Archive of Our Own

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Episode 7

Laura was undeniably nosey, but she was also in equal parts lazy and apathetic, depending on her interests.  Forcefully inserting herself into his love life had started to be one of her interests a few years back when she realized that ‘love life’ was a misnomer.  There were lines she didn’t cross, but if she felt there was a possibility for “Derek” to become “Derek + *fill in the blank*” then she made sure he faced the difficult questions: Did he like the other person enough to take the risk of asking them out? Could he accept not having them in his life if he didn’t take a risk?  Could he accept having them in his life as a friend, and only a friend, if he didn’t take the risk?

It was basically a lot of risk assessment.

So after she figured out that Stiles, Scott’s friend was the same person as the vlogger Derek watched more than the twice a week new videos were posted, Derek fully expected her to watch the videos to satisfy her curiosity as to why Derek was so taken with them. Laura would want to make sure Stiles was worth Derek’s interest, and she would see the videos as the opportunity to know what Derek knew, to attempt to see what he saw, and out of everything he knew about Laura’s tenacity, he knew she’d stumble across them sooner or later. 

Derek was actually shocked it hadn’t happened already, because she should have started watching them weeks ago, the moment she first put things together.  And when she did watch them, he knew what she was going to see.

Stiles mocking him over the internet.

Derek might be able to see beyond that, but Laura? He was hoping that she tried watching, got bored somewhere along the way, and gave up, because he could tell that she hadn’t seen the most recent ones that started with the introduction of Really, Derek Hale?

If she had… well, he would be scraping little pieces of Stiles off the foyer floor seconds after he tried to enter the house.

If Laura had watched the Really, Derek Hale? videos she wouldn’t forgive them as easily as Derek was (trying to).  She certainly would never forget.

Derek still had a small sliver of hope that he and Stiles would manage to meet in the middle.  He was learning that Stiles wasn’t perfect and that his opinion wasn’t infallible, and Derek hoped that there was a similar shift of dynamics going on with Stiles.  He didn’t dismiss what Stiles had done, entirely, but he kind of understood how it could happen.  It was a rare person to see beyond Derek’s taciturn, almost chilly first impression.

But then, most people just called him a cold bastard to his face (or behind his back), they didn’t air their animosity on the internet.

And Laura?  Laura was worse than Derek was when it came to forgiveness.  Derek had a higher threshold for clemency, for seeing the good in people close to him, almost to the point of blindness, until they took things too far.  Derek didn’t forgive, but it took a hell of a lot to flip that switch and Stiles wasn’t even close to it yet.

So he didn’t want Laura to see the videos and think badly of Stiles, because this was Derek’s life and he thought that for once, Stiles was a risk he was willing to take. 

Laura wasn’t the one he had to worry about.

 “Allison, I need…” Derek started, trailing off when he noticed the image on her computer screen.  She scrambled to pause the video, tilting down her laptop screen quickly and minimizing the frozen image of Stiles paused mid-pointed barb.

“Derek!” she said in surprise, wiping the tears off her cheeks with an impatient hand.  “I don’t… it’s not… it’s just sad YouTube video of animals dying?” she finally settled on, but Derek knew her well enough to tell that her hands were shaking in fury and the tears went deeper than any of the horrifying videos of animals on the internet.  There was an expression of personal betrayal written all over her face.

“You’re watching Stiles’ video blog,” he guessed, sighing internally.  All this time he’d been worried about Laura, but of course Allison would be aware the videos existed.  He moved forward so he could sit next to her, hoping that maybe there was time for damage control.

Allison nodded hesitantly.  “How did you guess?”

“He’s on your computer screen for one thing,” Derek answered, nodding towards her laptop.  “I recognised him immediately.”

“Please don’t watch them, Derek.  They’re…” she shifted, clearly tormented. Allison didn’t want him to know what was on those videos, but she didn’t know how to warn him away without bringing his attention to them.  The conundrum was written all over her expressive face. “They’re so unkind, and I don’t know if I can forgive Scott for this.  He’s not the man I thought he was, if he can just sit there and allow…”

Allison trailed off and her expression closed off, telling him that she was going to protect him at all costs, even if it meant her relationship with Scott.  He recognised the stubborn set of her jaw and the sudden hardness in her eyes, steeling herself for what was ahead.

Derek reached out and drew her towards him, tucking her against his shoulder so that his chin brushed against the crown of her head.  He could feel the slight tremor in her limbs, and it was second nature for him to sooth her.  There was a long time when the two of them only had each other to lean on and to understand.  “I think Scott will surprise you.  He’s a much better person than you’re giving him credit for, and I think you know that or you wouldn’t feel so betrayed.  Keep watching the video, he isn’t complicit for long.”

 “Wait.  You knew?” she questioned incredulously.  “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“What is there to say?” Derek asked in confusion.  “That Stiles doesn’t like me?  That was obvious.”

 “But there’s a difference!” Allison asserted sharply, drawing away from him.  Her expression was furious.  He thought some of that might be directed at him.  Mostly Stiles, some Scott, but also at Derek for what she saw as suffering in silence. “Between dislike and –“ she gestured at her laptop sharply.  “I invited him into your home.”

“This is your home,” he reminded her gently.  “I just live here.”

“No, this is where you live and where you feel safest, and I brought him here.  I invited him, and he insulted you.”  A tear rolled down Allison’s cheek. He hadn’t wanted to make her cry again. “Derek, no one deserves to be mocked like this, but you least of all.”

“Don’t,” he told her gently, closing her laptop mid-video so neither of them had to see Stiles’ mouth open, frozen in the midst of saying something harsh and critical about him.  He grabbed Allison’s hand, squeezing gently.  “This is between Stiles and I.”

“All this time I thought the two of you were flirting,” she said ruefully, shaking her head.  “He really dislikes you.”

“Who says we aren’t flirting?” Derek questioned with a smirk.

“Flirting with who?”  Laura asked as she walked past them on her way to the kitchen.  “We all know Derek is a terrible flirt, so you probably aren’tflirting in any way that's recognizable to most people.”

“Nothing,” Allison answered with terrible evasiveness, wiping at the tear tracks on her face with the back of her hand.  “It’s nothing!” she answered again, despite the fact Laura hadn’t called her on anything yet.  “Just Derek and…”

“Stiles,” Laura finished for her in her best ‘ah yeah’ tone.  She looked between Derek and Allison, then noticed the laptop.  “Oh yeah, the pigtail pulling videos.”  She rolled her eyes directly at him.  “You two are so obvious.  And oblivious, though it seems that at least you’ve pulled your head partly out of your own ass.”  She sighed, all dramatic flair as though she was greatly put upon by his stupidity.  “Don’t worry, Allison.  We’ll walk in on them having angry sex on the couch someday.  Possibly with the webcam still running. Then they’ll see.”

Unspoken ‘then the whole internet will see.’

_____________

Derek always gave Stiles’ videos two hundred percent of his attention, so he noticed when Derek Hand wasn’t being played Scott.  Derek thought the reason for that might be Allison.  Scott had been over the night before and had spent hours with Allison in her room, only to leave looking like someone had stolen his childhood security blanket and killed his best friend (or at least threatened to).  When he had seen Derek watching a video in the living room, Scott had stopped, looked Derek in the eye, and gave him a sincere apology.

It had taken major courage to do something like that, and Derek could appreciate the sentiment, even if Scott wasn’t the person who owed him an apology.  When Derek had pointed that out, Scott had shifted his weight from one foot to the other, clearly uncomfortable, but hadn’t said a word.

After weeks of running into Stiles at almost every turn, both a blessing and a curse if you were Derek Hale, the only encounter they had was two days before.  Derek had offered Stiles a drive outside of the post office and Stiles had said no.

That was it.

Seriously, the full exchange of words was:

“Hi Stiles,” Derek said, shoving the tracking number from the parcel he had just mailed into his pocket.  The two of them had almost bodily run into each other when Derek exited the building and Stiles walked around the corner, likely coming from the police station.  It was rare to see Stiles in town without his jeep. True Facts.  Derek had once seen him get in his jeep to go to a building a block away.  “Need a drive somewhere?”

“Nope, I’m just heading home,” Stiles answered, already cutting across the empty lot next to the post office.  “I’m running late!”

And that made sense.  He could probably cut across that lot and walked another street over in less time than it took Derek to drive it.

Seriously.  What happened during that encounter that Stiles needed Derek Hand again?  Derek was justifiably confused when the opening of the newest video was of the two sock puppets.  As far as he knew, he hadn’t done anything worthy of censure or mockery in the last… five days or so.

Philes Philages:  My best friend isn’t speaking to me.

Philes Philanges:  I think it’s your fault.

Derek Hand:  of course it’s my fault.

Derek wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but a woman’s voice wasn’t it.  That just added to the confusion he was experiencing.  Whoever she was, she had hair that looked both blond and brown, depending on what way the camera hit it, and her voice grated with a kind of familiarity that put his teeth on edge.  Was it jealousy? he wondered, trying to remember the female friends Stiles had on his show.  Lydia, maybe.

Philes Philanges:  I was starting to think you were an ok guy.

Derek Hand:  Don’t, Philes.  Never underestimate how cold hearted and villainous I am.

Derek didn’t take any pleasure out of the possible rift between Scott and Stiles.  Surely Stiles knew that.

Derek Hand:  Because that’s what I do.  I steal people.  I get under your skin like a flesh eating scarab and once you trust me, I destroy everything.  Everything.  I take and take and take and I leave nothing in return.  I turn all your friends against you.  Can’t you see, I’ve only just started, Philes. First your best friend and then the rest of your family.  I’ll rob you of everything you hold dear.

What the hell?

That didn’t sound like Stiles, even at his harshest.

Derek felt like he was going to throw up.

The woman laughed off screen.  “That was fun!” she said, pulling off the sock puppet.  “And cathartic.  It’s so hard to be Derek Hale,” she mocked, with a cruel laugh that sent chills down his spine.

He didn’t need her face to appear in the camera frame, because he knew her voice now.  Derek’s heart was beating too quickly in his chest and he just wanted the video to stop as he grabbed his computer off the desk and threw it at the wall. It shattered on impact, the outer shell appearing mostly intact as it landed on the floor, belying the fragmented interior and cracked screen.  For a moment Derek didn’t know what to do, didn’t know where to go or how to act. He was more terrified than furious, the insidious little tendrils of fear clawing away beneath his breastbone as he tugged at his hair and tried to refrain from screaming.

“Derek, what…?” Laura asked, alarmed, as she slammed open the door to his office.

“Allison,” Derek realised. 

He pushed past her, hurrying for Allison’s room.  She was supposed to go out and meet Scott for supper, picking him up at home before…

Oh god.

She couldn’t go to that house, not with her…

“Allison!” Derek shouted, pushing into her bedroom without knocking.

“What are you doing?” she asked, a jarred line of nail polish across one of her toes from being startled.  “Derek, what are you…”

“Kate’s in town,” Derek answered, tone almost ragged, as he pulled a suitcase from beneath her bed and dumped it on the mattress.  It tipped over the open bottle of nail polish, but Allison was already off her duvet and running for her closet.

“Are you sure?” Laura asked, the rational one in the doorway.

Derek nodded.  Then he found his voice, and answered more firmly and with a sense of finality.  “Yes.  Take Allison back to Los Angeles.  Tonight.“

"What about you?”

“I’ll take care of the house and meet you there.”

“Derek,” Laura said, worried, as she grabbed his arm.  "Don’t do anything stupid.  Come with us.“

"I can’t yet.  I have to…” Derek wasn’t sure he could voice what was so important.  It wasn’t the house or Beacon Hills, it was protecting Stiles and doing everything he could to get him out of Kate’s clutches.

“Derek, please.  I can’t go through this again without you.”  Allison’s voice cracked.

“You won’t have to,” he promised.

_________________

“That was fun! And cathartic.  It’s so hard to be Derek Hale.  Let’s try again, I think I can really get into the core of the character.  Asshole is easy.”

Stiles sat up, appearing in the frame of the camera as he peeled the sock puppet off.  He grimaced at it before throwing it across the room. “No.” 

“Asshole isn’t easy?”

“Let’s not try again. It was terrible enough the first time around.  Let me know when you have better material, I have more important things to do in this video today than make fun of Derek Hale with you.”

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Episode 8

x.x.x.x.x.

The year is 2013 people, not 1980. We know what blood splatter looks like ok? You don’t need to protect our sensibilities or anything, and your movie isn’t trying to recreate a debatably golden area of cinema. So why did the serial killer get shot, clutch his waist and fall, and there was no blood?  This is a horror movie, and there was blood in other scenes so there wasn’t some kind of stylistic decision made, just bad CG.  I had to pause the movie, I was so distracted by—

“Stiles? They’re gone.”

“What’s gone?” Stiles asked, turning towards the doorway to his bedroom.  “Those cookies mom bought?  Yeah, dad finished the last one off for breakfast.  If he thinks I’m not going to hold that over his head for two weeks’ worth of salad he’s mistaken.”

“No,” Scott inhaled raggedly.  “Allison and the others.  They left.  The house is empty and she’s not answering her texts and both of the cars aren’t in the yard.”

“Is that all?” Stiles asked.  “Is this like that time Laura and Allison decided to go into the city to shop and she forgot her phone when changing purses and Derek didn’t answer the door because he’s a jerk?  That’s more detail than I ever wanted to know for a situation outside of a Sandra Bullock movie.”

“No, it’s not like that at all. Allison promised she wouldn’t forget her phone again and even if she did, Derek answers the door for me now.  Even if he wasn’t home all the curtains wouldn’t be closed and the back balcony locked.  Something’s going on.”

Stiles laughed.  "Something’s going on, alright.  I bet they all just went to do whatever rich people do when they’re bored.  Sailing. I bet they went sailing.“

______________________

We went by the Argent/Hale house earlier. Scott was right, no one’s there.  He’s worried.

______________________

“You can’t,” Derek reminded her, a pinched expression on his face.  He knew what Allison was going through – he wasn’t happy about the situation either, and for all the pain it caused him, he knew it was a hundred times worse for her.  “If she’s in the house, she’ll find ways to check Scott’s phone or email.”

“I trust Scott,” Allison said obstinately.

Derek sighed.  “I do too.  I like him, I really do, but we can’t chance that Kate will find out what our plan is. If we want to return to Beacon Hills as soon as she leaves, you can’t contact him.  If Scott even gives a hint of the fact we’ll be back, she’ll dig in and stay forever.”

“You know he’s right,” Laura spoke up from the couch.

“But it’s hurting him,” Allison said.  “Did you see his face?  The worst thing is that he’ll understand why and forgive me, no matter how terrible I am to him.  Derek, it’s not fair.  I don’t want to be that person, especially not to Scott.”

 “You can’t,” Derek reminded her, running his hand through his hair.  “It’s a risk.”

Allison scowled at him, and for a moment he worried that she would argue with him.  Then her shoulders slumped.  It wasn’t so much tension leaving her body as it was the weight of everything settling over her.  “I know,” she said mournfully.  “Scott’s a good person, he wouldn’t tell, but…” she looked to him to fill in the reason, not because she didn’t understand why but because she didn’t want to be the one who said it out loud.

“He wouldn’t mean to,” Derek said gently.  “But Stiles is his brother and Kate’s resourceful.  If Scott knows where you are, there’s a chance she could find out.  If Scott knows you hope to return once she gets bored and leaves, she’ll stay indefinitely.  He might not even have to say a word, Kate’s a master at this kind of manipulation.  She’ll read the truth in his body language.”

“I know,” Allison whispered.

“You know,” Laura spoke again.  “Scott might be forgiving, but Stiles isn’t.”

“Yeah,” Derek said.

_______________________

Laura called the Sheriff’s office to ask dad to keep an eye on the house until someone could be hired to take care of it while it’s empty.  Laura.  Dad says they aren’t coming back.  He was the one who told Scott…

________________________

Derek wished he could just stop Allison from watching the videos and tuck her away into a safe place to keep her happy.  He’d managed one out of three, and it didn’t seem to be enough.  It would never be enough.  Every time she saw Scott’s heartbroken face, or listened to Stiles talk about the situation, she broke a little more inside.  Derek was watching it happen slowly, and he felt helpless to do anything about it.

“We could just tell him the truth.  The whole story.  Scott’ll understand.”

“That’s a decision you’ll have to make.  If you tell him about Kate – everything about Kate – do you think he’d be able to let it go and not try to defend you?  If he confronts her it could be the same as…” Derek trailed off, because even after all this time, it wasn’t easy to say the words out loud.

“I know.”

“She’s dangerous.”

“I know.” Allison reminded him.  “Better than anyone, but I can’t do this anymore.  I feel like I’m going crazy.  I have to find a way to get a message to him.  What about Stiles?” Allison asked.  “Kate probably won’t be keeping such a careful eye on him.  Maybe you could tell him how you feel about him and then…”

“Allison,” Derek interrupted.  “They’re friends.”

“Derek!” Allison mimicked him.  “Stiles wouldn’t be friends with her if he knew.  If you told him.”

“Allison!” he echoed, just to see the wan smile she directed at him.  He didn’t think he could watch her pale face attempt for composure for much longer, especially after Beacon Hills where she’d been as carefree as he’d ever seen her.

Before Kate.

It would be one thing if she pleaded with him, but instead she turned away, already resigned.  He wanted to see a little bit of fire from her, because without it everything was so much worse and he felt like the villain for being the one who had to say the words out loud, to speak sense.

“Ok, I’ll think about it,” he ended up promising, because Kate had ruined enough in their lives already, she couldn’t have this too.   “I know how much I’ve asked of you already, but can you please wait just a few more weeks?  Once Scott stops moping and starts acting normal, a drastic change in mood might not be so obvious.  She might not notice if he’s suddenly happy then.”

“Yeah, she will, because that’s who Kate is.”

Derek nodded sharply.

"This’ll be over soon, right?” Allison questioned in a small voice.

