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Turning around for what must have been at least the one hundredth time that night, Bilbo lay on his back, trying to will his brain into finally letting him fall asleep. But sleep still continued to evade him, ignoring the hobbits pleas to welcome him into the warm embrace of unconsciousness. Instead leaving him stuck, staring at the wooden ceiling above, frustration growing within.
The loud chorus of snores coming from the dwarves around him did nothing to help Bilbo's irritated mood. It seemed like apart from him everyone else had fallen asleep long ago, the stress of nearly losing their leader and constantly having their lives on the line had taken its toll on all members of the company, even if some did a better job at hiding it than the others. Which meant that finding a safe place to sleep, even if it had a large bear roaming the land nearby, was something none of them took for granted.
Even with an aching body begging for rest Bilbo just couldn't sleep. After months of sleeping outdoors being surrounded by nothing but trees, having four walls and a roof around him felt suffocating, as if the room around him was slowly getting smaller and smaller until it would eventually crush them all.
It didn't help that he had become so dependent on watching the night sky, or more specifically the stars above him every night as he fell asleep during this quest. Since he could remember Bilbo had always loved stargazing, spending hours at night lying in the long grassy field surrounding Bag-End trying to memorize the names of all the different constellations. With the wooden roof hiding the sky seeing them was impossible. So, despite the single rule Gandalf had given to not leave the cabin that night, Bilbo did exactly that.
Being careful to avoid accidentally stepping on the mass of limbs sprawled all around him, knowing that in return he would be gifted an axe or sword to the leg by a very angry dwarf, Bilbo snuck his way towards the large door they had entered from earlier that day. A loud creaking noise came from the hinges as the door started to move, Bilbo winced as he looked back to where his companions were sleeping but no one seemed to stir at the noise.
The land surrounding Beorn's home had a peacefulness to it that Bilbo hadn't felt since they left Rivendell. Although there was no magic, or at least not the strong feeling of it that had settled over the elven home, Bilbo felt the exhaustion that had buried itself deep in his bones start to fade.
Finding a spot in the long uncut grass close to the entrance of the cabin, Bilbo sat down, already feeling far more relaxed than he did inside.
"Trying to sneak off again?"
Jumping at the unexpected noise, Bilbo turned around to see Thorin leaning against the wooden pillar only a few steps behind where he was sitting. The dwarf had a look on his face that Bilbo struggled to decipher, it was completely different to the scowls and glares he had become used to being on the receiving end of.
"With that massive bear around? No thank you, not all of us here have a death wish." Expecting some kind of push back for his comment or for Thorin to dramatically storm off back into the cabin, seeing a small, badly concealed smile on his face shocked Bilbo into forgetting the rest of his sentence. He had only seen the dwarves smile once before, on top of the carrock only a few days before and it was as mesmerizing as it was back then.
Bilbo cleared his throat, ignoring the lingering thoughts he had about the dwarf in front of him "I just needed some air, their snorings bad enough outside but in there I can barely hear myself think." Although not completely false, it felt easier to say instead of opening up to the dwarven king out of the blue.
Having to be careful of his injuries formed by becoming a chew toy for Azog's warg, Thorin left his position against the beam, a wince appearing on his face before he realised and quickly replaced it with the neutral look that seemed to don his face more often than not. Bilbo looked away, not wanting to embarrass him by bringing attention to the pain he clearly tried hard to hide, but looked back when he felt a body sitting right next to him. The closest they had been to each other since the embrace they shared on top of the carrock.
A few moments passed before Thorin broke the silence "And it has nothing to do with the stars?"
Out of every possible thing the dwarf could have said that was one of the most unexpected. It's not as if Bilbo had been trying to hide his nightly routine but the idea that Thorin had noticed it enough to remember was something he found himself not minding. Looking to his right at the taller figure, Bilbo found himself lost for words.
Clearing his throat, Thorin didn't move his gaze from the night sky "You aren't the only one who likes to watch the stars at night." For a split second his eyes turned to Bilbo, before going back to the array of stars above them, the hobbits eyes following his soon after. "In Erebor I hardly ever saw the sky, there was far too much to be done and I rarely left the mountain." Bilbo froze, not for the first time that night. He hadn't been told much about the stolen dwarven kingdom, especially about their former princes life there, he didn't want to move in fear of spooking him into stopping.
"The first few nights after we fled from Erebor I didn't sleep, I couldn't. Not with my people in so much pain. I would watch over them at night, while the king, my grandfather, and the rest of my family would sleep. That first night, when everything was gone and it felt like there was no point in having hope I noticed the stars. Not just the quick glances I gave them the few times I had been outside previously but instead I just stared at them, for longer than I can remember. And they were beautiful." Bilbo couldn't help how his eyes made their way over to Thorin, it was like this invisible force was pulling him closer to the dwarf and he had no plans of stopping it, not when he saw how Thorin looked at him.
It was almost overwhelming how quickly this thing between them had changed. Bilbo would be lying if he ever said that he didn't have some kind of interest ever since Thorin made his dramatic entrance both into Bilbo's home and his life. Even with the less than positive way he had been treated, the feelings he had only seemed to grow.
"When I was little I had this friend, her name was Jessamine, we were only a month apart her age, me being born a month after her. She was the first true friend I had" It felt weird to speak of memories he had tried hard to bury under grief and pain, but there was something inside Bilbo that compelled him to continue "She died when we were only twelve, some sickness that she just never recovered from. One night, a few weeks after she died my mother brought me to a field nearby our home, and as we lay in the long grass she showed me the stars. Hearing her label the different constellations helped me relax for the first time in weeks."
"Do you still remember any of them? The constellations?"
"Not as well as I used to, but I am sure some memory still remains of them" Bilbo squinted, looking at each of the different clusters of stars before he recognized one of them, pointing to it as he spoke "Over there, that one is called Telumendil, it was my mothers favourite one, although I can't remember it's Westron name anymore."
It wasn't until he finished speaking that Bilbo realised how much closer they had gotten to each other, his right shoulder brushing up against Thorin's left with every intake of breath they took. Unable to tear his eyes away from the blue ones staring back at him, that seemed to refuse to look away except from a quick glance to the hobbits lips.
"Bilbo-"
If you asked Bilbo what came over him in that moment he wouldn't be able to give an answer. Maybe it was stupidity, or some courage hiding deep down inside his body finally making itself useful. Or maybe it was Took inside him that caused Bilbo Baggins to kiss Thorin Oakenshield.
It only took a second for the hobbit to regret his decision, letting his impulsive side get the better of him until he felt a pair of arms snake around his waist, nearly pulling him into the dwarves lap, having to hold onto the large shoulders in front of him for fear of falling over.
His lips were chapped and his beard slightly tickled the hobbits smoother face, but it was far from the worst kiss he had ever experienced. That went to his first one with a hobbit lass whose name he had forgotten quickly after it happened, both of them preferring to pretend it had never happened.
Wrapping his arms around Thorin's neck, their kiss deepening until a loud slamming came from the cabin, the two quickly separating from each other. Gandalf stood at the open doorway, a furious expression on his face, making even the dwarven king cower slightly.
"Was my warning not good enough for you? If you want to ignore it still and be eaten by Beorn be my guess but if not get back in here!" Not waiting for either of them the wizard stalked back inside, this time leaving the door open.
"We should probably-" Thorin tilted his head towards the door as he spoke, his eyes still not leaving the hobbits face.
With a new found confidence Bilbo reached up on his tip toes, placing a quick kiss to Thorin's cheek before following Gandalf inside, ignoring the shocked look he had pulled from the usually stoic dwarf.