Chapter Text
Major Alenko:
I got news from the convoy. I know you are on the Citadel; head to the main office QEC now. Live broadcast in an hour.
Hackett
It had been half a year since the Normandy set off for batarian space with a small convoy of Council ships, what remained of the batarian navy, and civilian ships carrying the batarian civilians who were brave enough to leave the safety of Citadel space to return to their homeworld regardless of its current state. It took a few years of focused rebuilding in space occupied by species more reputable than the batarians, but thanks to the Crucible’s team discovering a code to activate the relays’ self-repair protocol, rebuilding is easier than pre-Reaper war predictions, and finally people felt like they could take the chance with helping the batarians go home too. Nothing was said about helping them rebuild, but it was heavily implied that it would depend on the convoy’s reception at Khar’shan - if they ever reach it. Shepard, now a symbol of galactic unity (or someone who can strong-arm the galaxy into some semblance of it), was chosen by the Council to lead the expedition.
An expedition that Kaidan was not allowed to accompany his best friend on, because humanity cannot afford losing both Spectres to the batarians the moment the convoy leaves Alliance comms range.
To make things worse, Steve was allowed to go as the Normandy’s shuttle pilot. While Joker remains as the Normandy’s pilot, Kaidan trusts no one other than Steve to deliver Shepard safely to a potential battlefield, stay alive while Shepard fights, and then pick him up and send him back to the Normandy. It wasn’t this big of an issue back then; Steve was just Kaidan’s friend, and the Reapers had a tendency to skew people’s definition of a safe flight and acceptable extraction.
Now that Kaidan and Steve were dating though, the situation becomes his boyfriend ferrying his best friend into the fray. Logically, Kaidan knows this is what he signed up for when all three of them chose to stay in the Alliance military after the war. Emotionally, however, Kaidan is terrified of losing them both at the same time to someone as trivial as a batarian who made the mistake of wanting to restore the status quo by killing all the humans kind enough to escort them to Khar’shan.
To make things worse, this could have happened already and Kaidan - and the rest of the galaxy - had no idea about it.
The Reapers all but annihilated the Hegemony’s communication infrastructure. The Crucible’s blast destroying all the active relays in the galaxy meant they would have to rely on FTL until the closest relay is repaired, and that is assuming that the blast left the pieces close enough for the self-repair protocol to gather the relay back together. There were only so many comm buoys the convoy could bring without the batarians accusing them of trying to control their communications. This meant communication between the convoy and the rest of the galaxy would be limited to what little bandwidth Traynor and the other comm specialists could squeeze into the few QECs the expedition brought with them.
Translation: no personal updates whatsoever until proper communication was re-established. Or, worst case scenario, they wouldn’t come back at all and Kaidan could only wait for news that would never arrive.
It was the main reason Kaidan often found himself at the Alliance’s main office on the Citadel. He might not be able to tell how Steve or Shepard feels at this exact moment, but the mission reports can at least inform him of how they are doing and what they were going through.
Like how the batarians played nice until they stumbled upon the first batarian colony and realised that the colonists, which consisted of a mixture of humans and batarians, no longer adhered to the caste system the Hegemony valued so much, rebellious enough to refuse the batarian navy landing permits at the colony’s docks.
Like how the turians and quarians of the convoy returned early, and the only explanation they could offer was, ‘This mission may take longer than expected and we need to return while we still have enough food to eat.’
Like how updates stopped for two weeks after the convoy supposedly reached Khar’shan, and it wasn’t until Hackett threatened them with sending backups to investigate that they received a reply.
Negotiations collapsed. Batarian civil war ongoing. Comm channels saturated. Situation under control. Updates slow.
Despite Shepard’s unbroken successful streak in bringing peace to the galaxy, ‘batarian civil war’ and ‘situation under control’ should not exist in the same message. The rest of the galaxy agreed. Then came the problem of whether they should step in and send support to the convoy. On one hand, people who helped the batarians return to their homeworld out of goodwill should not be abandoned to get caught in a civil war they presumably had no business in. On the other hand, the batarians were the only species who had not joined the Council - refused to do so until they had news on Khar’shan, even - and a fleet of Council warships entering batarian space could escalate the situation. They should at least send more supplies so that the convoy wouldn’t starve. Acting rashly might lead to their execution. They should launch a series of comm buoys so that the convoy could keep contact with the rest of the galaxy more easily. Comm buoys and mass effect corridors don’t mix.
