he reaches the page he dogeared last night. He settles into the seat, eyes scanning over the paper to find the place where he had stopped.
Halfway through the next page, the car turns sharply. Unprepared for the sudden turn, Reggie collides against Alex, the seat belt digging in his side.
He turns to apologize, but he snaps his mouth shut when his eyes fly over the people in the front seats.
Apologizing to your boyfriend for leaning against him would be suspicious, wouldn't it? He questions himself. But so would be moving away like you burned yourself.
He swallows, collecting all the courage he owns. He forces his muscles to relax, as if the entire situation isn’t causing his heartbeat to pick up a faster rhythm. He rests his head on Alex's shoulder, expecting to be shrugged off. However, Alex lets him, even shifting in a way that Reggie's head stays on his shoulder when they take another turn.
Reggie blinks up at the car’s ceiling, stunned by the fact that the action has turned out in his favour. The book sits uselessly in his hands. He holds it up so he can continue reading, but the letters seem to dance over the page.
Eventually Alex leans back against him, his cheek pressed against Reggie's hair. Reggie can hear the bass of the song that's faintly playing in Alex's ear.
He pretends to read another page, letting his eyes wander over the words. It isn't as interesting as listening to Alex's soft music or focusing on the feeling of his chest rising and falling. He blinks at the far away window, the sky rolling by in a blur. He stuffs his book back into his bag, careful not to move away from Alex's side. Slowly he snakes his arm around Alex’s waist, curling closer. Alex doesn’t say anything, and Reggie lets his eyes fall shut.
An unknown amount of time has passed when Alex removes his headphones. The music stops, causing Reggie to wake up. He keeps his eyes closed, drifting somewhere in between consciousness and sleep. Alex shifts around, but his movements are slow and gentle, keeping Reggie leaning against him.
Reggie feels a bubbly feeling taking over as Alex puts an arm around him, pulling him closer. He breathes out, letting sleep reclaim him.
…
Alex lightly shakes his shoulder, waking him. “We’re here,” he whispers as Reggie blinks awake.
Reggie sits upright, rubbing his eyes. His cheek feels weird and when he presses his hands against his face, he can feel the indent Alex’s hoodie left. It's probably red, his brain provides helpfully.
Alex's arm slips off his shoulders. He pulls his hand through his hair and Reggie wonders if his own hair is as much of a mess too.
The car slows down as a big wooden cabin appears through the windshield. Reggie is sure that the windows on the first floor are big enough to make it possible to use them as doors to the roof over the large porch. As the car takes a last turn, he notices a second cabin down the mountain, the two houses connected with a paved road.
The excitement of new and interesting causes the last of remainders of sleep to fade from his mind.
Someone appears from the shadows of the second cabin, making her way towards them. Alex’s mom gets out, meeting the lady in the middle.
“When I missed that school trip three years ago it was because I was at her wedding to my uncle,” Alex whispers in his ear, unbuckling his seatbelt. Reggie follows his lead, having to look away from the house and Alex's aunt.
Alex’s dad turns off the engine and gets out of the car himself without looking at them. Reggie doesn’t mind.
“That cabin has more bedrooms, and this one” — Alex nods towards the cabin they stopped in front of — “has the bigger diningroom and kitchen, and our rooms.” He opens the door, slipping out of the car.
Reggie follows him, eyes jumping over the new scenery. The realisation that he doesn't know where he is dawns on him. He grabs hold of the edge of Alex’s sleeve, former excitement being replaced by the feeling that he's out of his element.
The air is cold and icy around them, suggesting that more snow will fall soon. A thin layer covers the plants and the pavement, but it’s already disappearing where the heat is radiating off the car. There isn’t any snow on the roof either, and Reggie briefly wonders who turned on the heat in the house.
He breathes in deeply, taking in the smell of wet earth and pine trees.
He catches slivers of the conversation while Alex’s dad pulls the baggage out the trunk. Eventually the lady nods towards where Alex and Reggie stand next to the car. With a hand movement in their direction, but without turning, Alex’s mom introduces Reggie as Alex’s friend , who would be staying with them for the holidays.
Reggie squeezes Alex’s sleeve, wanting to speak up, but the way Alex has his eyes trained on the ground and his lips pushed into an almost invisible line stops him from doing so.
It takes another ten minutes of chatting before they separate with a promise that Alex’s mom will come down to their cabin when she is done unpacking.
Reggie lets go of Alex’s hoodie in favour of grabbing his duffel bag. He wants to grab one of the boxes, but Alex’s dad shakes his head.
“We don’t want you to drop anything,” he says. And if one of the boys would have said it, it would have been a joke, them teasing how he can be quite clumsy sometimes. But that’s not the case now, Mr. Mercer’s tone cold and serious. Reggie tries to not slump into himself, before nodding and averting his eyes.
“I’m going to show Reggie our room,” Alex tells his parents, his hand finding the small of Reggie’s back, between his leather jacket and his backpack. “We will go unpack.”
They don’t respond as Alex turns them around, his suitcase in one hand, pushing Reggie towards the cabin with the other.