Derek reached for her, smoothing down her hair with soothing strokes.  "I promise.  She’s back in the country, and that’s a good sign that something will eventually stick.  I’m working on it.“

______________________

Scott spent the last two days sulking in his bedroom and eating nothing but Nutella.  I’m all for Nutella, usually, but he just went through two jars of it because it’s Allison’s secret favourite or something and now I don’t even want to think about what he’s doing in the bathroom.  You’d think he’d have learned his gastronic lesson when he had food poisoning.

It’s really difficult not to have THINGS to say about Allison Argent. But I won’t defile Scott’s relationship with her by criticizing her over the internet.  Just know…

Fuck, this is messed up.  

Derek figured he may as well take the chance, because it wasn’t like Stiles could think any worse of him.  Maybe Allison was right and the truth was necessary. 

It took two weeks before Derek was able to return to Beacon Hills.  He needed to make sure all the perishables were out of the fridge, the garbage was emptied, and everything outside was brought in.  The pool had to be emptied, windows checked to make sure they were locked, and a bunch of other small tasks one did to close a house indefinitely.  Allison requested they keep the rental furniture until they were sure they wouldn’t return in another month, but Derek couldn’t see how they would ever make it back.  Not if Kate was in town.

Tonight at supper dad was like ‘I thought I saw Derek Hale donating food to the Salvation Army.’  What an asshole, doesn’t he know their stance on gay rights? I thought Scott was going to weep into his creamed spinach which yeck, I don’t blame him, we should all know better than to allow dad make supper by plugging in the can opener, but obviously he’s wondering about Allison like a wounded penguin or something that mates for life.  I can’t snap him out of it, and if Derek Hale is back in town… DEREK!”

____________

“Mr. Hale,” the Sheriff greeted once he opened the door, staring at Derek with a considering expression, and he didn’t seem too surprised to see Derek on his doorstep. 

“Is Stiles home?”

The Sheriff stared at him for a moment.  “He’s upstairs,” he finally said, gesturing for Derek to come in.  “Second door on the right.”

That was confusing, right?  Stiles’ father shouldn’t just allow a stranger into his house and direct him towards his son’s bedroom. 

The moment Derek stepped through the door, the Sheriff patted his shoulder in a fatherly gesture.  “You’ll never know until you try,” he said, nudging Derek towards the stairway.

Derek was even more perplexed, because he had no idea what he was supposed to be trying.  For a moment he panicked because the Sheriffseemed to know.  That made Derek feel even less at ease than he already was.  It wasn’t easy to walk those steps forward, aiming for Stiles’ bedroom, but the idea of turning back now was already equally as difficult.

“DEREK!” Stiles exclaimed, jumping back from his computer and staring at him.  “Whhhhy? Are you here for Scott?  He’s across the hall.”

“I need to speak to you?” Derek asked, taking a step into the bedroom.  He felt like he knew it intimately already, but it was entirely foreign to him at the same time.  The features he was most familiar with were at his back and he was facing a whole section of wall that was never featured in the vlog.  For a moment he was distracted, wishing he could explore the details in Stiles’ room, like the titles on the bookshelf or the texture of his bedsheets.

Though, that last one was weird.  Even Derek was aware of that.

So he sat on the edge of Stiles’ bed.

… the sheets weren’t that soft.

Regardless, he surveyed Stiles, who seemed to be struggling against the desire to kick him out.

“Well, maybe I don’t want to speak with you,” Stiles finally settled on, crossing his arms over his chest. “What could you possibly have to say to me?”

“There’s something we need to talk about, and I’m not sure when I’m going to get another chance.”

“Yeah?  What could you possibly want to say?  More put downs?  This should be fun.  Tell me,” Stiles gestured at his webcam with a sarcastic and unimpressed expression.  “Tell us.”

“The camera’s on?” Derek questioned, noticing that the light on the camera was steadily staring back at him.  He suddenly felt a hundred times more uncertain, not needing the added pressure of knowing that whatever he said to Stiles was going to end up on the vlog. He was positive he couldn’t do this, his palms sweaty and his throat drying up with the idea of of the camera on him.  "Can you turn it off?”

“You said you had something to tell me,” Stiles reminding him in a mocking tone.  “There’s no time like the present.”

Derek stared at him, taking in the hard, unforgiving set of Stiles’ jaw, and he knew that no matter what he said, or how he worded it, Stiles would never magically be impressed by his words.  Derek wouldn’t leave this room with his dignity, but he thought he might be able to leave it with a clear sense of closure, because Stiles wasn’t a regret he wanted to look back on and wonder if thinks might have been different if he had just said something.

“I didn’t come back to Beacon Hills to take care of the house,” he finally said.  “I came here to see you.”

“No shit, you’re sitting here, aren’t you?”

“It’s the only reason. The rest I could have hired someone to take care of for me, but…”

“Oh, here we go,” Stiles rolled his eyes.  “It’s all about money with you, isn’t it?”

“This isn’t easy for me!” Derek snapped.  “Do you think I’m happy about this? You’re not perfect. You misuse words trying to make yourself sound smarter, your family is insane, you’re overly sensitive about money because you don’t have any, and we don’t travel in the same social circles so if my family was alive most of them probably wouldn’t like you, but I don’t care because I do.  Like you.”

Stiles turned to stare at him, mouth open and eyebrows furrowed together, a sure sign of disbelief.  That was certainly better than the air of animosity he had been giving off, but not by much.

Damn.  Derek hadn’t meant to phrase any of it like that.  He had a speech, one that talked about how much he appreciated the way Stiles kept him on his toes and challenged him.  One that talked about his unwavering loyalty and stubbornness and intelligence and wit and how much Derek loved waking up the mornings of his new videos in order to see his face, especially now that they’d met in person and Stiles hadn’t made anything easy on him.

“I’m going to regret asking this, but when you say ‘like’ do you mean like a fifth grade girl with a crush?”

“I love you,” Derek amended. “Most arduously,” he smirked. Now, his brain supplied, now is the time to tell him why.  “You…”

The words wouldn’t come out.  The speech was entirely lost from his mind as he took in the cruel twist to Stiles’ mouth.

Stiles burst out laughing. “I what?” he finally asked.

“You completely overwhelm my ability to have rational thoughts.”

“Yeah?  Well I hope you take comfort in the fact you weren’t beingrational, because I’m gonna have to say no to that.  Nope.  All the no’s.”

“I didn’t ask a question,” Derek growled, because of course Stiles would be like this.

“What kind of question is there to ask?  Because believe me, the feelings aren’t mutual.  So I think we should just leave it there.  And I think you should leave, because it’s kind of obvious that your irrational mind isn’t thinking clearly.”

“I didn’t mean it like that!  If you would just take a moment to…” Derek wasn’t sure if he broke off his speech or if Stiles cut him off, but either way he was glad that his mouth stopped moving because he was perilously close to whining.

“Oh my god, you are the world’s most pretentious douchehole.  Do you even hear the words coming out of your mouth?  This isn’t just me saying I don’t have feelings for you, this is me telling you that I loathe you completely.  You put me down all the time and make me feel so tiny, the nicest thing you ever said to me was agreeing to the fact your sister thinks I have a nice ass, and what you did to Scott?  I mean come on! Really, Derek Hale?”

Derek felt his face heat up and he knew that he was flushed with a combination of embarrassment, horror, and shame.

“Scott?” Derek questioned.  “What about Allison?  Did you take her feelings into consideration?  Fine, she left town, but there’s more to the story than that.  She doesn’t always make the best choices when under pressure—“

“Clearly,” Stiles snorted.

Derek could take all the abuse Stiles was piling on him, but he would not take slurs against Allison’s character. “Maybe you should seriously reassess who you allow into your life, because you’re clearly not the finest judge of character,” Derek snapped.  “She couldn’t have stayed here, no matter how much she wanted to—”

“You had a lot to say about that, didn’t you?  What did you say to make her leave? Because one minute she was whispering soft nothings into Scott’s ear and the next she was back in Los Angeles and not even responding to his texts.  Do you realize how controlling that is?  And you want to add me to the list of people you have this dictatorship over and you think I’d go willingly?”

“You know what your problem is?  You don’t take the time to listen to other people, you’re so convinced you’re right all the time.  You need to grow up and stop making snap judgments about people.”

“You don’t even know anything about me,” Stiles continued angrily.  “If you did, you’d never even consider having this conversation… do your research.  Watch my blog.”  Then he jerked back, horrified that the words had even passed through his lips.  Derek could see the recrimination written all over Stiles’ face, but he was reeling from being categorically turned down and vilified.

“You mean your horror movie review Youtube channel?” Derek asked, getting to his feet.  “Because you’re such an upstanding moral paragon of virtue to relentlessly mock someone on a public forum without their consent.”

“You knew about that?” Stiles questioned, shaken.  “How long?”

“Before we met,“ saying the words gave him great pleasure.  A sick, vindictive kind of thrill that he wasn’t entirely comfortable in enjoying.

“If you knew then why do you still…?” Stiles gestured vaguely around his bedroom, managing to include himself on the all-encompassing motion.   The words ‘love me’ were unspoken.

“Because your actions were part of what I liked about you,” Derek informed him, before walking out the door.  “Maybe, if you’d done your research you’d understand why.”

x.x.x.x.

Episode 9 

x.x.x.x.

This is Derek Hale’s fault, I’m sure of it.  I tried to tell Scott how tightly he has Allison wound around his finger, but Scott couldn’t see it.  He thinks that Allison had to leave ‘for reasons,’ but she just left town without a word.  What reasons could there be for that?  I’ll tell you what reasons.  Derek Hale thought they were getting too close and didn’t like it.  Or… I don’t know.  But Allison is a sweet girl and I can’t see her skipping town without saying goodbye to Scott unless she was forced out of town.

I know things! The things I know!  I know that this isn’t the first time Derek Hale has taken Allison away from the person who loves her the most.  And the things I know all point to Derek Hale being a controlling, manipulative bastard. It turns my stomach.  It would turn anyone’s stomach to think of the way he controls that sweet girl, keeping her on an allowance – at her age!  I really thought Allison was different than the person she turned out to be, but I guess if you’ve been a victim long enough… I should talk to my dad about it. About things!

As for Derek Hale’s indecent proposal, I don’t want to think about it, but I will say this: I don’t think there’s anyone in this world who I have a lesser regard for than Derek Hale! The things he said! None of them are true, my family is amazing and I never misuse words!  He’s terrible and it’s that kind of viterole that makes it super obvious that he might be emotionally abusive to the people in his life.

“I’ve told Allison she’s better off not watching this one,” Laura told him.  “Do I have to tell you too?”

Derek shook his head.

“This is it, right?” she asked.  “Either way, there’s no way back from the things he’s now said about you over the internet.   You either need to tell him the truth or cut him out entirely.”  She put a hand on his shoulder, leaning so that her forehead pressed against the crown of his head.  It was a habit they had as children, but she rarely did it these days, no matter how much both of them needed the comfort it brought, because she claimed his hair gel seeped into her skin and made her break out. Though Laura never had a problem with her skin, so Derek thought it might be because he was taller than her now.  “I know you tried, and I know how much that means,” she told him, voice catching slightly as she soothed a comforting stroke down his arm.  “How much he means, if you put yourself out there the way you did.  What he said on his vlog this time is… well, if anyone knows how Kate can wrap someone around her little finger, it’s the three of us.  I don’t think he’s beyond your reach yet, if you act fast.  Don’t let this fester and hope it goes away eventually.”

“I think I might be angry,” Derek confided, frowning.  “I’m not sure if it’s with Stiles specifically or… no, it’s with Stiles.  I’m furious at him for being so blind.  I’m not Kate.  I’m not.”

Laura ran her nose through his hair until her lips pressed against his skull in a quick kiss, before turning his computer chair around so he was facing her. “I’m furious with him too, but I’m so proud of you.  If you can go to him and put all your feelings on the table, knowing what he was saying about you at the time, you can do this one last thing.  Derek, if Kate’s in his life… I don’t think you can be angry enough at him to ignore what might happen to him if he’s completely in the dark about how she’s using him.  Are you?”

“No.”

“She found and exploited the one person, one weakness who wasn’t loyal to you back and made you the bad guy.  Put a little bit of attention back on her actions, won’t you?”  Laura grinned at him sharply.  “No one knows better than you do what it’s like to be under Stiles’ scrutiny.”

________________

Weak! Weak! Computer graphics have come a looooong way since 1980, and I think one of the best werewolf transformations I’ve ever seen was in Lycaon’s titular series from 1985 to 1995.  It was heavily prosthetics, but it was golden.  This, though? Werewolves looked cooler on Buffy, and that’s saying something incredibly judgemental, because as much as I loved Buffy, I think we can agree that the werewolves were weird and kind of… “what the hell?” Stiles paused.  “New email from Derek Hale? What the hell?”

He looked at the screen, squinting at it as though he could see Derek through the webcam and was judging him.  “Is this a cease and desist order?  Suing for slander?”  Stiles laughed, leaning forward to stare at his computer screen.  “Oh, this is priceless, he’s trying to explain himself.”

“Really, Derek Hale? Really?  Reallllly?”

[cut footage]

 “Oh my god!” Stiles crowed, “there’s a video attachment.”  He leaned forward with glee.  “Oh, this is going to be so good!  Here, let me read this to you!  Oh man, this guy is something else.”

To: Stiles Stilinski [email protected]

From: Derek Hale [email protected]

Subject: If you want to know why Allison really isn’t contacting Scott…

Stiles,

I’ve attached a video because I know you work with videos as your medium, so you can analyse it and judge it as the truth (or not) easier than you can things in print.  It’s not about me, or you, or my unfortunate attempt at a ‘You and I.’ It’s about Allison, and by extension Scott, so watch it over before airing it. That’s not an order, I just think you’d never forgive yourself if you were stubborn about it and ended up hurting Scott.  If you still think it’s something you want on your blog, then you have my permission to post it.

Derek

1 Attachment: yesreally.mov

_____________________

Derek looked at the screen, seeing his image echoed to him and judging the way he looked incredibly nervous, but earnest and with just a hint of desperation. 

“Hi Stiles,” he said, a small smile turning up at the corner of his mouth, unbidden, just at the name.  It was a habit he didn’t need right now.  “This isn’t about my feelings towards you, or your feelings towards me.  I’d appreciate it if you’d watch it all the way through, out of morbid curiosity if nothing else.  I know I’m not your favourite person right now, but I’m worried for your safety.”

Derek paused.  He knew enough about cinema to know that it would probably come off as on purpose, a deliberate pause to serve as an ominous warning.  And yet Stiles would be intrigued, because Stiles enjoyed good pacing.  In reality, it was difficult to compose his thoughts around something that he didn’t want to voice out loud.  More than difficult to know he was relying on Stiles to be the person Derek hoped (and knew) he was rather than the person he proved himself to be, and not post this after he saw the content.

“This isn’t entirely about Allison.  It’s about Kate.  She… Stiles,” Derek appealed, and then reigned himself in.  “The setting is important, isn’t it?  I had really great parents.  I don’t know if they were good people or not, but from everything I’ve seen or heard of them, they were.  I do know that they were fantastic to Laura and me.  Allison had a similar situation.  Her dad would have protected her from anything, and she loved both of them.  The Argents and the Hales were business partners, and one weekend my parents decided that getting away to New York for a few days would be relaxing, and Mr. Argent had a business meeting.  They all died in a plane crash.  I was eighteen at the time, and in love.”  Derek shook his head, not wanting to go there.  “Laura twenty-one.  Allison was fourteen, and so she became a ward of her aunt Kate’s.”

“We were close, the three of us, and besides Kate, Laura and I are the only people left that Allison considered family.”

Derek paused, unsure how to transition into this.  Bluntness would be easiest.

“Kate admitted to Allison that she sabotaged the plane for her inheritance money, unaware that Chris had written her out of his will and the insurance payouts.  Kate killed both of my parents and the Argents on that plane, and she didn’t get what she wanted.  I haven’t been able to prove it, so I won’t speak about whether it’s true or not, but I do know that there is no doubt in my mind that she told Allison that she did and that she’s capable of it.  That’s why, when she expressed to Allison how easy it would be to harm Laura and I, Allison believed her and slowly signed over most of her inheritance between the ages of fourteen and sixteen.  Kate didn’t get what she wanted from the plane crash, so she made sure she got it from Allison.  We wouldn’t have ever known if she hadn’t slipped up once, forgetting to pay Allison’s tuition and the school called one of the Argent/Hale joint companies so I went over to check on them.  Kate didn’t know I was there and she started saying… Allison couldn’t stay in that kind of environment so Laura and I paid Kate three million dollars so we would become Allison’s legal guardian.”

“Kate didn’t think it was enough, and she’s right, no amount can be set by Allison’s worth, but once an extortionist always an extortionist. We’ve paid her twice since then.  Maybe we should have gone through more legal channels and did it through the Courts, but I couldn’t allow Allison to live in that situation for a moment longer, because I should have seen it.  I broke up with Kate because I suspected right after the crash… I knew what she was and I didn’t expect it to extend to her own living family, which was stupid, so stupid.  So really, it is my fault.  Everything,” Derek took a deep breath, staring at the floor, eyelashes fluttered almost imperceptibly as he composed himself.

“Allison was forced out of town, we all were, but it wasn’t by me.  It was fear, and self-preservation, and it might not have been handled well or the best thing we could have done, but Laura and I will do anything to protect Allison.  Allison isn’t ready to see Kate again.  I know you’re used to her being happy, but a lot of that is due to Scott and this is tearing her apart.”

“The one thing you were right about is Scott.  I have been keeping Allison from contacting him.  So long as Kate is in Beacon Hills, we know where she is, but more importantly, the FBI has jurisdiction over her when she’s in the country.  They haven’t found any proof yet, but maybe this time…  I’m not sure how well Scott could act around Kate if he knows anything, even where Allison is.  He doesn’t have a good poker face, so I am sorry about that, and I’m sorry that I’ve placed the decision on your shoulders now.  You probably know more about what Scott can handle than I do.”