Kaidan wanted to trust Steve and Shepard. He was also terrified for them. He kept himself occupied by scouring his network for intel even though most of the people he knows are Alliance soldiers anyway and they would have updated the Alliance on whatever development they can gather anyway. With so little information available, withholding intel wasn’t really a thing. No one wanted a galactic hero to die stuck in a war he never started and has no stakes in.
For Kaidan, the most torturous part was the utter lack of updates from Steve. Shepard at least showed his face in the earlier reports; they were either videos or calls and Hackett always let Kaidan observe. Shepard sounded like he genuinely believed in a better future, that the batarians would play nice and they would establish contact with Khar’shan and the final piece of the galactic community would be complete. Limited bandwidth meant there was no time for chit-chat and Shepard seemed hyperaware of it, deflecting Hackett’s every single attempt to ask about his wellbeing and always finding excuses to change the subject back to the convoy’s progress. Hackett never pried, but Shepard looked OK in the last video he sent to the Alliance before the convoy went dark. Steve, though? Kaidan hasn’t heard a single thing about him since the convoy went through the relay. No one has heard from any individual outside of Shepard since then so Kaidan knows his situation isn’t unique, but Shepard saw how close Kaidan was to sneaking onto the Normandy so that he could go with them and knew Kaidan was there for all of his reports to Hackett; he could have said something, anything, to tell Kaidan that Steve was doing all right, even though ‘all right’ would have been a relative term in the ensuing shitshow.
He wondered if Steve had the time for eight hours of sleep, if there were enough supplies to repair the Kodiak and the Normandy, if there was enough food for him to eat. The cynical part of him wondered if something had happened to Steve and Shepard’s deflection during the vidcalls was him trying not to talk about it. The hopeful side of him told him that Shepard wouldn’t betray their friendship like this, and he should treat the lack of news as good news. It meant Steve was still alive on the Normandy, probably supporting whatever Shepard was doing to diffuse the situation.
Kaidan hoped they were supporting each other through it. Shepard locking himself in the loft to obsess over mission reports and Steve isolating himself in a Kodiak to have a lonely sob was the stuff of Kaidan’s nightmares.
Outside of the two of them being enslaved, that was. The Normandy could outrun all the batarian ships, but there was no guarantee that Steve and Shepard would stay on the Normandy at all times. Kaidan hoped they were smart enough (and selfish enough, the pessimistic part of him quips) to stay on familiar ground and not step foot on a single batarian ship for negotiations.
As a Spectre responding directly to the Council, Kaidan wasn’t allowed to go on any missions related to the expedition. Hope was all he had.
With Hackett’s email, he hoped his prayers were answered.
Kaidan might have hacked the skycar to disengage its speed restrictions to get to the Alliance’s main office on the Citadel faster than it usually took. Was it an abuse of his Spectre authorities? Absolutely. Did he also see no less than 10 drivers violating speed restrictions on his way to work? Also yes. The second human Spectre speeding to get to work wouldn’t register on anyone’s radar.
A broadcast from the convoy could only mean one thing. He would see Shepard again after four months of nothing but reports and written accounts cobbled together in long, messy, stream-of-consciousness essays that somehow still managed to avoid talking about how he had been feeling. If things went well, he might even be able to ask about Steve after all this time. Unlikely, given Shepard’s responsible streak so far, but Kaidan could at least try. A ‘yes’ or ‘no’ after a ‘Is Steve Cortez alive and well?’ wouldn’t occupy too much bandwidth. Hackett could have taken the call without asking Kaidan to be present, and while Kaidan and Steve weren’t the most affectionate in public and often attended events separately, they also weren’t exactly hiding their relationship. Maybe Kaidan was too self-important to think so, but Hackett probably knew a thing or two about Kaidan’s… extra attachment in the convoy.
Kaidan could not think of another reason that would have prompted Hackett to forward every single one of Shepard’s rambly reports to him, without actually asking him to follow up on anything brought up in said reports. Kaidan wasn’t part of the convoy, wasn’t even one of the supporting staff left behind in Council space in case the mission went wrong; if anything, forwarding the reports was a bad idea, as each report would only convince Kaidan to go rogue and launch a rescue operation on his own a little bit more. He was a Spectre, so the Alliance wouldn’t have even been able to court martial him if he had returned from the operation. For Hackett to risk Kaidan disobeying orders, he probably knew something, right? Steve wasn’t really mentioned in the reports, but Kaidan assumed he must be alive.
Shepard wouldn’t betray him by hiding his death.
A hush descended upon the CIC as Hackett arrived with two armed escorts. It only lasted a second before everyone saluted him. Almost as soon as the first hand snapped up, Hackett made a dismissive gesture that translated to ‘at ease’, and people’s hands were down once more to return to their work. Then Hackett’s gaze was upon Kaidan. ‘Alenko,’ he said.
