Chapter Text
I needed to get out of bed and get dressed. There were only so many times I could re-read the first chapter of my Intermediate Potioncraft I textbook, and I had to get ready for class soon. Each semester, the first day always made me almost unreasonably anxious. I never handled the shift into new routines well. Even at the beginning of my third year here at Haven Mage-Academy, I still felt like I was staring into the unknown. I glanced out the large window that sat just above my bed. The golden light of dawn was fading quickly. I had to shake off those nerves. Reluctantly, I set the book facedown on my bed and dragged myself up.
After a light breakfast, I felt more settled and ready for my day. I still had a few minutes to spare, and one task left. Really, I should’ve done this yesterday, but I was… hesitant. Worried wasn’t really the right word. This was important and exciting, but daunting. Afraid of disappointment might have been a better way of describing my feelings.
Rummaging around the pantry in my dorm’s small, cramped kitchen, I found the wooden rack containing nearly a dozen small, glass vials I’d hidden away. On paper, I was at Haven to study alchemical sciences so I could become an apothecary, but creating these elixirs was the true reason I was here.
The first version hadn’t done anything. I’d made it only a year into my studies, and I failed to actually make a potion, just something that amounted to complicated and gross tea I’d wasted ingredients and mana on. Last year, I’d lucked into a breakthrough with the second, but only gotten one of the desired effects. Over the summer, however, I’d gotten closer, and with no new information or ideas to test, this was a recreation of version III. I really should’ve taken the first dose when it was finished yesterday, but the next best time to take it was now.
The clear, bluish liquid didn’t smell or taste like much, but the effect was immediate. In the short span of time between drinking the contents of one vial and re-hiding my stash, all the fuzz I’d felt in the shower was gone, unable to be seen in the mirror when I walked over to check my appearance. I gave my reflection a small, satisfied smile. The rest of my outfit seemed to be in order, too, so I ran a brush through my wavy, shoulder-length hair. I stared at myself in the mirror for a moment longer, my reflection’s stormy grey eyes staring back at me. I still didn’t really feel comfortable with my looks now, but I was…passable. I at least felt more confident, less like I was faking than I did only a few years ago, even if I wasn’t really that much further along. Either way, improvements were improvements, and I needed to collect my things, strap on my boots, and get to my first of several lectures.
***
The first two lectures of the day had been nothing but a dull haze of professors rambling on through shallow, rehearsed personal introductions and dryly going over syllabi that were near-identical to any other lecture one could take on this campus. By the time I made it out of the second hour-long course intro and through a brief lunch break, I was feeling far too tired already. Too tired to be greeted with the bubbly, energetic surprise of my acquaintance and frequent study partner, Hilde, when I arrived at my next lecture.
The modest lecture hall was home to a chalkboard, a podium, and a broad desk at the far end of the room, with several rows of paired desks between them and the door. Hilde had chosen a desk exactly central to the room, with a seat open next to her, and had begun to wave me over the moment she’d spotted me. She’d likely beaten me in due to most of her courses being in this same building, whereas the business college was across campus from the natural sciences building where my morning classes were held.
“Aurora! Hey!” the blonde girl called out cheerily, “Over here, girl, saved you a spot!”
I gave her a courteous wave back, and slowly made my way to the open seat beside her. I placed my well-worn leather bookbag on the desk as I sat down, and before I could fetch my notebook, or even greet Hilde properly, the extroverted girl had already started talking again.
“How’ve you been, girl? Haven’t seen you since move-in day!”
“I’m doing alright,” I replied neutrally. “I was busy studying last week.”
I removed a blank notebook as well as a fountain pen from my bag, and turned my head to more thoroughly take in the lecture hall. It had the same slate walls as any other room or hall in the building, decorated here and there with a few bland motivational posters.
“Wow, you were?” Hilde’s continued small talk brought my wandering attention back to her. “I know you’re kind of a shut-in, but you really didn’t have anything more interesting to do?”
I winced internally at her comment. My studies were interesting. Why would I be here if I didn’t care about learning? I figured I shouldn’t voice those thoughts. Most of them shouldn’t be voiced in regular conversation, I tended to accidentally make people uncomfortable if I let my words come out unfiltered.
“No, not really,” I responded. “I’m surprised you’re in this class, I thought you weren’t going to be taking it until next semester.”
“Yeah, I was, but apparently one of my legal intro courses was over-filled and I was one of the saps who got the short end of the stick. I had to shuffle my classes around, and I knew you were attending this lecture.”
“Well, it’s good to see a familiar face,” I sighed, “I barely recognized anyone in my lectures this morning, let alone knew anyone’s names.”
“That just means you gotta get out more, girl,” Hilde commented lightly. She reached into her own book bag, pulling out a notebook far less dense than my own, and opened it on her side of the desk. “Can I copy some of your notes?”
I sighed, but handed the blonde my notebook regardless. “That explains why you wanted to take the same class as me.”
Hilde gasped in (what I hoped was) mock offense, her hand falling over her heart and batting her eyelashes at me. “Well I can’t help it if one of my dear friends also happens to be very very very smart.”
“You can have my notes if you decide not to overly flatter me.”.
“Deal!”
She only got a few minutes to pour over my pre-lecture notes before our professor, an elderly gnomish man, entered the lecture hall and immediately launched into an introduction.
Our professor’s low, monotone voice was the perfect white noise to daydream to. My family, as well as several teachers during my childhood, had told me on many occasions that I had an over-active imagination. Maybe they weren’t entirely wrong, it is in fact good manners to listen to one’s professors, even when they aren’t giving out any important wisdoms. But it was always my quick-moving thoughts that had made me so naturally suited to witchcraft and alchemy. I’d learned my first cantrip at only age eleven after all, not something many mages without an inherited magical ability could claim, and I’d earned a full scholarship through both my intuition and a strict, dedicated regimen of study and practice. So yes, even if my active imagination was occasionally an issue, I allowed myself some grace.