“Other than Scott, I trust that this will remain between you and me.  A lot of the secrets I’ve mentioned aren’t mine to tell.  Allison encouraged me to come forward, or else I might never have composed this letter, so I know that no matter how much you hate me that you wouldn’t hurt her.  I think – I know that you’re an honourable person and wouldn’t consider sharing a video of this magnitude with your followers, but I will always make sure Allison’s safety is my first priority, so I hope you will ignore the insult to your character when I ask you not to share this with anyone.  Ultimately, the choice is yours, but you wouldn’t just be getting back at me, you’d be taking away the last pieces of safety Allison has in relative anonymity, even if it’s been shaken in recent weeks.  Once Kate is in jail…

Please, Stiles.  Do what you can to protect her, too.

And look out for yourself.  Kate isn’t someone you want to cross.“

[end of cut footage]

The video cut frame, showing Stiles afterwards. The dichotomy between his smiling, almost malicious expression, and the thoughtful frown on his face made it more than obvious. “I’m sorry, but I won’t be sharing the rest.  I’m going to have to think about what do with this letter because I’m not sure what it is.”

Stiles’ frown deepened, lines showing around his mouth. 

“So, werewolves…” he eventually continued.

x.x.x.x.

Episode 10 

x.x.x.x.

Derek’s stomach was in knots for days waiting for Stiles’ next video, knowing that he might not have published the video letter online, but unsure as to whether Stiles would change his mind.  Derek thought it was a good sign that any mention of the contents of the email or what was said within said contents had been cut from the vlog entry, but the fact that Stiles hadn’t edited out the fact the email existed in the first place made it seem like posting it was an option Stiles was keeping open.

Stiles himself said it was an option he was keeping open.

Derek really had no basis for why he thought that Stiles probably wouldn’t post it.  There was something about the whole scenario that wasn’t sitting right to him, and he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.  Maybe it was the fact that his belief in Stiles, as unwavering as he wanted to claim it was, had actually been shaken at some point since he had asked Stiles out, only to be so categorically turned down.  Maybe it was the fact that for months he’d believed in Stiles based on a bunch of videos, only to be hurt time and time again.  Maybe it was the fact Stiles had teased his viewers with the fact he had something on Derek, even if he wasn’t specific.

But Derek didn’t think any of those options really spoke to how he was feeling because when he thought of Stiles and his reaction to Derek’s letter, what he felt was relief.

Which didn’t explain his feelings of unease with the situation.

“I don’t know how the two of you can have such absolute faith,” Laura snapped over supper on Wednesday.  “What if he went straight to Kate and the two of them laughed about it and they’re planning something as we speak?”

Allison shrugged.  “I got to know him,” she finally settled on.  “Everything that happened with Derek was an aberration of his character.  In fact, his whole family thought that meant that Stiles… uh. They thought it meant something it clearly didn’t. At first I wasn’t sure, but he did the right thing once already.  I think you’ll see that even though he says he isn’t sure, that he’s made a decision already and will stick with it.”

Laura wasn’t convinced.

“What about you?” she demanded, almost confrontationally.  “How can you be so calm?  Because you love him?”

Derek shrugged.

Derek… Derek didn’t know what to think anymore, because if a mistake had been made anywhere, it was made by him.  Because he trusted someone he shouldn’t have.  He didn’t have Laura’s judgmental pessimism or Allison’s conviction in goodness, he just had his guilt and the Jenga tower of faith he had for Stiles as a person, someone he actually didn’t know on a personal level, it turned out.  How often had he been wrong so far?

Not that many, a little voice in the back of his head poked at him, but the truth wasn’t all that helpful.

Derek went for a run the morning of Stiles’ next scheduled update, pushing himself until he was panting, sweat pouring off his brow and stinging his eyes.  He finished a 10K run in fifty minutes, which wasn’t a personal best, but he’d been lax in keeping up his training over the last few weeks.

His fault, of course.

He made it home before the video was posted, showered, changed, and ate lunch before his phone chimed with a small notification that held so much personal investment for all of them.

His heart was beating quickly, phone tightly clasped in his hand until his fingers left smudges along the back of it.  Derek’s head buzzed with anticipation, a reaction that was so devoid of worry that it actually left Derek reeling in confusion.

No matter what he tried to convince himself, he wasn’t over Stiles yet because each beat of his heart seemed to stutter his name.

Without a word, Allison brought her laptop into the kitchen, setting it in front of Derek with the Youtube page already loaded and waiting for her to press play.  She didn’t until Laura settled down on Allison’s other side, none of them ever exchanging a word.

“5 minutes, 28 seconds,” Laura read out loud, and none of them said what they were thinking: that over five minutes was plenty of time for Stiles to tear their world apart.

Allison pressed play, and Derek was sure than none of them breathed for the full 5:28.

Stiles’ newest Stiles’ Horror Picture Blog video ran through without a single personal aside. No mention of Derek, no mention of Kate or Scott or Allison or even what he ate for breakfast.  It was one of the most professional videos he had ever managed, almost devoid of personality entirely.

The three of them watched it together and the relief was palpable in the room.  Laura, strangely enough, was the one who looked the most vindicated, like her pessimism was just a front to hide her concern that Stiles wouldn’t be on their side.  Allison shrugged and smiled, but Derek could see that a weight was lifted from her shoulders.

It hadn’t really been Derek taking a chance on Stiles, it had been all three of them, but Allison had been the one out of all of them who had already lost the most, still had the most to lose, and she had been the strongest out of the three of them.

Derek just felt… he didn’t know how to feel.  There was no sense of relief.  His only revelation was that whatever it was that was on his mind, it wasn’t whether Stiles would post the video letter or not.  If anything, the weight settled more firmly onto his shoulders now that he’d seen the vlog entry and confirmed that Stiles hadn’t aired his confession.

If Stiles could be so reasonable, so thoughtful about his actions and the impact they could cause, then why had Derek become such a blind spot to him?  Why was it ok for Stiles to post the vlog entry of Derek’s mistimed love confession?  Why was it ok for Stiles to almost air the letter just because he sent it?

Did Stiles really hate him that much?

Yes.

In that moment, Derek understood ‘yes’ to be the answer, to have been the answer all along.  For every step he took to try to repair his image in Stiles’ eyes, Stiles had only hated him more, each moment clouding things a little further until his absolute hatred for Derek brought them to the place they were now and Stiles had been on the precipice of doing something completely out of character for him because of that hatred.

It was one thing to hear the words spoken out loud and quite another to understand the truth of them deep in his core, an upset that settled in his stomach and shook him with the pervading sense of disquiet.

Derek reached forward, brushing his finger along the line of Stiles’ face, paused on screen, before closing the laptop lid firmly.

_________________

So Derek worked on finishing the storyboard for Therianthrope.

Even if he was still in Beacon Hills, the moment he finished working on preparing the movie for pre-pre-production, he would have had to return to Los Angeles.  Everything that happened had just quickened the inevitable.  It wasn’t really comforting to know he would have eventually left, and probably never would have taken those final steps towards sharing his feelings with Stiles, because on this side of exposing his heart, the relief of knowing he tried didn’t even touch the way it felt to know for sure that he was rejected.

“I don’t really understand,” Laura said, sitting on the edge of his desk and watching as he created a movie board out of adhesive putty, notes, string, and the large blank wall in his office.  Two days ago it had been blank and now he had almost a third of the movie plotted out.  Stiles’ voice came over the speakers of Derek’s computer, talking about the effective use of scene cuts in modern movies.  Derek had a playlist created of all the helpful moments he could remember, pulled up from a database worth of ideas he had created based on Stiles’ opinions and had been working on before they even met. 

Even the times when he disagreed with what Stiles said were useful because they helped shape the direction he wanted to go in. 

“You’re doing this for him?” she asked.  “Giving him the perfect movie?”

“I’m doing this for me!” Derek snapped.  “It’s mine, and it has nothing to do with him.”

Laura held up her hand to stop his verbal rebuttal.  “Fine, but in your place I wouldn’t be able to listen to these,” she said over his thoughts as he surveyed his board and then moved a part of the timeline, writing a note for it to cut scene.

Derek ignored her.

“But for you, Stiles as a person was always secondary, wasn’t it?  You almost kept them separate.  Stiles the intellectual horror critic and Stiles the asshole vlogger.”

“No,” Derek said tersely, marking the change he’d just made to the board in the official document.  “There was never anything separate about them.  They’re the same person.”

“But you only met one of them.”

“They’re the same person,” Derek reiterated. 

He could sense her making a face behind him.  “Then I don’t understand how you can listen to this after everything that happened.   God Derek, he cut you down into tiny pieces.”

“Just because,” Derek trailed off as Stiles said something particularly brilliant about lighting (or lack thereof) that would really work in the scene with the final transformation.  He moved forward quickly, making note.  Eventually, these concepts would be slightly more intuitive to him than they were on his first foray into the movie world, but for now there was Stiles.  “… things didn’t work out between us personally doesn’t mean…” Derek looked up to see that Laura was gone.  “Stiles isn’t worthy of listening to.”

“He doesn’t want me,” Derek said to the empty room, “I can hear what he’s saying.” 

x.x.x.x.

Episode 11

x.x.x.x.

Derek’s relationship with Stiles remained at a stand-still for longer than they knew each other in person.  Derek still watched Stiles’ vlog twice a week, the first moment he was able to after getting the phone notification that it had been posted, and Stiles still refused to publically comment or discuss Derek’s letter.  He kept to the decision he had made in the video entry right after Derek sent the letter about Kate, which was to just ignore the fact that Derek had sent him anything and pretend it didn’t exist.  It had the opposite effect on Stiles’s viewers than he (and probably Stiles) suspected it would.  Instead of forgetting about the fact Derek existed, they came up with more and more farfetched reasons why Stiles wasn’t talking about it.

And honestly, some of the things they came up with Derek wouldn’t have considered in a million years.  There were commenters who assumed they had gotten together, citing how perfect of a couple they were with Derek’s ‘dark hair and tanned skin’ and ‘general surliness’ paired with Stiles’ ‘cute-hot factor’ and ‘talkative enthusiasm’.

Derek thought he really needed to hire some of these people to work on his character outlines because they had such a way with descriptors.  Their comments seemed to highlight how well of a match Derek and Stiles were physically, which hadn’t even been on Derek’s list of reasons why he thought that Stiles was someone he’d like to (potentially) spend a great deal of his future with.  He knew that he found Stiles attractive, but he hadn’t considered that Stiles should ‘jump that sex machine bc you just know his angry eyes would fuck into your soul in the bedroom (or up against a wall lol)’ as being a legitimate check mark in the column of why Stiles should date him in return.

And really, Stiles had eyes.  Derek was actually a little relieved that Stiles didn’t seem to care about how intensely fuckable Derek came across either because Derek would rather have nothing from Stiles than have only that.

x.x.x.x.x.

Derek finished his storyboard, spreading it out over the length of one wall and half of another.  It was colour coded in a system that even he would have lost track of a time or two if he didn’t keep detailed notes of the entire project.  He kept a record of every decision and variable, the spreadsheets on his computer expanding even as the official project became more streamlined until he was left staring at the document for two days without making any considerable changes. 

It took another day to realize that was because he was finished and not because he was stuck.  It was a strange feeling to see the storyboard in its entirety, so much larger than he imagined when starting out, and yet it was also months’ worth of work condensed into a single finished product, one with so much distance left to travel until he could say it was completed.  It seemed almost tiny considering the amount of work he’d put into it, every lined infused with a piece of himself.

Seeing it completed was like all those little parts of himself he gave to the project all formed into a single entity, a vision of himself and his worth, and it was beautiful in that moment, making him feel a sense of accomplishment that overshined all the smaller concerns in his life.

He’d just finished one of the most important and complicated achievements of his lifetime.  His first movie – something he wasn’t sure he could even succeed at, and it was ready to move into the pre-production stages, bringing on board the entire resources of the Lycaon team.

He felt like he was soaring, his brain buzzing with the oxygen at that height as he dropped his pen and hurried into the apartment, locating Allison sitting at the kitchen table. 

“What are you grinning at?” Allison asked him.  It didn’t register with him that she was smiling down at her phone instead of at him as she looked up and caught his eye. He hugged her quickly, a stealth attack that had her shrieking and kicking back at him as he lifted her off her chair.  She laughed as he put her down, reaching out and pinching his cheeks right over where he knew his dimples were probably showing.  It wasn’t rare for Allison to be mistaken for a blood sibling of Laura’s due to their similar colouring and the fact they were both objectively rather beautiful, but the truth was that Allison and Derek looked more alike when he smiled.  “You’re happy!” she exclaimed, almost expressing her own exultation just because he was.

“Am I?” Derek asked, fully aware that he was smiling slightly, but he thought what was probably more telling was how relaxed his body felt, like a weight was off his shoulders, drawing out the tense, defensive curl of his posture.  It felt right and not forced for once, and he wanted to share it.

“Are you being coy?” she asked.  “Because you’re kind of terrible at it.”

“Learned from you, darling Allison,” Derek told her rumpling her hair.  “How did you get out of that parking ticket last week, hmm?”

“Not through coyness. The opposite, actually,” she told him, tilting her head and fluttering her eyelashes at him.  Then she laughed and punched his shoulder to offset the mock flirtation.  “So what is it?  D’you finish?”

“I think it’s a cheat day,” he informed her, drawing a small tub of Häagen-Dazs out of the freezer and digging into it with a large spoon.  “Want to go get a Fatburger later?”

Allison wrinkled her nose.  “Not unless there’s a reason to celebrate with an upset stomach and an extra five pounds to my ass.”

“I finished the movie,” Derek said in a light tone, scooping up more ice cream and chasing a drip down the length of his spoon.  “And we’ve sulked enough.  I think it’s time to get out of the apartment.”

“You’re going to have to once Laura realizes you ate her emergency ice cream.”

Derek stuck his tongue out at her and felt delightfully childish.

Allison stared at him for a second.  “Yeah,” she finally said with a soft smile, voice cracking a little.  “I want a burger.  I think it’s exactly what we all need.” 

And Derek understood that it wasn’t the act of going out for a burger that she was talking about, it was the act of closing the door on a chapter of their lives and moving forward.  Onward to greasy food, complaints about indigestion over milkshakes, and rewatching Ginger Snaps with Laura providing most of the commentary.  Onward to a good night’s sleep and moving beyond Beacon Hills without completely ignoring or forgetting who and what was left behind.

“Mmm,” Derek said, dropping the half eaten tub of ice cream on the table beside her.  “I think I’m going for a run,” he decided, feeling the bounce of energy thrumming through his limbs.  He felt so alive, like the drag that had been pulling him back was finally cast aside and he could do anything.

Allison laughed and stole the rest of the ice cream, snatching it away from him as though she thought he’d fight her for it.  “Terrible idea,” she reminded him through a mouthful of the cold green tea flavour as she pointed the spoon at him.  “Really horrible idea after half a tub of rich iced cream. You’re gonna puke.”

“Will I?” Derek asked, enigmatically. 

“I don’t think you ever learned how to make expressions like a normal person,” she said, grinning.  “Because right now you look like Spock inPlato’s Stepchildren.”

Derek stared at her for a moment.  “It’s the alien influence. And that was a really good reference.”

“Thanks. I watched it with Scott.  I have a few other references in reserve, just waiting for the right moments.”

The fact that Allison was able to say that without a hint of remorse or heartache made Derek feel even better about the possibility that a new chapter was opening in their lives, like they were all able to finally look forward.  It felt good.

x.x.x.x.x.

Derek didn’t throw up the ice cream.  

It was a really great day.

And the next day, he went into his company with the storyboard on a thumb drive, feeling more confident than he had in ages.  He’d never been particularly bad at portraying himself as self-assured while at Lycaon or in the field, because this?  This he knew.  This was his stage and in his blood.

If he could face rejection on a public vlog followed by dozens of his colleagues (and a bunch of teenagers, which might actually be worse because for a while Derek thought his barista might be laughing at him), then he could certainly face them in a board room.

As their boss.

x.x.x.x.x.

It’s time to address something. Stiles said, his expression one of reluctance as he bit his lip and then soothed it with his tongue.  Other than that, he was as direct as always, showing the preparation that probably really went on behind the scenes of his vlog.  One of the things that made Stiles great was the fact that despite all his careful planning, he never got too concerned about deviating from script, whether it was interruptions or changing his stance on something mid-speech.  Derek hadn’t noticed it at first because Stiles was so seamless with it – it took actually meeting him and knowing his habits in person to really see when Stiles was going off script, and this was painfully, painfully planned out.

I know a lot of you have been curious about what happened in what you refer to as the ‘Really, Derek Hale’ segment of the show, and yeah, I mean something did happen but I’ve seen a lot of questions and assumptions and none of them are really right.  There were no dick pictures, to answer what most of you thought.  The video he sent wasn’t pornographic in nature.  And yeah, I have to apologize to all of you because it seems like I’m being a tease or something, but I’ve really decided to turn over a new leaf here.  No more talking about my personal life or the people I know.  It’ll be a challenge for sure, but Derek Hale’s name won’t be mentioned in my videos again.  The person I will not mention again has given me some things to think about – and a lot of them are about myself as a person.  Self-reflection is hard, guys, but I think it’s important.  I don’t want to be that person who bitches incessantly about someone and airs it all on the internet, where it can stay forever or until an EMP wipes out the world’s data cores.  At best it doesn’t really give me a leg to stand on when judging who the biggest asshole is, because I’ve been reading back over some of your comments in the past few weeks and it strikes me that I might win that competition hands down…

AND IGNORE THE INNUENDO OK?

I can hear the comments now.  This isn’t a cop out.  No, I don’t want to share what He Who Shall Not Be… oh hell, I don’t mean he’s Voldemort.  I don’t want to share what he sent me, not because it’s overly personal to me or because I’m protecting him.  My feelings in that regard haven’t changed, except I’m now aware that maybe I was just as big of a jerk as he was.  He didn’t really even talk about himself in it, and he didn’t threaten to sue like user SawXXX thought, so you can put that idea out of your head right now.  He was nothing but civil even though he didn’t have to be, so I think I can return the favour.