‘Sir,’ Kaidan replied, unsure what Hackett was expecting of him.
‘Captain Shepard will be glad you can join us today.’
‘Did he ask for me to…?’ it was not outside the realm of possibilities. Shepard could pretty much ask anyone to be anywhere and 99% of the times the people in charge (be it the Alliance or the Council) would say yes.
‘The call was scheduled in the name of the convoy,’ said Hackett as he checked his terminal. Hackett was on the other side of the central console, so Kaidan couldn’t see what he was checking for. ‘But we know who is on the other side and whom he wants to see.’ A pause. ‘And I am certain you are anxious for updates.’
‘I am,’ Kaidan admitted. There was no denying it. ‘It’ll be nice to see how Shepard is doing. In person, I mean. Not just from reports.’
‘You and me both, Major.’ Was it Kaidan’s imagination, or was there really a hint of a sigh in Hackett’s voice? ‘The way the reports are worded aren’t exactly comforting.’
‘Yeah,’ Kaidan said. Knowing better than to bring hopes up in front of so many people, he didn’t say he hoped Shepard had improved since then, especially when he knew so little about what was happening out there, wherever the convoy was, whatever the batarians - regardless of their factions - were up to. Of all he knew, it could be Traynor or EDI who requested the meeting because they were the main ones in charge of communications with the Alliance and needed to take whatever chance they could. Hell, it might even be Steve. The communication consoles of the Kodiaks on the Normandy were downright unrecognisable from their factory settings from all the modifications he and Kaidan did during the Reaper war to help the ground team stay in touch with the Kodiak during a firefight. It had its own network, could be isolated from the Normandy’s communication system, and Kaidan was pretty sure there were a few buoys out there still floating around in space. It wouldn’t surprise him at all if that was what it took to punch through the near-communication blackout.
Hackett took the hint and didn’t ask Kaidan to elaborate. Kaidan watched him turn towards the comms specialist whose name Kaidan couldn’t remember - so many people rotated out of the job of monitoring communications with the convoy because the silence either drove people crazy with boredom or made them depressed - to confirm that the connection was secure and stable (yes for the former, no but improving for the latter), and Kaidan let it all fade into background noise.
They didn’t want to compromise the safety of the convoy. Repeatedly hailing the participating ships would only cause a communication congestion and prevent the ships from talking to one another, and the last thing the Alliance wanted to do was jam the convoy’s comms while they were engaged against whatever forces that were trying to blow them up. Or worse, but Kaidan tried not to think about that possibility. The background pings from the Normandy were regular and steady; it wouldn’t have been the case if she was engaged in combat.
Kaidan found himself gravitating towards the terminal displaying the pings received. It was set to silent right now so that the beeping wouldn’t be a nuisance, but there was a time when people would do anything to hear one beep. Now, even without the noise, the short line consisting of nothing but the Normandy’s QEC address reminded Kaidan that they would be in contact soon.
Finally he identified the emotion he was experiencing: genuine excitement. He was excited to have a call with whoever would appear on the other side. He was excited about receiving real-time news from the convoy. He was excited about seeing Steve again, the slowness of regular FTL travel be damned.
‘The signal is getting stronger, sir.’
Kaidan glanced at the clock. Exactly one hour from receiving the email asking him to come. He drifted towards Hackett even though all the terminals had received the same update. Someone took the time to connect every single work station at the CIC to the call, though Kaidan knew the main recipient was the terminal Hackett was using.
‘Let us wait,’ Hackett said, pinching his nose and then letting his hand slide down his jaw. He looked exhausted, and Kaidan couldn’t help but wonder if he knew something everyone else didn’t. The answer was probably yes, and Kaidan tried not to speculate on it. The convoy was finally free enough for a vidcall, so it had to be not that bad. It had to be.
‘Admiral, the Normandy is hailing us.’
Kaidan’s heart skipped a beat. He didn’t have time to mentally prepare himself; Hackett had already ordered the specialist to patch them through.
Shepard’s hologram appeared above the central console. His face appeared above the smaller terminals on a flat screen. Kaidan thought he looked thinner, like he hadn’t been eating enough. He probably didn’t; while the biggest ships of the convoy carried enough food to feed themselves for a whole year - if they rationed it well - whether Shepard could keep up with his caloric needs as a biotic was another question.
Shepard rubbed his eyes, then his face, like he hadn’t quite woken up fully yet. ‘Hey,’ he said, the low rumble betraying his exhaustion. ‘There you are.’