He unlocks the front door, leaving it open as he steps inside. Reggie gapes as he follows, eyes dancing through the entrance hall. It isn’t as huge as ones he has seen on television, but it’s still big. There are double doors on both the walls perpendicular from where they're standing and a flight of stairs that disappears up against the back wall. There is already a Christmas tree in the corner of the room, but it isn’t decorated yet.
Maybe we could decorate it together?
“The diningroom and kitchen are both that way.” Alex points at the right door, moving towards the stairs. “And a living room is that way.” He nods towards the other set of double doors.
“Wow,” Reggie mutters under his breath, rushing after Alex as the boy starts making his way up the stairs.
Alex glances past him, his eyes searching. Finding nothing, he drops the neutral expression that he had been wearing all day. Reggie lets out a sigh of relief. It's good to know that Alex feels comfortable enough to stop masking now it's just the two of them.
"Did I tell you I don’t like my parents," Alex says. He lifts his suitcase to the first floor, fingers drumming on the handrailing.
"Yes, but I think you should say it again," Reggie replies. He hoists up his bag on his shoulder, following Alex through the hallway. He hates them for making Alex feel like he isn’t worth being himself.
"Well, I don’t like them," Alex says, matter of factly, causing Reggie to chuckle. “I hate how they treat you. You don’t deserve that.”
“You don’t deserve it either.”
Alex hums noncommittally.
“You don’t,” Reggie repeats, wanting to keep saying it until Alex believes it as the truth it is, then continuing because he can, because he wants to.
They stop next to a door that has a sign with Alex's name. The natural wood is old and weathered, just like the once colourful painted letters on the sign. As Alex fumbles with the key, Reggie lets his bag fall on the ground, stretching his back. His spine pops and he lets out a soft groan. He is glad that the car ride is over.
He runs his fingers gently over the letters of Alex's name, smiling warmly at the sign. The letters go from a red to orange to yellow with a pink border around the name.
Maybe I didn't know Alex when he made this, but seeing it, nothing has changed. Not really.
"By the way, did your mom really called me your good friend ?" Reggie asks, not wanting to leave it untouched.
"Well, you are one of my best friends," Alex says, bumping his shoulder against Reggie's. He returns his focus back to the lock immediately after. The keyhole seems to have rusted at the edges from disuse.
"Well, I am," Reggie repeats, "but your mom thinks we're dating, so she shouldn't have said that."
Alex shrugs his shoulders, but Reggie still sees the glance he sends his way. Reggie opens his mouth to say something, anything. However, Alex is faster.
"Finally," he mutters, as the door clicks open. He steps into the room, suitcase trailing behind him. He holds the door open with his foot, looking over his shoulder at Reggie, head tilted slightly.
Reggie blinks, before closing his mouth and hurrying into the room.
Alex closes the door behind him, leaving his suitcase next to it. "I need to go to the bathroom," he says, pulling off his hoodie as he walks to the door on the right wall.
Reggie catches a glimpse of the sink, before the door clicks shut behind Alex.
His eyes dance through the room, falling on the bed that takes up most of the small space. And there was only one bed, a voice in his head says, sounding a little bit too much like Luke.
He swallows, before shaking his head. Sunset Curve wasn't shy on physical touch. He had stayed over at each of his friends houses, which often ended up in having to share a bed. It had always been that way, nothing new, nothing strange. He knows that, but still his cheeks heat up at the knowledge of having to share a bed with Alex for the foreseeable future.
He looks away, forcing himself to think of something else. He pushes aside the old red curtains, peeking through the window. There’s snow on the roof of the veranda. He can’t see the front of the house from here, but the sounds of a car stopping and people talking reaches him nonetheless.
Reggie lets the curtains fall back when the toilet flushes. He turns around, spotting the painting hanging above the dresser, next to the bathroom door. Reggie stares at it, frowning slightly at the abnormal blue colour of the sky. It shows a mountain slide, a cabin painted in a few brush strokes at the bottom.
He is still staring when Alex opens the door.
“Don’t like it?” Alex asks, placing his suitcase on the bed. He sits down next to it, pulling open the first drawer.
“No, that’s not it.” Reggie shakes his head, shuffling closer. He shoves his bag closer with his foot, before letting himself fall to the ground next to Alex.
“Where is it?” he questions as he unzips his bag. He glances up at Alex, who doesn’t seem to notice. He nudges Alex’s knee, which does get his attention.
Alex lightly kicks his thigh in response. “Bottom drawer,” he says, before looking up at the painting. “It’s actually this cabin. It has been around since forever.”
Reggie hums, starting to transfer his clothing into the drawer. When he is done, he shoves the bag underneath the bed. He stands up, only to let himself fall onto the mattress.
He rolls on his side, poking Alex’s lower back. “What are we gonna do?”
“Well, my parents would probably expect us downstairs soon.”
Reggie groans. Alex snickers, slapping his hands away when Reggie tries to poke him again.
“Quit it, if we do this now, we’ll likely be left on our own for the rest of the week,” Alex says, pushing his suitcase under the bed too. He stands up, looking down at Reggie with a raised eyebrow.
“Fine, fine,” Reggie says, standing up too.
“Ready to meet the family?” Alex jokes as he bumps his shoulder against Reggie's. He eyes Reggie playfully, daring him in a way.
Reggie grins, because even if this is new and different, they aren't. He takes the hand Alex is offering him.
"Bring it on, drummer boy."