Stiles looked down and away from the camera. No more talking about Duurhurk Huurr.  His eyes shot up andStiles blinked once over the screen, took a breath to say something, and then cut out.

Derek stared at his computer screen.  What had Stiles just done?  He was drawing more attention to the whole thing and letting certain people – Kate – in on the fact that there was a video in the first place.

It was supposed to be over, but Derek couldn’t shake the sinking sensation that maybe it was only just beginning, or the sudden buoyancy of his hope.

“Now that’s how you do coy!” Allison yelled at him through the wall separating their bedrooms.

x.x.x.x.

Episode 12

x.x.x.x.

The phone rang just as Derek was turning off his computer after a day at work.  Revisions were still being made to the script, but no major alterations were planned.  The project had moved into the phase where he had selected a crew from the talent at Lycaon, making a few additions to their employee list, and bringing in some consultants and firms specializing in CGI.  Some tentative location scouting was going on, and it looked like the vast majority of the movie could be filmed on their lot.  Like most projects, it was a cyclical process, and he was aware of some looming revisits to his storyboard he would have to make now that he’d spoken to the CGI experts on the subject of cost and time.

He wasn’t sure how that would translate into the movie he wanted to produce.  He needed a consultant to help him understand the impact of what his expert consultants said.   The entire thing made his head ache a little, but in a way that made him feel exhilarated.

When the phone rang, Derek moved to pick up his work phone before realizing that the sound was coming from his personal cell phone, the one tucked into his briefcase next to his car keys.

People rarely called him personally, so it was a foregone conclusion that Laura needed him to pick up milk or chocolate or tampons, because Allison rarely asked for something she couldn’t go out and buy herself, but Laura loved exploiting the fact she had a brother who was now leaving the house regularly.

“Hello,” he said casually, reaching to adjust his tie in the reflection of the glass in his office.  It was perfect, as usual, but long days in the office occasionally gave him the old sensation of being stifled.  It wasn’t as bad as it could get in public places, but people who assumed that film productions weren’t busy obviously had no idea what one looked like. 

It helped that Derek employed most of the people he had to speak to in the run of a day, and since he employed them, he also knew their names and enough about their lives that he could stumble through casual conversation.

It also helped that no one expected him to dance.

The silence on the other end of the line was just long enough for Derek to notice and frown at the sound of slight static, rustling, and the reverberation of someone inhaling.

“Hello?” he asked again.  “Laura, do you need something? Midol, maybe, since you made me buy three different brands of tampons yesterday.  Three.”

A snort.  “No, but I know who to ask should I ever need one.”

“Stiles?” Derek asked incredulously.

“Derek,” Stiles laughed nervously.  “Hi. I probably shouldn’t have called. I knew this would be weird, but now I’m thinking it’s probably too weird.  If I hang up right now, will you forget that I did this faux pas de deus ex machina?”

“Stiles? What?” Derek questioned, and then shook his head, because now was not the time to be distracted by Stiles’ clever word play.  Or idiocy.  Whichever this one happened to be. 

“I didn’t think so,” Stiles answered, resigned.

Instead, Derek wondered why Stiles was calling him. He couldn’t help but be hopeful for the prospects, optimism racing his rational mindset about the possible scenarios. 

Was Stiles calling to admit he was wrong?  To tell Derek that maybe they could work out anyway?

As fantastic a thought, Derek didn’t think that any amount of time could erase what was in the past.  Stiles could re-evaluate Derek to the best of his abilities, but Derek was a prudent kind of person.  He understood that, to Stiles, everything that happened between them before would always be cast in a negative light, and the best Stiles could ever manage would be to start judging Derek with fresh eyes.

And chances of that happening?  Slim.

But he never expected Stiles to reach out to him, it jarred all of his expectations and made him wonder if maybe Stiles actually was trying to see Derek differently.

“So, what’s wrong?” Derek asked, wincing at how straight to the point his tone was.  There was nothing he’d love more than to exchange small talk with Stiles, but the reality of the situation was creeping in, and Derek was starting to understand that Stiles would never call Derek.  Ever. 

Unless it wasn’t for himself.

“Kate,” Stiles supplied slowly, as though he was uncertain about saying her name out loud. 

Derek froze, because of course.  Of course Stiles wanted to talk about what Derek had said in the video he sent.

“She won’t leave us alone and keeps integrating herself into our lives.  She’s out with Melissa right now,” Stiles said, breathing deeply.  “I don’t really know why I’m calling. Reassurance, maybe?  Worry.  I feel this sick sense of dread that something might happen and it’ll be all my fault because I knew.  I knew and I didn’t do anything to stop it.  Just please tell me she’s not psychotic. They’re driving along the coast down to the cliffs and if she just does stuff for fun…”

God, Stiles never did pull any punches. “Money is her main motivator,” Derek assured him.  “She doesn’t hurt people for the pleasure of it.”

“It’s a good job I don’t have any,” Stiles answered.  “So that doesn’t really make sense.  Why is she still here and not stalking you down in Los Angeles?”

“I don’t know her mind,” Derek reminded him, though he suspected Kate was just waiting for him to swoop in for a rescue, believing that he would do anything for Stiles.  She’d found the videos, and like everyone else, read Derek’s regard for the person creating them, the person who openly despised him and presented himself as a possible ally or at least resource to exploit, and Derek had just left Stiles there to deal with her.

The knowledge that maybe he’d been wrong this time sat heavily in the pit of his stomach.

“I don’t have anything she wants,” Stiles said slowly, working things out. “Neither does Scott, or my dad, or Melissa. But you do.”

It wasn’t a question, but Derek answered anyway. Of course Stiles would understand and reach that conclusion.  Stiles always saw straight to the heart of the matter, with only few exceptions.  Derek swallowed, because of course Stiles was right, and of course he had immediately identified the one moment where Derek was actually the one at fault.  “Yeah,” Derek answered honestly, sinking into his chair as he admitted to the fact that he was the one to blame for Stiles’ problems.

Stiles was usually the first to point out when things were Derek’s fault, and Derek knew that this time Stiles was right and he was just waiting for the words to be said out loud between them, the blade turning with a final flick of the wrist that would effectively kill and sever the enduring bud of new growth cultivating between them.

"That’s why she’s here, isn’t it? Because of you. Even though she turned up before I knew how you felt, it was obvious to everyone, wasn’t it?”

And there it was.  If Derek had ever gained any ground with Stiles, it was gone now.  “She knows me better than you do, don’t blame yourself.  It’s my fault you were dragged into this, because she won’t stop until she gets what she wants, and she sees you as a way to get it.”

“You’re joking, right?” Stiles sounded surprised.  “I got dragged into this? I… You actually believe that, don’t you? Never mind that it’s my fault your name was broadcasted all over the Internet in the first place and that I created the bull’s-eye on myself.”

“I’ll find a way to fix it,” Derek promised with a sense of desperation.   

Stiles was silent for a moment. “No, weren’t you listening to me? This is my problem to solve. I’ll take care of it.”

Stiles was…

Stiles was viewing Derek at the worst he had to offer and wasn’t vilifying him.  It was more than Derek had ever actually hoped for.  It was the exact opposite of every situation he’d ever been in with Stiles and his mind reeled with the implications.  He could barely even think of Kate, and he had to keep reminding himself that even though it meant everything to him, it didn’t necessarily mean anything to Stiles except what it looked like on the surface.

Then it hit him what Stiles was saying and suddenly he couldn’t breathe, throat constricting as he tried to find oxygen.  He clawed at his tie, dragging the knot down until it tightened in harsh lines of silk.  All he could hear was the racing of his heart and the drag of air through his lungs as he struggled between the dual urges to vomit and scream.  “You can’t just take care of Kate on your own, Stiles,” Derek answered harshly, the fingers of his free hand biting into the arm of his chair.  “She’s dangerous.  She murdered… promise me you won’t go after her.  She won’t… no one stands in her way.”

“You don’t have to worry about me,” Stiles answered casually, as though he found Derek’s reaction amusing.

“She won’t just go after you, she’ll take down everyone in her way.  Scott.  Your mom.  Your dad.  Do you know what it’s like to lose almost everyone?  To attend a funeral where you’re burying both of your parents?  Do you know what it’s like to be that alone?”

Stiles was silent, the lack of sound over the line heavy, and Derek fought the reflex to apologize.

“My mom died when I was eight,” Stiles answered in a tight voice.  “My dad is a cop.  I’ve been living with that possibility for years.”  Stiles inhaled, a shaky, unsettled rattle of air that upset the imbalance between them, creating an equilibrium based in grief.

No wonder Stiles thought he was an asshole, it was justified this time.  Stiles had called him out of worry, and what had Derek done?  Added to it.

“I’m going to give you the phone number of the FBI Agent in charge of the case,” Derek told him.  “If you have any reason to feel threatened, call him.  Nobody wants to catch Kate after she hurts someone else, but there’s not enough evidence to arrest her yet.  Someday, maybe,” Derek trailed off as he searched through his wallet for the business card he was looking for.

“I promise,” Stiles said after hearing the phone number.

They sat without saying anything, Derek’s shoulders finally relaxing now that he had affirmation that Stiles wouldn’t do anything stupid.  “I’ll give her the money she wants before I’ll let anything happen to you.”

Stiles snorted.  “So she can just disappear again and your Feds will never find her?”

“Yes, Stiles, of course.”

“I have to go.”

x.x.x.x.x.

Really, it was only a matter of time before Hollywood effectively killed the zombie motif, and I’m not sure there is a spell strong enough to resurrect it. 

A shadow fell behind Stiles from the doorway, and Derek’s eyes snapped from Stiles’ face as Kate appeared behind him, the lack of light outside of Stiles’ room shrouding her in a way that had his heart jumping with more fear than he’d experienced in the last five horror movies he’d watched.

“Knock, knock,” Kate’s voice called out from the hallway as she took a step forward.  “Are you filming a new blog entry?  I was telling your mother how impressed I am by your commitment to this little project of yours.  She told me how small you started, and now look at you, attracting horror movie experts, and Derek Hale, and…”

“I don’t talk about things off topic anymore,” Stiles reminded her, entirely unconcerned as she moved through his bedroom.  “Especially that.”

“Oh sweetie, we both know that wouldn’t have lasted longer.  Admit it, you’re a talker. So tell me, what has your brother been so happy about recently?”

“Didn’t you hear?” Stiles asked, grinning at her.  “I would have thought Melissa mentioned it on your drive down the cliffs to Fort Bragg.  Scott got into that program he was on the wait-list for!”

“Is that all he’s smiling about?” Kate pressed.

“Yeah,” Stiles answered, shooting her a look of confusion.  “Isn’t that enough?  Or do you really think his life revolves around one girl he knew for about a month?  He might be lovelorn, but he’s allowed to be enthusiastic about other things.  Especially after everything that happened.”

“Oh, don’t you worry, honey,” Kate said cheerfully with all the reassure of a starving piranha nudging against a person’s flesh.  “Derek Hale will get what’s coming to him.  You still think that, don’t you?  His video didn’t change your mind about him?”

Stiles smiled at her, lips curving slowly and viciously, a clear threat.  “I’ll make sure Derek Hale gets what he deserves.”

x.x.x.x.

Episode 13

x.x.x.x.

Derek couldn’t breathe.  How was he supposed to breathe when Stiles had just threatened Kate Argent and posted it over the internet?  Who knew how long ago that had happened – Stiles’ vlog was rarely published the moment he finished it, with the exception of the few times he was really indignantly upset about something, which usually corresponded with segments of Really, Derek Hale? This seemed to be the same, but Derek knew the difference.  He knew this was a deliberate choice on Stiles’ part because Stiles hadn’t bothered editing Kate out, which meant he was comfortable with his threat being in the public domain, he was deliberately putting it there as a way to call Kate out, and Derek couldn’t breathe.  Stiles could already he dead somewhere, and if Kate ever figured out Stiles wasn’t talking about Derek, there was every chance that he still could be, with the protection of thousands of eyes watching his declaration of intent or not.

“Derek!” Laura exclaimed, rushing into his room as he clawed at the neck of his t-shirt, hand shaking around the glass of water he was drinking in an attempt to calm his nerves.  “Stop,” she told him, putting her hand over his to steady the glass.  “What’s wrong…” she turned her head and shouted out the open doorway. “Allison!”

Allison’s face was pale when she came into the room.  “Derek, oh my god.”

“I have to go to Beacon Hills,” Derek realized.

“He’s not worth it,” Allison promised.  “Derek, don’t you see what he’s doing to you?  You were just starting to put the last few months behind you and now he’s drawing you back in.  Just forget about it.  I know that it hurts that he took Kate’s side…”

“He took Kate’s side?” Laura asked indignantly.  “I’m going to slap that little bitch so hard if I ever see him again.  And if you move your hand towards your mouse one more time, I’m going to slap you too.  Get off Expedia, so help me Derek.  He’s dead to us.”

Her wording just made the boulder sitting on his chest gain substance, and he shuddered.

“Dead,” Allison affirmed.  “Scott said Stiles has been acting evasive lately, I thought it was just because… I can’t believe we all fell for that again.”

“You’ve been talking to Scott?” Laura yelped, rounding on Allison.  “What is wrong with you?  I hope that boy is worth everything that is going to happen to our family now.  Look at Derek.  Is he worth the expression on Derek’s face?”

“I knew about Scott,” Derek finally managed to say, wondering what his face looked like.  It couldn’t be good if Laura was using it to illustrate how guilty Allison should feel. 

And now she was taking a picture with her phone. 

“We need to stop running from Kate,” Derek decided.  “She’s not the boogyman.  She’s not infallible.  She’s just a woman. An evil, manipulative, murdering bitch who will deserve what she gets, but that’s not going to happen until we stand against her.  It took Stiles a month to do what we weren’t able to do in almost five years.”

“What?  You want us to join with Kate?”

“Stiles didn’t join Kate,” Derek responded harshly.  “He just threatened herin front of all of his followers, and if she figures out that what he thinks I deserve is retribution and her rotting in jail, she’ll kill him.  We all know she will.  So it’s time I stopped playing defense and started playing offense.”

“Derek…” Allison said, reaching for him.  “Are you sure?”

“It always comes back to him, doesn’t it?” Laura questioned them both.  “What is it about this family that has the two of you so bamboozled?  All of this is happening because of Stiles.”

“I’m sure.”

“Oh! Derek!” Allison clapped with glee.  “Stiles is defending you.”

“Don’t take it that far.”

x.x.x.x.x.

They talked him out of going to Beacon Hills for the first few days, Allison promising him that Scott said everything was fine in there, but when Stiles missed uploading a vlog entry on one of the days he habitually posted on – and the last time that had happened, the power was out in Beacon Hills for three days and Stiles had a stomach flu that stopped him from travelling to the next town over with his computer and webcam.

The guy was super dedicated, usually it impressed Derek but now it just worried him, because nothing would stop Stiles from uploading a video.

Nothing should.

Derek knew he wouldn’t be able to get the image of Stiles lying dead in the Preserve, or washing up to shore on the beach, or his jeep being pulled out of the rocks at the bottom of a cliff from his mind until he saw Stiles in person.

The flight was the longest he had ever experienced, and it didn’t help that he rarely willingly got on a plane after the accident that killed his family.  But he was desperate and scared, more scared than he was of the plane crashing.

Derek turned his phone back on once he was off the plane back to Northern California to find an email and a voicemail waiting for him.

The email was from Stiles, and just the fact it existed made him nervous, like he wasn’t sure what to expect, but also relieved.  He didn’t open it until he was sitting in the back of the towncar he had hired to take him to the local FBI office.  He wouldn’t go to Stiles in Beacon Hills yet, because that would just draw attention to him, but he could meet with Agent Matthews and talk over options.  Derek would meet with Kate wearing a wire if it would help.  He’d allow her to extort more money out of him if that was all they could get her on.  It would be enough to keep Stiles safe, even if it wasn’t ideal for Kate to be charged with anything less than killing his parents.

The email wasn’t what he expected.

“Drive faster, please,” he croaked at his driver when he saw the first five seconds of the video Stiles had sent him.  He wasn’t sure what he thought it would be, maybe a private few seconds of Stiles claiming his last blog entry had been for Kate’s benefit, but instead what he found was an image of Kate on Stiles’ computer, searching through his files, and Derek had to pause the seven minute video to focus on breathing, because there were a lot of things this could be.  It wasn’t necessarily Kate taunting him by reminding him what he had left to lose.

But he felt the fear down to his toes that she sent this to him from Stiles’ email to show him exactly that.

Then Stiles entered the room behind Kate.

“You’re looking for the video, aren’t you?” Stiles asked, arms crossed over his chest.  “You’re worried about what it says,” he smirked.  “You think you’re on it.”

“Don’t play dumb, Stiles.  I know exactly what Derek Hale has filled your head with.  I know he told you that I killed my brother and caused the plane crash.”

“You mean the truth?”

“Truth is relative,” Kate reminded him.  “So yeah, the truth as he sees it.  But do you think someone gets away with a crime by telling adolescent boys who have their heads filled with movie villains.”

Stiles snorted.  “Please.  Kate.  The types of movies I review aren’t just things that go bump in the night, some of them are based on real events.  The most chilling are based in real events, but you know what? Not a single one of those villains committed the perfect murder, because the perfect murder is leaving no trace of yourself behind and telling no one.  I can already tell that the second part is eating you alive.  Do you know why?” Stiles leaned close.  “You’ve hinted at it twice already to me, and I’m not even family.  I don’t even matter.  Was it thrilling when you told Allison?  Did you enjoy the fear?  Did you get off on frightening your own niece more than you did killing your brother?  That’s the thing I’ve learned from my silly little movies, Kate.  It’s not always the blood or the thrill of getting away with it.  It’s the fear in another person’s eyes and knowing you’re the cause of it.”

“You’re walking on thin ice.”