It had been a voice reserved for quieter times, for half-heartedly strategising in the loft with the glow of the fish tank as the main source of light. Kaidan supposed it was a good thing even though Shepard probably didn’t intend to use his private voice in a public call; it meant the Normandy - and probably the convoy - wasn’t in immediate danger.
Kaidan also wasn’t the centre of the call. It was Hackett. Kaidan never witnessed Shepard use that voice on Hackett before, which meant now he was paying full attention to the conversation.
‘We’re in public, Shepard,’ Hackett’s reply wasn’t chastising. Kaidan would even say it was affectionate, almost, and he could almost hear people trying to contain their surprise at the sight of their usually impassive fleet admiral being so openly warm to another person. ‘Major Alenko is present as well.’
Kaidan didn’t need Hackett’s orders to step closer to the console. He didn’t know where exactly the camera was, but from the way Shepard’s face lit up, he must have entered the frame.
‘Give us the update, Captain,’ Kaidan said before the conversation could be derailed. Business first, then personal stuff later; that way they wouldn’t be accused of using precious resources for idle chit-chat. Then I would be able to ask about Steve, he thought as well, but knew better than to say it out loud.
Thankfully Shepard seemed unfazed by Kaidan’s tone. ‘The civil war is over,’ he said. ‘Balak is dead. His navy has been annihilated. Whatever correspondence we will have with Khar’shan will be with the new republic. We will re-activate the relays to facilitate rebuilding within what was known as Hegemony space.
‘There is much work to be done after we got back because…’ a pause as Shepard seemed to struggle with finding the suitable phrase, ‘because so many formerly enslaved people of different species wish to go home. Some of their homes might not exist anymore. Either way, they’ll need services, and their transition will be the smoothest only if we, the rest of the galaxy, cooperate with the next government.’
‘The new government have no problems letting go of their slave labour?’ Hackett asked.
Shepard shook his head. ‘Indoctrination was only part of the Hegemony’s downfall. Upholding a strict and oppressive hierarchy in the face of the Reapers hastened it. The new republic didn’t want to repeat the mistake.’ A sign. ‘And, letting people go home also means less mouths to feed.’
‘How many are we expecting?’ Kaidan asked. No doubt some people would have problems with so many former slaves trying to re-integrate into the galaxy en masse; he wasn’t going to give them a chance to say no.
‘It’s hard to estimate,’ was Shepard’s unsurprising reply. ‘Lots of people are on the fence about leaving batarian space. The new government is a good mix of batarians and humans who want to make their home a better place, and the Reapers destroyed so many people’s homes. If there was nothing left to return to, some of these people would rather stay in whatever community they’ve got here. Even if they all decided to stay - which I doubt would happen - the current estimates are in the millions.’
‘I’ll pass it on to the Council,’ said Kaidan. ‘This isn’t something the Alliance can handle alone.’
‘Agreed,’ said Shepard. He opened his mouth as if wanting to elaborate, but then he shut it, reigning in what was probably an opinion that would ruin his reputation as the galaxy’s saviour and the Council’s shiniest Spectre. Kaidan wagered it was something about the Council’s history of putting human colonists against the Hegemony.
‘And the convoy?’ Hackett asked.
‘You need to be more specific than that, S-Admiral.’
Kaidan barely managed to keep his face cool. He did not know Shepard and Hackett were on first-name basis.
‘Will the convoy remain in batarian space?’
Shepard let out a soft chuckle. ‘No,’ he said, his grin widening. ‘We’re done here.’
‘Any casualties to report on?’
‘No, not really. Nothing some medi-gel or bone knitter can’t fix,’ Shepard said with a shake of his head. Then he glanced off-camera with a sigh. ‘The only good thing that came out of being sidelined in the civil war. It was frustrating to watch, but more people got hurt maintaining their ships or training for the worst than actual combat. The convoy is coming home with all ships unscathed.’
The CIC erupted into cheers. Kaidan’s cheeks were painfully stretched, but he couldn’t stop grinning. Even Hackett had a small smile on his lips; from the corners of his vision, Kaidan could see quite a few people, most of them young soldiers who only ever knew Hackett as an Alliance legend, staring at the admiral. But the convoy was coming home with only a few scrapes, and soon their attention was directed to the celebrations. The only unaffected bubble was the one consisting of Kaidan, Hackett, and Hackett’s guards; plus Shepard, if they counted the other side of the call too. Not knowing how long this moment would last, Kaidan struck.
‘How’s Steve?’ he asked. ‘The two of you have been taking care of each other, I hope.’