Over the last few months, however, my daydreams often drifted in a different direction… a far less productive one. My thoughts wandered not to spell formulas, rituals, or potioncraft, nor to my career aspirations of joining an apothecary guild or successfully completing my experiments, but of one of my friends. My closest friend, really. An athletic, extroverted, siren-voiced warrior-bard who played the harp well enough to tug at my heart on the rare occasion I got to hear her play. I had been lucky enough to befriend Elysia during our first year, but last semester I’d begun to see her… differently. I wasn’t sure what exactly had sparked it, but lately I found my thoughts consumed by her.
Daydreaming of creative applications for plant-manipulating spells or of oft-unwise ways to tamper with alchemical formulas was something that had always been helpful for me, but daydreaming of Elysia hadn’t been anything but interruptive. Working myself up with memories of the times I’d been invited to observe her Integrated Combat Casting training was very, very unproductive. She really did look handsome with a longsword in hand and sweat on her brow, though. And, stars, what I wouldn’t give for a chance to reach up and place a hand on one of her horns. I’d like to find out how they felt to touch. Her eyes were enchanting too. I’d not met a demon before her, and they’d struck me immediately with how different they were from mine, void-black with glimmering orange irises, and -
Fuck, I was doing it again. I had to stop thinking about this, she would never date me, and she’d think I was creepy for having these thoughts. It was nothing but a distraction. I forced myself to re-focus on the present, squeezing my left forearm with my right hand, blunt fingernails digging into my skin slightly. Our professor was done with his personal introduction, apparently, and had moved onto yet another copy-cloned syllabus.
A muted cough to my right prevented my mind from wandering back to blessedly-toned arms again. I glanced over towards Hilde, and saw her slide a small, folded piece of parchment across the desk to me, her eyes pointed forward and down at our professor. I glanced between her face and the paper. Her eyes darted over to me, her face still pointed forward, and gave me a playful, encouraging wink.
I took the paper, and opened what turned out to be a hastily-scrawled note. I must’ve been really out of it if I hadn’t noticed her writing it. A single line was written out in blue ink:
Are you feeling well? You’re seriously tuned out, did something happen last week?
I rolled my eyes and reached for my own pen to write a response.
I’m alright, I read through all of the class information yesterday, so I’m bored.
As soon as I passed the paper back to Hilde, she quickly scratched out another sentence. I hoped passing notes in class was not going to be the norm with her.
Want to meet up this weekend? Vex and I are both going to be free for sure. No study group needed yet so we can actually do something fun. For once.
I think I can make time but I’m not entirely sure. Have you invited Elysia?
I bet Ellie will be free! I haven’t asked yet but she told me her sparring league isn’t meeting up for another two weeks.
That last line was followed up by a crude sketch of what I assumed to be a winking face. I looked over to her quizzically after a minute or two of trying to decipher what she meant. She merely wiggled her eyebrows before turning her attention back to our professor, who seemed to be wrapping up.
“Okay everyone, just get your hands on the textbook if you haven’t already,” the professor droned on. “Read chapter 1 if you have time, but it’s not necessary to do so yet. You are dismissed.”
The small lecture hall filled with chatter after that dry dismissal, and I quickly stood and gathered my things. My next class was in another building again, so I couldn’t dither about. I realized before I left that I should give Hilde a polite goodbye, but she beat me to it.
“Good luck with syllabus intro number four, girl,” she joked. “Don’t drift off too much without me around to help you refocus.”
“I think I can manage,” I replied half-heartedly.
“If you say so! I’ll keep you informed on our little get-together once I ask the rest of the girls!”
I merely nodded my thanks, my mind already wandering off to musings over how boring my next professor’s biographical presentation could be.
***
It was around two hours before dusk by the time I was finally able to set my book bag down by my desk and sit down on my own bed. I’d been able to find time to read a bit of a new book I’d checked out of the library between my last two classes, thankfully, but it hadn’t turned out particularly engaging. I was tired. Luckily, my only two classes tomorrow were practicals, and those usually held my attention better, even during the introductory courses. Intermediate Potioncraft I and Antitoxin Basics - both sure to be useful for my future career, and hopefully promising for my personal endeavors. I’d be bubbling with excitement and shaking my wrists if I had the energy.
I flopped down on my chest, laying my head on my pillow for a moment of rest before realizing I would need to get up again and make myself a small supper. The motion of laying down in such a manner pushed my padded bra into my chest uncomfortably, so I begrudgingly turned over, my blouse becoming partially untucked due to the awkward motion. I wished I didn’t need that awkward chest prison to look right. I brought my left hand up to my chest, saddened as I contemplated the slightly-off texture and compression of my outfit’s padding, rather than the breasts I desperately wished for. Maybe someday I’d figure it out. Hells, I’d already figured out the hair-suppressant, skin-softening, and scent alteration with version III of my elixirs. If it existed, I could find a solution.
Inhaling the pleasant blend of scents from the small garden of herbs and flowers I kept around my room, my mind wandered off, contemplating the progress I’d yet to make. My stomach rumbled loudly after a few moments, reminding me that I hadn’t eaten in several hours. I sat upright, twirling a strand of my hair with my finger as I tried to decide what to cook for myself. A soft knock at my door interrupted my deliberation. The voice that accompanied the interrupting sound made my stomach flip and my cheeks flush.
“Aurora, are you in? I was wondering if you’d like to get something to eat together.”