Stiles threw back his head and laughed.  “I’m not afraid of you, Katie.  You, or your terrible threats.”

“You should be,” she hissed, looking extremely self-satisfied.  “How does your mother like her new car?”

“Ohhh, low blow,” Stiles mocked as he shrugged and pointed his chin towards his webcam.  “Camera’s not on.  You know how much I hate Derek, so what do I care if you killed his parents?  It’s not that hard to crash a plane.  You can find information anywhere on the internet.  I’m really not scared of you, and your intimidation tactics might work on Allison, and Laura, and Derek, but I’m honestly not that impressed.”

“You’re next,” she promised, standing and sweeping Stiles’ computer off his desk in an overdramatic show of dominance.  “You think it’s easy?  Do you know what your jeep needs?  A break line. The same way a plane needs fuel.  Do you know how many plane crashes are caused by fuel issues and incompetence?  It was easy to help along back then, and it would be just as easy to help your break line along now.  So. Show. Me. The. Video.”

“You’re so bad at this,” Stiles said.  “You just threw my computer on the floor.”

“No, Stiles, I’m very, very good at this.  I killed four people and no one can prove it.  So here’s what you’re going to do.  You’re going to call Derek Hale and tell him I threatened your life, and he’s going to pay me…”

She broke off as the Sheriff entered the room.  “Kate Argent.  You’re under arrest for four accounts of murder in accordance to California Penal Code 187 and suspicion of extortion as defined in California Penal Code 518…” his voice trailed off as he slipped the handcuffs around Kate’s wrists and pulled her out of the room, a group of his deputies noticeable in the hallway. 

There was very little fanfare.  Kate barely put up a struggle, a shocked expression replacing her overconfident one until she shot Stiles a look of such loathing that Derek well and truly feared her.

Stiles waved cheerfully at them as they left before turning towards the camera and winking.  ‘You’re welcome,’ he mouthed before the picture went black.

With shaking hands, Derek opened the voicemail just as the towncar pulled up outside of the FBI Sacramento offices.

“Mr. Hale? This is Agent Matthews.  We have Kate Argent in our custody.  She’s confessed.  I’d appreciate it if you could come in and give your statement.  It’s almost over.”

Derek felt numb, experiencing too many emotions over the span of such a short period.  Fear and relief were winning.  Fear that somehow this would all fall through and Stiles would be the first Kate got retribution on, and relief that maybe it was finally over and the three of them could finally live their lives without the black shadow of Kate Argent hovering just on the horizon.  He walked into the FBI Offices quickly, almost at a run with the intent on finding out from Agent Matthews face to face. 

Then it would be real.  There were so many things that could go wrong. The arrest might not stick, or she could win the trail, but for now… for now he could enjoy the first moment of entertaining the possibility that it could end here and now.

All because of Stiles.  Because Derek had been right about him all along.

“Derek!” Stiles exclaimed in surprise, surging to his feet from his seat in the conference room Derek had been led to.  “What are you doing here?”

x.x.x.x.

Episode 14

x.x.x.x.

“Derek!” Stiles exclaimed in surprise, surging to his feet from his seat in the conference room Derek had been led to.  “What are you doing here?”

“Mr. Hale, please sit,” Agent Matthews indicated.  “As I said on the phone, I need you to give an official statement. If Mr. Stilinski would like to wait in the hallway,” he said meaningfully, “I still have questions for him once I can piece together exactly what led to the Sheriff arresting Kate Argent today.”

The FBI agent had that expression on his face like he had just been confronted by the squall of Stiles’ brand of clarification, a sudden burst of logic framed by actions that almost seemed illogical and foolhardy expressed in a storm of words and gestures and facial expressions that was wholly Stiles.

Derek knew how he felt.  He was still reeling from the video Stiles had sent him, but he knew that the story wasn’t easy to tell.  Derek was possibly the person who could piece together most of the details, and he still didn’t know what happened.  He hadn’t been blindsided like this since he and Laura received the call that his parents’ plane had gone down, and it felt like things had now come full circle.

“I’d like to stay,” Stiles insisted stubbornly, planting himself in a chair.  “I want to understand what I’ve gotten myself into.  I think you owe me that,” he said, staring at Derek. 

“It’s up to Mr. Hale.”

Derek couldn’t take his eyes off Stiles as Stiles observed him evenly.

Finally, he swallowed and nodded.  He didn’t really want Stiles in the room, but he could understand how Stiles felt.  Stiles couldn’t know for sure that Derek had been telling the truth in his video letter, Derek reminded himself, trying not to take it too personally.  Stiles had believed him when it counted.  Stiles had helped.

Giving him a little peace of mind about whether he made the right decision shouldn’t make Derek feel like all the air was being drawn from the room as he sat, Stiles settling in next to him now that the decision was made.  Derek was suddenly painfully aware of how the story sounded as he started to talk about Kate, their relationship and why Derek had broken up with her after the plane crash.  He spoke about how he suspected something, but he hadn’t been able to identify the reason why until he took Allison away from the toxic environment Kate had her in. 

He admitted to all the times he paid Kate off.

Derek had never said the words out loud to an audience comprised of more than family and the police before, and despite the fact that Stiles knew, detailing the story in front of him in person was far different than the video had been.  Even though he’d been speaking to Stiles, visually he’d been aware that he was speaking to a camera and editing or taking back certain phrases was an option.  Not sending the video at all had been something he’d deeply considered.

Now, if something emerged from his mouth he couldn’t retrieve it, and Stiles would know everything, every small piece of his history that really shook Derek up to speak about because he couldn’t help but be running on emotions.  Kate was arrested and the man Derek was in love with was the one who made it happen.  That was secondary to the fact that his parents would finally receive justice, and that there would be a long court hearing ahead of them, dragging this entire process out in front of witnesses.

He felt like he was barely holding it together.

He couldn’t help the tremor in his hands any more than he could help the thickness of his voice as he spoke, words forming around a tongue that seemed thick and desiccated in his mouth.  Every time he said her name, he choked over the word, fingers clenching on the table in front of him.

Hesitantly, Stiles reached out, hovering uncertainly over the table between them before Derek turned his palm over.

Stiles paused for a second before closing the distance between their hands, his fingers warm against Derek’s chilled skin.

Stiles placed his hand over Derek’s, fingertips gently resting on the fleshy part of Derek’s thumb, and across the heel of his palm towards his wrist.  It wasn’t quite a hand hold, but it was comforting all the same, and Derek looked over and gave Stiles a wan smile.  Now his heart was beating audibly in his chest for a whole other reason, but he could breathe with the solidness of Stiles’ touch grounding him.  Derek was sure that it was the first time Stiles had deliberately touched him, and while he couldn’t allow himself to be hopeful that it meant more than Stiles offering comfort, just the fact that Stiles had noticed Derek enough to comprehend that he needed it, and that he was willing to offer, meant more to Derek than he realized it would.

It felt like an actual overture towards friendship, towards Derek, than anything else had.  Everything else that Stiles had done up to that point could have been because of his innate sense of justice, or it could have been for Allison (and by extension Scott) but it was never just for Derek.  Derek knew that right down to his core.

“You can see in his email,” Stiles said calmly, passing over his phone to the FBI Agent.  “Derek asked me not to tell anybody, but Kate was getting more and more aggressive with her veiled threats and I realized that she was using my family the same way she used the Hales, so I told my dad.  He wasn’t overjoyed about my plan, but then Kate started to get closer to Melissa and… well, I came up with the idea to record her.  I didn’t think it would be so easy to get her to admit anything.  I just wanted to establish a baseline for the insidiousness of her threats.”

“You father was monitoring you?”

Stiles shrugged.  “My dad was doing whatever it was he was doing in his own house and he heard what she said.  She didn’t say it under oath, but she was the one cocky enough to admit to murdering people in the Sheriff’s house.”  He leaned casually in his chair.  “She’s confessed now, hasn’t she?”

“You may still be a witness.”

Stiles grinned.  “Sure thing.  I’m prepared to do my duty for justice and world peace. We’re done, right?”

“I’ll need you to sign your statements.”

“Take your time,” Stiles responded with all the assurance of someone a little too comfortable with dealing with authority figures and Derek had a rush of affection towards him.

“Thank you,” he said when his deposition was finished, staring down at the table.  At some point he’d moved so his hand was complete enveloping Stiles’, holding tight as Stiles detailed his plan for catching Kate and Derek understood fully the risk he’d taken.  Stiles had let him clutch at his fingers while speaking, never losing his calm, self-assured demeanor.

Stiles shrugged and took his hand back, wringing his hands with tight fingers as though dispelling the sensation of Derek’s skin against his.  Stiles’ smile was wry, but there was something behind his eyes that Derek couldn’t read.

“It looked like you were going to clench your jaw so hard your teeth would break, and I have this thing about sympathy stress, so… giving you something else to clench was just as much for me as it was for you, dude.”  Stiles looked away as he said this, stretching his empty fingers and then drawing them into a fist.  He stared at his hand as though he wasn’t sure what it was supposed to feel like anymore.

“I meant for… everything,” Derek finished, staring in fascination as Stiles’ cheeks colored as he looked directly back at Derek, his eyes the dark color of old gold as their gazes locked and held. 

“It wasn’t,” Stiles answered slowly in a soft voice, blinking as though in a haze.  Then he licked his lips and turned his face away, clearing his throat.  “I did what needed to be done to protect my family.”

“Yeah,” Derek said, and suddenly his hands were sweating and he felt nervous, because Stiles wasn’t acting confident anymore.   He reached out and squeezed Stiles’ shoulder as he stood, giving what reassurance he could.  “You’re a good person.”

“I don’t know why you think so,” Stiles laughed bitterly and shook his head at Derek.  “Derek, I’m going to let you in on a secret I’m not sure you understand.  I’m an asshole.”

“Didn’t you know?” Derek asked, smirking and feeling on solid ground for the first time all day, maybe all month.  “So am I.”

x.x.x.x.

Sometimes when I’m stressed I revisit the classics, and this week I chose Chucky.  Is there anything more laughable than a…

Stiles broke off and stared at his script.  It was almost telling to see him with cue cards when the only times he let on that his episodes were scripted was during role play and during times of distress.  He took the paper and crumpled it into a ball before tossing it sharply across the room.

He rubbed his head, looking so uncertain for a moment before squaring his shoulders, decision made.

…you know what, I can’t this week.  I was recently reminded that nothing that happens in horror movies is as bad as what humans can do to each other in real life.  That’s the real thing to fear.

There’s something I need to apologize for, and it’s not the fact I missed my last video update.  That couldn’t be helped.  I’m sorry for the tone of my last video.  I broke my pact not to talk about certain things, and I’m sorry for that, but what I really want to apologize for is what I said about Derek Hale.  I said that I would make sure that he got what he deserves, but the truth is that I can’t give him what he deserves.  He doesn’t deserve the things I say about him, and he doesn’t deserve the way I’ve treated him.  He tried to give me something of himself, and I didn’t listen.  He thinks he cares about me, but he doesn’t deserve that either.  He deserves so much better than that. Than me.

I’m so sorry.  Stiles stared at the camera, direct and breaking down that fourth wall so that it felt like it was just the two of them in a room together again.  I’m sorry for everything.

Most of all, I’m sorry that I can’t be the person for you, Derek.

x.x.x.x.

Episode 15 

x.x.x.x.

******

Most of all, I’m sorry I that can’t be the person for you, Derek.

He wasn’t thinking about it, he wasn’t.  He wasn’t thinking about how his feelings at hearing Stiles say something like that felt like he was walking on the edge of a blade, the sharp edges making his feet bleed but with a sense of elation that he was still alive, still balanced on that blade.  Stiles said what he said to push Derek away, and while it did give him a sense of closure to know that there wasn’t one-sided animosity anymore, Derek also had to ignore the strange delight of Stiles acknowledging him publically.

Stiles might not think he was that person for Derek, but the fact that he put thought into it and felt guilty for it… well, it was something.  Something that Derek had learned not to even hope for.

Something Derek was brutally shutting down because he wasn’t allowing the hope in, not this time.  He had to take Stiles at face value.  Stiles wasn’t the person for him, even if declaring it the way he did proved the opposite.

Derek wasn’t thinking about it.

He wasn’t.

At first, that was only true while he was working and he threw himself into his storyboard with a renewed vigor, but soon it was just truth.  Derek wasn’t thinking about it, because what happened with Stiles happened.  It was in the past, and maybe someday something would happen in the future, but today was not that day, and it was unlikely that tomorrow would be either.

“It’s about fucking time,” Laura said one evening when his phone chimed with the alert for Stiles’ newest vlog entry and Derek just silenced it.

“It’s cool that Stiles mentioned Therianthrope,” Allison said the next morning over breakfast.

“Did he?” Derek asked.  “Good, it’s gaining traction on the internet.  Word of mouth advertising and a good viral marketing plan are key to pre-publicizing the movie before it’s even cast.”

Allison’s mouth turned down at the corners.  “Oh… that’s. Yeah, I can see that.  You haven’t watched it yet?”

“I’ll watch it at work,” he said around a mouthful of toast.  “It’s more relevant than ever.  I might bring it up at the meeting to prove that the strategy is working. Next step is the conventions.“

“You actually think that’s a good thing?” Allison asked Laura, pointing at Derek with her thumb as he shoved half a slice of toast into his mouth, and then picked up his travel mug to leave with chipmunk cheeks. 

“Well he certainly doesn’t remember his table manners,” Laura responded, “but yeah.”

Derek reached a kind of calm zen through his work, moving forward with the project quickly, but not so quickly that he compromised the quality.   He worked until he finished the draft, and then he edited that until it was either call in a second opinion or go insane second guessing himself.  He sent out an invitation for some of the leading critics in the field to read the script. An agreement was made, nondisclosure clauses were signed, and partnerships were formed.

All that was left was for Derek to share his work and wait for the feedback, and that wasn’t an easy thing for him to do.  He might have taken risks with his heart recently, more than he was used to taking, just because he’d found someone he thought was worth the risk. 

Sharing his heart and sharing his script were two very different things.  In some ways, the storyboard for Therianthrope was far more personal, and if it was rejected and stomped on, Derek wasn’t sure he’d be able to regroup.  He’d given it everything he knew to give.  He’d poured in his heart and soul, as the saying went, but he’d also given it all his creativity and intellect, wringing himself out until he wasn’t sure what there was left to give.

Then he gave that too.

In the end, he sent it, trusting enough in himself to know that this was a necessary step and would make the movie stronger for it, even if all he received back was criticism.

Derek didn’t know of any other leading horror movie critics besides Stiles.  None that he would trust with this, and who he would trust to know what they were talking about.  Stiles was the voice of a generation, and he was, in Derek’s opinion, the voice of an industry, whether he knew it or not.

And if Stiles ripped his heart out again, well Derek would rather it be someone whose opinion he could trust.

****

Oh my god you guys, Stiles said, his face animated with excitement. Oh my god, I still can’t believe it. I’ve just been asked to be a consulted with Lycaon Productions.  Lycaon… do you guys know what this means? Lycaon is my favourite, ok? My absolute favourite.  They have a new movie coming out that promises to get back to their werewolf roots and I’m just… I’m the consultant, guys.  They saw my vlog and…

Stiles cleared his throat.

I mean, I’m honoured to be selected as a forward thinking member of the horror movie community.  I will bring my expertise to the role and… fuck it! THEY PICKED ME! I get paid, and there’s the offer of a suite in Los Angeles if I want to be on site, but it can all be done over the internet, and I signed a ton of forms, like a small forest of forms, but basically I’m allowed to talk about some things once I’m done with the contract, and Lycaon doesn’t even care if the things I say are positive, so long as they’re something I already vocalized and brought up beforehand so I’m not just bashing the movie without giving them a chance to fix it and… wow, it’s like the fairest deal in all the land.

He paused for a second, head cocked to the side.  “I’m not a princess, Scott! I’m not going to find my knight in shining armor. My… eugh, I can’t think of any others.  It’s just LA, do you know how superficial the people there are?”

“Allison is there,” Scott reminded him, sticking his head in the doorway.  “Are you putting this online?”

“Why, is my bubbling enthusiasm putting you off?  It’s ok to talk about this now. I’m marginally sure.”

“Yeah, and don’t worry, Stiles. You’ll find your… Mr. Darcy.”

“Har, har!” Stiles said, picking up a book from his desk and throwing it at Scott. 

So the moral of this fairytale, boys and girls, is I might not be as reliable about updating in the next month or so, but that’s because good things are happening. Really good things.  I’m excited and a little terrified, because what if it’s bad?   We’ve all heard the rumours about Therianthrope, that someone new is writing it, and I feel like it’s all I’ve ever wanted for a decade or more.  Like… imagine your favourite cancelled show (and I bet I can guess the one that comes to mind for most of you) is getting picked up again.  Rebooted.  Only, the original creator isn’t available, so now what?  Can it be just as good?  I think we all know what the answer we want to say is, but… I think it could be better, with a solid story and only justifiable usage of CGI. I can’t believe I’m attached to a project with this this much meaning.

Oh great, Derek realized, making a face at his computer screen.  He could see it reflected back to him, but he couldn’t, for the life of him, identify what his expression was trying to say.

He knew one thing for sure. 

Viral marketing worked.

***

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Act 1 Scene 1 action!

Derek couldn’t open the email.  It stayed in his inbox unopened, boldly mocking him for his weaknesses because of how giddy he felt to see it, and how utterly terrified.  He got up and went for a run, but the burn in his calves and the sweat coating his skin didn’t make the email go away.  It was tempting to have all of Stiles’ emails go to someone else in the company, someone who could summarize the content, but Derek (the guy who was kind of seriously in love with Stiles) didn’t want to miss a single thing Stiles said to him, and Derek (the professional movie producer) wouldn’t allow someone else to mess up a job he took seriously.

In the end, he huffed at his foolishness and sat down in his office chair, armed with a shaky veneer of professionalism, and opened the email.

It just said: OH MY GOD TALK ABOUT AN OPENING SCENE! You’ve caught my attention.