Shepard’s expression was deadpan. ‘We enable each other.’ Kaidan crossed his arms in front of his chest, and Shepard chuckled. ‘Yes, we have. He keeps telling me to eat more and sleep more. Said I shouldn’t be so stressed about something I can’t control.’
‘He’s right, you know?’
‘He’s not the one in charge of the equivalent of a small fleet ensuring that our former enemies have a smooth ride back home. He’s not the one who watched as our plans became obsolete because there turned out to be a new government on Khar’shan. The old navy went in guns blazing because they didn’t like the idea of ruling batarian space alongside their former slaves, and we couldn’t even help the new republic because they were too proud to receive help. I think I am allowed to be stressed. And don’t compare it to the Reapers. It’s a different kind of stress.’
Kaidan heard Hackett’s quiet chuckle and decided to ignore it for now. ‘Bet you hated that more than Balak dying and technically failing your objective. How’s Steve dealing with all this?’
‘Like most people, he’s more frustrated about not being able to send messages back home than what’s unfolding in front of him. I don’t think the thought of being caught in the crossfire or enslaved ever crossed his mind.’
‘Or maybe it did and he hid it from you,’ Kaidan said, remembering what happened to Robert. Being taken by the Collectors wasn’t the same as being enslaved by the batarians, but the similarities were still there.
‘I did ask, and I think he was being genuine when he said no,’ Shepard said. ‘He damn near took the Kodiak apart just to keep his hands busy. Do you have any idea how disappointed he was when he realised all the shiny new upgrades he did were never going to be put to use?’
‘I can imagine that.’ To this day Steve refused to tell Kaidan how much he paid out of his own pocket to upgrade the Kodiak. ‘Wait, you never got to go out? Not once?’
Shepard scratched his head. ‘We might have sneaked into republic strongholds a few times before the war was over, but that’s about it. We barely got shot at. Steve said he got more excitement driving a skycar down a Citadel highway than taking me to negotiations.’
‘Good to know,’ Kaidan said even though Shepard’s definition of ‘barely getting shot at’ was probably a lot more than what an average person would put up with. ‘Help me pass on a message, would you? Tell Steve I miss him and am looking forward to seeing him again.’
‘Funny you brought that up,’ Shepard’s expression was schooled back to a mask of professionalism. ‘I have a proposal, one that you and Hackett need to hear.’
‘What?’ Kaidan asked as he felt Hackett step forward.
‘Now that the relays are open, we have a lot more bandwidth available. We joined the convoy knowing we might not have a chance to call home until we are back in Council space, but…’ Shepard tilted his head to one side, his eyes hopeful, ‘I think we can afford letting everyone call home early, tell their friends and families that they’re on their way back. If we leave a few comm buoys on our way - and the batarians have given us permission - we can make regular calls. What do you think?’
‘I can’t see why anyone will be opposed to it,’ Hackett said. ‘It is a yes from the Alliance.’
‘I can pass the word around.’ Kaidan couldn’t imagine anyone saying no to more communications with the convoy. If they did, he would just patch Shepard through and let Shepard do the talking. If that didn’t work, they could team up. Or have Liara threaten or blackmail them into letting people send a few damn messages and have a few vidcalls. Kaidan wouldn’t be opposed to that. ‘Just… one thing. Let me pull one string.’
‘Go on.’
‘Any chance you can let me call Steve… soon?’
Shepard breathed a laugh. ‘You got it,’ he said. ‘I’ll let you know the time as soon as we’ve got a schedule down.’
‘Send my regards to the rest of the crew, too.’
‘I will,’ Shepard said. He looked up, and Kaidan just knew somehow that EDI was talking. When he turned his attention back to the call, he looked regretful. ‘Gotta end this now. We’re going to activate a new relay and it’s going to take out most of our comms.’
‘I thought you were repairing old relays.’
‘Some are too damaged for the autorepairs to work properly. We got a partial map of the relays in this region. It’s a safe detour. The most time-consuming part of coming home will be harvesting fuel from gas giants.’
‘Let us know how it goes once you’re through,’ said Hackett. ‘Keep us updated - now that you can.’
‘Aye, Steven,’ Shepard threw a mock salute at the camera and cut the call.
Kaidan and Hackett exchanged a look. Between business and Shepard’s casual address, Kaidan decided to be safe and focused on business first. ‘I’ll tell the Council and start making arrangements,’ he said. ‘The galaxy deserves to know.’
Hackett nodded. ‘See to it, Major.’
‘Sir.’
It wasn’t exactly a spring in Kaidan’s steps, but he sure felt lighter than before. He was certain the good news played a part in it.
Stepping out of a loud, rowdy room might have contributed as well.