Chapter Text
I can still remember the moment I was told that my Rocky would soon be returning home.
It had been weeks since a mysterious figure had arrived at my nest to inform me that there was some urgent news regarding the mission to Tau Ceti. I needed to travel to the astronomy hive immediately to receive the information.
I felt nauseous during the entirety of the train ride. Internally, I knew what was coming. It was going to be the confirmation of my worst nightmare – the very thing I had been dreading for the past 60 years. Even though I knew that I needed to hear it, as it would allow me to finally move on, it still terrified me to think about.
They were finally going to confirm that my mate and all of his crewmembers had died.
The anxiety of finally hearing those words, of having the small glimmer of hope I had that Rocky could still be alive snuffed out, plagued me leading up to the day of the conference. I felt just as sick and panicked as I had during the week before Rocky’s departure. The anticipation was nearly killing me.
I was ushered into a moderately-sized room where a panel of Erid’s finest astronomists, engineers, and government officials sat, staring me down.
The first thing I noticed was that I was the only civilian in the room. I had expected to see the mates, friends, and families of the 22 other crewmates aboard Rocky’s ship; several of whom I had grown rather close to over the years, especially through the support groups that had been made for those still dealing with the grief of losing their loved ones. The fact that it was I, alone, in that cold room was both daunting and wildly confusing.
I was quickly directed to the front of the large table. I sat down with my lower pair of hands fidgeting uncomfortably in my lap and my top pair folded neatly on the table. I felt my entire body shaking with dread. Beaded droplets of sweat rolled down my face in streaks.
Despite their cold expressions, I could tell that the board members surrounding me were anxious as well. I couldn’t blame them; I would feel the same if I had to break the news to some poor soul that their mate had died, most likely terrified and in pain, within the depths of space.
The eridian at the other end of the table nervously twiddled their thumbs – very obviously doing everything they could to avoid addressing me directly. I immediately recognized them as the head of the Astrophage Research Commission. Rocky had met with them quite a few times while he was simply an engineer working on the ship’s construction. He had described them as an awkward fellow who, while brilliant, “didn’t seem to have the best people skills”.
To break the seemingly neverending silence that had plagued the room for the past few minutes, an eridian in a white lab coat sitting next to the uncomfortable individual cleared their throat before focusing their attention to me.
“It’s a pleasure to meet with you, Adrian. We hope your trip wasn’t any trouble. We apologize for calling you here on such short notice.”
I immediately perked up a bit, adjusting my posture and taking a deep breath before I spoke, as to avoid anyone from hearing the tremble in my voice.
“The trip was perfectly fine, but I would like to know what news you have to share with me. I apologize for my impatience, but I have been kept waiting for quite some time now with no information as to what’s actually going on.”
The head of the ARC finally perked their head up and met my gaze. “Ah, yes, I apologize for that. It’s just – well, I’m not entirely sure how to put this…”
I took a deep inhale. This was it. This was the confirmation I had been dreading for 60 years. There was to be no more senseless hoping or dreaming after this.
I dug my nails into my skin and waited for the words to finally come tumbling out.
“Your mate is alive.”
I nearly choked. I immediately shot up out of my chair, my top pair of hands gripping the table beneath me with such fervor that I had most definitely left indents.
“What?! What the fuck do you mean he’s alive?!”
The eridian leaned back a bit in their chair, clearly a bit frightened by my reaction. They took a second to compose themselves before leaning back in and jumping into their explanation.
“We received a radar transmission a few days ago. It was brief, but it was from Rocky. He’s alive, and he will be returning to Erid with a solution to the astrophage crisis.”
I felt my entire body crumble beneath me. I fell back into my chair while my head brutally slammed down onto the table. I let out a loud, breathy wail and cried for what felt like the first time in years. Crying in public was considered to be quite the embarrassing display on Erid, but I didn’t care – he was alive. My mate, my Rocky, was alive.
After I had finished the rather cathartic release of emotions, I lifted my head back up to face the ARC head once again. I ran my fingers through my hair in a desperate attempt to ground myself before honing back in on the conversation.
“I’m sure you’re wondering why you were the only one brought in. Well, uhm, Rocky was the only one of his crew who made it. We will be informing the loved ones of his late crewmates in due time, but we wanted to make sure that was done separately.”
I sniffed loudly and used my sweater to wipe up the remaining tears still falling down my face.
“Yes, I understand. How devastating,” I lamented, feeling a heavy weight on my heart for my friends and the ones they had lost. About a minute passed by before the ARC head addressed me again, allowing me to slow my breathing and fully compose myself.
“There is one more thing I have yet to mention, however…” the anxious eridian stuttered out, shifting uncomfortably in their seat. I raised an eyebrow and wondered to myself what else they had been waiting to tell me.
“Rocky isn’t…alone. In fact, he, uh…the ship he is returning on isn’t his ship.”
I froze in my seat.
“What? He isn’t alone? You said all of his crewmates died!”
The eridian winced slightly before continuing.
“He met an, uhm…”
He paused.
“...an alien.”