Derek grinned, hard and sharp, because as much as the first part of his personality wanted to fanboy over the fact that he’d impressed Stiles, it was the second that Stiles’ words really spoke to.

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Re: Act 1 Scene 1 action!

Please continue to send me reaction emails. You can send in more details later.

The email he got in response was almost immediate.

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Re: Re: Act 1 Scene 1 action!

Are you sure? You don’t really know what you’d be unleashing.  Overuseage of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! for one.  It’s good.  It’s really !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Derek smiled and immediately pressed respond.

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: Re: Re: Re: Act 1 Scene 1 action!

Yeah. Do your worst. I want to hear what you have to say. It’s important to me.

It always was.

x.x.x.x.

Episode 16

x.x.x.x.

******

To say that Stiles was an enthusiastic emailer was like saying that Stiles’ vlog was only ok.  It was a complete and utter understatement.  Derek ended up staying awake with Stiles until 3 AM, answering emails as Stiles read through Therianthrope.

And liked it.

And while he wasn’t actually watching Stiles, he was paying attention just as much as he always did, looking for enthusiasm and hesitation in the text just as closely as he watched Stiles’ expressive facial expressions.

By the end of it, their emails were more like instant messages, but Derek didn’t want to miss a single moment of Stiles’ reaction.  He didn’t want to miss the way Stiles flailed at the plot twist, or the way he asked questions that eventually got answered by the script and not Derek himself.  He answered truthfully when Stiles uncovered a plothole Derek hadn’t noticed, and Stiles reminded him that was what he was there for.

Everyone needed a second opinion sometimes.

Stiles, ironically and painfully, seemed to get along well with a nameless, faceless Derek.

They talked until Stiles ran out of steam and had to put the script down.  Going to bed that night, Derek felt both exhilarated and apprehensive.  He hadn’t wanted Stiles to know that this opportunity was from him, but he didn’t want to miss a moment of it either.  He wasn’t sure that could be the wrong choice when it made him feel so amazing and on top of the world, if only for a few seconds.

x.x.x.x.

Derek was only in the office for a few hours when Stiles sent him a detailed email of his analysis of Act 1, Scene 1 and 2.  This was the first time that the fact Stiles was in the middle of becoming rather well educated in the field came through.  Even Derek, with all his knowledge of one Stiles Stilinski, usually forgot that Stiles was getting a college degree, maybe because Stiles hardly ever mentioned it on his vlog.  To Stiles it didn’t matter that he was going to school because it had no real bearing on how well or how much he judged bad movies.  Stiles judged bad movies before going off to gain a degree on the subject, and he’d continue to judge bad movies when he finally finished school. 

It wasn’t something he advertised, and it wasn’t something you could tell while watching him on screen.  Where Stiles in motion was partially enthusiasm, partially effective body language and repose, and a whole lot of slang, Stiles’ writing was methodical and detailed and professional.

In other words, far more impressive than Derek thought possible, considering he was already impressed by the things Stiles did.  Derek had anticipated the need to clean up the text and occasionally ask for clarification, but even Stiles’ habit of misusing words in context didn’t seem to come up as often in his writing, at least as far as Derek could tell.

The fact that Stiles had gotten just as much sleep as Derek had and was still sending out this kind of analysis made Derek fiercely proud, even though it wasn’t his right to be.  A lot of people had been against his decision, and even Derek wasn’t sure if it was the right choice to make or if he was blinded by their history, but this… this proved that his faith wasn’t misplaced.

He sent Stiles back a quick note of thanks, asked him to include a point-form executive summary in the next analysis, and then forwarded the email off to the staff along with his own notes.  Stiles hadn’t always been kind in his feedback, but he’d been fair and the outcome was a lot better than Derek thought it would be.

Stiles didn’t hate Derek’s movie.

It shouldn’t matter, but if Derek had ever tried to tell himself differently, he was lying to himself.

x.x.x.x.

Derek woke up to a chime on his phone that told him that Stiles had posted something new on his vlog.  Groaning in exhaustion but apprehensive, he clicked on the link and watched as Stiles came up on his screen.  As the video was loading he could see the still image of the first frame: Stiles, hair a mess, in pajamas and holding the movie script in his hands in front of him like a shield.

In Derek’s experience, if Stiles had something to say to the point of saying it despite his vlogging schedule, it hardly ever went well for him.  In fact, some of Stiles’ only asides went very very badly for one Derek Hale.

He rubbed his eyes and blinked at the time, waiting for the video to load.  He was tempted to take his phone off wifi mode so it would go faster, but it was three in the morning and the fact he was able to press the play button after being woken up from a dead sleep was impressive.  Better not tempt fate by doing anything too complex, he’d probably end up dropping his phone on his face and breaking the screen against one of his cheekbones.

“I have to share this,” Stiles said, grinning, holding the script in front of him.  The script that Stiles had written all over the cover in red.  First circling the name of the movie with “Why?” and then crossing that out and putting “ALJFOAJFAKJFA!!!”

He literally wrote out a string of letters.  Stiles was unique.

Derek might just throw up.  This was so much worse on his nerves than asking Stiles out.

Stiles then schooled his face into a stern, unhappy expression.  “This movie.  This movie.”  He jabbed at the script.

“OH MY GOD!” Stiles flailed, hitting himself on the face with the script.  “I JUST FINISHED IT AND IT’S BRILLIANT AND THAT IS ALL I HAVE TO SAY ON THE MATTER.”

Then the screen went dark.  That was really all Stiles had to say.

Derek grinned in the dark, hiding the smile in his pillow as he settled back into a comfortable sleeping position.  He shuffled his feet a little against the cool sheets at the bottom of his bed as he found his comfortable spot.  He couldn’t stop smiling. 

Yeah, he’d done that.

x.x.x.x.

Episode 17  

x.x.x.x.

*********

“Ok, no spoilers, I promise,” Stiles said, putting his hand over his heart as he faced the camera.  “I signed a waver and everything, but I can promise all you horror movie buffs and werewolf enthusiasts, that it’s good.  Really good.  I asked for a copy of the original script and I can honestly say that whoever created the storyboard knows what they’re doing.  I wouldn’t have made better decisions in a lot of cases if I was the one creating it.  Perfect? No, of course not.  But I think the guy I’ve been in contact with is the actual director and producer of the thing, and he’s brilliant.  

Like, really really really brilliant.  A visionary.  This has the potential to be better than all the previous Lycaon movies.

And for some reason he’s actually listening to my input.  I thought this was some kind of… I don’t know, scam?” Stiles questioned the screen.  “No, that’s not the right word. I thought they’d bring me in as a consultant in name only, but I’ve already seen adjustments in just the first week I’ve been working on the movie.  Adjustments I’ve recommended.  And not just that, they’re not following me blindly.  The guy actually tells me why he’s making different decisions sometimes and this whole experience is just really positive.”

“Listen to me. I’m practically waxing poetics.”

x.x.x

“Ok Hale, I’ll admit bringing the kid in was a good idea.  Not just for the free publicity.”

“But?” Derek asked his media consultant.

“But, we need to use him for free publicity.  So far after every one of his vlog entries the traffic on the website has gone up. People are buying the digital versions of old movies from iTunes.  Whispers are starting about casting calls.  Now is the time to push forward.  I’ve scheduled you into a panel at WEREcon next month.  It would be smart if you invited the vlogger.”

Derek had no idea how to respond to that.  He could say with almost absolute certainty that Stiles probably had no idea that Derek and the guy he was emailing were the same person.  He didn’t want to have to tell him.  Stiles actually liked him somewhere, even if it was online, and though it felt dishonest, it also felt like a second chance that might get ruined if Stiles thought that Derek was trying to pull one over on him.  

Laura sometimes joked that Derek made the worst decisions, and he was in the middle of one right now. It had been a terrible decision not to be straight from the start about who Stiles was emailing.  Derek had hoped Stiles might not immediately make the connection between DH and Derek Hale, but he suspected that Stiles would eventually put it together.

“What if I say no?” Derek questioned.  He was the boss.  If he said no, then the answer would be…

“The movie needs this, Derek.”

x.x.x.

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: om nom

Can I marry your brain? Or eat it? Oh my God, how did you come up with this scene change?  It’s brilliant!!

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: RE: om nom

If you marry me for my brain, you have to marry the rest of me too.                        

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: RE: RE: om nom

Yeah? It might be worth it.

To: [email protected]

From: [email protected]

Subject: RE: RE: RE: om nom

Lycaon has been invited to do a panel at WEREcon and I’d like for you to be involved with the Q&A with me.  On the company dime.  Info attached.

x.x.x

“So I’ve been invited to a thing, and you’ll never guess what.  The director and… well, I think he’s the overall boss of Lycaon asked me to be part of a panel at the werewolf convention in Los Angeles in a month.  I don’t know if he’s jumping the gun or not.  I haven’t even finished analyzing the movie.  It’s possible that by that time he’ll hate me because there’s a scene coming up that I’m going to be critiquing the hell out of.  I’m not saying it’s bad, but it could be so much better.  I don’t know if my input will be as welcome for something like that as it has been for the generally positive stuff.  In convention time, a month is coming up really quick and this is actually short notice, but in constructive criticism and professional relationship time, anything can happen in a month.

I don’t know if I’m going to accept.  On the one hand – Los Angeles.  Scott can visit with the lady love, and we can see all the Hales.  If the hotel accommodations provided by Lycaon don’t work out, we could probably stay with them… or, well, Scott would be welcome, I’m sure.  

On the same hand – this is an amazing opportunity for my professional career! Like… a chance of a lifetime, and I don’t know why this is all happening for me at once.  Part of me is saying it’s because I’ve finally made it, all the hard work I’ve put into everything is paying off.  The other part of me is saying… well, I don’t know.  I have nothing.  There’s no negative here that I can see, but there’s something nagging at me and I can’t put my finger on it.

There’s no way I’m saying no, though.  It all looks very legit.

You guys will all come and support me, right?  I can’t wait to talk to all of you about this movie, and I’m really excited to meet the elusive owner of Lycaon.  His emails are all so great, so I think you’ll like him too.  I should probably do a bit of research on the company so I know more about it, but meh, that’s tomorrow Stiles’ problem.

“WEREcon! I’ll see you there,” Stiles winked.

“Oh no,” Laura said, getting a good look at Derek’s face.  “Are you dying?”

x.x.x.

“So it seems like no time has passed at all, but I’m here in LA and I’m trying a live session today on my new website, bought with the money I got from Lycaon. Fun, right?  I can see that I have a few viewers.  Hi mom and dad.

I haven’t read any of these before, but Allison printed me out a bunch of articles about Lycaon Productions, so I should probably read them before heading out to the panel this afternoon.  It’s one thing to work for them, but quite another to meet the head honcho face to face. I realized I know all these stats about the success of the company, but absolutely nothing about the guy who runs it. Not really even his name. He’s really charming and funny, but also incredibly professional. I don’t know how he puts up with my emails all the time, but, well… I think the fact that he does is one of the reasons I’m out here.  So let’s see…”

Another successful movie by David Hale…

“So that’s what DH stands for.  Hale. Huh. Most of these are dated from 2001.  Wow, guess that means that flirting wasn’t a thing happening.  Or… well, that’s sketchy.”

A plane crash claimed the lives of David and Talia Hale last Thursday, leading to an uncertain future for Lycaon Productions and their upcoming feature production with Cake Robot.  This bloggers is sure that neither Derek nor Laura are fit to step into their parents’ shoes.  The movie will be a disaster.  Thanks a fucking lot, Hales.

“Holy shit,” Stiles said, eyes wide. He didn’t move for a moment, terribly still in shock. Then, all the papers dropped from his hand and scattered all over his desk.  They fell out of view as he put his head in his hands, breathing harshly. “Scott!  SCOTTTTTTttttttt.”

“What?” Scott questioned, slamming in through the door. “Are you having a panic attack?” He hovered nervously at Stiles’ elbow.“Breathe!”

“I can’t.  I can’t do this.  I can’t go this afternoon.  I can’t. I… oh fuck,” Stiles said, reaching up and grabbing Scott’s lapel.  “It’s Derek.”

“What’s wrong with Derek?” Scott asked, immediately concerned.

“Derek Hale? Owner of Lycaon Productions?  The guy I’ve been emailing with for the past three months and who invited me to the werewolf convention to do a panel with him? That Derek Hale!”

“Stiles…” Scott was frowning at him.  “That’s…”

“Did you know…? Fuck, Derek Hale is my idol. He asked me out.  He sat in my bedroom with his heart in his hands and I stomped on it, and he’s my professional idol.  I turned him down and he turned around and hired me.  After all that.”  Stiles inhaled sharply, the sound wheezing through his lungs.  “Oh my god, I don’t know what to do.”

“Well, at least you know that you didn’t sleep your way to the top?”

“I hate you,” Stiles groaned.  “I hate everyone.  I hate myself.  I didn’t see this coming at all. You all said ‘Derek likes horror movies too’ and I laughed at the idea as though he couldn’t love them like I do.  Derek doesn’t just love horror movies.  Derek is the face of horror movies.  He and his perfect face, and I couldn’t even see it.”

“Are you live?” Scott said with dawning horror as his face took in the screen in front of him.  

“What?” Stiles asked, lifting his head.  “Oh motherfu…”

x.x.x.

“How about this time?” Laura questioned in a sarcastic tone.  “Are you dead this time?  Can you move?”

“I didn’t mean for this to happen live,” Allison said, crouching in front of Derek.  Derek blinked at her.  “He just blinked.”

x.x.x.x.

Derek expected Stiles to back out of the convention panel he promised to attend, but it never happened.  Part of him was glad that Stiles had found out beforehand because he couldn’t imagine the scene if they’d walked into the panel from different sides of the stage area.  Stiles would have loudly demanded to know why Derek was there, and that’s how he would have found out.  It sounded horrible, but at the same time less people would have bore witness to the event.  Now it was all over the internet, and their Q&A session went from being one of the least popular to sold out in the span of two hours.

Derek expected to hear from Stiles apologizing for not being able to make it.  He expected to hear that Stiles had checked out of his hotel room and cashed in his ticket home.  He expected to hear that he was doing the Q&A alone.

He didn’t expect to hear Stiles from across the courtyard café on the back deck of the hotel.

His laugh echoed through the outdoor patio, loud and rich and exuberant.  Derek turned away from the potential investor he was talking to and immediately looked towards the crowd.  He spotted Stiles immediately, standing next to Scott and chatting with a pretty red-head, and he took a step backwards, away from the idea of Stiles laughing with someone else in a way he’d never felt comfortable enough to do around Derek.

Stiles looked away from her for a second, eyes scanning the area for a place to sit, and their eyes met across the expanse of space. Time seemed to freeze for a moment as Derek waited for Stiles to react by turning in the opposite direction.

Stiles took a step towards him and Derek immediately took a step backwards, his foot hitting the edge of the fountain.  Before he could regain his balance, he was pitching backwards into the water with a rush of imagery of the people around him, flashes of colors and faces and the stone work of the fountain itself before he went under the two feet of water.  His elbow hit first, then his head, the water doing very little to temper the blow.  

He automatically gasped at the pain, inhaling water.  For a moment he thought he was drowning in front of everybody, but then he regained control of his limbs and surged into a sitting position, coughing and gasping for air.

“Derek!” Stiles’ voice had him turning in that direction, automatically seeking him out even as he sputtered to breathe through the water dripping down his face.

“Derek!” Stiles said again, pushing one of the people who had crowded around to check on him out of the way.  He was immediately kneeling on the side of the fountain, his knees soaking up the wake of water Derek had left when he fell in.  

“I’m fine,” Derek said, pushing off the slimy bottom of the fountain and getting to his feet.  Stiles stared at him as he stood, mouth hanging open.

“You sure are… I mean, are you sure?” Stiles asked. Derek wasn’t sure he could read the dumbstruck expression on Stiles’ face.  He’d never really seen it before, except in the second Stiles had realized that the person from Lycaon and Derek Hale were one in the same.  Then Stiles licked his lips and dragged his eyes over Derek’s body.  “Your shirt is soaked,” he said, and then laughed as Derek frowned and dragged the white button up away from his body.

“I should go change,” Derek responded, feeling his cheeks heat up slightly at Stiles’ frank perusal.  Oh. Wow. He didn’t know how to actually react to something he’d wanted for so long it seemed like a dumb pipe dream now.  Now that he’d witnessed Stiles freak out about who he was on a live podcast.  

“Wow, smooth Stilinski,” Stiles muttered as Derek sloshed out of the fountain.  Stiles seemed to be staring up at him as Derek spilled water all over the stonework in an attempt to get out.  He flailed a little until strong fingers curled around his elbow and Stiles was guiding him over the lip of the fountain.  “Your head is bleeding,” Stiles said, moving Derek into a sitting position and making him lean forward.

“Ow,” Derek said as Stiles prodded the back of his scalp.

“It’s not bad but you should get a disinfectant for it. It might need a few stitches.” Stiles had Derek’s head between his hands, staring down at him in a way that made Derek completely unaware of the tender spot on the back of his head.  Stiles was so close, and he didn’t seem in a hurry to move away.

“Thanks,” Derek said softly, reaching up and grabbing Stiles’ hands as they slid off his head.

Stiles cleared his throat and backed up a step. “Did you watch the live stream today?”

“I… yeah, I watch everything you do.”

Stiles snorted.  “That’s not vaguely creepy or anything,” he answered thoughtfully. “I’m sorry.  This whole place is clearly where you belong.  The movie is yours.  I never should have come here.”

“I invited you,” Derek answered in confusion.  “I brought you into this. If I didn’t want you to be here, you wouldn’t be.”

“I don’t know why,” he answered in a soft tone.  “Not after the way I treated you.”

“Because you’re the best, Stiles.”  The answer was simple, and even after all the moments Stiles just brought up, it was still very simple.  “You bring a fresh perspective to an old game we’ve all gotten complacent with.  I needed someone who wouldn’t allow Therianthrope to just be another werewolf movie.  I needed someone who knew how to make it better, who knew what to look for and how to fix it, and from the very first time I saw your blog, that was you.  The rest doesn’t matter.  The rest is my ego.  The movie is more than that.”

“It still matters,” Stiles answered, staring at him with a thoughtful expression.  “It doesn’t just go away.”

Derek didn’t know how to explain this to him.  “It means less to me.  All the stuff between us is my problem, but Lycaon is what’s left of the Hale family legacy, and Kate Argent may have taken away the people who mattered to the company, but for those of us who are left, the company is what matters to us.  So no, it doesn’t matter.  Not for this conversation, at least.  I put it behind me so I could do the right thing by my company and the people who work for me.  It doesn’t matter.”

“It’s…”

“Derek,” Allison exclaimed, breaking through the crowd with Scott fast on her heels.  He remembered seeing Scott standing next to Stiles right before he went under, so it wasn’t very difficult to figure out where he had disappeared to.  “Oh,” she said, taking in Stiles’ hand in his hair.  Derek was suddenly acutely aware of all the ways he and Stiles were touching – the hand in his hair, his hand braced against the side of the fountain so that his fingers were brushing Stiles’ thigh, the way their knees were pressed together.  Usually, he was hyper observant of their individual spaces, but there was something about getting everything off his chest that made him block all that out.  Maybe it was rage, or maybe it was perspective, but it suddenly hit him that Stiles had seem him at his most vulnerable a few times now and that it didn’t even matter to him.

Allison suddenly seemed uncertain standing there, Scott taking in the tableau with raised eyebrows.

“I need to change before the panel,” Derek said brusquely, brushing off Stiles’ touch as he stood. His knee immediately felt cold, and he missed the comfort of Stiles’ hand in his hair.  He was suddenly aware of how much his head hurt.  “Thank you for your help,” he nodded, but couldn’t bring himself to smile.  He didn’t want to be completely rude.  Stiles wasn’t the enemy, but he couldn’t believe all the things he’d managed to say. He wasn’t sure if his head was pounding because of the injury or if it was all the honesty.  “I’ll see you in a few minutes.”

Stiles nodded, staring up at him with an intent kind of expression that made Derek dizzy.

Or maybe that was just the blow to the head.

x.x.x.

“So Stiles, are you and Derek going to date now?  That’s what all of us are here to know.”  It wasn’t their first question, but it was the first that wasn’t easy to answer that wasn’t based on the discussion about Therianthrope.

Derek exchanged a look with Stiles.  

“Whoa,” Stiles said. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. Yes, I was surprised today but with all the history between us, I think if we went on to date right now that would be a bad decision bear.”

“Besides,” Derek joked into the microphone.  “Who said that I want to date him?”

“Do you?” Someone asked.

“A lot has happened,” Derek said with a shrug.  “Therianthrope is about to go into official production. Stiles and I both need to keep focused on the movie or else it might turn into a sappy love story like some of the recent werewolf movies in the past few years.  We’re not in the market for one sided love triangles.”

Some people groaned, but Derek felt decently confident that it was a good joke from the way Stiles smirked at him.

“Is there any romance in it at all?” Another member of the audience asked.

“Derek had a heavy hand in shaping the story into what it is,” Stiles reminded them, leaning into the mic.  “I think most of us have seen his idea of romance.  I mean, he’s a pretty romantic guy, right?”

“That’s a yes,” Derek continued.  “At the core, Therianthrope has romantic elements, but not in the way we’ve seen them develop in recent popular movies. This isn’t a story about teenage puppy love.”

“But,” Stiles continued from his place half-sprawled over the table.  “For you people in the audience who like a good shirtless scene, don’t worry.  Our lead male character takes his shirt off at least once in the script.”

Derek smirked back at him, enjoying the way Stiles claimed the main character was theirs.  He meant the company’s, but it felt nice. “Maybe Stiles will volunteer to sit in on casting auditions so he can judge their abs for himself.”

“While that would be fun, the funnest, really,” Stiles answered, looking at Derek with intent focus. “I feel like they’d all be at a disadvantage if I was comparing them to yours.”

The room seemed to pause in the space between heart beats as Derek inhaled and his pulse started to race from the compliment.  He looked back at Stiles evenly, expecting for him to suddenly realize what he said, but Stiles was giving him this knowing look, a slight pleased turn to his lips, like what he said had been entirely deliberate, and now he was enjoying Derek’s reaction.

Half of the audience went wild.  Derek had no idea what was going on.

“Does anyone else have a question?” Stiles asked before the moderator could step in.  He finished it with a wink.  Stiles was spectacularly good at this for someone who hadn’t grown up on the press circuit.  

From the front someone stood up and Derek immediately knew the type.  It wasn’t one of the fans of his work, nor one of the many fans Stiles seemed to have brought with him.  Instead, it was someone trying to cause shit.

“There’s a picture that showed up on Twitter of the two of you sitting by the fountain.  Stiles looks  shocked.  Is it true that you fired him after his outburst online earlier?”

“No.” Derek answered with finality, trying to close down the line of thought immediately.  Beside him Stiles looked a little confused at the sudden change of atmosphere in the room.

“So it doesn’t bother you that a member of your team said those things about you over the internet?”

“Has it ever bothered me what Stiles has said online? He kept to the agreement not to talk about the movie, so as far as I’m concerned the rest of it isn’t any of my business as the person who hired him as a consultant.”

“But isn’t it true that…”

“Ok, I think some of you need to know the truth of what happened today,” Stiles said, interrupting with a friendly smile.  “I saw Derek Hale wet, and his abs look like they were hmmmm,” Stiles said with an exaggerated moan and shiver.  “Hewn from marble.  Like seriously, whatever you’re doing, Derek, keep it up.  Is it the running?  Because damn.”

“Running after you, maybe,” Derek answered automatically and then froze as Stiles stared at him in horror. “Uh…”

“Oh my god,” Stiles answered in delight, cackling in Derek’s face.  He looked away, his hand over his mouth as his shoulders shook in mirth.  “I’m sorry I’m laughing.  This is so awkward, quick, someone change the subject.”

Derek could see on the monitor behind them that both of them were looking away from each other.

Someone seemed to take pity on them.  “Derek, what was your favourite movie as a child? And what does it mean for the new movie?”

“Mom used to tell me the story about how she wrote Lukánthropos based on fevered dreams she had during complications of her pregnancy for me.  When I was younger I used to feel like I had a part in shaping it.  Now, I think, that memory has shaped me.”

Stiles’ attention snapped to him the moment he mentioned the title of the movie and stayed on him the entire time.  Derek knew what Stiles was remembering, what he had now learned about Derek that was one of the first things Derek liked about Stiles and was ultimately, at the core of it, one of the things they had in common.  

“Will you show us your abs?”

“Uh.”  He really rather wouldn’t, but the session was going to well.  Any hiccups immediately had been smoothed over, and in the long run lifting his shirt wasn’t that big of a deal.

Stiles looked at him, and then back at the audience.  “Well, I’m sure you meant Derek, but Derek’s a very private guy so I’ll just show you mine,” he said, getting to his feet and pulling his shirt up.  He left it raised for a few seconds and then lowered it again.  “They’re not as good, but not bad, right?  I’ve been working on them pretty diligently for almost a week now!”

The audience laughed.

Fuck, Derek decided. Fuck.  He should have just went along with it, then he wouldn’t have a mental picture of the line of hair leading down from Stiles’ navel, bracketed by his hip bones and forming a clear arrow directly to a point that Derek was suddenly and madly interested in seeing.  The thing with Stiles was rarely just about physical attraction, but in that moment it was all Derek could think about: what it would be like to trace the exposed area with his tongue, to stand behind Stiles and slide his fingers down the line of him until his hand was tracing the line of Stiles’ cock and Stiles’ head was resting on his shoulder, harsh breath in his ear and the taste of sweat on his tongue.

“Stiles, how do you feel about the fact that your career hasn’t been based on skill after all, but because Derek Hale wants to fuck you?”

“What?” Stiles asked, going white.

Derek’s head snapped towards the speaker.  “You’re crazy if you think that I would compromise my movie by hiring someone subpar,” Derek said into the mic, grabbing it so violently that the feedback resounded around the room.  “This movie is more than me.  It’s a tribute to my parents and their legacy.  If this movie isn’t successful, I will be closing down Lycaon Productions. The only reason it’s still open after doing so poorly was that it was the only part of our fortune that my parents were actively involved in, and they loved it more than I can even express. Sentiment is only so powerful, so everything hinges on this.  I don’t give a fuck if Stiles likes me or not, because the movie is more important than getting in his pants.  I needed the best, so I hired Stiles.  It was a strategic move for the company.  If you’ve watched his vlog you’d know how good he is at tearing apart tropes that we’ve all become complacent with.  He’s here for his brain.”

“I think,” Stiles said slowly once Derek was finished, “that we need to consider egos here.  Would you hire someone who had just humiliated you on Youtube?  I wouldn’t. I’m not worried about Derek having ulterior motives for giving me this job, because that isn’t the way Derek thinks. He could have ruined me, and most of the people in this room would have at least considered it.  So no, to answer your incredibly offensive question, I’m not concerned about it, I don’t believe the insinuation for one moment, and if I see that rumour going around anywhere, I will take personal affront to it.”

x.x.x.x.

Episode 18  

x.x.x.x.

“You know,” Stiles said, wandering into Derek’s office.  He picked up a little werewolf figurine and toyed with the arms, setting them into a pose that made the werewolf look like it was aiming for a hug rather than a scare. His eyes took in all the posters on the wall as he turned a full circle.  “I probably would have agreed to marry you if you had shown me this room.”

 “I…” Derek started to say, his mouth open to finish the sentence when he realized he actually didn’t have a response to that.  If Stiles had agreed to date him, it wouldn’t be impossible for it to be partially his someday, but. 

Well. 

That was unfair.

 “I’m sorry,” Stiles blurted out, “that was insensitive of me.  Let me try again.  Derek. I really like this room.”

 “Thank you,” Derek responded, to be polite.  “Was there something you wanted to talk about?”

 “Not really,” Stiles shrugged, picking up a signed baseball on the desk and tossing it back and forth in his hands.  “So this is where the magic happens, huh?”

 “Some of it.  I try to get most of it done at work.”

 Stiles bit out a laugh. “I think that’s a blatant lie,” he said, slipping into the seat across from Derek and leaning forward so his elbows were braced on his knees.  From the corner of his eye, Derek could see Laura walk in the room and stop, taking in the scene in front of her.

 “Is it?”  Derek questioned, ignoring his sister.

 “Yeah, I think I got too many email responses at 11 pm for that.  It’s a shame Scott and I leave tomorrow.  It woulda been cool to see how we work together in person.”

 Derek smiled and looked down.  “I would have liked that.”  It sounded perfect, actually.

 “Well, maybe Skype now that you’re not trying to hide your identity from me…” Stiles leaned back in the chair, looping his arm around the back of it.  He turned his body just enough that Laura was visible, and it seemed to startle him to have a witness.  “Oh, hey Laura.  I’ll just get gone then.” 

And then he was on his feet and out of Derek’s office. 

“Sorry,” Laura said, but she didn’t look like she meant it.

 x.x.x.x.

“I really want to go back to Beacon Hills,” Allison said the next week at breakfast, stirring her yogurt with a discontent, melancholic sigh. If she didn’t miss Scott so much, Derek would assume Laura had a hand in it. “Do you think we can go up?  For the weekend, maybe?” 

“Therianthrope goes into production soon,” Derek reminded her with regret, though after everything that had happened with Stiles recently, he wanted that too.  He would foolishly follow a boy back to his hometown for another smile because Derek was sad and pathetic. 

 “Which means it’ll be at least six months before we can go back,” she pointed out.   

“You and Laura can go without me.”

 Laura made a face at him. Derek was tempted to make a face back at her. 

So he did. 

“In fact,” Derek continued. “Why don’t you stay there for a while? I’ll be working 80 hour weeks and at one point we’ll be shooting on location, so you can come back then if you’re tired of the idyllic countryside.”  He directed the last bit towards Laura.

 “Really?” Allison questioned, jumping up to hug him from behind.  “Thanks Der.”

 “She didn’t even ask me if I was ok with it,” Laura said, watching as Allison hurried off to pack. “Does she expect to leave right now?”

 Derek shrugged and smirked, taking a bite from his toast.  “Have fun in Beacon Hills.”

 “Oh no,” Laura said, pointing her finger at him.  “You’re coming up for a few days or both of us will stay here and I’ll start boxing up your werewolf figurines and send them to Stiles as presents.  He’s seen them now.  He’ll know who they’re from.”

 As far as threats went, that one wasn’t very effective.  It was actually a fantastic idea.  Stiles would love… “Okay,” Derek blinked, surprised by his train of thought.  “Okay.”  He could afford to take the weekend for himself at this stage and the best way could think of to spend it was to maybe get a chance to talk to Stiles in person, because every second he spent with Stiles felt like something new, and Derek didn’t know how to say no to that.

 .x.x.x.

 Derek finished lap ten when he realized he had a spectator, and he slowed his breaststroke to a crawl. Stiles was watching him from the side of the pool, tapping his foot like he was impatient, but also with no intention of actually stopping Derek.  His keen eyes were fixed on Derek’s back, and even though Derek was kind of really bad at figuring out cues, he knew Stiles was checking him out.

Again.

 “I hope this isn’t strange,” Stiles said, handing Derek a towel as he pulled himself out of the pool, water sloshing around him as his arms supported his weight.  He easily brought a leg up and used it to help himself stand, showing off a little at his ability to get his foot right on the edge of the pool and practically step out with a push of both his arms and his leg, going from in the water to standing in about two seconds.

 Stiles inhaled sharply as he handed the towel over, clearing his throat as Derek used it to swipe off his arms and face, before rubbing it over his chest.  He could feel water trailing down his legs from his swim pants, and he had a moment to wonder if they had dislodged and he was giving Stiles an eyeful, but he thought that Stiles’ expression would be very different than it was. For some reason, Derek thought Stiles would leer, not flush slightly and look away from Derek entirely.  

 “It’s not strange,” Derek assured him, moving to put his shirt back on.  It stuck a little to his damp skin, his hair dripping onto the collar almost immediately.  “Nothing you haven’t seen before,” he mentioned in an offhanded tone, sitting in one of the chairs on the desk.

 “Uh… yeah,” Stiles answered quietly, sitting beside him.  “Only the opposite of nothing I haven’t seen before.”

 There was a compliment in there somewhere, Derek thought, looking over at Stiles.  Maybe.

 “Everyone went to get sushi in the next town over and I came back to see if you wanted to come with us.”

 “Sushi?” Derek questioned.

 “Best in the area,” Stiles answered, fidgeting with a fray on the hem of his shirt.  “Which means it’s only mediocre, and we both know how discerning your palate is,” he finished in a teasing tone, seemingly regaining his equilibrium.

 “Mine?” Derek answered. “Remembering the rules you have about food would take a study guide.”

 Something crossed Stiles’ features.  “But you do remember them, don’t you?” he asked in an amazed tone.  “You do.  You did.”

 “I…”

 “Never mind,” Stiles finished, getting to his feet.  “Do you want sushi or not?  Because I’m really hungry.”

 “You didn’t have to come back for me.”

 “I don’t even know why I bothered,” Stiles answered in a self-defeated tone.  “Of course you don’t want to come.  Mediocre sushi isn’t exactly a major draw to get you to come out with us.”

“Wait,” Derek said desperately, reaching for Stiles.  “You’re right, it’s not, but I’ll come.  I don’t mind spending time with all of you.”  Stiles specifically.  If he could just convince Stiles to stay with him instead of joining everyone else, it would make Derek’s entire week, but Stiles never had wanted to spend time with just Derek, and Derek didn’t know why that would change entirely.

Stiles paused, really looking at him.  “You should put on pants,” he finally said.

 Derek wasn’t sure what he was doing.  He didn’t even care for sushi, had never been able to get into it no matter how popular it was in Los Angeles.  The moment he stepped into the restaurant, his sisters would know the real reason he agreed, and it didn’t really bother him after months of them knowing the things he’d do for Stiles, but it made him feel a bit pathetic because he received just a tiny bit of attention and was ready to drop his plans for the afternoon for the guy he was in love with.

 But, as he considered this, he wondered why Stiles had come back to get him when both Laura and Allison knew how he felt about the type of food they were eating.  He didn’t know what the story was there, and could barely even hazard a guess, but shouldn’t they have stopped Stiles?  If this was really about food, shouldn’t someone have said something?  That told him that one of his sisters (or both of them) had deliberately kept silent, which was practically unheard of unless they wanted him to spend time with Stiles.

 The catch there was that neither of them really cared to allow him to be alone with Stiles, not since Stiles broke his heart on the internet.  They’d warmed up to him after the panel, but he didn’t think that they’d come so far as to actually encourage Stiles to come get him for sushi.  

That left the possibility that Stiles was acting alone and hadn’t told anyone he was coming to see Derek, which seemed even more unlikely than the first option.  But… not as unlikely as Derek would have assumed.  He pulled on a pair of jeans quickly at the idea, hurrying back downstairs to find Stiles poking at his digital movie collection streaming to the PS4.

 “Would you like to get pizza instead?” Derek asked, pulling on his leather jacket.  “I hear there’s a great place in town.”

 Stiles looked up quickly and then grinned at him.  “Yeah,” he said, dropping the controller on the table.  “I’d like that.  You’ll love it.  They even passed the testing from the FDA.”

 Yeah, Derek would take that risk in order to spend time with Stiles.  What was one more risk, really?  Eating a bit of pizza because Stiles liked it wasn’t a big deal in the long run.  “Have you had it since?” 

“No way,” Stiles laughed. “Scott still gets nauseated at the scent of dough and cheese, but Scott’s sensitive.  So sensitive, dad had pizza pockets for lunch one day and Scott could smell it on his breath and almost yacked.  I should train him to scent out all foods dad shouldn’t be eating.” 

“Scott puked in front of Allison.  I think he’s justified in still being a little wary.” 

“I’m sorry I missed it,” Stiles agreed, getting to his feet.  “Just let me,” he trailed off, pulling his phone out of his pocket and typing on it.  “There, now they’re not waiting for me.  It’s time for pizza.” 

x.x.x.x. 

It was strange.  We had lunch and he told me about the time he played a mini werewolf in one of his folks’ movies, even credited on IMDB, and the time Laura took one of the props and scared her entire fourth grade class, and how instead of decorating for Christmas like everyone else in their neighbourhood did, his father decked their entire Bel Air mansion out for Halloween.  He didn’t even wince when eating the pizza, and he laughed at my dumb jokes.  He’s really snarky.  I didn’t really notice that before.

 I think I like him as a person. 

And remember when I said that it looked like his abs were legion in quality beneath his shirt?  Well I’ve seen them now.  I’m going to have to grade celebrities on the Derek Hale scale, which seems really unfair because celebs are basically paid to develop abs, and his are still better. What is life?  I feel like I’ve been lied to.  Normal people just aren’t supposed to look the way he does and not have some kind of work out addiction and unhealthy aversion to pizza.  And ok, so now I’m rambling judgmentally about ab muscles… but wow. 

“Admit it,” Scott said, sticking his head in the door.  “I think you kind of like him, fess up.” 

“I did!” Stiles exclaimed, throwing a book at Scott’s head.  “I already said that.” 

“I don’t just mean as a person.”  Scott laughed.  “You like him.  Someone is in denial.” 

“Shut up Scott!” 

“I don’t LIKE him,” Stiles said to the camera.  “I just really hate the fact that I didn’t give him a chance before.  I know, I know I already admitted that I’m an asshole, but wow, that’s what he meant when he said that I don’t give first chances, let alone second ones.  If I had given him a first chance instead of jumping to conclusions….” He trailed off uncertainly. 

“Well, I didn’t, so it doesn’t matter.”

x.x.x. 

Production was set to start on Therianthrope, and Derek felt like he was going insane trying to perfect it. He still managed to eke out time for Stiles’ vlog.

He probably always would. 

x.x.x. 

“Hi, I’m Scott, Stiles’s brother.  You can see him lounging on his bed behind me all lacksidasial with exhaustion from finishing his final review of the Therianthrope movie.  He said I could do today’s vlog, with his supervision of course.  The thing is, I don’t have much to say about horror movies besides “scary” or “not so scary” so I was thinking we could re-enact some of my favourites with the sock puppets.  So I have the Derek Hand puppet and the Philes Philanges puppet, and there were probably a few more puppets at one time but for some reason these were already out on Stiles’ desk when I got here.  Better desk than nightstand, right?” Scott attempted a wink. 

“Scott!” Stiles called out from the bed.  “Don’t!” 

“Really?” Scott retorted, facing away from the camera.  “I thought it was a good one.” 

“Yeah, ok.  It was,” Stiles conceded.  “No more, though.  I’m trying to nap.” 

“So as I was saying,” Scott said, returning his face towards the camera.  “Movie re-enactments.  What do you think?  Jaws? Dah-nuh Dah-nuh.” Scott made Philes chase Derek around the screen with his mouth opening and closing like pacman.   

“Segueing into Sharknado! That’s horrifying, right?” Scott said, spinning Philes through the air.  “Oh no Shark! Don’t eat me!” Scott made Derek Hand say.   

“Charles, what a deprived childhood you must have had,” Scott continued with the Philes character.  “I guess we’re doing X-Men: First Class now.” 

“That’s not a horror movie,” Stiles said from his place on the bed, his head hanging over the side of the mattress so he was watching Scott upside down.  “But awesome reference.” 

“I had a perfectly pleasant childhood, thank you,” Scott finished with Derek Hand.  “But it is a truth universally acknowledged that I am a rich asshole in need of a wife.” 

“Not it!” Philes said. “Even if you are attractive, Mr. Derekcy.” 

“What?” Stiles said from the bed, sitting up with a jolt. 

“Ok, StiLizzie. But I will love you from afar anyway.  I will give you everything you have ever wanted, and I won’t try to take credit for it.” 

“Owwww, motherfucker!” Stiles yelled, getting tangled in his sheets and falling off his bed.  “Stop it, Scott.  That’s not funny. Don’t make fun of him.” 

“Ok, Mr. Derekcy. Maybe my feelings towards you will change in the passing months to the point where our story is more Pride and Prejudice than Bride of Chucky.” 

“Bride of Chucky! That’s a terrible reference! Don’t go with Bride of Chucky!” Stiles yelled from his position on the floor where he was obviously flailing.  “Ouch. No.  Scott.  Don’t say that at all.  Retract. Redact. Why would you think my feelings have changed?  Don’t put this online.  Why am I still stuck in this blanket?”

Scott gave the camera a raised eyebrow and the most sarcastic look he was capable of.  “I don’t know, Stiles.  Why would I think that?” 

“Fuuuuck,” Stiles moaned meaningfully, going limp and allowing his body to fall back against the floor.  “Oh my god.”  For good measure he banged his head against the floor.  “It’s not Pride and Prejudice.  Oh my God.  Am I falling in love with Derek Hale?  Did he pull a Mr. Darcy on me?” 

“I don’t think it’s his move or anything,” Scott retorted.  “Is this actually news to you?  You spent the last 3 weeks talking about how amazing he is, and the 4 weeks before that talking about how great the producer ofTherianthrope is, and they’re the same guy. And before that you kept mentioning how he was an ok guy apropos to nothing because you were the only one bringing him up.” 

Stiles whined pitifully and flopped over on the floor, lying there like a starfish.   

“How many of you saw that coming?” Scott asked the camera.  “I know some of you are actively shipping it and have been since the beginning. Believe me, you’re not alone. There’s a real live support group right here in Beacon Hills.  Like… we didn’t actually think Stiles would turn him down the first time.” 

“Stop, Scott don’t make him rehash this.  You know Derek never misses my blog.”

“Allison,” Scott said, looking directly into the camera.  “You owe me $20.” 

x.x.x.

 “I’m holding in my hand a Lycaon werewolf action figure circa the 1990 promotion of Lukánthropos, limited production.  Only about 100 of them were ever made, and I… just received one from Derek Hale with a thank you note.  It’s… I…” Stiles looked at the werewolf in his hand.  “Thank you.  You have no idea what this means.” 

“No… I… know that you do, and that makes it mean a lot more.  Derek.”Stiles was looking directly into the camera, completely serious. 

Then an edit jumped forward, showing his smiling face as he held up the cover of the next movie he was going to review.

 x.x.x.

 “Hi,” Stiles said, giving the camera this intent look from beneath his eyelashes.  He licked his lips, giving the lens a direct look and held up a DVD. He was smiling, a flirtatious thing that translated over the computer screen.  “I think you’ll enjoy this movie,” he said, and Derek felt like Stiles was talking right to him.  “It’s has extremely witty moments and uses tension rather than gore as a fright tactic. The protagonist tries to be intelligent, but fails, and in my opinion that’s the failing of this movie.  There are some parts you’d really enjoy, though,” he raised his shoulder in a half shrug, glancing up at the camera again. “But maybe not.  You should take my word for it, though.  I think you’ll be surprised, and I don’t just mean by the sex scene.  It made me think of you, and while I don’t mean the sex scene specifically, maybe it did. What would you think of that?” 

Derek didn’t know what to think of Stiles’ message. It felt like Stiles was talking to him, and only him, but he understood enough about the process of filming to know that everyone who watched it probably felt that way.  Derek couldn’t identify a single part of what Stiles had that was for him and him alone, but at the same time he couldn’t identify any of it that wasn’t. It seemed to him that Stiles had done that on purpose, as a way for his followers to feel included in what he was saying, like Stiles was filming the message right to them in that dedicated, flirtatious tone he had adopted. 

And wow.  Just wow. He’d never really experienced Stiles’ charm full force before, and even now it was diluted through the screen and the knowledge he was sharing it with thousands of viewers.  He was glad it was happening that way because if Stiles was actually flirting with him, Derek wasn’t sure he could take it without doing something very forward.

 Stiles wouldn’t thank him for making things even worse between them if he grabbed and kissed him. Stiles would probably consider that the last straw, and Derek would feel terrible on multiple levels, because you didn’t just grab and kiss someone, no matter how intense their come hither eyes were.

 And Stiles’ were intense. Derek didn’t think it was just a matter of being swayed by the fact that he was in love with Stiles, mostly because Cameron from the AV department stopped by his office, made a show of fanning himself, and said: “Whoo, your boy.”

 “It had to be for you,” Allison assured him.  “I’ve never seen him like that, not even when the waiter at the sushi place was really coming on strong and Stiles tried to flirt back.  Who else would he be talking to?”

 “Any one of the people who comment on his vlog regularly.”

“They don’t love it as much as you do!  Stiles responds well to people who can have a discussion with him about what he talks about.”

Ouch.  Derek had never once left a comment for Stiles.  He’d thought about it.  He’d thought of creating a fake account and praising him every time he posted something, saying things to Stiles that Derek would never be able to say as himself.  When it came time to try, though, he realized he didn’t want to say those things to Stiles as anyone other than Derek Hale, which was definitely a catch.

 “Derek,” Allison warned, seeing the expression on his face.  “Why are you self-flagellating?  Do you realize that none of them can have the discussion about horror movies with him that you can?  Do you realize that Stiles knows this, and he doesn’t care about people who blindly love him, he wants discussion.  He wants arguments.  He wants you.” 

“We established that he doesn’t,” Derek pointed out. 

“Months ago!” 

“I don’t think I can go through being turned down again.” 

“Oh, Derek,” Allison answered compassionately, but Derek wasn’t listening.  He knew that her assurances would make him feel better, empower him to maybe take another chance on Stiles, but he didn’t know if that was the direction he was headed in.  He wanted to. He did.  Stiles was worth all the chances in the world, but he didn’t think he could go through all that again and come out the other side of it.

They were in a good place now, he and Stiles.  

A solid place.

x.x.x

Derek was at yet another horror movie panel trying to convince himself that sitting in front of a room full of people analysing his every movement, his every thought, was just part of the process.  It was just part of the process.  If he was good enough, made enough interesting points or markedly witty rejoinders, it would help promote his movie.

That didn’t make it easier.

Part of him wished Stiles was there.  Stiles had a unique ability to make Derek focus on him rather than on the people in front of him, staring at him.  When Stiles was with him, it felt like people were staring at the two of them, and sure maybe that should bother him, since their relationship was a festering gossip in the small horror movie press sphere, but it didn’t.  It gave Derek an ally in all of this, someone who had his back when he tried to bring questions back around to the movie itself.

Not questions like: “Don’t you think Stiles owes you more respect than what this latest blog post showed?”

“First: Stiles doesn’t owe me anything,” Derek hissed, back straightening and all sense of shyness dissipating like it never existed.  “That isn’t how life works, or at least it isn’t a good way to think.  If you think that he owes me now out of… duty, or worse, you seriously need to re-examine your definition of a healthy relationship. Second: he can flirt with who he wants to on his own blog – I don’t even… do you think there’s a contract somewhere stipulating that while he works for me he can’t flirt with anyone… again, reassess your thought process.  Third, and final: Stiles’ love life has nothing, absolutely nothing to do with Therianthrope.” 

(as an aside, his angry indignant face became a short-lived social justice meme with the caption reassess your thought process. Derek assumed Laura made the gifs herself, but then Stiles appealed to a lot of people outside of the horror industry who watched because they thought he was attractive and charming.) 

x.x.x

“I wasn’t flirting with someone,” Stiles blurted out the moment Derek answered the phone.  “Not just anyone.  You said some really good things today, things I appreciate, but I wouldn’t do that, not now.  Not with someone random.”

“Okay,” Derek answered slowly.

“I’m not sure it is,” Stiles answered.  “But that’s not something I’m up to talking about right now.  More importantly, did you watch the last movie I recommended?”

“Yeah,” Derek answered, a smile crossing his features as a warmth spread through his chest.  “Yes.  I particularly enjoyed the scene with the deer.”

“I thought you might.”  Derek could hear the smile.  “Listen, I got to go.”

“Hold on!” Derek said quickly, wanting to prolong this moment as long as possible.  “We’re going to do some location shots in Beacon Hills next week.  Do you want to get some first-hand experience on set?”

“Yes!  I really need to go, Der, but yes.  Yeah, I’ll be there.  Bye.”  

“Bye,” Derek responded, ending the call.  He felt warm and pleased, happy at nothing in particular, but because of everything Stiles.  It took him a moment to pick out the use of his nickname in everything about Stiles that made him feel amazing.  It was what his sisters called him, but Stiles using it made all the stress he was feeling because of the movie melt into something secondary. 

Beacon Hills couldn’t come soon enough.

x.x.x.

Derek was barely on set, his legs stiff from the long drive up to Beacon Hills following the equipment trailer.  The sun was bright overhead and he squinted against it, pulling his sunglasses out of his hair and shoving them over his eyes.  He took out his phone to text Laura that he was in town, not surprised to find a string of texts from both his sisters that had gone unanswered while he was driving. 

“Derek!” 

It wasn’t strange for someone to need his input, so Derek looked up as he texted, surprised to see Stiles walking towards him. He hadn’t expected for Stiles to arrive before he did, but he wasn’t sure why he hadn’t anticipated it.  Stiles lived in Beacon Hills.

Stiles was more enthusiastic about the movie than a lot of the staff. 

He waved, and Stiles waved back.  

“Hey, just the person I was looking for,” Stiles said with a strange smile.

Derek frowned at him, turning his head to the side as he observed Stiles, from the rigid set of his shoulders to the way he was flexing his hands, both definite signs he wasn’t happy.  “What’s wrong?” he asked.  Maybe someone had given Stiles trouble for being on set?  Derek hoped it was as easy as that.  Derek hoped it wasn’t him that was making Stiles unhappy again.

“I… nothing’s wrong, per se,” Stiles promised. He stopped and looked carefully back at Derek, laughing uneasily.  “It’s just… I need to do this now before I chicken out. You really meant it, didn’t you?  You’re really in love with me?” Stiles said with no lead up.  It certainly wasn’t where Derek thought this conversation was going. 

“Of course I did,” Derek answered, frowning.  He took off his sunglasses, because it seemed unfair to hold this conversation while Stiles couldn’t see half of his expressions. 

Stiles looked at him intently. “Has that changed? Do you still mean it now?” 

“Are you asking me if I’m still in love with you?” Derek asked softly.  Of course Stiles had concerns about working with him.  Derek had been behaving inappropriately recently, sending him presents hoping that maybe Stiles was warming up to him.  He couldn’t do anything but be honest, because Stiles deserved the truth.  “Of course I am.  That doesn’t just disappear.  Maybe it could, with time.  I did try. Your emails made it impossible to think of you in any other way but the one I see you in, but I can try to stay away this time.  If that’s what you want from me.” 

“No,” Stiles said, shaking his head.  “No. Derek, fuck.” He ran his fingers through his hair, turning away and pacing a few steps, before moving back in. He looked frustrated, and Derek felt his hope return. “You’re everything I didn’t know I needed until I realized you were standing right in front of me.  I turned you down. I broke what we could have been before it even happened.  I don’t understand how you can just stand there and tell me you’ll try harder to forget me, you should have cut me out immediately and you didn’t.  And that’s perfect.”  Stiles paused, breathing heavily.  Derek was surprised to find that he was doing the opposite.  He was holding his breath waiting for Stiles to finish.  “All I want is for you to give me a chance to make it up to you.” 

Derek had no idea what to say.  There had to be the right words somewhere to tell Stiles how much he wanted that, but how unnecessary it was for Stiles to have to prove himself to Derek.  It seemed almost foolish to suggest, because Derek believed in Stiles without reservation. “There’s nothing to make up.” 

Stiles squinted at him.  “You’re giving me confusing signals.  Is that a yes?” 

That’s when Derek realized what Stiles was asking, what Stiles was trying to say.  Derek had given Stiles a piece of himself so long ago, and Stiles was finally offering a piece of himself back. 

“Of course,” Derek breathed.  He could never say no to Stiles.  He’d been a lost cause the second Stiles first vlog opened with the words: Let’s get one thing straight.  My favourite movie will always be Lukánthropos, the cheeky werewolf tale put out by Lycaon Productions in 1990.  I might claim that other movies are my new favourite, but nothing will ever be better than my memories of watching that movie with my parents.  My mother, in particular, loved it.  She loved it in a way that she could never get sick of it, she told me once, right before she died.  So you see, it’ll always be my favourite movie.

 Stiles closed the distance between them immediately, his long fingers curling around Derek’s jaw as he leaned into Derek’s space. His eyes were all Derek could see, and the warmth in them still took him by surprise.  “Thank you,” Stiles said, so close that Derek could feel the words against his mouth until Stiles moved closer still, his lips pressing against Derek’s.

 It was a great first kiss.  Derek felt like he was buzzing with the sensation of Stiles pressed against him, warm against his front, and so gentle with his hands. Derek ran his fingers over Stiles’ spine, and smiled against Stiles’ mouth before pulling back.

 “I didn’t do anything,” Derek said, leaning his forehead against Stiles’.  

 Stiles snorted.  “Derek, you did everything.”

 x.x.x.

 “So I considered doing this live for about a second because it seemed just and fair and right, but… I didn’t.  Instead I did it the moment I saw him because I couldn’t not say anything.  I saw him and couldn’t wait.  I asked Derek if he wanted still wanted to date me.”

“I said yes, by the way,” Derek said from off camera.

“You asshole, you were supposed to come in frame for that,” Stiles frowned to his left.

“Like this?” Derek questioned, leaning in and giving Stiles a quick kiss.  He looked smug for a second, and then moved back outside of the frame.

“And there you have it,” Stiles finished.  “The man I’m dating.  Turns out the perfect person for me really is Derek Hale.”

~FINI